* Posts by Dances With Sheep

68 publicly visible posts • joined 9 Mar 2010


Don't be a DDoS dummy: Patch your NTP servers, plead infosec bods

Dances With Sheep

drop NTP on your border

Really ?

The NTP protocal works better (more robust, more acurate) the more individual servers participate. As long as you are fully patched, running a public NTP server (or joining pool.ntp.org) is good karma and a polite thing to do.

No need to throw the baby out with the bath water.

Ten classic electronic calculators from the 1970s and 1980s

Dances With Sheep

Re: Still use fx-7000

My fx-7000G is just to the right of my mouse as I'm typing this :-)

It's been in use daily since my GCSE days mumble years ago. I think I'd be stuffed without it.

(And yes, batteries can be made to last by turning down the contrast)

Oh no, RBS has gone titsup again... but is it JUST BAD LUCK?

Dances With Sheep

Re: Oh yeah!

First rule of coding init....

"Never test for an error condition you don't know how to handle" ;-)

'MacGyver' geezer makes 'SHOTGUN, GRENADE' from airport shop tat

Dances With Sheep

Re: Theater, indeed

S'wot happend in 2007


However, fortunately in this case, the terrorists were very inept........

Firstly in managing to set themselves on fire

Secondly, in choosing Scotland as a target.

Que an irate Glaswegen shouting "fuckin mon then" and kicking said terrorist in the love spuds.

3D printing: 'Third industrial revolution' or a load of old cobblers?

Dances With Sheep

Ho Hum

In our workship, we've only used the 3D printer for printing many model Yoda's when we were stonned.

Your millage may vary.

Brit ISPs ordered to add more movie-streaming websites to block list

Dances With Sheep

Don't even need to find a proxy

Opera users can just turn on 'opera turbo'.


Dances With Sheep

> Hangovers and drunk sick are healthy responses that go a long way in teaching you how not to kill yourself

Really ?

In that case, I suggest recreating the effects of a hangover by drinking a thimble full of washing up liquid and banging your head agaisnt a wall a few times.

'I WAS AN ADMIN FOR SILK ROAD': Alleged hit-man target tells all

Dances With Sheep
Black Helicopters

Re: You Lose Sympathy...

> When you decide to get greedy and flip a kilo of coke.

He got greedy?

Or more likely, he did $SOMETHINGSTUPID and 1000g a metric shitload of cocaine turned up on his own fucking door step with the FBI's postage stamps on it and all evidence pointing to him.

He's now facing the rest of his life in prison (thankyou WOD). Of course he is gonna sing like a canary to the FBI and make out his life was at risk. They now have a perfect witness willing to say anything.

Sorry mate, but the truith is the first casualty in this story.

NO! Radio broadcasters snub 'end of FM' DAB radio changeover

Dances With Sheep

Re: Technoluddites

> I never understand the complete opposition to the new that we invariably see here

Because DAB is shite.

* Low bitrate

* Eats batteries (AC power or car power essential)

* Poor signal in large parts of UK, signal also prone to breakup

* Few advantages over internet radio

FM radio offers very good quality audio with low power consumption.

DAB obviously has more choice of decent music stations. But then so does the internet.

Also, there is a lot to be said for a basic low-powered radio service as a backup for when the shit hits the fan.

Drugs e-souk Silk Road back from the dead with new Dread Pirate Roberts

Dances With Sheep

Re: I don't think so

The reason for Silk Roads popularity was that not every 'buddy down the street' sells pure stuff.

For example, the feedback system of Silk Road helped geeks to buy safe(er), pure MDMA disco biscuts, and not potentially dangerous PMA.

Anybody who joined the Fellowship Of The Weed could find a nice mellow smoke (a variety of sativas and indicas with varying THC & CBD levels) rather than the "two-tokes-and-you're-wasted" stuff sold for maximum proffit by many street dealers.

Big Beardie's watching: Alan Sugar robots spy on Tesco petrol queue

Dances With Sheep

I can beat that....

> Even have Tesco staff tell me it was illegal to wear a helmet while paying for petrol.

I walked in to pay for petrol and was asked to remove my crash helmet.

