Posts by Yet Another Anonymous coward

What's HPE Next? Now it's unemployment for 'thousands' of staff

Futures contracts on employee redundancies - sounds like a good idea.

We can roll up contracts from different employers into a single collateralized peon package and then securitze that against ...

Simple- you just do it again.

If you fire 5000 people and save $1.5 Bn then you just need to keep doing that every year and after 11 years you will be profitable (*)

(*) assuming income is unaffected by having no staff

Security pros' advice to consumers: 'We dunno, try 152 things'

Re: Don't open unexpected attachments

It's more like saying that someone on the street asked you to take a parcel and leave it in the CEOs office

Except with email we expect each employee to accept random packages from strangers at their desks all day to do their job.

If you were on an assembly line for a car and all the parts arrived by different courier dozens of times a day directly to you by-passing security. And it is your responsibility to check that piston rods were ok if sent by "safe-courier" while "safe-courrier" are crooks and then to check that the person in fedex uniform isn't a North Korean spy.

Re: Don't open unexpected attachments

I see - so instead of the computer thinking "why is a pdf attachment to an email fetching an exe from the internet and then rewriting all the user's files.

It's safer for the user to think. Mmm Jones does work in accounts and has sent me an email asking me to check this invoice but perhaps I will call him first on a secure phone line (after checking it really is him by asking him what we did at the office party I will then consider reading the email.

Unless of course that's what he want's me to do - in which case I must drink from the goblet in front of me, but he already knows that so .... (sorry might have gone off-track)

Don't open unexpected attachments

Seriously - why should it ever be a user's job to protect the company from this?

It's like saying we delivered some coffee in the break room - some of it contains anthrax, users should exercise caution.

If your system allows harmful attachments in or allows damage when they are opened - it isn't the users fault. Especially if you constantly email company documents that demand permission to run macros when they are opened.

'We've nothing to hide': Kaspersky Lab offers to open up source code

Re: One word:

Or NSA contractor copied NSA malware onto an unauthorised computer, said computer was running Kspersky AV which uploaded the malware signature. Depends if you believe in NSA contractor incompetence or elite Russian cyber whatsit

Re: Assertions about comms and FSB

The same applies to US and UK companies except with the extra bit about the law being secret.

The question you have to ask yourself is, who do you need protecting against - the USA/UK government or the FSB?

If you are anti-governmental organisation eg. Greenpeace, black-lives-matter, Boris's election campaign, etc then use the one owned by the FSB. If you are a Russian target eg. Boeing/Lockheed - use the one owned by the NSA. If you are BAe you are out of luck

Suddenly Israel find Russian spies ARE using Kaspersky to hack into western/USA computers

IIRC Israeli spies hacked into Kaspersky and found that they (kaspersky) had detected USA malware.

Let's make the coppers wear cameras! That'll make the ba... Oh. No sodding difference

At least in the US the police could turn on/off the cameras at their discretion - for reasons of public privacy.

Re: Suprised

Or you just take the suspect around the corner out of view before they accidentally fall over and die.

Or simply

Police know that if they video evidence of them doing something naughty it will be lost or they can rely on a carefully picked jury to ignore it.

Jeff Bezos fires off a blue dart, singes Elon Musk and SpaceX

You are right, without competition they would make massive really really fat profits.

So far neither ULA nor Arianespace have managed to make much in the way of profits.

With no competition you can ask for big government subsidies, so prices stay high, so there is no demand, so you need to ask for big government subsidies ....

If you drop the price of getting to orbit by a factor of 10 the increased market means you make more money than a handful of government contracts for your monopoly service - even with competitors.

Re: Building a factory in 'bama will also have helped no end.

IIRC wasn't 'bama chosen because nobody would notice a bunch of Nazis turning up there - or at least nobody would care.

'Screaming' man fined $149 for singing 'Everybody Dance Now'

Re: Spitting Image

I thought they were the new spitting image?

I remember watching the campaign thinking 'these puppets have got really lifelike'

Wowee. Look at this server. Definitely keep critical data in there. Yup

Decoy targets that have no user function

I think we just found HPE's business model

Big Blue's former CIO tried to join AWS, ends up at energy company

Re: Huh?

How did you get hold of IBM's secret strategy?

Phone crypto shut FBI out of 7,000 devices, complains chief g-man

Knowing that the Chinese communciated with their embassy 10 years ago isn't very useful

Knowing that your political opponent in the primaries sent a dick pick to his girlfriend in college or made a joke about smoking pot 20 years ago is very useful - that's why you save everything.

Boffins trapped antiprotons for days, still can't say why they survived the Big Bang

Re: The future...

Because there would be lots of place where they would meet = lots of x-ray emissions we would see

National Audit Office: We'll be in a world of pain with '90s border tech post-Brexit

So we would need to buy the system from an English-speaking country whose immigration rule is simply no-foreigners?

Should be able to get 3 bids - no problem

Boss visited the night shift and found a car in the data centre

Re: Things that don't belong in a working data center ...

Little girls called Molly

HPE quits cloud servers, two weeks after telling El Reg it wouldn't do that

Were they ever clear about which one was the low margin business ?

Re: Vaxen

They switched to the much better long term solution of Itanium

DXC slashes meal allowances for travelling troops: Please sir, may I have some more?

Re: No health based exception to per-diem, well sorry no deal.

Type 2 diabetes means you have to avoid leather shoes

They are ok in moderation, but you can't have any rich sauce on them

Legends of the scrawl: Ordnance Survey launches augmented reality tool for maps

Well it does take the guess work out of JCB drivers hunting for fiber cables

Tell the public how much our tram tickets cost? Are you mad?

