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26107 publicly visible posts • joined 31 Dec 2009

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Top CEOs agree: US is down the crapper

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Good job the problem is only in the USA

I mean Britain would never fall into the trap of keeping out foreign expertise for purely political reasons and thanks to our students getting exponentially better grades each year our universities can hardly cope with the numbers of brilliant scientists and engineers.

Feds relax export curbs on open-source crypto

Yet Another Anonymous coward Silver badge

Why

It's not because the Feds can suddenly crack all encryption - this doesn't make it any easier for N Korea to get pgp.

What it does prevent is some embarrasing cases where major bits of open source software couldn't be hosted in the US because the license said free to anyone but the US made you click a bunch of disclaimers that you wouldn't use it to build WMD or export it to N Korea.

It also meant somebody could in theory sue any US company for violating the GPL - they are using the GPL software but cannot distribute their changes - because they can't be exported.

So you could go after Oracle, IBM, etc and possibly get some judge to block them using FOSS whileit's all sorted out (or until they settled out of court with you)

The New Linux: OpenStack aims for the heavens

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@Can't be good..

MSFT's TCP stack is almost entirely open source ( BSD) - would it have been better for them to have 'done a DEC' and implemented their own proprietry version of the internet?

If using open source components without them giving anything back means that MSFT at least stays a little more compatible with open standards that's fine

Asus slips out keyboard equipped Android tablet

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I already invented this

I spilt coffee on my laptop keyboard, which means I have to use the on screen one or a plug-in usb keyboard to run win7.

Does this mean I invented the win7 tablet?

Civil servants touted ID cards to friends, family as flop loomed

Yet Another Anonymous coward Silver badge

The LibCon replacement

Since nobody wanted an id card do we get an ego card from the new lot?

Ubuntu tablet rumored for early 2011 launch

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@Tablets shmablets

>what does one do with a tablet

Take two and call me in the morning?

Skype's mega-FAIL: exec cops to cause

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Sounds familiar

Didn't the US POTS phone system go down for a similar reason years ago.

They introduced an upgrade into a switch which failed - after it had sent the upgrade to the next switch, and so on.

Mind your own: Scotland unveils privacy principles

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@Is it just me or..

Because anything that is bad they can just blame on the lot down south

Do you still get your DNA retained in Scotland? Yes but thats the governments fault

Will your web visits and phone location get tracked - yes but thats the EUs fault

National Identity Card holding chumps have buyer's remorse

Yet Another Anonymous coward Silver badge

@How will refunding £900,000 cost £20 mil

It doesn't - 20M is the cancellation cost.

It's redundancy payments to staff, paying off leases on offices and equipment and paying to destroy and hard drives and storage in accordance with whatever data protection policies.

And of course a big chunk of cancellation clauses to companies that knew this was doomed when they signed up - and so put big front loaded costs into the job

Yet Another Anonymous coward Silver badge

My brain hurts

A Daily Mail 'journalist' was first in the queue to support labour's silly idea.

They are now complaining that the Tories are NOT throwing taxpayers money around to idiots.

Did we pass through some strange wormhole into a parallel universe - again ?

Enormous 1km ice-cube machine fashioned at South Pole

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I think you mean the Thing

The post is required, and must contain letters.

Microsoft says no to Kinect sex game

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family?

I don't know if Americans just overeat until they divide in two - but getting a family generally involves sex.

US Navy's electric plane-thrower successfully launches an F-18

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Fly Boys

There's not just the jobs of the fly boys - there's also their future political careers.

You can't really show a picture of you sitting in front of a mil-spec Xbox driving a UAV in Gulf War 4 on your election poster when you run for president/PM

Missile defence FAIL: US 'kill vehicle' space weapon flunks test

Yet Another Anonymous coward Silver badge

@See, folks, this is the point of testing.

Although the nice thing about NOT testing an anti-nuclear missile shield is that you don't get many customer complaints if it fails.

Yet Another Anonymous coward Silver badge

Espionage

Now that el'reg and Lewis have leaked this sensitive information that is damaging to America are we going to see an arrest and an extradition request from Wales - over the photos from last years outward bound team building exercise?

Yet Another Anonymous coward Silver badge

How smart is this thing?

Thinking of the bomb in DarkStar.

They launch this into space - it's cruising around enjoying the view when suddenly a speeding test missile hurtles towards it - naturally it's going to try and get out of the way.

No more books on Ireland's banned book list

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Age limits aren't enough

ooFie - do you understand the amount of damage that has been caused by Ivor Horton's beginning C++ ? What age limit would you set on "Introducing sharepoint for pointy haired bosses"?

Sometimes this sick material has to be banned for the good of society

English Defence League membership list stolen

Yet Another Anonymous coward Silver badge

EDL

shit - I think i switched my electricity supplier to them

Google beefs up search result malware warning

Yet Another Anonymous coward Silver badge

No it won't

It flags legit sites because they have an ad banner that is hosted on the same provider as a dodgy ad. Then ignore your requests to remove the flag unless you respond from within your Google(TM) pay(tm) service(tm)

In any other industry it would be called a protection racket.

