Posts by Jim jimminy jim jim jim jim

Boffins claim Voyager has already left the Solar System

Carbon Units

This Carbon Unit for one will quietly await V'gers return to be dealt with by Kirk, Spock et al

Doctor Who? 12th incarnation sought after Matt Smith quits

Re: Fountain of Youth

or Jaden Pinkett-Smith. just as long as his Dad gets a cameo & Jaden gets to say "oh hell no!"

sorry, mines the one with the soon to be out of date sonic screwdriver in the pocket

Office Software Checkpoint

To Office or not to Office

Personally i used the Mac Office equivalent iWork for quite a while at home, whilst using Office at work. I found shortcomings in the iWork product in compatibility between it & different variants of Office, and so I took out an Office 365 subscription trial & installed it on my mac. not looked back since.

Weary quid-a-day nosh hack fears colonal mass ejection

Re: Eat charcoal

I don't agree.

I have been eating charcoal for years - it's what SWMBO calls "food"

and it does not diminish the amount of flatulence I produce

Thousands rally behind teen girl cuffed, expelled in harmless 'explosion'

Re: ah, schoolday 'pranks'

I refuse to comment on what we, as enterprising and resourceful boys got up to in the countryside around our school with sugar, weedkiller & jetex. it has nothing to do with deforming the terrain around a local brook, not the unusual disappearance of a footbridge....

Re: unintended f*c*i*g consequences.

full fat coke will not incur any penalty however ;)

Reg readers brew up the ultimate cuppa

cuppa time

can't brew this

sorry!

Man rummaging for lost laptop in skip gets tipped into garbage truck

Can someone please

Send Simon on an English comprehension and spelling course?

Also the ability to proof read your work before submitting it may be of benefit.

apart from that, what sort of ninny goes dumpster diving for their laptop when the bin men are coming?

Teacher investigated over mysluttyteacher smut site

Surely

"Maths: Compute how long she is going down for."

would also apply for sex ed....

yeah i know, coat is already on....

Japan develops powered armour suit for nuke workers

Can i be the first to say Space marines? ... awesome!

El Reg in email address blunder

you need to type more carefully, you put the 0 in the wrong place....

Gutsy golf-club granny collars crim in Flying Squad bust

SuperGran!

it has to be done - apologies

Stand back Superman, Iceman, Spiderman. Batman and Robin too

Don’t wanna cause a fracas, but BA Baracas, have I got a match for you.

She makes them look like a bunch of fairies.

She’s got more bottle than United Dairies.

Hang about - Look out! For Supergran.

Defendant presents Playmobil rendering of court in court

"The Vassallo trial comes a couple of years after two Maltesers were accused of selling stolen Playmobil figures, some of them modified to show "knights holding decapitated bleeding heads and arrows lodged in the heads"."

I can't wait to see the playmobil representation of a couple of chocolate confections trying to sell playmobil....

PETA to launch .xxx smut site 'to help animals'

PETA porn

Am I the only one thinking "oh god not another Animal farm"

mines the dirty mac with suspect stains on it, ta

Moderatrix kisses the Reg goodbye

Ave! duci novo, similis duci seneci

I for one welcome our new Dominatrix overlord (or lady)

Anonymous claims LulzSec merger

er

Romans go the house?

Judge Dredd returns to the silver screen

I liked the 1995 version also

I liked the lawmasters, loved the land rovers, thought the angel gang was well portrayed (with the exception of fink, needs more fink angel IMO) and loved the fact that of all the Judges uniforms, Dredd's was the only one that resembled the original comic (seriously, Joe Dredd's uniform was the only one to have the eagle as one of the pauldrons) as has been noted though one of the problems was stallone/assante as twins, the other was McGruder being slaughtered by rico before she was Chief Judge, but let's not let that get in the way of a good story :)

Teen's mobe loaded with X-rated smut

coventry 18yo girl shocked at porn

is it me or does this smack of being a premature april fool?