* Posts by chivo243

6072 publicly visible posts • joined 10 May 2010

Microsoft whips out tool so you can measure Windows 10's data-slurping creepiness

chivo243 Silver badge
Windows

Just turn it off at Installation

I stopped as much as possible when first configuring windows. The only reason I installed W10 was to be able to support it. I rarely use it for anything other than training purposes. So MS is getting a whole lotta nada from my W10 usage...

Aut-doh!-pilot: Driver jams 65mph Tesla Model S under fire truck, walks away from crash

chivo243 Silver badge

7 Ups!

Reminds me of the scene in the 7 Ups when Roy Schieder crashes under the semi

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LJPSiUj_Abo

cool chase!

29 MEEELLION iPhone Xs flogged... only to be end-of-life'd by summer?

chivo243 Silver badge
Headmaster

Wow, just wow

Gee, this party had to end sometime... and this one's cover price was just a bit to high for most working stiffs

Why did I buy a gadget I know I'll never use?

chivo243 Silver badge
Happy

been bought, borrowed or stolen in the first place

Raises finger, guilty as charged... and yes, I have those bins and boxes under my desk too!

I guess we all need a bigger place for out stuff?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JLoge6QzcGY

User had no webcam or mic, complained vid conference didn’t work

chivo243 Silver badge
Facepalm

Your Network is broken!

Long ago, we had a consultant come, he sat down at a PC logged in with a guest account, inserted his floppy with his presentations etc... He stormed into our office complaining that out network is broken and really sucked. Dumb looks all around! He said his floppy wasn't being read correctly, that our PC wouldn't open his files. But it worked at home! I returned to the PC with the consultant in tow. There were dozens of dialog boxes searching for the files, remember win 98 and the little flashlight? I closed all of them, and went into the 3.5" drive and saw a dozen icons for files. All 1kb! He couldn't understand that he created shortcuts to the files on his computer and that it wouldn't work on our computer...

Baywatch hero drone saves silly struggling swimmers Down Under from going down under

chivo243 Silver badge
Paris Hilton

Walks like a duck?

@AC

I thought the same thing when I watched the vid yesterday elsewhere... But then read that they were to demo it later in the day? I wonder if this was just part of the demo? A little advance publicity?

Quack!

Butt plugs, mock cocks, late pay and paranoia: The world of Waymo star Anthony Levandowski… by his kids' nanny

chivo243 Silver badge
Paris Hilton

Re: I always thought a ball gag

@TrumpSlurp the Troll

+1 is not enough!

Baby's got back is an understatement!

Cue Sir Mix a Lot!

Paris is a close as icons here at El Reg get to KK

chivo243 Silver badge

Where is the Mom\Mrs?

Didn't catch that in the article?

Who's using 2FA? Sweet FA. Less than 10% of Gmail users enable two-factor authentication

chivo243 Silver badge
Childcatcher

right or left

2fA is not that hard. I use SMS and also have 10 count them 10 codes on paper (kept secure) I can use with there is no cell\mobile coverage. But, I would imagine, the 10% who do, actually might have something in their account to secure. Good on them ;-}

UK's Just Eat faces probe after woman tweets chat-up texts from 'delivery guy'

chivo243 Silver badge
Facepalm

I feel sorry for the Customer Advisor

Trixie, if that's her real name, is only following a script written by some midlevel monkey. She probably got a demerit for upping the refund as well.

And to be fair, as this is an out of the ordinary issue, the customer advisors probably didn't have training or a script to cover this eventually.

Hawaiian fake nukes alert caused by fat-fingered fumble of garbage GUI

chivo243 Silver badge
Holmes

Re: Why the FCC is involved?

This looks to be a matter that should be handled well above Pai's head.

Aren't most matters over his head?

BOFH: Buttock And Departmental Defence ... As A Service

chivo243 Silver badge
Paris Hilton

Re: And nobody checked

And nobody checked

Everyone present _assumed_ he had two buttocks, but nobody checked.

And nobody checked

Everyone present _assumed_ he had two buttocks, butt nobody checked.

better?

chivo243 Silver badge
Thumb Up

PA Named Rita!

We had one long ago, she retired, but if you needed to know anything about anybody anytime... Ask Rita!

She is missed ;-}

Self-driving cars still do not exist even if we think they do

chivo243 Silver badge

parallel parking

I'll parallel park your car for a fiver! I am totally amazed by how many people can't - or do it so poorly that it looks like they have abandoned their car...

PowerShell comes to MacOS and Linux. Oh and Windows too

chivo243 Silver badge

MS Smells Coffee

MS Maturing these days? Realizing that they have to work with the rest of the tech world in order to stay relevant?

