Posts by rototype

The Rise of The (Coffee) Machines: I need assistance. I think I'm running Windows. Send help

Re: If Daleks drank coffee...

Re-caffinate! Re-caffinate!

Re: We have a similar one at work

I was on holiday in France the other year and in the public toilets (in the town hall as I recall) the urinals had recycling labels above them accompanied by a selection of beverage images (eg: urinal a was beer, b was wine, c was tea/coffee etc...) taking he recycling concept a bit far.

Re: GPP

They Were...

Square peg of modem won't fit into round hole of PC? I saw to it, bloke tells horrified mate

Re: I did use a saw once...

Would have thought it was more Hammer Time https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T_wS0Kw6k9c

Re: DIMM Slots

I remember a bransd of machines that used particularly thin SIMM slots that would only take their brand of memory (this was 486 SX25 era).

Real-time tragedy: Dumb deletion leaves librarian red-faced and fails to nix teenage kicks on the school network

Re: Amiga C compiler

I remember seeing North-C on my flatmates Amiga 500**, as I recall the icon was a picture of an oil rig - very witty.

** this was one of 4 machines that we networked together with RS232 cables (the other 3 were Atari STs) so they could play games together. Couldn't join in though, my 'puter was an old RaIr Black Box running MP-M (Multi-user CP-M) with a Getronics green screen terminal (back in the day when Getronics actually made stuff, not just contracted to repair Dells), so I couldn't join in - although I did have WordStar, SuperCalc and dBaseII on it (and a massive 10MB full height HDD!!!).

I'm pretty sure it was something to do with the Muppets, or maybe just that damned annoying frog...

UK contractors planning 'mass exodus' ahead of IR35 tax clampdown – survey

Re: Anonymous Contractor

In my experience, I COULD NOT GET a permanent position for many years - there just weren't the jobs in my area to have so I didn't have any choice - if I wanted to work I had to go contracting. This is the case for a lot of smaller and less skilled contractors, the employers don't want to take on a permanent employee if they can see that role being phased out after 6-12-18 months, such as hardware and software roll-outs. This sort of job will always exist as long as technology keeps moving forward and things need to be periodically refreshed where companies don't have the in house resources to do this. (read most companies). I do agree with a previous comment about contractors needing to talk to the cowards of employers and make sure they can be placed outside this legislation - it can be done and quite legally, I managed it when I worked for the NHS at a South Wales health trust but we were about the only contractors who weren't 'in scope' (I think the thought of either losing us or having to pay a lot more urged the contract manager to do something about it.)

I've moved on from there now and I was in the position recently that the company I was contracting to saw the value of taking me on permanently and my salary has even improved slightly as a result - this is the position I wanted to be in from the start. Many many others aren't quite as lucky.

So you locked your backups away for years, huh? Allow me to introduce my colleagues, Brute, Force and Ignorance

Re: Crazy Hammer Guy

That sounds like my comment whenever things are looking like being a little troublesome -

"I've got a 3lb forge hammer in the car if you need it..."

I ACTUALLY DO carry said 3lb forge hammer in the car but only for if I ever need to change a wheel since they have a habit of seizing onto the bit around the hub. Scared the life out of one user when I got it out of the car and brought it in (we were re-adjusting the shelves in the store room at the time, theirs was just an incidental job as I was passing).

BOFH: The company survived the disaster recovery test. Just. The Director's car, however...

Not just VPs but any managers can be susceptible... reminds me of our office/server room (this was at a private school by the way) that was about 6 x 15 feet and the "aircon" was 2 pedestal fans pointing in different directions in front of the windows (one blowing in and the other blowing out. Most mornings in the summer I had to clear the drift of dead midges of my keyboard. Didn't stay there long and took a pay cut to leave and was glad of it.

The silence of the racks is deafening, production gear has gone dark – so which wire do we cut?

Re: The big red button

If your power was as prone to dropping the main breaker as ours is here you'd be happy for ANY UPS - just added another on one piece of kit that wasn't previously protected and was a pain in the arse when it had to be restarted (sometimes 3 dropouts in a day, and at random times upto and including 3:30am) Last one was 11:20 last night.

When the IT department speaks, users listen. Or face the consequences

Re: Beautiful

... And how adept did you become at removing the little metal covers off the floppy disks from the drives? Been there, seen it, done it, thrown away the t-shirt (was full of holes) - 2 expansion blankers and a little wiggling and it saves the price of a new drive.

Got out of education very soon after this and I've given up on council and NHS work as well (nope, never got IR35'd) - private only now.

Remember the 1980s? Oversized shoulder pads, Metal Mickey and... sticky keyboards?

Re: Been there...

