* Posts by Anonymous South African Coward

2797 posts • joined 6 Jan 2010

Mayflower, the AI ship sent to sail from the UK to the US with no humans, made it three days before breaking down

Anonymous South African Coward Silver badge

I'll give it a good dose of Cap'n Browneye.

Updating in production, like a boss

Anonymous South African Coward Silver badge
Coat

DBA needed to install Informix on a new server on site, and transfer data from old server.

SSHd in to the server, set up Informix etc, did an oninit -iy to prepare and bring the DB online...

...only to find it was on the production server.

Oninit -iy initializes the database. Like formatting a disk.

And yup, everything was gone. Backups was a futtup.

Took two software support techs a couple of days of SQLing to get redundant data from other sites into this site and get everything up and running again.

Wasn't me... I was at the pub that day. Going there soon.

Playmobil crosses the final frontier with enormous, metre-long Enterprise playset

Anonymous South African Coward Silver badge
Thumb Up

Re: I am holding out for the drone version...

Klingon Bird of Prey with working cloaking device for me, thankyooverramuch....

Anonymous South African Coward Silver badge
Happy

Tribbles?

Will these be multiplying like real tribbles?

WE ARE DOOMED!!!

but edit : dangit why do toys get better the older I get? BAAAAAAAAAAAAAH, I wanna go back to childhood and play with this!!!

Vissles V84: Mechanical keyboard hits all the right buttons for Mac power users

Anonymous South African Coward Silver badge

Would love to have a decent, mechanical keyboard, one that goes <clickety><clack> like the BOFH's do.

BOFH: When the Sun rises in the West and sets in the East, only then will the UPS cease to supply uninterrupted voltage

Anonymous South African Coward Silver badge
Pint

What a wonderful Friday.

An excellent Stob, and a good BOFH.

I think I can safely skedaddle off to the pub now.

Anonymous South African Coward Silver badge
Trollface

Re: Poor cyclist

Richard*, not Dick.

*Cockney rhyming slang a la Spike Milligan. Let's see how many get it.

Stob treks back across the decades to review the greatest TV sci-fi in the light of recent experience

Anonymous South African Coward Silver badge
Happy

This is brilliant. Made my day so much better.

Thanks!

IBM pulls up the ladder behind some supercomputer customers

Anonymous South African Coward Silver badge
Happy

Re: Can't help feeling a little disappointed

Hopefully the BOFh will rectify that soon... will be very interesting reading!

The AN0M fake secure chat app may have been too clever for its own good

Anonymous South African Coward Silver badge

I would've kept this thing tight under wraps, and never mentioned it.

Now the cops will have to find another way of getting into the ne'er-do-well's lines of communications, and this time the ne'er-do-wells may turn the tables by sending cops on useless chases all over the country/world/galaxy.

Do you come from a land Down Under? Where diesel's low and techies blunder

Anonymous South African Coward Silver badge

Re: looking at the DNS log

Checked a pr0n filter log on a company firewall.

Only once. Never again.

The best time to plant a tree is 20 years ago. The best time to build a semiconductor foundry is 5 years ago

Anonymous South African Coward Silver badge

Pfft, just type in cheat code A-E-G-I-S to make things go faster...

Or I-D-K-F-A

Door-opening insect mega-swarm emerges in Eastern US, descends on Washington DC

Anonymous South African Coward Silver badge

I'll leave it here for SoT fans.

https://sot.fandom.com/wiki/Cicada

Fastly 'fesses up to breaking the internet with an 'an undiscovered software bug' triggered by a customer

Anonymous South African Coward Silver badge

Re: Credit where it's due

My thinking as well.

If one site managed to create a bork this big, then something's wrong with our designs.

Today I shall explain how dual monitors work using the medium of interpretive dance

Anonymous South African Coward Silver badge

Re: Some of us are ...

The eighth son of an eighth son...

A wizard squared...

A source of magic...

Anonymous South African Coward Silver badge

Re: Laptop + Projector = two computers?

Also used to microwave a pie for breakfast just before the meeting, so the room smelt of hot food

That's one of the nasty trickses of a good BOFH

Antivirus that mines Ethereum sounds a bit wrong, right? Norton has started selling it

Anonymous South African Coward Silver badge

then store the results in the Norton cloud

And have somebody blag it... I won't be surprised if some enterprising ne'er-do-well will manage just that...

Seagate finds sets of two heads are cheaper than one in its new and very fast MACH.2 dual-actuator hard disks

Anonymous South African Coward Silver badge

We demand a video showing the hard drive in operation! :)

Anonymous South African Coward Silver badge

Re: I remember fixed head disks.

