Posts by Yet Another Anonymous coward

UK.gov presents its National Space Strategy: Space is worth billions to us. Just don't mention Brexit, OK?

Re: "Space is worth billions to us"

I welcome the Prime Minister's move to conquer the Galaxy but call on him to go further, Britain must maintain access to the whole observable universe

Computer shuts down when foreman leaves the room: Ghost in the machine? Or an all-too-human bit of silliness?

Re: How the hell does someone become foreman w/o a sense of cause & effect?

Cause and effect doesn't apply to computers if a corporate IT dept is involved.

It's one of those universal whats-names

Anonymous: We've leaked disk images stolen from far-right-friendly web host Epik

Re: Oops - I thought I was at the Register site...

That's what they want you to think !

Re: "Epik happily hosts services and individuals who hold those views"

Except for the fact that it actually operates and didn't involve years of objections from Oracle I assumed it was

Re: Nazis bad at computer security

Fortunately our own political leaders are big fans of experts, whatever their race, creed, colour and school

Nazis bad at computer security

Would only be funnier if it was a gay guy that hacked them

Re: Free speech?

What lies? They are all slimy lawyers I'm sure there were no actual lies.

Copy a fantasy from the Internet. Send it to MI5 and have it returned with a note saying "this is bollocks", classify it so nobody finds out.

Make a statement in the house saying: "We have received Top Secret intelligence from MI5 about Iraqi WMDs" = totally 100% truthful. It's all just a student debating society game - only with a million dead.

Is it a bridge? Is it a ferry? No, it's the Newport Transporter

Re: "Decline and...

Visio Goths - are these the ones with the flowchart tattoos?

Re: Wind Strength

>Force 6 is technically a strong breeze.

Unless you are dangling on a large steel YoYo above a river

Re: "Decline and...

So you're saying all those cathedrals were really attempts to build Hot Topic stores ?

Danish artist pockets museum's cash and calls it art... and other stories

Radio4: Absolute Power

The money will be quietly given back at the end of the tax year, after the artist, the museum and a bunch of publicists have all got millions worth of PR out of this ?

'Quantum computer algorithms are linear algebra, probabilities. This is not something that we do a good job of teaching our kids'

Re: "Why not include critical thinking as well?"

>For a particular value of the word "average"

The most common first name is Mohammed

The most common surname is Zhang

Therefore the most common name is Mohammed Zhang (and not Ford Prefect)

>Teach linear algebra and probabilities?

You don't need to teach maths any more - everybody has a computer with them all the time !

IKEA: Cameras were hidden in the ceiling above warehouse toilets for 'health and safety'

Re: Safety

Child porn / human trafficking / illegal immigrants (delete as applicable)

Ransomware crim: Yeah, what I do is bad. No, I don't care. Yes, infosec bods are all mouth and no trousers

Re: And this...

No it's just safety at work 40 years ago (or now if you work construction)

Accidents happen, people get killed/injured, thoughts and prayers, nothing can be done, it's just one of those things, etc etc

Airline meal-sized £700k awarded by UK.gov for green aviation: That's for eco-tech rather than planes, mind

Re: Number crunching

So for a fraction of the overtime bill for a trip to a Paris climate accord meeting you get to be a "world leader" in "zero-emission aviation research"

Re: wireless charging for electric planes

> in-air wireless charging could be fun :)

Install wing-tip to wing-tip conductor in plane,

build large vertical copper coil

fly plane '1' through coil '2' at high speed.

And Lorentz is your uncle

co-chair of the Ministry of Defence/Offshore Wind Industry Council Air Defence Mitigation Task Force

And proud owner of the largest office door name-plate in the military

US school districts blame Amazon for nationwide bus driver shortage

Re: blamed for how little petrol you can get these days

If the current British government told you that there was no need to panic and there would be no shortage of something - what would be the logical thing to do ?

Re: neon-lit party bus complete with stripper poles had been hired

Matt Gaetz has entered the chat

Except to avoid the schools falling into innevitable Stalinism, the bus service is contracted out to "First".

Presumably because Crapita haven't worked out how to offshore it and G4S were too expensive

Re: Uhh...

>The resulting traffic jam at the school entrance would be untenable.

I assure you, the massed double parked Range Rovers and Cayenes blocking every street in my small town and the km long tailback onto the highway are very tenabled around the private school here.

