* Posts by plrndl

460 posts • joined 11 Feb 2010


Global tat supply line clogged as Suez Canal authorities come to aid of wedged 18-brontosaurus container ship


Re: I am most disappointed...

So. it was a colossal cock-up.

NHS looks to the market for advice on one system to replace two separate, giant Oracle ERP and HR systems


Translation: "Throwing billions of taxpayers' money at imaginary "solutions" is the new black in Boris's government, and we want a piece (a BIG piece) of the action"

What a Hancock-up: Excel spreadsheet blunder blamed after England under-reports 16,000 COVID-19 cases


Re: 'spreadsheet software as "human middleware" in the sector'


Venerable text editor GNU Nano reaches version 5.0 and adds the modern frippery that is scrollbars


We're not all two finger typists. Function keys are a PIA for touch typists.

Contact-tracer spoofing is already happening – and it's dangerously simple to do



Free beer?

Right now it's way past beer o'clock on Friday, and I'd be a sucker for anyone who could tell me where to get paid beer.

(And I don't mean that garbage that comes in cans!)

We strained our eyes with Lenovo's monster monitor: 43.4 inches for price of five 24" screens


I have a couple of second hand Dell 24 inchers that give me 3840 x 1200 for £70. I shall not be upgrading any time soon.

I say, it's beer o;clock. Must be going.

Gospel according to HPE: And lo, on the 32,768th hour did thy SSD give up the ghost


Validation of the supplier's part

If HP can screw up the due dilligence on a multi-billion dollar acquisition, what hope do we have for a cheap, replaceable component?

The wheels on the bus go round and... Oh dear. Chancellor Sajid Javid unveils spending review


London's Experience

In the short period when Boris was Mayor of London, he increased bus fares by over 50%.

Be still, our drinking hearts: Help Reg name whisky beast conjured by Swedish distillers and AI blendbot


Abort, Retry, Fail?

Given the Microsoft connection, I suggest:

Old Dosser

Iran is doing to our networks what it did to our spy drone, claims Uncle Sam: Now they're bombing our hard drives



So, you employ vast armies of people who have never had even a minute of formal computer training, stick them is sensitive government and government support jobs, and give then a powerful, internet connected PC.

What could possibly go wrong?

Um, I'm not that Gary, American man tells Ryanair after being sent other Gary's flight itinerary


I used to have a problem with an American namesake using my gmail account, mostly for porn sites.

He got the message when I changed his NetFlix password, and cancelled the account. Unfortunately I still get masses of spam as a result of his activities.

More nodding dogs green-light terrible UK.gov pr0n age verification plans


THINK of the Children

I should just like to point out that the nonsensical idea that children should be kept ignorant about sexuality until they are old enough to marry, was created by paedophiles in the Christian church, because naive children are easier to seduce and manipulate.

Holy moley! The amp, kelvin and kilogram will never be the same again


Re: Filthy SI Units

Presumably, post Brexit, we will revert to the avoirdupois "system" which as any fule kno, is based on peas, pounds and ounces (1 pea ~ 0.23gm). Who needs froggy measurements?



I am disappointed to see that no-one has translated this article into proper el reg units.

Standards are falling.

I'm off to the pub.

Oi, you. Equifax. Cough up half a million quid for fumbling 15 million Brits' personal info to hackers


Re: GDPR can't Fix this

If you're using Windows and other MS software in a business environment where you have access to confidential data, you deserve everything you get.

Australia blocks Huawei, ZTE from 5G rollout

Big Brother

5 Ears?

I strongly suspect the the real reason is the absence of back doors in Chinese equipment.

Amazon, ditch us? But they can't do without us – Oracle


Re: Of course they're still spending...

"Sure, and when Amazon is the only retailer left, come and tell us how you are enjoying their prices, once they no longer have to undercut anyone."

In business, your profit margin is your competitor’s collateral. No-one could get backing to compete with Amazon, when it had 0% profit margin. If Amazon reaches a monopoly position and hikes its prices, competitors will rapidly emerge.

Select few to watch World Cup in 4K high dynamic range colour on BBC iPlayer


Re: Yeah...

Judging by current performance, Liberty will take F1 down-market until the sponsors quit, then sell it at a huge loss.

Ferrari and friends will start a new series.

Crypto-gurus: Which idiots told the FBI that Feds-only backdoors in encryption are possible?


Re: Please also ask T May

The votes are in "being seen to do something about it". There are far fewer votes in "doing something effective".


Phase 2

OK, so you've got your magic impossible encryption.

How do you propose to make the black hats use it?

Chrome adblockalypse will 'accelerate Google-Facebook duopoly'

Thumb Up

Can Spam

Most advertisers are stuck in 1950's TV mode where you spam people as relentlessly as you can afford. This is no longer acceptable, and this is what Google is tackling. Advertisers need to recognise that targeted advertising is the only way forward. Facebook in particular has enormous capability to target ads, so that punters are unlikely to see ads for stuff in which they have no interest. Unfortunately for the advertising industry,this means sobering up and doing some work.

Basket case lawsuit: Fancy fruit florists flail Google over rotten ads, demand $200m damages

Thumb Down

Pot? Meet Kettle

If you use generic English words as your trading name, in the hope of getting a free ride from Google, you should not be surprised when your competitors try to outrank you by paying Google for advertising their alternatives.

You can't find tech staff – wah, wah, wah. Start with your ridiculous job spec


"Skills Gap"

I once saw a modest IT job, at an extremely modest salary, advertised in the London Evening Standard. The list of requirments was so long, that literally no-one alive could possibly have ahcieved them.

