Posts by John Brown (no body)

Pork pulled: Plug jerked out of beacon of bacon delight

Re: Technology

"Not just kitchens. Haven't you ever been to a hotel with a guest-operated conveyer toaster at the breakfast bar ?"

Toaster? Oh! That must be why I got funny looks from the other guests when I put my undercooked bacon through it.

Re: 404: Bacon Not Found

E.g. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GAqIynamBMY

Holy crap! Those tiny little slices are more fat than meat! And you'd need a whole pack just to male one bacon buttie. And it's pre-cooked for you in a microwave! Sacrilege!!!

If I had a Facebook account I'd be starting up a campaign to collect and donate bacon care packages to send to those poor suffering souls in the US. And maybe a Kickstarter campaign to raise funds for re-education centres to teach those poor deluded souls what bacon is meant to be.

Come on El Reg! It's Christmas. Can we re-vitalise the SPB and arrange air drops of real bacon for our colonial cousins via a fleet a PARIS aircraft? We could name the project PIIIIIIIGS IN SPAAAAAACE!

I'm sure theres a vending machine around here that will give me a pack of "Frazzles"

Do "Frazzles" have any bacon product in them?

Vitamin Water gets massive publicity for new flavor: Utter BS

Re: They've overspent on this concept

"Adding vitamins to it is an expensive waste of time"

They know that too, so don't do it. Vitamin is just the name, not the description.

Forget your deepest, darkest secrets, smart speakers will soon listen for sniffles and farts too

Re: My security system already listens to everything.

"Think of the confusion/mayhem if you had a dog called Alexa AND an Alexa device..."

Such as a military dog called Fire? (true story)

Re: You What!

"Do sane people pay money to put them in their homes?"

No, they are "free" because we all pay a surcharge on our bills to cover the cost whether we want them or not.

Re: I gotta hand it to them

"Audio Analytic has found a way to take an already deeply creepy and disturbing thing and make it even creepier and more disturbing."

I still live in hope of a Star Trek like future but fear we're more likely heading for The Space Merchants combined with The Marching Morons.

Time for a cracker joke: What's got one ball and buttons in the wrong place?

Re: Another mouse tale

"Because they often worried that one wrong move would indeed break the machine."

Probably because in the early days of £10000+ PC computers bought on the capital budget, the non-IT managers were aware of the value and warned users to never do anything that might damage the shiny new capital investment. Remember, those were the days when eating or drinking near the PC was a severe offence and a £1000 was a LOT of money.

"One also assumes that it is a ball mouse - something unheard of nowadays. (The younger among us will be confused by this story)"

And now that you mention it, all the ball mice I ever used wouldn't work upside down. The ball would drop to the "top" and the friction of that contact would stop it working as a trackball. Probably poor contact with the internal wheels/rollers too,

Astroboffins spy a rare exoplanet evaporating before their eyes

Re: The whole point of the metric system is to make large numbers more ‘palatable’.

"For comparison, the Earth is about 6E21 tonnes, which at a rate of 10kton/sec would be gone in 6E17 seconds, 1.67E14 hours, 19E9 years. Slow enough to not bother me."

Now do the same for the mass of the atmosphere, leaving the rocky bit out of it. Is it a bit more of a worry now? :-)

Postmates plans rollout of autonomous delivery robots in US

"How big are these things? That looks like something you'd trip over. And how is it going to get through my gate and up my steps to my door, and how is it going to ring the doorbell?"

There's probably going to be an app for that, ie let you know it's at the gate.

Re: "headed first to LA"

"Probably that same places that fire their teachers when they give a world geography lesson and mention the Niger River in West Africa... "

Were they pronouncing it wrong? If so, odd considering LA was originally mainly French speaking.

I've always thought it was pronounced Nee-JER, a soft J

Virgin Galactic test flight reaches space for the first time, lugging NASA cargo in place of tourists

Re: Space, not quite as above and beyond as before

"1> Make rocket go higher and cross 100km line

2>Change definition of 'space' to one we can reach

Which did they go for?"

They are going for the 80Km line which by some definitions is space. The 100Km line is usually used as the definition for the edge of the atmosphere. This was a test flight. Also, as noted above, even the ISS has to be nudged back into orbit regularly because even at 400Km, it's subject to a small amount of atmospheric drag.