Seems this article might reignite some of the old and forgotten flame wars the article below says are gone?

https://www.theregister.co.uk/2018/01/12/end_of_the_tech_religious_wars/

Heart of darkness: Inside the Osówka underground city

chivo243 Silver badge

Outsourcing

(according to the guide, the Third Reich was not above a bit of outsourcing).

Too true. When I was a child, we had Greek neighbors, one of their uncles was trained as a welder by the Nazis. He was quite good too. He cut two Fiat X19s apart and welded the front end onto the other back end. It was a thing of beauty, it drove down the road straight as an arrow...

Apple, quit milking tech-addicted fruit of our loins – shareholders

chivo243 Silver badge
Headmaster

Well Duh

It's shiny, it makes noise, it vibrates, kids will love it...

You're the parent... Who's in charge? I know my niece has had her iThingy taken away( a week or more) on numerous occasions for not doing what her mother asked...

While I applaud someone(or groups) thinking of the children, the children's parents should be thinking first, not crying foul when they've lost control of their children due to iThingy addiction.

Pedant as he looks as clueless as some parents...

Apple macOS so secure some apps can't be easily deleted

chivo243 Silver badge
Holmes

no longer a computing company

Apple is now a consumer company... Tim is milking the company. What are Vegas odds that he will be parachuting onto his private island by 2020?

That was fast... unlike old iPhones: Apple sued for slowing down mobes

chivo243 Silver badge

Late to the party

Tail between their legs? At least it seems so for Apple - Slashed battery replacement prices? I'm shocked, really!

https://www.reuters.com/article/us-apple-batteries/apple-apologizes-after-outcry-over-slowed-iphones-idUSKBN1EM20N?feedType=RSS&feedName=newsOne

https://www.apple.com/iphone-battery-and-performance/

'Please store the internet on this floppy disk'

chivo243 Silver badge
Happy

reminds me of the joke

Downloading the internet, disk c: is almost full, please insert floppy into drive a: to continue

Once had a user said the downloaded google, and it didn't work anymore... My reply was:

"It was you!!? Google just called! Don't empty your trash!

Yes, your old iPhone is slowing down: iOS hits brakes on CPUs as batteries wear out

chivo243 Silver badge

@ Truckle

A colleague of mine replaced his iPhone battery, and could not believe the improvement.

YMMV

Oh, the weather outside is frightful, but the data centre temp's delightful

chivo243 Silver badge

Airco out

40c in the server room. I could hear the disks and fans screaming in the corridor before entering the server room. We also opened windows, used fans and opened the side panels of the racks.

Airco pump didn't want to play nicely ;-/

HMS Queen Elizabeth has sprung a leak and everyone's all a-tizzy

chivo243 Silver badge
Coat

Optional El Reg measure?

Nobody?

Kettle is the best you can do? No bulgarian air bags?

Sex robot forum venue 'encrypted in a poem'

chivo243 Silver badge
Trollface

Cue My Marilyn Monrobot

Just think, hardly anyone going outside, way fewer couples having kids...

Now who will tell to get off my lawn?

Kent woman to season festive dinner with her mother's ashes

chivo243 Silver badge
Windows

Invite Keith Richards?

He'd be the life of the party!

https://www.theguardian.com/uk/2007/apr/04/drugsandalcohol.musicnews

So what happened with the patent judge and the Euro Patent Office?

chivo243 Silver badge
Facepalm

Re: How has he survived?

@Potemkine!

Face it, this guy is a turd, my friends at the EPO will attest to this (two in Rijswijk, and one in Munich), examiners of 15-20 years are considering taking an early retirement as the work environment is toxic, that puts it mildly...

chivo243 Silver badge
Facepalm

It's the But... but... but... defense

We're an international org, your laws aren't applicable... Wait while I update our side of the story(behind closed doors). Wait while I make up the new rules, which, by chance don't apply to us, only you...

chivo243 Silver badge
Coat

Re: How has he survived?

so, they're not cheese eating surrender monkeys? Who'da thunk it?

Yes, there is cheese in my pocket ;-}

Put down the eggnog, it's Patch Tuesday: Fix Windows boxes ASAP

chivo243 Silver badge
Headmaster

Re: IE and Edge - Forgot a word!

I thought it was built from the ground up? What a pile of shit.

I thought it was built from the ground up? What a steaming pile of shit.

The eagle has been grounded: Dutch anti-drone squadron retired

chivo243 Silver badge
Facepalm

From the beginning

Just a Bird Brained idea... chaaaw!

Millions of moaners vindicated: Man flu is 'a thing', says researcher, and big TVs are cure

chivo243 Silver badge
Thumb Up

Re: Man Flu - banter OK but no balance

@A Non e-mouse

A sane viewpoint if I've ever seen one. I am one colleague who was collateral damage due to other colleagues who wouldn't stay home when they were sick.

