Posts by Yet Another Anonymous coward

Someone tried to poison a Florida city by hijacking its water treatment plant via TeamViewer, says sheriff

Re: "Florida City" - LOL

And yet el'reg is full of commentators suggesting that they should have a cyber security system suitable for Cheyenne Mountain

Re: @ The cur ... For the love of the wee man

Our small town of 1000 people solves this by having the water system totally air-gapped, off-line and controlled by a dedicated 24x7 team of on site engineers operating from an earthquake and forest fire proof bunker surrounded by anti-terrorist fences and armed security. Of course it does mean our water bill is about $1M/year

Actually I think there is no equipment connected to the internet because there is no equipment, I think Bill goes and tips a sack of chlorine into the tank on thursdays if he isn't busy.

We could do with a computer to detect the occasional dead beaver stuck in the inlet. Unfortunately Googling 'beaver stuffed into my pipe' got the last council fired.

Web prank horror: Man shot dead while pretending to rob someone at knife-point for a YouTube video

Re: hmm

Worked for 'Heat'

Re: This is why they should be banned.

Well if someone shot the guy doing the POTUS stunt we would be better off

Linus Torvalds labels Super Bowl 'violent version of egg-and-spoon race'

Re: Never understood some names

Kestrel shooting, it's like clay pigeon shooting but faster

Re: Never understood some names

>Because it's not really "my" local team, it belongs wholly to the ownership group.

What you need in America is more sectarian hatred

Have you tried having historically Catholic and Protestant football team in each city?

That can build extremely strong brand loyalty over centuries

Re: But also recommended Hockey as the way of peace.

In liberal pussy Canada you aren't even allowed guns on the ice.

You can duel with Zambonis like real men

Re: It's all homoerotic crap.

Great serious of youtube talks by the doctor for the TT race (*)

"at scene of accident count the number of bikes, then look for that number of casualties"

* Later killed in a bike racing accident

Re: But also recommended Hockey as the way of peace.

>How many death certificates mention "hockey" in the cause of death box?

In Canada it's "natural causes"

Seriously they want to end fighting in under 16 leagues. Political correctness gone mad

Re: It's all homoerotic crap.

>And how would they have coped with a low flying Jonah Lomu?

The Americans ?, obviously

Re: Never understood some names - MK Dons

Mönchengladbach's attempt to move to Krakow also failed for similar reasons

Re: Never understood some names

In the UK it's much more sensible, keep the team in the same northern city but move the ownership between Gulf states and leave all the fans in India

Hacked by SolarWinds backdoor masterminds, Mimecast now lays off staff after profit surge

Re: the criminal won't be getting his Bitcoin wallet back (...) police have seized it

They have the wallet - it's a little leather one with a USB stick that can also hold keys.

All the criminal has is a post it note with a number written on it.

EncroChat hack case: RAM, bam... what? Data in transit is data at rest, rules UK Court of Appeal

Re: In storage...or in transit....

But the point of a one time pad is that the message can be deciphered into any messages of that length.

So you can't prove that the 'real' key doesn't decide into something else nefarious

Re: Next legal argument:

The photon has a non-zero probability amplitude at any distance.

So the photon 'existed' in the police station, so they didn't intercept it, it came to them.

Re: In storage...or in transit....

No need - you get 5years for not telling us what it means,

ps we don't have to believe you that you don't have another secret key that you haven't told us.

Intel sues former staffer for allegedly stealing Xeon cloud secrets in USB drives and exploiting info at Microsoft

Re: A bit of an Intel fail

>At least in the fab, most employees who gave notice would be escorted to the door and have their cube packed up & shipped to them

A bit pointless, if you knew you were going to leave you would already have copied anything before telling HR.

A bit like someone retiring after 40years and on their last day you have security march them out in case they are going to steal office supplies.

How do we combat mass global misinformation? How about making the internet a little harder to use

Re: How do we combat mass global misinformation?

So if you feed a Markov chain on conspiracy gibberish - it twists it into the truth ?

Re: Australia should pull the Plug on Google...

>Google does not deserve the power to dictate to the entire world.

That's Murdoch's job

Re: Strawman

>Because they refuse to hire enough people to actually monitor the traffic

We should employ Google operators just like in the days of 'directory enquiries'

Of course with 40,000 queries/second you might have a bit of a wait - but it would solve unemployment

Re: Trust nothing, check your data, use various sources.

But before the internet you could trust it is tribal elder said eating mammoth with cloven hoof make sky God mad, now people are expected to do their own research

Re: That's the sort of thing

You can't trust wiki to be authoritative on serious matters. That's why you should always check the Journal of Clanger research if you can't remember the details of the soup dragon

Don't scrape the faces of our citizens for recognition, Canada tells Clearview AI – delete those images

Re: The one I remember...

"What's this here", he said suspiciously, "about us got to give you faggots?"

"Oh, we have to have them," said Newt. "We burn them."

The guard's face broadened into a grin. And they'd told him England was soft. "Right on!" he said.

From the greatest book ever, strangely left out of the TV version.

Re: since they’re all publicly available anyway

There is also some applied permission once you publish it.

For example this message is copyright and you owe me one first born son, 3 Cadburys creme eggs and a million $ for copying it to your browser cache.

Square Kilometre Array Observatory has a council now, so building super-sensitive €1.3bn telescope is next on agenda

the first meeting of the observatory's council is cause for some celebration.

Especially if it goes viral on Faceboook

Vote machine biz Smartmatic sues Fox News and Trump chums for $2.7bn over bogus claims of rigged 2020 election

Re: Should be fun: Donald J Trump as witness.

Typically you don't build the library until you stop being president.

