* Posts by Locky

554 publicly visible posts • joined 7 Apr 2010


Vote now on who should take the lead in Musk: The Movie


Donald Duck?

Shirley his uncle Scrooge would be more fitting, he already has the swimming pool full of cash

Microsoft calls time on Windows Insider MVP program


MVP gripe


You know what really grinds my gears, the MVP acronym. Why would we have something with 2 interchangeable solutions that are the direct opposite of each other.

Is this the greatest thing ever, or the cut to the bone so much it wont work at all, who knows?

/end rant

Boston Dynamics teaches robo-dog to recognise speech, respond using ChatGPT



Justify your existence, you have 20 seconds to comply

Down and out: Barclays Bank takes unplanned digital detox, customers not invited


Re: Starling

+1 for Starling, all my DDs got moved without a hitch, and having multiple virtual cards for different pots of cash is great

High severity vuln in WinRAR could allow code to run when files are opened


Both the licensed users will be furious




You look at the figure. He is carrying a roll of carpet and some quicklime


I'm sorry Dave, I cannot do that

Quirky QWERTY killed a password in Paris


I had this problem. Someone had installed the French default language onto the on-site server, making the admin password go from complex to insane

'Joan Is Awful' Black Mirror episode rebounds on Netflix


Re: Black mirror: it's either genuine over-the-top woke-ness or parody

So someone who grew up in the 70's, "occasional nun, pregnant woman, or alcoholic priest" pretty much describes my years in catholic education

BOFH: Cough up half a grand and we'll protect you from AI


I imagine it would be difficult to get a new role with "Inappropriate CPR" on your HR record

Can noise-cancelling buds beat headphones? We spent 20 hours flying to find out


Re: Aeropex works great for outside

Mine are so old they are still called Aftershokz. 8 years on and I wouldn't get on a bike without them

BOFH takes a visit to retro computing land


Environmentally Responsibility

Much easier in the old days, it just mea.....

.. is that a fax cable for a Nokia E90?

Techie sacked after jetting to tropical island on sick leave


Harsh, he followed doctors orders

But failed to get his ears syringed while he was there.

Dr said, "Get some bed rest"

He heard, "Get sun bed rest"

Easy mistake to make

BOFH: We send a user to visit Kelvin – Keeper of the Batteries



Autocorrect should meet an old colleague of mine, SMTP Relay. He was known to have a love of just forwarding emails.

I think they'd get on

Three seconds of audio could end up costing Fox $500,000


Re: Harmony by disharmony

Prior art klaxon - Dinosaurs Will Die by NoFx

City council cans ERP project, keeps details of replacement supplier secret


New supplier

As a current creditor of funds to Leeds CC's coffers and knowing how much they have spare at the moment for essential services, I expect the new service will be Excel, supplied by Fag Packet Designs plc

For password protection, dump LastPass for open source Bitwarden


+1 for Vaultwarden

A thread here pointed me towards it at some point and my Pi Zero hasn't looked back since.

Hourly backups to my OneDrive and dynamic DNS updates incase the ISP decides to change my IP are a few of the add-ons I've thrown in.

At some point someone will break into BitWardens service ala LastPass problems, but they are much less likely to find mine on a random ip. And if the vulnerabilities don't get patched I can export my data and import into a n other service.

John Deere signs right to repair agreement with US ag lobbyists


Add your own Paris icon here ->

Just a quick FYI for any Members of Parliament reading this;

This is not porn. I know there can be some confusion over the two for you

Server installer fails to spot STOP button – because he wasn't an archaeologist


We used to have the aircon control system next to the light switch, which had a similar effect to a stop button, but with the added fun of a delay.

Greater London wing of comms union urges BT workers to reject pay offer


Nothing is optional

Isn't "falls way short of your expectations" BT's brand tagline?

New measurement alert: Liz Truss inspires new Register standard


Re: Incorrect measurement

She also had 10 days in mourning, so is a Truss 34 days active service?

Ransomware gang threatens 1m-plus medical record leak



Those who the most vulnerable trust their data with haven't secured it adequately..

California to try tackling drought with canal-top solar panels


Re: 13GW

Already being done


LastPass source code, blueprints stolen by intruder


Alexia, how do I migrate from LastPass to BitWarden?

Cloudflare: Someone tried to pull the Twilio phishing tactic on us too


Re: Am I missing something ?

Indeed TOTP systems are a pretty poor second factor.

While timed 2FA codes aren't perfect, they are a step up

Slack leaked hashed passwords from its servers for years


Dónde está Paris?

Slack, a tool promoted by Marketing departments for years because "it bypasses all those pesky IT rules and just works", is insecure?

I am shocked

Your job was probably outsourced for exactly the reason you suspected


Outsourcing problems are generally in house

I've been involved in a number of outsourcing programmes and they have all fallen apart because the old in-house teams had the undocumented knowledge.

Management are sold the dream that an off shore team can do the same job as the more expensive incumbent, and they probably could. But changing an entire team all at the same time without every single process fully documented down to the smallest keypress is going to cause problems.