YouTuber cements head inside microwave oven

chivo243 Silver badge

Tuber for a brain?

Mr. Potatohead? Naah, he's got more brains...

Disk drive fired 'Frisbees of death' across data centre after storage admin crossed his wires

chivo243 Silver badge

The Cube

sounds like this contraption is a mini Cube...

OK Google: A stranger with stash of pirated films is spamming my Google Team Drive

chivo243 Silver badge
Pirate

Re: More importantly...

@rmason

Nicely done +1 would give more...

'Drunk' developers delay software vendor's release

chivo243 Silver badge
Pirate

@ Phil Kingston

you seem to have forgotten your icon ;-} Haar!

O Christmas wreath, O Christmas wreath, thy potent skunk's in bunches

chivo243 Silver badge
Angel

Well versed

The author seems to quite a bit about some of the designer strains... (best Arte Johnson) interesting,

very interesting ;-}

Quentin Tarantino in talks to make Star Trek movie

chivo243 Silver badge
Coat

Re: My first thought for casting was Samuel Jackson as the baddie

@ Voland's right hand

My first thought was a vulcan's ear... just because ferengi came later...

My coat, I think you can guess what is in the pocket.

Brit MP Dorries: I gave my staff the, um, green light to use my login

chivo243 Silver badge
Trollface

I would hate to shake hands

with one of these wankers... really, that's all they do is shake hand with people...

WW2 Enigma machine to be seized from shamed pharma bro Shkreli

chivo243 Silver badge
Holmes

Securities fraud...

No "Big House" with violent criminals for this guy, he'll end up at a min sec resort with his own kind, pity really. I'm sure there is a tattooed giant in the big house who has needs.

User dialled his PC into a permanent state of 'Brown Alert'

chivo243 Silver badge

Re: USB mice are fun...

I remember an intern fighting with a mouse of the usb flavor on our old NT4.0 server !

Foil snack food bags make a decent Faraday cage, judge finds

chivo243 Silver badge

Re: Cheetohs?

@ Huw D

Chester is grateful...

Russia threatens to set up its 'own internet' with China, India and pals – let's take a closer look

chivo243 Silver badge

Re: Russia threatens to set up its 'own internet'...

@malle-herbert

Forget the blackjack!

Lauri Love appeal: 'If he's dead, no victim's going to get anything'

chivo243 Silver badge

As in most cases

“The United States is a nation of laws, badly written and randomly enforced.”

― Frank Zappa

Extradition treaties just make this infinitely worse.

Maybe some minister can have a word with the Trumpster and get the charges dropped... Ya know, like the Trumpster did in China :-/

Pro tip: You can log into macOS High Sierra as root with no password

chivo243 Silver badge
Meh

Only if....

You have enabled root previously. Root account should not be enabled in macOS.

Consider enabling root to be like jailbreaking or rooting your android. all bets are off? No?

Tesla reveals a less-long-legged truck, but a bigger reservation price

chivo243 Silver badge
Meh

Founders Edition

Sounds like a lemon already.

BOFH: The trouble with, er, windows installs

chivo243 Silver badge
Thumb Up

that's one way to mire the project!

"And that's a tricky one - because on the one hand we're trying to encourage BYOD so that staff don't use their home machines for personal stuff but on the other hand we're also trying to ensure the inherent safety of our systems."

Dazzled with brilliance or baffled with BS, that'll keep the project in neutral...

Boss made dirt list of minions' mistakes, kept his own rampage off it

chivo243 Silver badge
Headmaster

aren't all bosses exempt?

Just remember, do as I say, not as I do, damn it...

FCC boss Ajit Pai emits his net neutrality extermination plan

chivo243 Silver badge
Black Helicopters

Re: Well you voted for Trump...

The Clinton moral values are top notch too... i'm not a Trump endorser by any stretch of the imagination either. Basically the American people were screwed no matter what. Big business is in bed with the politicians. I'll let you connect the rest of the dots in this sordid picture.

Aussie Catholic School forced into hasty cover-up over suggestive Saint

chivo243 Silver badge
Coat

Sense of humor

Really, this is funny from an order to production standpoint:

Buyer: Here is a photo of a picture of him giving bread

Middle man: Yes, yes, next?

Sculptor: If that's what the customer wants....

Either that, or someone along the line has a *cough* sense of humor...

'Gimme Gimme Gimme' Easter egg in man breaks automated tests at 00:30

chivo243 Silver badge
Trollface

Abba?

Surely it's Black Flag all the way! No?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=40TD4v0jCAc