Posts by Scott 53

Final step to put new website into production deleted it instead

It's a Nisa outcome than I expected

ATM maintenance tech broke the bank by forgetting to return a key

Re: "all were re-assigned to work at other branches!"

So it wasn't his vault?

Crocs get the Xbox treatment with sole-crushing price of $80

Should have renamed them

Xbocs

Norks droning on about your dream job while pwning your PC

Norks

Perhaps you need a different nickname for the North Koreans. My mind took me in a very different direction.

Solid-gold nav bars? Trump plans redesign of government websites

Just when Mitchell and Webb are coming back

Picture the scene: two web designers chatting by the water fountain, wondering if they are the baddies. https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=VImnpErdDzA

Celebrating when EVs went to the Moon with a Lego Lunar Roving Vehicle build

Not disinterested participants

They would be uninterested. </pet_peeve>

Python script saw students booted off the mainframe for sending one insult too many

Did Matlab run on Amdahls?

This may be where the "Invalid use of operator" message came from.

Software support chap survived breaking his customer

Picking the data to delete

Back around the turn of the century, I'd often be asked to look at colleagues' Windows 95 machines - usually something simple like the disk being full. I remember being confronted with a machine like this, so deleted a load of temp files and emptied the Recycle Bin. Got a call later as the user had lost a file in their backup folder, namely the Recycle Bin. Taught me to ask in future, although I did of course roll my eyes at the idea of keeping important stuff there.

Help! My mouse climbed a wall and now it doesn't work right

Re: Wow

I do miss explaining to people that you need to use a static wrist strap when cleaning a mouse, as the last thing you want when handling the ball is a sudden discharge. I could keep a completely straight face while saying that.

Senate passes law forcing ByteDance to sell off TikTok – or face a US ban

Mother PFACAA

Absolutely classic subheading. Well done.

What's brown and sticky and broke this PC?

The user was left to set the time on her PC every day

Cruel and unusual punishment, surely.

'Crash test dummy' smashed VIP demo by offering a helping hand

Forget the helmet

Whose shirt was he wearing?

Five ripped off IT giant with $7M+ in bogus work expenses, prosecutors claim

Re: Lashings

Depending on the kind of "gentlemen's clubs" they frequented, there may have been lashings of lashings.

NASA engineers scratch heads as Voyager 1 starts spouting cosmic gibberish

Re: Have they tried

I remember someone taking the p*ss out of IT by saying all we do is tell people to "turn it on and off again". They were quite put out when I pointed out that left you with a device that definitely didn't work because it was turned off.

Millions of smart meters will brick it when 2G and 3G turns off

Re: Why smart meters ?

Smart meters can make your life easier if you are a prepayment customer. You can top up online and have things like government support payments applied to your meter without having to go to a shop to cash in a voucher.

Re: No corruption here.

> NO GOVERNMENT MANDATED EQUIPMENT WILL BE CONNECTED TO MY NETWORK! FFS

Smart meters do not connect to your home network. The whole point of the article is that they use 2G/3G.

Workload written by student made millions, ran on unsupported hardware, with zero maintenance

Could you add the "On-Call" label on the home page?

Teardown reveals iPhone 15 to be series of questionable design decisions

Re: Other side of the same coin

I assume a titanium bezzle is just an extremely reliable stage dancer.

Official science: People do less, make more mistakes on Friday afternoons

Actually...

It's probably OK to deploy code on a Friday, as long as it was written and reviewed earlier in the week.

'Weird numerological coincidence' found during work on Linux kernel 6.5

Re: I looked at that numerology web site

"consider number 2 as a sign that your angels have heard your cry"

That brings back some memories I'd rather repress.

Linux lover consumed a quarter of the network

Home page label

Could you tag the article with "Who, Me?" please? Took me a little while to find today's.

Bizarre backup taught techie to dumb things down for the boss

Recycle Bin is not permanent storage

I've seen more than one senior business person use the Recycle Bin to keep important documents in. Of course, emptying it was the first thing we did when they complained their disk was full. I did learn to ask first, eventually.