Air Force blocks access to sites that covered WikiLeaks

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Pravda still ok

What about the North Korea exchange and mart ?

Email protected by Fourth Amendment, says appeals court

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@One area where the US is definitely ahead of the UK

Of course certain 3 letter agencies will still be able to do it secretly, or in the name of national security, or will just 'ask nicely' and then forgive the ISPs later, or will just get a warrant that covers such a broad range of people that it's pointless

Gov.uk to grant £5k to e-car buyers

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@£24k.

Because the makers know that half the price of these cars are being paid for by grants / tax-breaks / etc and so double the sticker price - and then double it again for the UK

Remember when the government bought BBC micros for every school ? Remember how they cost twice as much as every other home computer ?

US Army 'to issue every soldier with a smartphone'

Yet Another Anonymous coward Silver badge

@BOWMAN

To be fair two tin cans a bit of string and a pigeon is better than BOWMAN.

The issue with military and industrial kit is that I might just want to replace a broken unit next year with the same model. But instead I have to upgrade my entire army because I can only buy new iPhone7 and they aren't compatible with iPhone6 that the rest of the unit has and iPhone5 that the navy has and ...

So we will buy COTS and next year we will be buying the old stuff from specialist suppliers at 10x the cost.

Want to bring your own PC?

Yet Another Anonymous coward Silver badge

In reality

Developers not allowed to bring in their own laptops to check online docs etc

Managers allowed to take their company laptops home, lend them tot he kids for a bit of downloading, log onto all the services through un-encrypted wifi at every airport, exempt from having any sort of password for anything - because it slows them down.

Grand jury meets to decide fate of WikiLeaks founder

Yet Another Anonymous coward Silver badge

re: You mean the Espionage Act of 1917

Ironically they then deported Chaplin for showing too much hatred of Germans - 'premature anti-facism'

Grey marketing is great - if you're the importer...

Yet Another Anonymous coward Silver badge

@The case for segmentation..

Yes you can sell for whatever you want to different sectors.

But if you want to sell your product across the EU at different prices - and you want the individual countries to ban somebody in the UK buying the cheaper one from Germany then you can't also complain if the German government decides to add a 100% tax to UK software.

If it's a level playing field for goods and services then you can't demand to pay the same tax and the same for raw materials and then not allow the consumers to do the same

Death of ID card scheme left £6.5m of kit going begging

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@LD50

>'m just lost for words.

That's why it costs 41M quid to come up with the right words!

Walmart falls in with Washington's war on terror

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re: Where have I read this before ?

Wouldn't happen today of course

The kids would have just shouted 'peado' and Mrs Parsons and her concerned neighbours would have hung Mr Smith there and then

Yet Another Anonymous coward Silver badge

Do I smell a sales opportunity here?

Attention shoppers - the world is ending, time to panic

"Buy canned goods, aisle 1, gas masks aisle 2, guns and ammo aisle 3-99"

In the UK it only takes 1/4in snow and people are panic buying bun-cases and royal wedding tea towels. Imagine if you ran ads about a terrorist attack in a store that sells machine guns.

Mastercard downed by Anon-Assange-fans

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and NORAID

But of course there was no such thing as terrorism in the UK before 7/7 was there?

Yet Another Anonymous coward Silver badge

@neh...

It's in the news, which means that the story that MC blocked wiki is also in the news which means people are talking about whether the US government leans on international companies for it's own political reasons.

Which is worthwhile - but don't worry there will be another royal wedding or popidol winner along in a moment to restore the news cycle.

Police back ends must be slimmed, says Home Sec

Yet Another Anonymous coward Silver badge

Cutting IT

Funny how in business you invest in IT to save money but everytime a public body wants to save money it does it by cutting IT?

I think I'll go an turn off a few servers to save make us more profitable.

Anybody know where I can buy carbon paper, typewriters and some box files to replace them ?

Gov to resellers: Glory bonanza secrecy days are over. For real

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All the civil service's fault?

So the decision to give a non-cancellable contract to build a couple of aircraft carriers to a ship yard in a certain Scottish constituency was purely down to civil services incompetence then ?

These contracts never have any political significance ?

Selling Apples to Japan: Complicated as a Nipponese typewriter

Yet Another Anonymous coward Silver badge

@Geez...

In the UK in the 90s Macs were priced assuming 1GBP=1USD and only sold through official Mac stores.

We used to support visiting US profs with Macs but nobody that hadn't worked int he states had one.

Tube to get phone coverage by the Olympics

Yet Another Anonymous coward Silver badge

@Paris Metro

They mostly aren't really 'tunnels' - the metro ones are at least 2 and mostly 3-4 tracks wide, they are square, straight and concrete. All you have to do is mount a directional antenna in the top corner and point it down the tunnel.

When there is nowhere to mount an antenna without it being wiped out by the next tube train, the tunnels are bendy and most of the early ones have iron liners it becomes a bit of an advanced exercise in RF design

Unarmed Royal Navy T45 destroyer breaks down mid-Atlantic

Yet Another Anonymous coward Silver badge

Ideal solution

The point of the armed forces is to keep BAe/Thales/RR executives in gravy and workers in marginal constituencies in pot noodle.