Nearly as bad as those blasted ergonomic things (that the keytops always wear off in no time) - unfortunately my company insists on buying them for anyone who wants one on 'H&S' grounds.

Personally I just stick with a decent quality normal keyboard and have done with it.

Re: Been there...

Seems strange, they must've gone backwards on the design phase then (that or the beancounters have vitoed it on cost grounds or something).

I remember a LOT of laptop keyboards not that long ago were built with a sealed plastic tray under them and drain holes going through the laptop to the bottom. My Lenovo Wireless desktop keyboard has drain holes as well - didn't help it that much when I knocked a glass of red over it - still had to give it a good scrub but at least it's still working (it's what I'm typing this with).

(and why's no-one used the keyboard icon yet...)

Never let something so flimsy as a locked door to the computer room stand in the way of an auditor on the warpath

Re: whether if they'd had their sidearms they could have shot the lock off instead

Definitely RED, one of my favourite films.

Are you sure you've got a floppy disk stuck in the drive? Or is it 100 lodged in the chassis?

Re: Endstop recalibration

I remember them, a box called a disk drive exerciser - think I've still got one in the garage if you'd like it (for a fee of course...)

Tell me about it - I used to work in a school and became very adept at removing the metal covers from discs from the drives they had been jammed in.

The students were supposed to keep their discs in a protective cover at all times when they were not being used but often this did not happen (translation - maybe 10%) as a result the metal cover would become battered and inevitably the sides would spring out and as the discs would usually go in, the metal would then spring back and prevent them being removed, not that this stopped the students, they'd usually just pull until the disc came out minus metal cover. (occasionally they'd be good and put their hand up and say they couldn't get their disc out, but since this usually meant trouble for not keeping it in the cover the quickly stopped doing this).

The next lesson someone couldn't use the drive and we were eventually called, sometimes they'd even trace the culprit (depending on the teacher) and since it was a private school the parents would be billed for a new floppy drive.

The moral of this story is if you get the metal off a floppy stuck in the drive, 2 expansion blanking plates and a bit of wiggling are often your saviour. (I mus have unclogged dozens of drives and only once lost a drive, and I think that was on the way out anyways).

Re: Reliability

They used to sell these for the BBC specifically called 'Flippies'

Re: Reliability

Mine don't, worn out

Huawei MateBook Pro X: PC makers look out, the phone guys are here

Re: I rather like it, but for one detail

Dell 5590

The best way to screw the competition? Do what they can't, in a fraction of the time

Re: Nah.

LMFAO - That's Compo!

BOFH: Their bright orange plumage warns other species, 'Back off! I'm dangerous!'

Re: Fiat 500

Can't see that page, it's complaining that I have adblocker on and wants me to turn it off, which is NOT going to happen.

Apple MacBook butterfly keyboards 'defective', 'prone to fail' – lawsuit

Re: The only Mac I ever owned had the worst keyboard I've ever used

I've had many laptops of many different brands over the years and I now ONLY use Thinkpad T series machines, it saves a lot of hassle. (and I don't mind the styling, in my mind that's what a laptop SHOULD look like).

My PC is on fire! Can you back it up really, really fast?

Re: Magic blue smoke...

Reminds me of an incident that happened one time we were having the warehouse extended at work. Apparently the plans showed the electrical feed at one end of the warehouse and the water at the other - they weren't, they were both in the same trench that just happened to be where the JCB was digging (thinking he was well clear of both).

Here's the IT angle - the digger bucket hit the pipe and cable at the same time and caused some sparks (OK - it took out the whole power feed to that end of the building, sending massive spikes up the earth line) . The first we knew about it was our screens wobbling a bit - went to have a look at the big main server (HP D series Unix box) and as I walked in the room there was a HOOJ explosion as the UPS just shat itself (managed about 30 seconds before it did so pretty good). Managed to protect the main server as well and the only problems were from a couple of incorrectly closed files from the sudden power outage and a new pair of trousers required as I was the one to go in to see what the trouble was just before it went bang.

Re: I recall even my mum (a bit like Dilmom) telling me a fire story

Try looking for paint with the really nasty environmental hazard stickers on it - they generally come in metal cans. (don't think plastic can hold it)

Re: I recall even my mum (a bit like Dilmom) telling me a fire story

Our Chemistry teacher used one of those wide glass bowls for that experiment - Sodium was fine, fizzed and popped over the surface but the Potassium exploded (I think it ignited the gas it was producing) and split the glass bowl drenching the teacher from about the waist downwards. He didn't do Potassium the next year...

RIP... almost: Brit high street gadget shack Maplin Electronics

Re: Well at least

Anyone else tried RS recently, good prices (I remember they used to be horribly overpriced, or so I thought at the time) and good delivery, as well as 'Trade Counters' which can act as 'Click & Collect' or just pop in if they've got what you need. Or there's CPC/Farnell - similar but don't remember seeing anything about trade counters with them.

