Posts by MH Media

Is running IT for the Olympics the worst job in the world?

Re: obligatory

There's probably an Olypmic event for that.

Bad generator and bugs take out Amazon cloud

Re: They should make their own power

Yeah, maybe a personal nuclear power station would be handy.

RBS collapse details revealed: Arrow points to defective part

Should've

.. stuck to CRON (cron)

Natwest, RBS: When will bank glitch be fixed? Probably not today

Re: Out-sourcing is bad

From experience, up until now they'll have been able to read through prepared sheets of instructions created by the people they replaced. Now they've had to make a (probably small) change on their own and have come horribly unstuck. Lessons will be learned..

Met bobbies get CSI kit to probe perps' mobes

Re: Problem is...

Reasonable ground..

The problem is that a number of Councils in the UK have thought that it was "reasonable grounds" to invoke RIPA when they suspected that us council tax payers were illegally overloading bins or sneaking dogs out to Parks in the early hours to avoid the dog poo wardens. I can't imagine the average plod will be any different..

Does Britain really need a space port?

Of *course* we do, and there's only man for the job..

I'm, talking about Boris Johnson of course!

After all, this guy has managed to erect (can I say that?) a cablecar across the Thames before you could say "plannngpermission", and is well on his way to building an airport. What better way to compliment this aspiring Space Cadet other than by asking him to build a structure that will propel Britain to the Moon, or even Uranus. Or Cameron's.

Screw the recession - that's for Johnny Foreigner and His Euro-buddies! Let's put the Great back in Britain!

At last! A use for Blighty's phone-boxes: Free Wi-Fi hotspots

Re: Don't knock the old phone boxes!

> they don't even stink of smoke any more!

No, normally it's cider, either raw, or, er, recycled.

Microsoft makes good with a 23-fix Patch Tuesday

Oh B*LL*CKS! I just set up an old laptop for my Mother-in-law so she could be an occasional Internet user, going online with her PAYG USB dongle.

Perhaps I should invest in a second data plan just for the F***** updates!!!

London Olympics 'not immune' to cyber attack

"a crack team has been set up dedicated to guarding the Games against attack"

That'll be a group of NEETs trained to pull the cables out of the routers/switches if the lights start flashing too quickly.

That'l be part of an Apprenticship scheme which of course will lead to a well-paid job in computing.

Re: will not be immune to cyber attack ...

Or connected via CAT5?

Theresa May: No emails sniffed in web super-snoop law

Re: So what are these new communication methods?

I was going to say "whispering in the ear of the listener", but I wouldn't be surprised if the buggers had a whole department of highly-trained lip readers monitoring CCTV..

Dot-London squeaks under ICANN deadline

London is not the only fruit

Why should London get all the perks? I'm looking forward to seeing .scunthorpe, .penistone and especially .llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwllllantysiliogogogochuchaf TLDs.

Concerns over plan to boost pharma by releasing NHS data

Horsefeathers

""The public must be assured that the release of data is controlled by robust processes and legal and ethical oversight in which the patients themselves are involved"

This one phrase, uttered by someone in Government, or someone representing someone in Government is a cast-iron guarantee that my personal data is not safe.

Hackers commandeer US government satellites

You've had your chips, mate

Hmmm.. Aren't most of the worlds electronic chips sourced from China?

BBC One and bureaucracy spared in Auntie cuts

It's a sad day when you come into work at the Beeb and find out you've been replaced by an Excel macro..

Amazon's Silk looks creepily Phorm-ulaic

Easily understood

..don't understand why... Our regulators and politicians tolerate this

Because neither of these expensively-financed numpty squads have got a clue about the technical side. This is why we keep reading about millions of ciizens data being lost on CDs, or filing cabinets buried in landfill sites.

The regulators have no teeth because they're driven/steered by the politicians.

1-in-3,200 chance* that a fiery satellite chunk will hit someone on Friday

Feck!

No doubt some enterprising "traveller" family will try and sell it back to NASA for 6 million quid.

Prime Minister recalls holidaying MPs after London riots

It woz Colonel Sandess what done it!

Scotland Yard has begun publishing a gallery of rogues captured on CCTV overnight. It's so far posted 15 images on Flickr

The usual rubbish CCTV pix (another procurement farce?) and the clearest image is that of Colonel Sanders, maniacly grinning in his usual style. He needs to be arrested. Pronto!