Since our enemies de-jour either live in caves in land locked countries or can wipe us off the map with nukes in a few minutes (or just turn off the gas) then the only thing the navy is going to get to fight are icelandic fishing boats and somali pilots = a small cannon seems more sporting.

Not fitting them with big expensive missiles seems like a sensible measure - rather like not giving traffic wardens shotguns.

MP wants age verification for net smut

Yet Another Anonymous coward Silver badge

The old porn definition

No problem now that we have a (mostly) tory government again - so they would get to decide what is porn

In this site it's just men and women having intercourse - thats obviously not sex, there are no oranges or suspenders visible

Immigration caps won't touch tech transfers

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@Maybe I'm being a dumbass but

And if you are a mature student coming to do a degree you leave your kid back home in day care for 4years? Or a PhD student leaves their husband/wife behind?

There is a simple solution to the scam language schools - pull their accreditation.

And those coming for 'sub-degree courses', that includes those attending Eton and Sandhurst - who are probably admittedly scum but you can't really blame them for that.

Facebook royal rant bishop suspended

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God botherer talking sense shock

Although if the guy you are complaining about is going to be your boss - you might not want to do it on twitter.

Get out the bar, your plane's leaving

Yet Another Anonymous coward Silver badge

@Heathrow

I always considered Heathrow a sort of desensitization experiment.

You arrive on your nice comfortable efficient Singapore Airlines flight, after a week in nice,comfortable, efficient Singapore, or Malaysia, or Korea, or Japan then Heathrow is a very nice efficient way to inoculate you against the world of broken escalators, dirt, permanent half-finished construction and British 'customer-service' before you hit the tube.

Maude: Gov contracts 'made my eyes water'

Yet Another Anonymous coward Silver badge

New open bidding form

Field1 - Number of jobs you will create in marginal constituency we want to win

Field2 - Number of jobs you will transfer from safe seat of other party

Field3 - Number and salary of directorships for senior civil servants / cabinet ministers when they retire

Field4 - Number of contracts for UK stuff your government will cancel if we don't agree to buy your computer/missile/fighter

Yep, can see that being plainly detailed in an online form

Christians vs metalheads in FB flame war

Yet Another Anonymous coward Silver badge

Crusades

The first crusade was due to the pope-of-the-day, having invited lots of heavily armed knights to help him deal with some troublesome vikings in Sicily suddenly needing somewhere safe to send the horde of blood thirsty hooligans before they started making too much mess in Rome.

Later crusades were mostly a church land grab and an excuse to kill a few Jews.

Has CERN made the VATICAN ANTIMATTER BOMB for real?*

Yet Another Anonymous coward Silver badge

The anti-lewis

The 1 at the end of lewis's name signifies that he is the matter (+1) version of Lewis, if he ever meets lewis(-1) we are in trouble

LIDL punts circular saw blades to innocent kiddies

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The Christmas connection

Well yer man was a carpenter, "parkside - the saw blades Jesus would use"

US may disable all in-car mobile phones

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@Dazed and Confused

Simple, instead of a rule making it illegal to carry kids in the back of a pickup - simply make it compulsory

Lincs authority lets schools decide on Pagan lessons

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Splitters

"new age paganism, neo-celtic paganism or neo-norse paganism "

I think that's how they managed to prove that they were a genuine religion.

Of course it was a bit tricky when they couldn't demonstrate they had bombed anyone else over a difference in interpretation .

$8.9m poker prize up for grabs - humans only please

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Suspicious ?

“We're at mid-range amateur level. Nothing particularity spectacular,” says Bowling from the university of Alberta's gold plated underground monorail equipped poker department.

"Nothing to see here ... please don't trip over the piles of gold bars on your way out - we aren't very good at online poker honest"

Plastic plod used police database to find dates

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@Really

No they don't have to wait for a conviction to fire them - you just make unauthorized use of the PNC a sackable offence.

It's a sackable offence for me to enter some parts of this site without authorisation and the correct safety gear - doesn't mean they are dispensing instant justice.

Yet Another Anonymous coward Silver badge

Perv scanners

She should have waited until the new airport scanners are linked into the great police database - then she could have really 'checked out' prospective boyfriends.

US Army's new $0.5bn British airship will fly 'mid-next summer'

Yet Another Anonymous coward Silver badge

@target practice, anyone

Yes but anything that can shoot to 20,000ft and have a large enough warhead to damage a helium filled airship (they aren't exactly vulnerable) isn't going to be something you can carry on a donkey or hide up your burka.

So 0.1seconds after you fire the outgoing round somebody's artillery radar is going to spot it and do a bit of serious counter-battery fire on your ****.

This will give the artillery something to do since they have generally been a bit limited by the lack of targets they are allowed to shell (dropping large amounts of explosive ordnance on civilians or your own side being a role generally reserved for the airforce.)

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