Re: Terminological inexactitudes

"What achievement? Rockets capable of doing better than this have been in use since at least WW2. Multiple countries routinely launch rockets not just into orbit but to land on other planets, and even private enterprise has started hitting orbit as a matter of routine."

Apart from the Russians and Chinese, no one is offering rides to humans. Those that may do, are not talking about fee paying passengers for anything close to 1/4mill just yet. Yes, it's just a rich mans rollercoaster ride at this stage, but then so were the first cars.

Godmother of word processing Evelyn Berezin dies at 93

Re: Love at first sight

It was a massive, dirty bit of code whose time was right, and we ran with it."

My emphasis. That is the real crux of the matter. As per the article, Wang came out with theirs at about the same time. Another example is the iPod. There were other small, portable MP3 players before the iPod, but with some twewaking, the right marketing, and "the right time", Apple made a killing. There are many examples throughout history, eg use of water and steam power in ancient Greece but since slaves were cheap, who needs complicated powered machinery?

"Ok, then, the first practical and accessible to the masses word processor.

Still, innovation is innovation, and I'll lift a glass up to her tonight. Hail!"

So, like Apple then. Take an existing concept and improve the user interface. Unlike Apple, her business model was to make it better and cheaper, not better and massively more expensive.

No matter, as you say, still a great innovator and worthy of respect.

Re: Bah!

"For those that care, "Hauppage" is pronounced "HOP og" hereaboutswardly."

IIRC the TV card maker pronounces it Haw-Poe-Ghee, but then I'm neither local nor in the US :-)

Home users due for a battering with Microsoft 365 subscription stick

Re: reaction

"ReactOS can't happen soon enough"

It's been happening for years now, and I suspect will never happen in way as to be useful to average users. If if it ever did, the MS lawyers would be unleashed and kill it dead, even if just under the weight of unaffordable legal costs. It's one thing to build a "workalike" from scratch in a "clean" environment, it's quite another to not have the big boys come along and accuse you of copyright infringement on the API definitions and spend years in court battles.

Re: Not Sure

"Once you start adding up all the possible monthly and annual subscriptions you might want to consider which ones are worth keeping."

We're already there with TV. Free broadcast TV, all you can eat. Then subscription cable with premium sports and films as extras. Same on satellite, but some channels exclusive to a platform. Then the likes of Netflix and Amazon. So many subscriptions to so many services, all of which may me carrying something you want, but maybe not enough to justify the expense (or allowed by your budget). Now even the studios are jumping on the bandwagon and starting their own streaming services.

I can understand why these service are taking off in the US, having seen some US commercial TV with ad breaks every 10 minutes, even ads across the bottom of the show taking a 1/4 of the screen for a minute or so after the ad break has finished.

MS are just following the crowd, ads in the OS and apps, and then making you pay for that.

Re: Enterprise...

"And another company makes you book an appointment with a Genius to sit at a table,"

I can make my own tables for free with Libre Office. But I do use a Genius mouse.

Re: Never guessed...

"Eventually, MS will convience OEM's to start distributing PC's with a new 'subscription' version of Windows 10 - at a reduced cost to them no doubt - to try and get consumers used to the idea of paying for Windows monthly. MS will manage most things remotely, further dumbing down the OS, and removing yet more power user features"

Maybe the end game is to supply a "free" WinTerm with every subscription and they get to control everything, including what you are allowed to install on your "PC".

Re: Yes, what MS really needs now is more marketing...

"A whole six users have taken up the Home Edition of the subscription so they call this a success!"

That's double the number of Windows Phone users, so yes, in MS terms that's a huuuuuuge success!!!!

Re: Yes, what MS really needs now is more marketing...

"They are already testing simplified ribbons, it could be all you get in low-end versions."

Most home users don't really need a full fledged office package and many of those who do use MS Office at home are likely using employer supplied or highly discounted educational versions. If the only option becomes a monthly subscription, those home users are going to need something of obvious value for their money if they are not to jump ship to Libre Office/Open Office.

Windows 10 can carry on slurping even when you're sure you yelled STOP!

Re: It is _SO_ like MS and Win-10-nic

"You want it more private? Make it more private."

According to Microsoft, they are "committed to privacy"

Of course, they don't exactly say what they are committed too with regard to privacy. Maybe they mean they are committed to entirely removing the users privacy?

