Posts by seven of five

UK's Sellafield nuke waste processing plant fined £333K for infosec blunders

Re: Bullet dodged

> If anywhere should have a good attitude towards infosec you'd hope it would be the nuclear industry

Why? "The state" will rescue them anytime, anywhere. Less effort than "system relevant" banks required.

Mega supermarket spots stock discrepancy of tens of millions amid ERP system migration

Re: $10m

Nutella? Yuck! Since Wander was bought by ABF, Caotina (and Ovomaltine) should be available to you. You may proceed from there.

Microsoft hits go on Windows 11 24H2: Fresh features, bugs, and a whole lotta AI

Step aside, this is a job for the Meltagun.

Kyndryl follows in IBM's footsteps with rolling layoffs likely affecting thousands

> "You used to have to have highly skilled people to do things before the cloud," explained Brooks. "You don't need highly skilled people. You can manage your daily environment through a web browser."

"You used to be able to drive before FSD was invented", explained Elon. "You don't need to drive, FSD can manage your drivi*beepbeepscrEEEEEE*CRASHBANG... fire...

Windows 11 Patch Tuesday preview is a glitchy disaster

Impressive

I find it always amazing how much Micros~1 manage to break with just a single patch - or a handfull of them. One click and carnage all over the place.

IBM and Oracle to support 280,000 users after winning mega ERP govt tech contract

Re: Oracle, seems I've heard that name before

Probably not. But significantly more expensive.

Europe to force Apple to help rivals connect to iOS, iPadOS

Re: Cunning plan.

Ohhh.. nononono... Revenue in Europe is only a few thousand Euros, barely breaking even. It is Eire only is making a profit, so this is where the tax comes in. All other countries? Ha, Philantrophy from apple, gracing the Europeans with their devices. Never made any money of thene, nu-uh.

seeee?

AI has colonized our world – so it's time to learn the language of our new overlords

Re: "Best to just suck it up and master Delvish"

Do as the IRA/RAF do: cook your own semtex. Or use a bucket of Diesel mixed with Stryofoam and let the fire suppression system do the hard work when it detects the smoke.

Re: "Best to just suck it up and master Delvish"

And so much less satisfying.

Mainframes aren't dead, they're just learning AI tricks

Staff shortage

Of course it would be possible to train the relevant staff inhouse. But that would take many quarters, and five quarters is the longest timespan imaginable for any manager.

Veeam debuts its Proxmox backup tool – and reveals outfit using it to quit VMware

This is an "AI" generated post? Or did someone drop his box of "tech gibberish"?

31.5M invoices, contracts, patient consent forms, and more exposed to the internet

man-in-the-middle

"So hypothetically all a criminal would have to do is contact the customer, using the same invoice as a template and say, 'hey, we've updated our billing information. Click on this link to pay the balance.'"

Sure, could. Hypothetically. But that would have been illegal, so what could have POSSIBLY gone wrong!?

LEGO's Concorde is the only supersonic jet you can build for the price of a fancy dinner

Re: concorde/ryanair comparisons

Lounge suit, track suit, what's the difference, eh?

City council faces £216.5M loss over Oracle system debacle

Re: Good timing

When all else fails, there is still the Germans.

> If the city is bankrupt enough to be unable to fix a pensioners fence panel then it's bankrupt enough to not pay the fucking bill for these cowboys.

Number of lawyers you mom can afford: zilch.

Number of lawyers Oracle has on staff: YES.

any further questions?

NASA pushes decision on bringing crew back in Starliner to the end of August

Re: To answer your question !!!

> [At least, it does not involve increasing Boeings running 'Dead Body count' ... which is a good thing !!!]

yet.

Getting up close and personal with Concorde, Concordski, and Buran

Re: Eating Tips

"drei Bier ist auch ein Schnitzel"

and you had no drink with that!

Elon Musk claims live Trump interview on X derailed by DDoS

It is a conspiracy! ~150m people in the US conspire against Trump.

/s

Twitter tells advertisers to go fsck themselves, now sues them for fscking the fsck off

Re: curious

Ah, then Archduke Franz Ferdinand. The other Austrian wasn't shot in the back of a car.

Re: curious

You are Lee Harvey Oswald and I claim my five pound?

Elon Musk is suing OpenAI again, claims CEO Sam Altman ‘betrayed’ him

Wouldn't it be for animal cruelty, I'd love to add a VERY angry and hungry Tiger to said cage...

Chrome Web Store warns end is nigh for uBlock Origin

"because it doesn't follow best practices for Chrome extensions,"

Nice wording from google. Putting the blame on uBO, as if it was their fault google moved goalposts and obsoleted functionality in order to maximise revenue. Bastards.

Tesla that killed motorcyclist was in Full Self-Driving mode

Re: Not entirely true

> (And we're the people who know rain and 35F/2C is nice riding weather.)

Granted. But you're also the people who don't know 350kg are more than two Motorcycles should weigh :P

Kia Niro electric vehicle defies physics with record-breaking 114 million miles on the clock

Re: "11,309 miles per hour"

I'd wager they first have to catch him. Now, how fast is an unmarked Volvo Estate?