"Oh, why", I asked quite inocently.

"Elf in safety" replied the fuckwit.

Need an internet antidote? Try magic mushrooms

Dances With Sheep

Fly Agaric

> Careful with the Fly Agaric, I believe they need to be dried out correctly or they can make you pretty poorly

Is correct.

Even if dried out properly, you will likely have an upset gut. Other 'shrooms are prefered.

Safety note: Always save a sample of any wild mushroom you eat. This might not be of any use at the hospital, but at least they will know what to put on the death certificate :-)

Obama to Merkel: No Americans are listening to you on this call

Dances With Sheep

Re: But surely Germany...

> So what does the Bundesnachrichtendienst (the German foreign intelligence agency) do, then?

Kindly re-read what I wrote above :-)

Do the Bundesnachrichtendienst spy on friendly allies ? Unlikely.

And if they did get cought doing it, the German public would not be impressed at all. Not one bit.

I base my observations on working in Germany for a few years. Perhaps anybody else who has worked there or is German themselves would care to comment?

Dances With Sheep

Re: Merkel's crocodile tears.

> GERMANY is the No. 1 intercept country for Russia and Eastern European countries

Russia is hardly a friendly neghbour.

The US and Germany are supposed to be friends and allies.

That is why people are outraged.

Dances With Sheep

Re: But surely Germany...

> But surely Germany is spying on American


Y'see, you have to understand the Germans.

Have a few pints together and inevitably they will nearly all tell you the same thing.

It. Must. Not. Happen. Again.

In being accepted back into the "international community" the Germans have always been very, very careful to try to be whiter than white, and aviod pissing off others. It is unthinkable to the average German bloke in the street that they would spy on allies....... Even if it did happen, the German public would be outraged.

Not everybody has the same attitude to friends as the biggest bully in the room, the US of A.

(Would any Germans kindly care to comment on what I have written above?)

Dances With Sheep
Big Brother


But shirly....

If Angela Merkel has nothing to hide, then she has nothing to fear. ;-)

Man facing rare refusal-to-unlock-encryption charge: Court date set

Dances With Sheep
Big Brother

Re: RIP act?

the government assured us that it would only be used against terrorists.

Terrorists ?

It's used by local councils to snoop on school catchment areas and people not cleaning up dog shit.


Dances With Sheep

Re: Making a stand.... or just thick ?

" You do realise that telling plod you "forgot" your password still counts as "failing to disclose the password" under the RIPA legislation. "

My understanding is that there has never been a prosecution for 'forgetting' a password.

There have only been prosecutions for outright refusal.

If you can find a reference otherwise, I am very willing to be proven wrong.

I'd suggest that the courts know that trying to prosecute somebody for forgetting something is a potential minefield. Maybe even enough to call the act into question.

Dances With Sheep

Making a stand.... or just thick ?


Even under RIP, you can tell plod you have "forgotten" your pass-phrase and there isn't too much they or a jury can infer.

By saying to plod "I'm not telling" he is either making a stand to get RIP struck down (and has very big, hairy balls indeed), or he is a bit thick and has had crap legal advice.

Prace bets now.

LAST EVER British typewriter manufactured in Wales

Dances With Sheep
Black Helicopters

Re: and no more secure then than today

I learnt to type at school on a manual typewriter (it beated doing extra-French back in 1990).

As part of the exam, us budding audio-secretaries had to explain why it was important to lock the typewriter ribbons (and dictaphone tapes) in the office safe at the end of the day.

It seams they did think about data security back then. :-)

Mmm, what's that smell: Coffee or sweat? How to avoid a crap IT job

Dances With Sheep

Re: Free coffee

No tea ?

Fucking heathens.

Universal Credit dole 'liable to be paralysed by IT cockups'

Dances With Sheep

unable to use it

Unable to use it more like.

I spent a year as a dole monkey {1} and met plenty of people desperate to find work, but unfortunately not very bright. Not bright enough to use the intertubes at any rate.

The other biggie?

People obviously unemployable due to serious alcohol / drug problems were being sent on training courses to learn "new skills"....... Because when you are "in training" you don't count as unemployed on government statistics. A waste of the instructors time & government money.