The depth of the knowledge gap is generally only found once the original teams have been let go and the first big change fails to make it's mark and only then does the value of constancy become apparent. The outsourcers will deliver what they promised, but what is often missed is that the terms of a contract is the maximum you will receive, not the minimum

Investment firm KKR buys Barracuda Networks


Management speak

For "a tremendous opportunity for long-term growth" read "sweat the assets"

BOFH: You drive me crazy... and I can't help myself


Re: Been there and *redacted* that

I used to work for a company that Avaya acquired. This doesn't surprise me at all.

We also had the 0208 numbers where the corresponding 0207 ones were Scotland Yard Special Branch. I had some amazing wrong number confessions

To CAPTCHA or not to CAPTCHA? Gartner analyst says OK — but don’t be robotic about it




Ex-Geeks staff lose legal bid to claw back withheld training costs from final paycheques


I'd challenge the Director Cost

So making them pay for their mentor, I guess that's "reasonable", but the director is protecting the corportate image, not training the newbie.

I would have retorted that the Director is actually training the mentor for things he should have picked up initially

UK Test and Trace chief Dido Harding tries to convince MPs that £14m for canned mobile app was money well spent


She's no angel

Yes, it's down again: Microsoft's Office 365 takes yet another mid-week tumble, Azure also unwell


Re: Do you remember?

It almost like all IT projects are either centralisation or decentralisation, and all we do is move the "You are here" arrow between the two...

He was a skater boy. We said, 'see you later, boy' – and the VAX machine mysteriously began to work as intended


The need for speed

Reminds me of something a old BOFH told me back in PFY days.

In terms of the cost of DR, never underestimate the cost saving a speeding techie with a boot load of DLT tapes in their car.

IBM job ad calls for 12 years’ experience with Kubernetes – which is six years old


Re: And so it ever was.

The change HR did affected your job, you are effected

Things can't go on like this. You need to get fit for the sake of your health. I'm going to write you a prescription for... an e-bike


I concur. A e-bike may be a gateway to the patent taking up normal cycling but didn't because of the initial fitness barrier. Could be interesting to see how this pans out.

Of course, if half of them get nicked or end up in a canal because the owner doesn't care for them as much as they would it the asset was their own it would be particularly good value for money.

Health Sec Hancock says UK will use Apple-Google API for virus contact-tracing app after all (even though Apple were right rotters)


Re: with respect to the UK app

But they are already all millionaires....

Google productises its own not-a-VPN secure remote access tool


Zero Trust and Google

Yup, checks out

Apple creates face shield for health workers, resists the temptation to call it the 'iMask'


There's a "You're wearing it wrong" joke in here, I'm sure of it...

VMware plans to give vSphere power to automatically patch everything running in a VM


Old functionallity

Back in the good old days of vSphere3, Update Manager used to be able to apply Windows updates to VMs, until MS gave them a cease and desist.

Feels like a long time ago now, but so does February

Zoom's end-to-end encryption isn't actually end-to-end at all. Good thing the PM isn't using it for Cabinet calls. Oh, for f...


They should ditch Zoom

Houseparty is what all the cool kids are using these days

If there's a bustle in your hedgerow, don't be alarmed now: Brexit tea towel says it'll just be the gigabit broadband


Re: Since when did a hedgerow need gigabit broadband?

Pwooor, look at them tits

Private equity ponies up £2m to help launch satellites from sunny Shetland by next year


Re: Ideal

Oh course it's ideal, being the one of the most northerly points of the UK it's closer to space, and so will save on fuel.


BOFH: Darn Windows 7. It's totally why we need a £1k graphics card for a business computer


Hardware drivers, BIOS handshaking, flux capacitor decoupling

That exactly the point we're at in our W10 project too

LastPass stores passwords so securely, not even its users can access them


Me to, with thanks to the commentards here for the recommendation of Bitwarden

Totally Subcontracted Business: TSB to outsource entire IT estate to IBM for a cool $1bn after 2019 meltdown


Re: Still a TSB Customer? WHY?

First Direct. I know it's technically HSBC, but at least the call centre staff are polite to you when they have IT issues.

BOFH: You brought nothing to the party but a six-pack of regret


Priority calling at Samaritans

That's my "not laughing at jokes that will send me to hell" resolution broken then

Windows 7 and Server 2008 end of support: What will change on 14 January?


Re: We still need a name for this

Oh no, not again

Log us out: Private equity snaffles Lastpass owner LogMeIn


Re: Google

Icon requires correction...

Canada's .ca supremo in hot water after cyber-smut stash allegedly found on his work Mac ‒ and three IT bods fired


Re: Do you think

"When in this situation, either quit or call a lawyer"

Which is probably what they did. The fact that they all had to sign an NDA to keep their severance suggests they got the best they could. If they didn't follow company procedures by involving HR, they would have not even got this and would have been hung out to dry.

HR kept the damage costs to a minimum by removing the lowest paid problem

Following the wild, roaring success of its Snapdragon 8cx Arm laptop chip, Qualcomm's back with the 8c, 7c


It's a very functional tool

But what is she going to do with that pickaxe?