Hate to break it to you, but billions of people can see Uranus tonight


Re: Uranus's Moon

Bottoms up!



" 18.91 astronomical units"?

This is The Register. Let's have some proper el reg units.

'Don't Google Google, Googling Google is wrong', says Google


Next up against the wall

...and gifting.

Sacre bleu! Apple's high price, marginal gain iPhone strategy leaves it stuck in the mud



It's a long time since I've used closed source software, but I seem to recall that if you wanted documentation you had to buy a book that cost almost as much as the software, and was probably two versions out of date. The last time I bought software with proper documentation is was, dare I say it, MS DOS.


Re: £1,149 why do the stupid people have all the money goddamnit!!!

That's actually the wrong question. The smart question is "why don't the smart people have all the money?"

I think I'll go and ask around in the pub.

They say we're too mean to Microsoft. Well, how about this... Redmond just had a stonking year. And only 8% tax. Whee!


Re: Thoughts on tax avoidance

I don't understand people who criticise companies for obeying tax law.

If you have a problem with the way tax law works, you should direct your ire at the people who created that law.

And the idiots who voted for them.

I'm off the the pub, which is the proper place to discuss these things.

BOFH: That's right. Turn it off. Turn it on


And if it turns out he's on 7...or a non-Windows machine?

That's no reason to not blame Microsoft.


Best BOFH ever.

Have a beer on me.

It's time for a long, hard mass debate over sex robots, experts conclude


that's held up to recent research

Don't put too much faith in research. Most "research" is skewed to fit a pre-determined conclusion.

Brit prosecutors ask IT suppliers to fight over £3 USB cable tender


Brexit from Amazon

Any chance it could get lost in the post?

Do we need Windows patch legislation?


Locking the Stable Door

What's the point of mandating the provision of patches when the users refuse to install then until after there is a problem?

Microsoft to spooks: WannaCrypt was inevitable, quit hoarding


@ GingerOne

You obviously know absolutely nothing about operating systems.


Security Agency?

The NSA has produced a "tool" that has been used as a weapon against the people it is supposed to be defending.

The NSA has failed to protect itself from the inevitable hackers, enabling this tool to be released in the wild.

The agency is clearly unfit for purpose, and counter-productive, and should be dismantled ASAP.

This goes for GCHQ too.

(The icon is intended ironically.)

Ubuntu UNITY is GNOME-MORE: 'One Linux' dream of phone, slab, desktop UI axed


Almost Right


A few more days of sackcloth and ashes, and he would have realised that what the world really wants is Ubuntu and Cinnamon (and no, I don't mean Mint).

PS Now that you've freed up some developer time, how about getting USB2 to work properly?

Blighty starts pumping out 12-sided quids


Shame it's only worth 3d. There used to be 80 of these to the pound. Thank you for the inflation, chancellors of all parties.

Everything bad in the world can be traced to crap Wi-Fi



What is "error #2035", on your video playback?

Nuclear waste spill: How a pro-organic push sparked $240m blunder


Re: billions of tons of lard

It's called "America".

German music moguls slammed for 'wurst ever DMCA takedown spam'


Re: die die die

Using an automated system to find possible copyright infringers is a sensible option. Using that system to initiate legal proceedings without the alleged infringement being checked by a competent human is a huge abuse of the legal process. They should be hit very hard in the wallet for this.

Hellooo, NSA? The US State Department can't kick hackers out of its networks – report



Maybe they should outsource their IT to China.

For pity's sake, you fool! DON'T UPGRADE it will make it worse


Alternative Technology

I've heard of a device called a "fountain pen" that allows one to draw any desired character directly onto the paper. Remarkably the ink for this amazing device can be purchased cheaply at most stationery stores. Worth investigating?

Are you ready to ditch the switchboard and move to IP telephony?


Voice Quality

If you use the phone as part of your sales procedure, forget digital, unless you really are from Elbonia.


Your hard drives were riddled with NSA spyware for years



So that's the end of the US technology sector then. Good job NSA.

Violin-fiddling boffins learn that 'F-HOLES' are secret to Stradivarius' SUPERIOR sound


Pleasing the ear?

Any such algorithm would produce results similar to those produced certain TV shows, where "music" that is pleasing to the masses is produced by a voting process that eradicates anything that would be pleasing to the musically literate. Such sounds are readily realised by generic mass-produced violins.

Regarding the Strad, the most sensible comment I have heard is by a user who said that it's not so much the sound which is exceptional, but the result from the player of the demands placed by such an instrument on its user, that he should be worthy of such a venerable instrument.

Reg hacks (and rest of 'Frisco) in LinkedIn measles contagion scare


Mountains and Molehills

When I was a kid (UK 1950's) EVERY kid had measles. I have heard that there can be serious complications, but I have NEVER heard of anyone who has actually experienced this.

hive mind informs climate change believers and sceptics


As icon

Why Windows 10 on Raspberry Pi 2? Upton: 'I drank the Kool-Aid'


Re: Embrace. Extend. Extinguish.

@ Suricou Raven

Netbooks and ultra books are at opposite ends of the market, and do not compete.

MS & Intel killed off netbooks to protect their fatter margins on fatter devices. Netbooks have been replaced by tablets, and the evil duo have lost out completely (PMSL).

Ultrabooks are Mac Airs for people who want to run Windows.

Scientific consensus that 2014 was record hottest year? No


Re: Cut the sh*t!

It was pretty cool in the late 60's, but since then it's all gone to pot.



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