LG to offer subscriptions for appliances and televisions

Clothes drier settings

When it's raining, I put my clothes in the drier and it runs until the sensor detects they are dry. Then the drier stops drying. I think that setting should work just about anywhere, unless I'm missing something.

June Patch Tuesday: VMware vuln under attack by Chinese spies, Microsoft kinda meh

Can someone tell your article-writing AI...

that "uneventually" isn't a word.

Man sues OpenAI claiming ChatGPT 'hallucination' said he embezzled money

Re: > OpenAI shouldn't put out "AI" that consistently spews complete bullshit,

Sounds like some code branches need pruning.

First-known interstellar Solar System visitor 'Oumuamua a comet in disguise – research

'Oumuamua, 2I/Borisov, ...

They always come in threes

Take the morning off because Outlook has already

"Slack off"?

Slack on, more like.

Another RAC staffer nabbed for storing, sharing car crash data

Re: Grinding nomenclature

"Seafood solution" = bouillabaisse

Shag pile PC earned techies a carpeting from HR

Almost put their jobs on the lino.

Have we hit a climate tipping point? Green power attracts big money

Word choice

I think you should run the phrase "explosive nuclear growth" past someone in the communications team first.

Lockheed Martin demos 50kW anti-aircraft frickin' laser beam

Small arms?

They work well when attached to a jar of tomatoes https://www.businessinsider.com/kyiv-grandma-took-down-ussian-drone-with-jar-tomato-pickles-2022-3?r=US&IR=T Long arms would be even better

Publisher breaks news by using bots to write inaccurate stories

Re: No reply from CNET you say?

a comment in the style of amanfrommars

Fail. This was far too coherent.

Man wrongly jailed by facial recognition, lawyer claims

Re: Womens' status remains

"Odd"? Understatement. Should have been fixed by now (and never written in the first place).

Fraudulent ‘popunder’ Google Ad campaign generated millions of dollars

Never heard it called that before

The user is most likely busy minding their own business on the other active tab

Elon Musk to step down as Twitter CEO: Help us pick his replacement

Put Twitter out of its misery quickly

Liz Truss is the ideal candidate for that.

When we asked how you crashed the system we wanted an explanation not a demonstration

Re: A simple solution

This only works with BBBs - big black buttons labelled in black with a black background.

Victims of IT scandal in UK postal service will get fresh compensation

Re: Bollocks

I know lots of people who work at Fujitsu and this isn't mention in the company

I think if you worked at Fujitsu, mentioning this might be a career-limiting move. I remember reading Private Eye at my desk at lunchtime once and someone having a quiet word with me to mention that my employer had featured in it recently and it might be prudent to read it at home.

Job 1: Get the boss on the network. Job 2: Figure out why Job 1 broke the network for everyone else

The situation after this

The Chairman's iPad works here, but Walt disnae.

BOFH: We're an industry leader … in employing idiot managers

"Tin" of petrol?

Where are you from? I'm curious.

Just follow the instructions … no wait, not that instruction to lock everyone out of everything

Hopefully the documentation wasn't in The Sun...

Well things did go TITSUP (Total Inability To Support User Passwords)

Japan space agency blows up eight satellites aboard Epsilon rocket

Re: Sensitive image

"pass" - if they'd spelled it the English way (parse) it wouldn't have raised the flag.

What's Microsoft been up to? A quick tour of Windows 11 22H2's security features

Re: Nothing to do with....

What are cerfts?

Certificates issued by Vint Cerf himself?

Chemical plant taken offline by the best one of all: C₈H₁₀N₄O₂

Re: Ah, but what was the coffee?

That's a latte of bad coffee puns...

Most of them were thought of in an instant.

Re: Ah, but what was the coffee?

It's a shame the computer wasn't robusta.

Voyager 1 data corrupted by onboard computer that 'stopped working years ago'

Not any more

NASA and its engineers have done a stellar job

I think it's now interstellar.

BOFH and the case of the disappearing teaspoons

This work has already been done

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC1322240/

Scientists find gasses from Earth in rocks from early Moon

Re: Sounds sketchy

Wish granted

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/OSIRIS-REx

That emoji may not mean what you think it means

Re: Aubergine - but where is the Star Anise?

You, er, don't want to know what the star anise emoji will be used for.