Honest to Cthullu, statement overheard from one mother being forced to pickup her own sprog - "The nanny crashed the Maserati, again"

Re: Uhh...

>35 degree days with 90% humidity

Which is G*Ds way of telling you that humans shouldn't live there !

Re: similar

Bubble wrap at least

Re: Bus drivers...

>I'm sure hardened combat veterans would rather deal with the Taliban than teenage girls. Shudder.

I was suggesting hiring the Taliban - having defeated the USSR and US armies they should be upto the challenge, and they just got a free batch of Humvees and MRAPS

Capitalism would be to raise venture funding for a startup offering a network of autonomous AI powered scooters - then get sold for $Bn before actually delivering anything

Re: similar

Obviously you couldn't have a tube to each house, but a network of tubes branching off into the suburbs could allow you to drop off your offspring at the nearest neighbourhood funnel and have them flushed safely to school.

Might be a problem for the obese child, but any kid called "Augustus Gloop" is probably going to become a school shooter anyway.

Re: similar

Seems inefficient compared to series of pneumatic tubes

Re: Kayaking

Fit the Kayak with skis ?

Re: Bus drivers...

The British solution (to all problems) apparently is to get the army to do it.

Does the USA have a large military, suddenly unexpectedly free from previous engagements ?

Could they be retrained and re-equipped to deal with the much more dangerous environment of a US highschool?

Re: Uhh...

That's why school bus driver, especially out here away from the big city, is a retirement job.

Need to have a commercial licence and clean background check but only get to work 730:830 and 300:400 and 5 days/week * 30 weeks/year = not exactly a career path.

If it's going to rain within the next 90 mins, this very British AI system can warn you

>Nobody needs to know that there's a 82percent chance of rain at 18:57PM

Except for outdoors events, sportball and airports

'Extraordinary' pigs step in to protect Schiphol airport from marauding geese

Re: Pigs are …. ‘bivouacked’….?

Strange, since Pigs should have learned the drawbacks of insubstantial housing

Re: Schipholgans

Shredded and crispy fried presumably ?

Re: Hmmmm (or perhaps Hammm)....

>I'm not sure a jet engine will fare any better if it ingests a pig rather than a goose....

The virtue of the porcine species is that they are rarely (Pink Floyd excepted) sufficiently airborne to intersect with jet engines

Re: Useful fact

>The radio altimeter should never show a negative,

If the radio altimeter show a negative value - you are going to have a bad day

Asian central bank digital currency test cut cross-border transfer times 'from days to seconds'

In the biggest, richest and most developed economy

I get paid on Friday, some proportion gets transferred to my retirement account in the same financial institution and reaches there by Tuesday.

Years of development, millions of lines of code, and Android can't even run a toilet

Re: Not flushed with success

Presumably it can still take the piss even in this state?

Through the Looking Glass – holographic display hardware is great, but it's not enough

Re: It's not 3D

And it doesn't seem that different to lenticular displays on laptops 10years ago. They even had cameras to track the user and shift the display as you moved your head

A crypto-trading hamster is outperforming the S&P 500, Nasdaq, Bitcoin

But the success will go to his head (whiskers?), there will be parties, sunflower seed addiction and fancy wheels - and his performance will drop

If anyone can explain why Jupiter's Great Red Spot is spinning faster and shrinking, please speak up

Re: Reg Units

The extremely outer Hebrides ?

Re: Reg Units

Is Boris claiming Global Britain, definitive proof that the Earth is flat ?

Typical. Crap weather halts work on subsea fibre-optic cable between UK and France

Re: Tunnel

The natural enemy of fibres is idiots with JCBs

Railways attract idiots with JCBs

Stay away from railways

Don't touch that dial – the new guy just closed the application that no one is meant to close

Re: Timely tale in the UK

>isn't "sonic wave" just a "noise"?

Yes, but much more expensive

Re: Its the worst

Or you realize before you release the power button and desperately look around for someone to login and shutdown before your finger gets tired

Want to feel old? Aussie cyclist draws Nirvana baby in Strava on streets of Adelaide because Nevermind is 30

Re: 30 years ?

Sorry American phone autocorrect

Calculating the big picture: Future HPC efforts will soon see off its von Neumann past

Re: Do WHAT ‽ ‽

I can not solve unsolvable problems way faster than this