Re: I am enjoying this dispute
You are Nick Leeson and you owe £600 million...
Posts by Fr. Ted Crilly
557 publicly visible posts • joined 18 Jan 2010
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Re: who would very much prefer their payloads to be launched on European rockets.
Do we not agree there's no point in a hospital run solely for the staff?
That's not how I would express it.
It's how I would.
Indeed Minister.
How would you express it Humphrey? At the end of the day, one of a hospital's prime functions is patient care.
One?
Until we have the money for nursing and medical staff, it's a function we can't pursue In 18 months or so.
18 months? We can open some wards.
No, it's got to be now.
I suppose we could form an inter-departmental committee to examine the feasibility of monitoring a proposal for admitting patients earlier.
How long would that take to report?
Not long.
How long?
About 18 months.
I suggest we get rid of all the staff there and use the money to open closed wards in other hospitals, when we can afford it, we open St Edward's with medical staff.
Do that and you'll delay the opening for patients for years, you talk as if the staff have nothing to do!
What do they do?
Really, Minister! There's a large number of extremely busy departments. Firstly, the Contingency Department for fires, strikes, air raids, nuclear war, epidemics, food or water poisoning.
In such a crisis, the hospital is a key centre for survival. Then, the Data and Research Department, conducting a full-scale demographic survey of the catchment area.
We have to anticipate the future requirements for maternity, geriatrics, paediatrics and the male/female balance.
Thirdly, there's Finance - projected accounts, balance sheets and cash-flow budgets. Then, the Purchasing Department for purchasing medical equipment, examining estimates, looking at price lists and catalogues...
Purchasing what?
Everything, Minister. Everything from brain scanners to Brasso! May I continue?
Be briefer.
Would that I could, Minister, but you need to understand. Fifth, the Technical Department for evaluations. Sixth, the Building Department dealing with Phase 3 plans, costing and so forth for the final
phase to be completed by 1994.
Then, there's Maintenance, Cleaning and Catering, Personnel in charge of leave, National Health Insurance, salaries, as well as staff welfare officers to look after the 500 employees.
And finally, Administration.
Administrators!
More administrators administrating other administrators!
This is important work, Minister. The typing pool, stationery, office furniture and equipment. Liaison between departments.
Are you being serious or not?
What do you mean?
There are NO patients!
That is what a hospital's for. Patients! ill people! Healing the sick!
But all these vital tasks must be done with or without patients.
Why?
Why?
Why?
I don't understand.
How else can I express it? Why?
Would you sack the army because there's no war?
Completely different! A hospital must produce results.
We don't measure our success by results but by activity. Those 500 people are seriously overworked. The full establishment should be 650, may I show you the paperwork?
No, Humphrey. Enough is enough. Sack them!
Out of the question, Minister.
We need administrators or the hospital will never open.
Sack the ancillary staff.
The unions won't wear it.
Sack half and use the money to get doctors and nurses and open some wards!
No, Humphrey, that's my last word. My last word! You may go!
Very well, Minister. I shall have a word with the unions....
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Re: Blockers
ahh..
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Re: "You deserve this more than me"
The Vl'Hurgs were a species who lived on the far reaches of the galaxy. They declared war on the G'Gugvuntts, the original reason being to force the G'Gugvuntts' leader to take back what it had said about the Vl'Hurg Commander's mother, when a freak wormhole carried Arthur's words, "I seem to be having this tremendous difficulty with my lifestyle", into the midst of their negotiations - it just so happens that in the Vl'Hurgs' language, that phrase is considered the most dreadful insult imaginable.
The Vl'Hurgs waged war on the G'Gugvuntts for a long time, until they realised that it had all been a terrible mistake, and the two armies joined forces to attack Earth.
Unfortunately, due to a terrible miscalculation of scale, the entire fleet was eaten by a small dog.
Biting the hand that feeds IT