{1} With a physics PhD. Go figure.

UK man to spend year in the clink for Facebook account hack

Dances With Sheep

Re: 12 months porridge for a FB 'hack'?


Christ. Assuming concurrent sentencing, you might as well give the copper bringing you in a kick in the bollocks and get your monies worth.

Virgin Media cuts Pirate Bay access for millions of punters

Dances With Sheep

Re: No, You need to get real.

"But it's still theft."

Repeat after me:

"Copyright infringement is not theft'.

If I steal something from you, you no longer have it.

If I *copy* something from you, you still have it.

Maybe you have trouble understanding the concept of a copy?

Dances With Sheep

Re: A sad day

"Ordinary' people will become familiar with using proxies"

Proxies ?

Is that a bit like using google translate then?

A bit like translating a "forbidden' website from Esperanto to English and ignoring the warning that the original wasn't in Esperanto?

Cool. :-)

So, what IS the worst film ever made?

Dances With Sheep

> Highlander II

You utter bastard.

I thought I had banished that abortion of a film from my memory.

... you have reminded me of the lowest point of the 1990's. A sequel so shite it makes the Matrix II look like Citizen Kane by comparison.

Oz anti-gang law hits email, maybe torrents too

Dances With Sheep

Re: mad max

Dude, I've been to Australia......

Mad Max wasn't a film. It was a documentary.

Dances With Sheep

Re: "Defendants will now have to disprove that they..."

Don't forget....... you can't prove a negative.

Changing room spy cam sparks privacy tsar blast

Dances With Sheep

Never mind HongKong. Wot about the bogs in UK pubs?

I've noticed pubs here in Blightly putting spy cams in the mens bogs.

Ten years ago, you wouldn't have believed it would you?

....and before you ask, when one of us comes back from a scoot and gives a positive perv-cam report, we make a point of drinking elsewhere. (Not that the teenaged bar staff GAF about what we do)

Hold on a sec - leap seconds granted a last-minute reprieve

Dances With Sheep

How much would it cost us to change the laws of physics?

Profs call for harsh taxes on sweet carbonated beverages

Dances With Sheep

We know better than you

> "We know better than you" nanny-isms coming from these self-righteous medical researchers.

I hate to say it, but those self-righteous medical researchers actually DO know better than you. (Since I take it you don’t have a medical degree?).

They have given genuine scientific advice ("corn syrup is bad m'kay "). On an individual level, you are free to ignore this if you wish. On a national level, you can vote for a government that either takes or ignores scientific advice.

*cough* EcstasyIsSaferThanHorseRiding *cough*

I'm just sayin' :-)

Too rude for the road: DVLA hot list of banned numberplates

Dances With Sheep

Dyslexia ?

I have a rare form of Dyslexia where all private number plates appear as " fuckwit ".

Does anybody else have the same?

Google will ignore your Wi-Fi router ... if you rename it

Dances With Sheep

A much better idea

I named my Wi-Fi "Police Surveillance Van 2"

That should keep my pikey neighbors on their toes.

Why your tech CV sucks

Dances With Sheep

Mobile Phone Number ?

"Why do you send your CV to me with no mobile phone number? "

Is he taking the piss?

Who the fuck is going to give a mobile phone number so you can call me at my current place of employment or when I'm sat on the bog? You get a home landline (with voice-mail) and a private email address sunshine.

If you think you need to contact me instantly, right this minute..... you don't. Any company I will work for isn't shitting themselves trying to employ the first person they can phone in a blind panic.

Beeb measures Blighty in doormats

Dances With Sheep

Standard form

In the name of all that is holy, will the buggers *PLEASE* just use standard form and stop all the fannying about?

Saying 10^12 makes far more sense.....

....... it's also more amusing to point out the UK is in debt to the tune of one tera-quid.

One in 10 Brits leaves web passwords in their will

Dances With Sheep
Paris Hilton

Porn friend ?

If leaving your inter-web passwords in your will, you might want your porn friend to access the account(s) first and delete your stash.

Paris, just because.

Ecclesiastical judge tells church: Let there be Wi-Fi

Dances With Sheep

Charity ?