Maplin have been going down the tubes for a long time, ever since some Eejit put the beancounters in complete charge of the company, ditching any product if there's a momentary dip in sales. A story I remember from a good few years ago (when the staff actually knew what they were doing) was that the D25 plugs weren't selling as well as the D25 sockets so they were discontinued, 3 months later they discontinued the D25 sockets as well as no-one was buying them there since they coundn't get the mating plug!

Disk drive fired 'Frisbees of death' across data centre after storage admin crossed his wires

Re: What no-one has mentioned yet... - DRUMS

They were still using MTS when I started there in '89 - just for the 1st years, I seem to remember the machine was an Amdahl, no idea what model it was though (I suspect we night have been told but I don't have any notes from back then any more). I also seem to remember they had a cluster of *nix machines that the 2nd and 3rd years were allowed to play with instead of being hobbled by the old system.

I also remember an old HP analyser system when I started at RR with a fixed/removable platter on it - I only saw the cover off it once when it was being serviced and was told in no uncertain terms never to get your watch or anything that might be magnetic anywhere near the voice coil, even when it was off. Didn't need telling twice on that one.

The analyser was 'donated' to a college (who also had another virtually identical one) when we were granted funding to purchase one that could be moved by one person and was considerably more powerful (it even used 3 1/2" Floppies!!!)

BOFH: Come on, PFY, let's pick a Boss

Re: Explains a lot

A company I heard of did exactly that. I can 't remember who it was or where but here's how it went...

They were a production company and the product they made was pretty successfull and sold well, however they were still making a loss. They analysed the time usage of the higher wage earners of the company (ie the managers) and found 50% of the time they were at meetings, 35% of the time they were preparing for meetings and 10% of the time was spent writing up after meetings, leaving just 5% of actual productive time. They let go 90% of the managers and turned the company around overnight.

House Reps grease the wheels for hundreds of thousands of robo-cars on America's streets

Not quite the right statement

"we must ensure we stay in the drivers seat..." - albeit one without any controls - don't think he properly thought that one through.

Tech contractors begin mass UK.gov exodus in wake of HMRC's IR35 income tax clampdown

Re: Wait until next year..

"Therefore, expect Her Majesty's Arse to announce that the rules will be expanding to the whole economy, not just the public sector."

As far as I was aware that was always going to be on the cards, hit the public sector this year and the private sector next year.

Funny how the amount they hope to raise (£440M) seems to be about the same as they expected to raise from stopping Umbrella companies allowing contractors to claim expenses. I sense that they'll probably just about make as much from this as they did from the umbrella 'clampdown' so will want to somehow make even more the following year with another hair brained scheme.

UK.gov tells freelance techies to slap 20 per cent on fees as IR35 tax hike looms

Re: > Just the first stage

Of course they don't want self employed people - this means they actually have to individually sort out peoples tax meaning they actually have to earn their fees rather than just having the megacorps hand them the figures (and money) on a platter.

@ Doctor Syntax

Only the liability falls to the agency, it's the end user (Gov/Health/public sector department) that actually decides whether the contractors are actually within IR35, so expect some 'interesting' anomalies due to differing departments policies regarding contractors, and with some policies being blanket applied from several layers above this means some departments that can't afford to lose them will lose their contractors even when the managers of that department can prove their contractors aren't IR35. (think Dilbert and lazy/incompetent managers)

My fortnight eating Blighty's own human fart-powder

Re: Food is not only sustenance

A colleague of mine always gets his lunch from the canteen as a carry out and always eats it at his desk - he has found that this is the only way to avoid having the users pestering him with IT issues that should be logged in the proper manner (ie helpdesk) while he's trying to eat.

Burning desire helped us collar arson suspect, claim Danish cops

Re: Evidence

Or perhaps when this evidence was presented to him he 'fessed up to the crimes - what we really need is an update on the story as to what happened once it made it to court (if it did). Playmobile recreation optional in this case...

Sysadmin told to spend 20+ hours changing user names, for no reason

Happens all the time in Education circles (and medical establishments for that matter) - They think that because they've managed to get a post as a teacher then they're better than the ancillary staff and as such treat them as morons, and forget about any sort of funding unless it's one of their ideas (meaning they've probably specced up some utter shite and are merrily paying through the nose for it.

Re: funny thing about these requests

Works especially well on morning "I can't log in" od "My PC isn't working" type calls, an hour later you wander over to see how they're doing and you find they'd either forgotten to switch something on (PC, Monitor etc) or switch something off (ie Caps Lock) or they've actually properly checked and re-plugged in the cables.