Bada-bum-tsss to follow soon...

How many remote controls do you really need? Answer: about a bowl-ful

Anonymous South African Coward Silver badge

My Xiaomi Redmi Note 8 have a built-in IR eye and an IR app which you can program to work with your telly/hifi/aircon as long as it is on a list of recognized devices.

Helps a lot to cut out controls.

Used it only a couple of times to play merry hell with the boardroom aircon, people was not amused at getting hot, then cold, then hot during a long and boring self-important presentation...

Tech scammer who fooled Cisco, Microsoft and Lenovo out of millions jailed for more than seven years

Anonymous South African Coward Silver badge

Will the affected companies leave the existing warranty protocols in place, or will they tweak things further, like forensically analyzing photographs of purportedly faulty/broken equipment serial numbers?

Either way, the honest customer will suffer as there will now be extra hoops to jump through, as well as those who sit with the equipment whose serial numbers was used in this sort of scam...

Most probably you will be required to send in the faulty piece of kit/hardware in first for them to assess before they will send you out a replacement, causing long downtime issues.

FYI: Today's computer chips are so advanced, they are more 'mercurial' than precise – and here's the proof

Anonymous South African Coward Silver badge

Re: Once upon a time.....way back in another century......

In the Elder Days, when things was Less Rushed, sure, you could take your time with a product, and deliver a product that lived up to its promises.

Nowadays in these Younger Days everything is rushed to market (RTM) after a vigorous spit 'n polish and sugarcoating session to hide most of Them Nasteh Buggreh Bugs. And nary a peep of said TNBB's either... hoping said NTBB's won't manifest themselves until closer to the End Lifetime of the Product.

Case in point - MCAS.

ZX80/81/Speccy users must be chortling with glee as their ancient Z80 CPU's still produces vaild results and nary a corruption.

Anonymous South African Coward Silver badge

Re: The Spanish Inquisition

Aren't a Mother Confessor and a team of Mord-Siths more practical for getting out confessions?

Wyoming powers ahead with Bill Gates-backed sodium-cooled nuclear generation plant

Anonymous South African Coward Silver badge

Re: A source for cheap renewable power...

That's all that most politicians do these days - chase the money and enrich themselves, no matter the cost.

All of these political shenanigans reminded me of a quote from Dune :

Frank Herbert — 'And always, he fought the temptation to choose a clear, safe course, warning 'That path leads ever down into stagnation.'

Anonymous South African Coward Silver badge

Will this turn into another Hinkley Point C?

At least it'll be BillG's money being wasted, right?

Ahem, Huawei, your USB LTE stick has a vuln. I SAID AHEM, Huawei, are you listening?

Anonymous South African Coward Silver badge

Re: To be fair...

Agreed! Hiding the fugly crown jewels under a thick layer of bright and eye-catching sugar-coating.

Former IT manager from Essex pleads guilty to defrauding the NHS of £800k

Anonymous South African Coward Silver badge

(former) Manager in IT?

He's no BOFH.

Refurb your enthusiasm: Apple is selling an 8-year-old desktop for over £5k

Anonymous South African Coward Silver badge
Trollface

I pictured an office refuse bin with an Apple logo on it...

The server is down, money is not being made, and you want me to fix what?

Anonymous South African Coward Silver badge

Re: Dark Monitor

Terminator 7 : Dark Monitor

Anonymous South African Coward Silver badge

Re: I added a sentance...

Beautiful. Oh, well done!

BOFH: But we think the UK tax authorities would be VERY interested in how we used COVID support packages

Anonymous South African Coward Silver badge

This one will also mature well and be a delight to read...

Well done, excellent.

Now, vere are mein tax auditors und collectors?

Ubuntu, Wikimedia jump ship to the Libera Chat IRC network after Freenode channel confiscations

Anonymous South African Coward Silver badge
Trollface

now that'll be a fun thing to try on any remaining freenode channels...

After staff revolt, Freenode management takes over hundreds of IRC channels for 'policy violations'

Anonymous South African Coward Silver badge

Game of Thrones?

Or is it Game of IRC Servers?

Just what is the poop capacity of an unladen sparrow? We ask because one got into the office and left quite a mess

Anonymous South African Coward Silver badge

But if planned and done properly, any shipping container can be converted to a most excellent small office or the such.

As mentioned, insulation and the such need to be high on the list of things to be done.