Sometimes stupidity helps.

We went from a simple "drop paper ticket into box by driver" to a super-cyber electronic transit system.

It would save $3M/year on fare dodging and be outsourced to a private company, and only ended up costing $50M more to install than they claimed and about $20M/year more to operate.

It also required a GPS signal and data link when you tapped in or out at the start/end of the journey. - to work out the fare. Which in the underground bus station only took a minute or so - for each passenger on a 100seat bendy bus.

The solution was to make the entire system a single zone, priced at the old rate for the shortest journey. The rationale = the loss in revenue was less than the cost of operating the new system, - so a saving !

IBM broke its cloud by letting three domain names expire

Re: RotM

So if IBM build the terminators they will be made redundant before they reach you

HP terminators will fall apart as the left and right legs are split into different companies

MSFT terminators will suddenly get converted into fluffy 3d bunnies by the fall creative update

Not their fault

The intern that knew how to do the web stuff went back to school and doesn't seem to have a left a fax number to contact

Google faces $10k-a-day fines if it defies court order to hand over folks' private overseas email

Re: Maybe the company should relocate

Because there are lots of jurisdictions that would tell a US warrant to go fsck itself especially if it meant they became a global cloud data center - center.

Or I could have the data hop around different foreign sites every night, or I could split archived data across different countries to make it almost impossible to work out what warrants where needed

Re: The Law

They can be guilty of contempt if they did it deliberately.

If I copy all my failed clinical trial data to Borat-istan and then claim I can't say how many patients died because that would be against Borat-istan data privacy laws - you can bet the FDA is going to take a dim view.

Or zero since they can presumably write this off as a business expense against tax?

Re: Maybe the company should relocate

No Microsoft deliberately made their Eu subsidiaries separate to meet Eu law.

This is data held by Google for a US customer but it happens to be sitting on a foreign server.

Much as I hate to side with the DOJ in this case (unlike MSFT) they have a point.

If a US company eg. Enron / Bernie Madoff / Lehman Bros was allowed to work only with cloud data held remotely then they could tell any US agency with a US warrant or a freedom of information to get lost.

Any large US company would be totally above the law.

GE goes with Apple: Not the Transformation you were looking for, Satya?

Such as? Worth investigating, as that's an area we haven't looked at yet.

Solidworks, CATIA, whatever-ProE-is-called-today, Arcgis - the sort of things a General Engineering company might need

Is this only for MS-Office only jobs?

There isn't a lot of support for engineering software on mac.

If this only works for Powerpoint+Word+Outlook users then just give them a Chromebook and Office365

Didn't install a safety-critical driverless car patch? Bye, insurance!

Re: Safety-critical updates?

Logical conclusion - as soon as manufacturer is aware of a flaw that will require a safety-critical patch..

This is exactly the current system with aircraft.

The manufacturer can order immediate grounding until the fix is applied, or it must be applied within n days or at the next service interval - depending on the severity.

If there is a recall on your current car it doesn't mean you need to be constantly on the NTSB's webstie and screech to a halt as soon as a safety notice is published.

Like Uber, for socialism: Chinese leader calls for more use of AI, big data and sharing economy

Re: State capitalism, not socialism

Capitalism is where the roads, police, fire, military, environmental protection and child education are the province of government.

Communism is where the roads, police, fire, military, environmental protection, child education and health care are the province of government.

Banning fake news?

Who does he think he is? A democratically elected leader of a free country or something?

You can yacht be serious: Larry might be planning his own version of America’s Cup

Re: Oooh, clever..

It's called the Americas cup - why are these foreign boats allowed to compete?

First annual review of Privacy Shield gives it a resounding... 'adequate'

Re: So,

But when they make the ombudsperson's job permanent then he/she will have total power over the US intelligence agencies

Watchdog slams HMRC, Amazon over 'dismal' response to UK biz hurt by online VAT fraud

Re: Simplify taxes and make fair

My nice country house in Oxfordshire? Oh it's in the green belt so it's a farm, so I don't pay tax. And I get 400K back in tax-rebates for the trees out back. Your flat in London? Oh we added 8K to the rent to cover the 6k in land tax that the "landlord not the tenant pays".

Brit intel fingers Iran for brute-force attacks on UK.gov email accounts

Well if we have the backdoor key then the nasty foreigners obviously don't have it and so we are safe.

It's eastasia - we have always been at war with eastaisa

Please replace the sword, says owner of now-hollow stone

Re: I prefer the more mundane explanation ...

This is in wales. Have they reached the iron age yet ?

One historian's description of anglo-saxon warriors, based on the things they were buried with = psychopathic peacocks.

Re: If he really doesn't want it to go walkabout...

The bugger who can push a sword INTO a stone - he's the one you need to watch out for

No, the FCC can't shut down TV stations just because Donald Trump is mad at the news

He's right

You can't use the FCC to shut down political opponents - that's what the IRS is for

Neutron stars shower gold on universe in big bang, felt on Earth as 100-second grav wave

Re: Get it right.

And a few seconds after that they detected a phone call saying "have you been injured in a neutron star collision that wasn't your fault? you may be entitled to compensation"

Supreme Court to rule on whether US has right to data stored overseas

If the US won't extradite terrorists over-enthusiastic users of N. Irish cultural weapons, I can't see them handing over a sysadmin obeying a US warrant

A US court could order the parent to order the Irish subsidiary to take certain actions.

What if the US parent has direct technical access?

Can the US court order a US sysadmin in the USA to access the servers in Ireland in contravention of Eu law? The US employee wouldn't be breaking any US law if they complied but might be breaking US law if they refused.