Phew, galactic accident helps boffins explain dark matter riddle

Re: Explains the riddle...?

"An entire galaxy is a pretty big point."

Even an entire galaxy is just a Mote in the Universes Eye.

Equifax how-it-was-mega-hacked damning dossier lands, in all of its infuriating glory

then that system can grind to a halt without anything else caring.

---------------

It does make one wonder who responsible for checking the security monitoring system and why they never wondered about either the complete lack of reports, logs etc. or even why, if reports were being generated, nothing ever happened for 19 months.

An org the size of Equifax should expect to be under constant attack fron multiple sources.

Re: "Such a breach was entirely preventable"

But socialism would prevent such a thing???

---------

If you think socialism is the only alternatuve to the rampant and raw capitalism as practiced in the US, then you need to get out more and see, or at least read about, the rest of the world.

Poor people should get slower internet speeds, American ISPs tell FCC

Re: ISP's don't get it.

Seeing that they owe EVERYTHING they have gained to what they do for people, it is disingenuous for them to complain they have a right to any profit for not doing something that is fundamental to their very existence.

---------------

I once went on a sales course. The instructor said each area owef the company £xxx and it was our job to collect it. I only lasted a week before I found a proper job.

Ending that stupidity would go a long way toward solving these problems, because then we'd be able to get real competition for broadband services.

----------

The greatest and most ardent propents of capitalism and the "free market" seems to be suffering badly from monopolies in most areas and over regulation in a few small pockets.

I wonder if the pockets of over regulation are a backlash against the commetcial monopolies?

It's interesting how free market advocates denigrate Europe as "socialist" (implying communist) and yet in general we don't suffer the same problems.

Re: Municipal cable companies

"And we are not that big - 5600 cable TV subscribers and 4200 internet subscribers."

And yet so-called economies of scale are usually touted by the big boys as reasons they can provide cheaper and better, but can't beacause they are servicing huge debt and executive bonuses.

It the same across all industries. Surely ecomomies of scale dictate Dominoes can sell be a better, cheaper pizza than my local independant but agaon, the reality is the local independant is better and cheaper.

Doom: The FPS that wowed players, gummed up servers, and enraged admins

Re: You got the chainsaw! Find some meat...

Was Sir Pterry not preceded by Jasper Carrot mole hunting at night with a 12 bore?

Moles are evil incarnate!!!!

Ecuador says 'yes' to Assange 'freedom' deal, but Julian says 'nyet'

Re: What will mostly

"In all cases , he'll fight it in the courts as far as he can,"

That's why he jumped bail in the UK. He'd fought it through the courts, losing at every stage and was due a final appearance which he obviously was expecting to lose as well, so he ran away from the consequences of his actions.

Re: Assange is a political prisoner, in the United Kingdom, end of

"Shit my mistake, I of course do not know what I meant, and only you know"

You may well know what you mean. But if you can't communicate your meaning in a reliable and accepted manner, is it any wonder that no one else knows what you mean?

Re: Assange is a political prisoner, in the United Kingdom, end of

"Assange is a political prisoner, in the United Kingdom, end of "

He's not a prisoner, neither political nor otherwise, and never has been. At worst, he was under house arrest in a stately home until he skipped bail and self-imprisoned himself in the embassy.

Re: Assange is a political prisoner, in the United Kingdom, end of

"my reading of the situation is: Moreno would hand Assange over to the British who would extradite Assange to the US with the understanding Assange would not face the death penalty. "

The UK would not extradite him to the US anyway. Sweden has first call on him. If the UK were, for some obscure legal reason, able to skip the Swedes and accede to a US extradition order, it would require the US to guarantee to no death penalty under any circumstances. The US/UK extradition treaty may well be unbalanced in the US favour, but there is no way the UK would extradite to anywhere where the charges could result in the death penalty being applied.

Re: Yes, but you've omitted the most important bit...

"and its not going to be Trump's dong."

Of course not, Trumps dong is already over used fucking over everyone else.

'Say hello to my little vacuum cleaner!' US drug squad puts spycams in cleaner's kit

Pah! Amateurs!

If Q had built this, it would be motorised so it could move, have a pop-out gun, maybe a laser, and a super suck option!

Linux.org domain hacked, plastered with trolling, filth and anti-transgender vandalism

A hijacking, not a hack

The post is required, and must contain letters.