But he is still president because he won the election, and he gets 3 extra turns because he found a golden ticket and he played the joker in a double bonus round.

So he won't actually build the library until 2230, but keep sending the contributions now -

>These morons thought that they were free to lie as much as they liked,

They didn't 'lie', they are a satirical comedy show

Rudy is just doing a Sacha Baron Cohen (possibly Rudy is Sacha Baron Cohen!)

Accused murderer wins right to check source code of DNA testing kit used by police

Re: Blackstone's Dictum

That doesn't help. It's not the source code as such (although they will point out any bugs to the jury) it's the fitting model and algorithms.

Expert to 12 random jury members: See here where they use a 3rd order Legendre polynomial to fit the background level to a confidence interval of 0.5% - no reasonable person would find that acceptable.

And I'm using big words and have a nice suit and look like a professor so you have to believe me and not the other guy.

Re: Go for it

Because you aren't going to get convicted from just the timestamp on a home CCTV.

But $Rich_Bastard$ is going to get off a drink driving charge because the police can't produce the wafer masks for the ARM core in the breathalyser

Re: "You mean every cheap surveillance camera..."

Famous Italian structural engineer author (forgot name)

Writing about appearing as an expert witness in a building collapse case in New York.

The lawyers spent all the time objecting to him being called professor because he was only a visiting professor in the USA and only a full professor in somewhere called Rome, and what did they know about buildings, and nothing asking him about the actual cause of the collapse.

Re: "the program's source code is a trade secret"

>You leak, you get caught, you're guilty and risk a sizeable fine anyway.

Screaming Mad Jack, address 'The dumpster in the alley behind the Boeing factory' claims Airbus is using chemtrails to control his mind. He gets to review all their designs and software.

When he loses the plans he is sued in a civil case and Airbus get a $bn judgement against his shopping cart of junk.

Re: Too big to be bug free

That's the problem with the jury process.

They will find bugs. The software doesn't handle DOS attacks or it doesn't escape Sql statements embedded in a person's name.

This will be presented as 100s of 'errors' so they must acquit

Brit IBM veteran wins unfair dismissal case after 2018's Global Technology Services redundancy bloodbath

Re: Like people producing something useful, the Title Is Optional...

But if the HR dept needed to make anyone in the HR dept redundant they would have to hire more staff to deal with the work

Re: Like people producing something useful, the Title Is Optional...

Imagine if somebody had invented some sort of mechanical device for processing information quickly.

Then you wouldn't need armies of middle managers making reports for other higher layers of manager

Re: Never mind the quality, just look at the cost

The only thing IBM have going for them is a bunch of govt contracts that get renewed because 'nobody got public-inquired for buying IBM', soon they will be bought by Carl Icahn and devolve into a patent troll

Re: HR evaluations everywhere...

Microsoft teams (allegedly) used to hire a couple of idiots every year to fire as cannon-fodder to protect their people from stack-ranking

>Of course, if not all jobs are moving then the selection criteria must be objective and fair,

Which is why the safer alternative is to make everyone redundant and then start hiring for new jobs on new contracts

Re: redundancy is laying off workers where the job no longer exists

>The employees should have been offered, at a minimum, the option to move to new location

First you have to suggest to the new country that your HR dept is now in charge of their immigration policy.

Obviously not a problem for a world bestriding super-power such as Apple, but could be an issue for a non-nuclear IBM

Because other tech companies think that you need qualified staff to make a profit. Most of my work is trying to find new staff and keep the ones I have from leaving for SV

My bad! So you're saying that redacting an on-screen PDF with Tipp-Ex won't work?

Re: Multi-coloured Tipp-Ex

You idiot, you should have just ordered it online

Re: Lego™®

Start the "Campaign for Real Lego"

(we also demand that all Lego figurines have full beards)

Alphabet Workers Union hits Google data center contractor with labor complaint: We were banned from discussing wages, say staff

Re: I.T. contract temp workers

Not an opinion with el'reg readership

Let a 1000 IR35 trolls bloom

Nearly 70 years after America made einsteinium in its first full-scale thermo-nuke experiment, mystery element yields secrets of its chemistry

Re: Half Life

The rate of women leaving you is proportional to the number of women you have at the time?

Re: “It was discovered by accident in the debris in the first hydrogen bomb”

>There's a ban on testing

There's also a small practical difficulty prosecuting somebody who has a stock of 10Mt nukes they are prepared to set off

ESA signs off on three more service modules for Moon mission – despite agency boss casting doubt on 2024 landing

>Returning the moon could be considered a first step to do so.

What do you learn on the moon that you can't do in orbit ?

What does going back to the moon for a flag saluting selfie do to get you nearer to a Mars colony ?

Do you like non-stick pans? = Du Pont in the 1930s first used in Manhattan project

How about scratch resitent lenses = Zeiss for the German army

artificail limbs = Pirates + several world wars

laser eye surgery = IBM

solar cells = Bell labs, phone tower repeaters,

digital cameras = possibly, first real commercial use was spy satelites

CAT scanners = EMI (the Beatles record company)

LEDs = Russians in the 20s, French(Marie-Curie's lab) in the 30s

Re: In other news, SN-9

That was a rabbit hole - their spaceship even lands on legs !

UK Test and Trace chief Dido Harding tries to convince MPs that £14m for canned mobile app was money well spent

Sorry that would have made slightly more sense if the NOT EQUAL sign I entered had shown up

Myanmar’s new military government bans Facebook

Re: Somebody finally did it

Because 98.7% of the messages on it would be Nabokov-esq porn and the other 128% would be conspiracy nuts explaining how Jewish space lasers are responsible for burning their toast.