Re: To the 2IC

"sending a copy to all other parties ie: the 1IC and all board members."

I did that one place I walked out of (made sure I had a job to walk into though) - it was politely swept under the carpet before anyone could say anything. Although apparently a few months later they had an impromptu IT audit instigated by one of the governors....

Plastic fiver: 28 years' work, saves acres of cotton... may have killed less than ONE cow*

I just wonder...

... How many Daily Mail readers that 120,000 included

Fatal flaws in ten pacemakers make for Denial of Life attacks

Brings new meaning to the term 'Hack & Slay'

Just makes me wonder if this is the reason for the government wanting these back doors in everything - so the secret security services can assassinate a target without going anywhere near them.

A cardboard desk? I won’t stand for it (actually I will)

Re: It's a box FFS. AT £130

Yes, and he has a Mac on it so obviously he's used to spending extortionate amounts of money of toys.

Italian MP threatens parents forcing veggie diets on kids with jail

Are we missing something here

Is there the possibility that this "law" will mostly be there to frighten the more timid veggie/vegan parents into actually thinking about what they're feeding their offspring and adjust accordingly, If this is the case then it's doing what it should - getting the younglings the correct balanced level of nutrition.

As with some other comments, I wholeheartedly agree that parents stuffing fast food down the gullets of their sprogs with the exclusion of anything that could be deemed healthy should be shot on sight. Unfortunately this has ben going on for so long now it's almost regarded as socially acceptable to be overweight or even obese. This has probably come from the PC brigade saying it's not nice to call someone a fatty 10 chins. True, if you are then it's not nice to hear and I agree there are certain medical conditions that can have the same effect but in the majority of cases it's just through eating too much of the wrong sort of food.

Personally my diet is relatively balanced (moderation is the key really) - I eat meat fairly frequently, fish at least as frequently but I also try to have a day or two each week where it's 'meat free' meals - sometimes this is down to availability (an example is when I select the meals from the works canteen as the veggie curry usually has more/nicer flavour than the beef/chicken one). My one weakness is I possibly go a little heavy on certain grain based liquid supplements - my choice and I wouldn't force it on anyone.

Tech support scammers mess with hacker's mother, so he retaliated with ransomware

"We probably all ought to pressure people in power to do more to address the issue."

Unfortunately this won't work while money is being made as those in power just say - "You're making money - where's our cut" (tax/bung etc).

Sadly this is not limited to the developing world or emerging economic growth zones but to virtually the whole world, disguised better and less blatent in more 'civilised' societies.

Get ready for mandatory porn site age checks, Brits. You read that right

Re: Mandatory Age verification on porn sites that are not hosted in the UK?

If they DO end up basically not permitting sites not UK hosted, will this (hopefully) mean the end for facebook etc...??

Re: Mandatory Age verification on porn sites that are not hosted in the UK?

Does this mean that them animals known as 'Merkins' no longer exist?

Maplin Electronics demands cash with menaces

Re: Cheeky bastards.

Halfrauds, not sure, some of their 'Pro' tools are actually quite good while not being too bad on price. Don't agree with their policy now of having the bikes and other shite downstairs while the heavy car stuff has to go upstairs (If I want to buy a battery I DON'T want to have to carry it down a big long staircase before I pay for it!!)

Maybe when they do go someone can buy their tools section off them?

Triple-murderer prisoner keeps mobile phone in his butt for a week

Re: Love the honesty

In all actuality they probably leave them switched OFF most of the time, partly to preserve battery power and partly to avoid detection. If they're only using them for the occasional weekly ET then the battery should last for a couple of months before going flat, by which time it would generally have been found and confiscated - thus meaning they probably wouldn't have any need for a charger.

On another note, they'd probably only leave them on Vibrate if they enjoyed that sort of thing.

Hacks rebel after bosses secretly install motion sensors under desks

Re: Moral police

Dependant on the state in the US that this occurred in they seem to think that anything other than Church or sports bar is unacceptable, and generally have all the subtlety of a howitzer (as well as about the same IQ).

SECRET PROTOTYPE iPAD 'stolen from RANDY Apple employee'

Re: 5 days ?!?!??!

Possibly a couple of reasons - 1) allegedly they dropped him 'over a mile from his home' - if he's an average Merkin geek it could have taken a while for him to i-wheeze his way back home (if he remembered the i-route at all, after all he wouldn't have his i-sat nav any more). 2) if all his i-gadgets were stolen that'd mean (horror of horrors) he'd have to use an ANALOGUE telephone - where's the instruction manual? - Maybe he waited until he got a replacement i-device to phone them on?

Every billionaire needs a PANZER TANK, right? STOP THERE, Paul Allen

Re: I know where there's one you can buy

It's next to the Brooklyn Bridge, offers anyone?