Re: Using Yahoo! mail for something important?

To people outside the world of IT, using a well recognised email address is seen as good. Maybe not quite so much nowadays, but until fairly recently, only the big boys and geeks had domain addresses. I still see signed vans with @aol.co.uk on them too, although these days it tends to sole traders or very small businesses and they've been using that email address for many years. They may even have their own domain and website, but that email address is what everyone knows.

Bloodhound SSC reaches the end of the road for want of £25m

"After all one of the main objectives of the Bloodhound team was to fire up enthusiasm in hi-tech in a potential workforce currently destined for McJobs in the service sector."

The required £25m is probably less than if the Govt. had tried to do the school visits etc that the Bloodhound team already did. The project probably saved the Govt. more than they now need.

Brit bomb hoax teen who fantasised about being a notorious hacker cops 3 years in jail

Re: "...and your motivation of seeking notoriety"

watching the bodycam video of the arrest on the Beeb website, he really didn't seem all that bothered about what was going on.

"I actually think that aspect is really disturbing. While the perpetrator was given a 3 year sentence, in practice in the UK it means that he'll be out again in in 18 months."

I always assumed that the 50% time served was not automatic, but apparently for fixed term sentences of under 4 years, it is. Unless he gets up to some fairly serious bad behaviour inside, then yes, he will serve a maximum of 18 months minus time spent inside on remand. That's really not very long considering the amount of disruption and damage caused and the large number of victims.

Galileo's magnifico measurement: 1976 redshift test updated

All well and good, but...

...what's it for? The article doesn't actually mention any examples of what this greater accuracy does to help us in any other area than "mine is better than yours". I'm sure there are very good reasons for doing this, but it's well out of my field so some hints in the article would have helped.

Expired cert... Really? #O2down meltdown shows we should fear bungles and bugs more than hackers

"The difference is that buses failed safe - the network connections failed, but the buses still ran."

There was a comms failure on our local metro system the other week. Complete shutdown of the system resulted despite the fact there far fewer vehicles involved, no other vehicles other than authorised ones with trained operators, very few junctions, but, no, to be safe, it all has to stop. Could you imagine the reaction of roads being closed because traffic lights failed?

Admittedly, there are stretched os single line operation and even sections where the light rail shares track with main line trains, so I suppose those sections might be more dangerous to operate without comms or signalling.

"But a look in their forums shows tons of people just screaming at them, who didn't even bother reading the news."

How were they supposed to read the news when their phone data connection was down? You don't honestly think they would have something old fashioned like a landline based connection or a radio or even a TV, do you? No, of course not. The world had just ended!

Re: Acronyms

"No, these are all TLAs (Three Letter Acronyms)."

Ok, so what is M2M then? TLAAN? (Two Letters And A Number)

Tech support discovers users who buy the 'sh*ttest PCs known to Man' struggle with basics

"We standardized our network pcs on Macintosh for three reasons: robustness (took 3-4 months in a hellish environment to kill them; PCs lasted weeks);"

You were lucky with that Apple warranty. That sort of environment would normally void any warranty or service contract unless specifically written in and at significant annual cost. I bet the Apple of today wouldn't accept it :-)

"he had a knotty problem with a word document he was writing. He showed me the screen that had a single line of large point text on it,"

Is that even possible on any word processor? A basic plain text editor, maybe, but as far as I can remember, every word processor I ever used going back to Electric Pencil on a TRS-80 in the late 70's would auto-wrap at the end of the line. Had he somehow managed to set the right margin to something insane?

Re: Alternatively...

"Communication skills are key in any walk of life, explaining things is a communications skill we should all practice."

I think he's referring to the fact that the support desk is used a low cost training budget. If the staff are not trained in the first place, then the support staff have to do the training over the phone, on the fly.

Having said that, I did spend 10 years training users across the "PC boundary", ie on CP/M and similar, then through the "IBM PC revolution" and had to become quite adept at analogies because most of the users were coming into IT usage completely "cold". They may have seen blinkenlights and spinning tape drives on TV, or maybe even used a typewriter, but computers? Nope, No experience, no prior knowledge to build on. Sometimes it was tough going, but much of it was dealing with the wonderment many of them experienced :-)

Re: It's 2018

"But guess what he's an auto electrician"

So he only works on old cars then?