*Charity* Electro-Sensitivity UK ?

A charity no less!

What is even more amusing is that they have a web page..... no doubt best viewed without the aid of any harmful electrons.

UK punters happy to pay £3 to top up e-wallets

Dances With Sheep

> Anyone who wants to charge me to spend my own money in a slightly more convenient way can go fuck themselves

For what it's worth, every time you pay with a *credit* card, Visa / Mastercard takes a 2-3% cut, which, surprise, will get added on to the shop prices to compensate. (And with American Express, it's nearer 5%...... ever wondered why so few small shops take Amex?)

If you are paying your friendly, local business, pay 'em in cash. They will appreciate not letting the credit card companies dip a finger in the pie, and cash-flow can be an issue with small business. (The credit card companies will only pay the merchant monthly)

Debit cards on the other hand, charge a flat fee (rather than a percentage) typically of a few pence. All the same, I'd rather pay cash and not let these parasites take a cut.

Prang finder site reveals accident blackspots

Dances With Sheep
Thumb Up


According to this......

....back when I got punted off my motorbike on the A57, I died.

Tony Sale, 'Colossus' crypto machine rebuilder, dies at 80

Dances With Sheep

Me too

Chatted with him at Bletchley park only a few months ago.... He was a top bloke.

One of the things he said is the difficulty of getting hold of VINTAGE VALVES for colossus computer. If you have any old 1940's valves knocking about in a drawer, send 'em to a good home....

Gerard Depardieu takes piss on plane, gets tossed off

Dances With Sheep


Quality in flight entertainment !

Murdoch's PIE BOY jailed for six weeks

Dances With Sheep

Six weeks!

With this menace off the streets, I feel safer in my bed already.

I just hope the poor fucker can cover his rent/mortgage for the time he is in the nick and still has a job to go back to.

Our taxes at work people.

Benefits of boozing outweigh harms, says survey

Dances With Sheep


So, this survey wasn’t carried out when students woke up the next day with eyes like sheep’s cunts then? Catch them all driving the porcelain bus at 9am and you might get a different answer. :-)

Do we really want 100Gig Ethernet?

Dances With Sheep

Network coax?


I'd banished the nightmare of coax to the back of my mind..... alongside memories of Highlander II and other things best forgotten about the early 90's

Kentucky man denies drunk driving, blames blow job

Dances With Sheep

Call the Guinness Book of Records

I reckon that dude has the worlds longest neck...... check out the pics :-)

Moderate boozing good for your heart: Official

Dances With Sheep

Why indeed

> Why listening to people who tell you what to eat and drink.


Because they are doctors and know more about health than we do.

Of course, if you are too thick to tell the difference between useful scientific advice on health (which you are free to ignore) and "OMG, they are gonna make us all eat sprouts" then I suggest reading the Daily Fail where you will find other people who share your misunderstanding of science.

Yeah I'm gonna get pissed & stoned this Friday. But I wont kid myself it's healthy unlike some fuckwits out there. (HINT: moderate drinking is healthy..... not necking 8 pints of ale and toking a few ceiling scrapers.)

Inventor of the Workmate dies

Dances With Sheep


I haven't been this sad since Mr "Karate Kid" Miyagi croaked back in 2005.

Census threatens spies' cover

Dances With Sheep
Black Helicopters

Holy shit this is intrusive

Christ, did they want to know your employers name and address at the last census?

Anyway, on a lighter note for Q20, Id suggest such religions as Fellater or Felcher (Jedi is SO last decade). And Q35 "What did you do at your job" is just crying our to be answered with "drinking" , "lighting farts" or perhaps "not much".

Lets face it..... in 100 years time, some kid will be reading through this lot as part of a school genealogy project. At least give them a giggle.

Pink Floyd guitarist pays McKinnon's health bills

Dances With Sheep

Just to clarify....

It's not very clear in the article, but Pink Floyd (and Gilmour in particular) have a great sympathy for those suffering mental illness due to the Floyd's founder member Syd Barrett's illness.

Syd was a genius.

Catalans to hunt wild boar with bows and arrows

Dances With Sheep


I used to bullseye womp rats in my T16 back home.