Forget security – Google's reCAPTCHA v2 is exploiting users for profit

Re: solve captcha to continue

Don't get me started on that... "bikes". Well, what do we have here? A motorcycle, a scooter (bleargh), two bicycles... what am I supposed to select?

solve captcha to continue

Click on all crosswalks.

click click click.

click on more crosswalks.

click click.

click on more crosswalks.

close tab.

Tesla sales, market share dip in EU while other EV makers grow

You're just's want it for you'reself's!

SCNR

Microsoft to intro checkpoint cumulative updates for Win 11

Re: I'm not sure

blink.

double blink.

well. duh... you know who's the greatest and bestest whizzzkid at Micros~1 these days? Kinda controversial guy, has had a past run in with linux? Not the one to fancy plain text, read- and editable ini files...

I mean, it DOES make a lot of sense to me, but ... that might be hard to sell with them.

And this "(text editor) of you choice" ... quite sure Micros~1 doesn't mean the same thing as we do do when it comes to "your" and "choice".

AMD spills the beans on Zen 5's 16% IPC gains

> I had an outrageously overclocked 486 that ran at 160MHz, which kept it competitive with the Pentium 75.

Oh yes, good times. AMD P75+ chip, 4x locked multiplicator and a VESA-II boards capable of 50MHz board clock (doing only 45, as the CPU did not fancy going the full 200MHz). Had to be actively cooled (unheared of, back then for a mere 486). Did teach me a few things about the worth of a larger cache and could easily keep up with a Pentium 90.

Heh.. .thirty years ago. Damn.

Db2 is a story worth telling, even if IBM won't

Re: IBM would attempt to execute a "cloud-first" strategy with Db2

But just look how much money they saved!

yuck!

Cloudflare debuts one-click nuke of web-scraping AI

Re: ICE

Black ICE isn't proactive, it just can't be arsed to deal with repeat offenders :)

For the record: You just ordered me to cause a very expensive outage

Re: Electrical Engineer?

He was drunk?

Julian Assange to go free in guilty plea deal with US

Re: Even if the judge honors the plea deal

It is only illegal when others do it.

Oracle Java license teams set to begin targeting Oracle users who don't think they use Oracle

Almost. They'll also threaten to sue you into oblivion when you don't cough up a beeeeeeleeon doolars for the past century of java use.

VMware by Broadcom warns of two critical vCenter flaws, plus a nasty sudo bug

So from the net via vcenter into any VM?

Thats quite a holy grail...

Let's take a look at Oracle's love and hate relationship with open source software

Hey Larry: Fuck off, Larry.

Tesla slams advisors for not loving Musk's $44.9B payout

Re: Honestly don't think Tesla will be around much longer in its current form

They can run into rescue vehicles and set fire to themselves - doesn't that count?

Miscreants claim they've snatched 560M people's info from Ticketmaster

"Cyber" now is "caiber" - with AI

sorry. A bit.

Parliamentarians urge next UK govt to consider ban on smartphones for under-16s

Why that? Since I gave the retards a bad name by comparing them to politicans?

(Apart from the fact it would never work): wow, that's a retarded idea, if I ever heard one.

UK PM Sunak calls election, leaving Brits cringing over memory of his Musk love-in

Re: Disappointing

I seriously doubt you can make a scot drunk enough to accept that deal.

Apple says if you want to ship your own iOS browser engine in EU, you need to be there

Apple really, really, REALLY wants the EU to park a tank on their their lawn, do they?

This is going to end well...

A Chinese crypto farm next to a nuclear missile base? Not on my watch, says Biden

Re: Umm...

Too complex. Just open one of the better and affordable take-aways round the corner. Home/site delivery will do the rest.

Oracle CEO says more tech can help offset tech's worst effects

"Oracle’s real purpose was to help humanity."

Fuck, that was unexpected, but excellent. Probably the best one I heard in years.

You owe me a new keyboard.

Japanese scientists propose drug to regrow teeth, promise trials won't bite

Re: This could be big

Hold still while I get a 2x4...

Council claims database pain forced it to drop apostrophes from street names

Re: Input validation

Sparda Bank in Germany? They know about that, they just can not be arsed to fix it.

Tesla Cybertruck turns into world's most expensive brick after car wash

Witchcraft!

Elon Musk's X to challenge Australian content takedown orders in court

Re: Boeing

Absolutely.

>Boeing bringing flying cars to Asia

Personally, I'd think they should start with "flying planes" - but who am I to know aerospace enigneering...

>Boeing thinks Asia's congested megacities are ideal locations for flying cars.

Sure thing, a couple of well distributed fireballs is going to improve traffic soooooo much.

Cybercriminals threaten to leak all 5 million records from stolen database of high-risk individuals

Re: GhostR contacted El Reg

They'd love to tell you, but then they'd have to kill you?

Whistleblower cries foul over alleged fuselage gaps in Boeing 787 Dreamliner

Re: Easy solution

too quick.