Oh Lord, won't you buy me a Mercedes-Benz? Detroit waits for my order, you'd better make amends

Anonymous South African Coward Silver badge
Coat

Re: Sometimes though....

On Reddit somebody in r/sysadmin mentioned that he had an user with a dial-up modem.

Everything worked beautifully, but then the user got ADSL.

And ADSL doesn't warboe, beep or boop. User was most unhappy.

Cue brainstorm - every time user want to "connect" to the internet, a script is run playing a .WAV of a modem handshaking and connecting - and user was happy.

Pub o' clock time, will be gone the whole day to have a bout of nostalgia at those simpler times... --->

Samsung shows off rollable and foldable displays, suggests they'll arrive in 2022

Anonymous South African Coward Silver badge

Sagsmug at it again.

I'll take a traditional phone any time of the day, one where I know the camera is, and which I can hide/disable if I want to.

Anonymous South African Coward Silver badge

Re: No thanks to a camera behind the screen

Purveyors of pr0nz will make a plan...

Anonymous South African Coward Silver badge
Trollface

Re: Meanwhile at Apple...

You forgot the patented rounded corners.

WhatsApp: Share your data with Facebook, or we'll make our own app useless to you

Anonymous South African Coward Silver badge

Some of us old-timers are seriously contemplating going back to BBS systems.

Yes, those which we used with modems etc. But adapted for the multi-user environment, able to handle more than one (or two) logged on users.

Anonymous South African Coward Silver badge

MeWe : https://mewe.com

Looks like they're gaining traction.

Preliminary report on Texas Tesla crash finds Autosteer was 'not available' along road where both passengers died

Anonymous South African Coward Silver badge

A number of fatal crashes have been attributed to over-reliance on vehicle automation by drivers.

I will not have a car with automation installed. Makes one lazy and tend to enforce the habit of letting your attention wander.

The driver need to be aware at all times of other cars and objects around his/her car.

If you want true automation, get a donkey/horse carriage.

Anonymous South African Coward Silver badge

Re: Best just make a full size scalextric

dodgycoin?

As another vendor promises 3 years of Android updates, we ask: How long should mobile devices receive support?

Anonymous South African Coward Silver badge
Unhappy

It's all about the money.

Updating a phone costs money. If the phone(s) can be pumped and dumped, then it's the users' problem, not the company's problem.

Also, CEO fatcat types need moar moniez for their bling lifestyle.

British bank TSB says it will fix days-long transaction troubles tonight

Anonymous South African Coward Silver badge

Wot mate? I thought all banks - with the exception of TSB - was solid and reliable in Blightey, it being a bastion of Western civilization. Or have I missed something?

Maybe Sid Meier need to add a "wibbly wobbly electronic banking services" into his next Civilizations release for added realism.

Going forward, the Brits can jolly do well to learn from our South African people - if they're unlucky about something, they'll loot, burn and destroy. Not sure if that will get the message across?

Chinese rocket plunges into Indian Ocean, still lands sharp rebuke from NASA

Anonymous South African Coward Silver badge

Re: NASA .. a sternly-worded statement

Think they'll plan a launch so as to pollute the USA part with geosynchronous space junk?

Anonymous South African Coward Silver badge
Unhappy

Re: Perhaps,

Which country's government's the biggest performer in that regard? Probably South Africa...

Jaguar Land Rover reaches for graph database in search of supply chain knowledge during chip shortage

Anonymous South African Coward Silver badge

...Harry Powell...

Why am I thinking of Harry Potter?

Anonymous South African Coward Silver badge

Re: Got any 300TDis handy?

ECU less = field hardened.

I pity the poor sod going into the boondocks and an ECU fries...

Anything can happen in the boondocks. Mr Murphy's a regular visitor to forn parts.

Big right-to-repair win: FTC blasts tech giants for making it so difficult to mend devices

Anonymous South African Coward Silver badge

Re: Merceded

So that means you'll either have to buy a completely new Mercedes, or make-do with a Bluetooth speaker paired to your phone for music etc...

I have been eyeballing the integrated radio consoles in modern cars. They sure look neat and all that, but they'll be a ballache to replace should Mr Murphy drop in for an unwanted visit.

The older style of radios are easier to replace if not worth repairing.

Anonymous South African Coward Silver badge

Re: Being able

I don't care for thickness. I'll sacrifice a few mm of thickness just to have a removable battery.

Clever engineering can be used to make sure that the battery package is optimized by using the least space possible, to keep it neat and thin.

Of course we don't want a brick like the Nokia Communicator...

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