The cloud and the incredible shrinking office

ATM

“HSBC recently said up to 40 per cent of its staff could be home based, and there’s a push in London to get people to work from home during the Olympics. "It will be interesting to see how that plays out"

Will that include some staff having ATMs "fitted" in the front of their house?

Baidu rejigs business units, operations boss quits

Hoorah!

As a grumpy webmaster I'm sincerely hoping that the new Head Honcho has read the guide to robots.txt and will now implement it! What part of "Disallow: /" do these people not understand??

El Reg pays by phone – mmmm, free cookies!

Ditto

.. and wait until your granny tries the same thing, but with her non-NFC-enabled phone! It'll be on Waterloo Station, rush-hour peak, WHS and she'll have a bag of humbugs and a copy of the Peoples Friend. And no money o course ;-)

C'mon now guys!

"One was a chemist, but as we weren't yet feeling ill "

Something for the weekend sir?

Almost entire EU now violating Brussels cookie privacy law

Maybe

Maybe we should report Number 10 to the ICO or whatever numpty Eurocommittee is handling this farce.

Email in the cloud

Gee thanks..

Maybe I can get Ops to fit me a sound card so I can listen to these pearls of wisdom? C'mon, is the age of transcription dead?

Teenage duo sentenced over credit card Ghostmarket

Yeh but

Let me ask you - how would you feel if you discovered that your credit card had been skimmed for £2,185? Or how about being laid off from your job while your employer rebuilt the business following a hacking attack?

Oz boffins in quantum computing breakthrough

.. computer says no..

Yeah, but can it run an unhackable Sony Playstation Network?! FFS!!

Echelon computers can't cope with bad lines

Nooooo

Terrorists with James Blunt playing in the background ..

Gov tempts young London onto ID database with booze, 'games'

How did the BBC

.. find out he was the first victim/sucker? Not very secure data protection is it?

Inside Microsoft's innovation crisis

It's innovation..

.. but the Microsoft way..

Google to mobile industry: ‘F*ck you very much!’

Serves the telcos right!

For years they've been cozy little closed shops who've dictated policy to suit themselves (obviously) and controlled the show with their infamous Walled Gardens. Now its payback time: bring it on Google!

Please shut up about the Mull of Kintyre Chinook crash

Trial ?

"Cook and Tapper the benefit of the doubt - not that they are being tried for any criminal offence"

No, they have been tried by the Media and Politicians - far worse than any Courts Martial or civil judiciary. Hopefully these new (as in newly presented) revelations will osrt the matter out properly, once and for all.

Welcome to the out-of-control decade

Not right now but..

.. when the bean-counters truly believe that they'll (a) never run out of drive space again, (b) all the data's held in a secure location and constantly backed up, and (c) it costs "far less than we're paying now" then of course they'll use every opportunity to move the company's crown jewels into the Cloud.

I know people that think like this! (and no, I don't believe a,b or c)

It's the end of TV as we know it

Hoorah! (Possibly)

If it really *is* the end of TV as we know it then bring it on - the Xmas TV offering (not that we watched much at all) was so dreadful that we just switched off and went back to our DVD collection.

If it means that we get to watch such quality programmes as "East Enders Christmas Special" in June, on whatever Internet-capable device I have to hand, then they can forget it.

Escaped con regularly updates Facebook fan page

Fail!

""We have spoken to Facebook and we are trying to trace him from the information we have, but it's one of those things that we're also asking for help from members of the public"

Ok, so imagine this was a terrorist suspect with underpants primed and ready to go. Our noddy Police service can't find him even though they've spoken to Facebook? We're stuffed!

National space agency for Blighty, says Drayson

Lets send

.. Mandelson up as a test pilot - first stop .. Uranus!

Music industry website debut turns into a mosh pit

Location Location Location

> If you'd like to be informed when VEVO is available in your country,

> please submit your email address.

Tossers! This sounds like the DVD region code thing all over again. Nothing to see here - move along.

Durham police demonstrate DNA will stuff you

Yes, but..

I agree, but I get the impression that the police would DNA swab you anyway ("just routine sir"), and then release you without charge when it's found to be a harmless substance.

LHC pulverises previous record: 2.36 TeV surprise collision!

Luddites R Us

Okay, so call me a Luddite, but .. they've managed to get a result, so how exactly does this benefit mankind? In real terms. No flames please!

Google slaps barcodey stickers on Favourite Places

At last !!!

This is great news - I've been playing around with this system ever since it came out, so its gratifying to see someone using it. The problem up until now has been that it requires a software download to your phone, and I understand the majority of punters can't or won't do this. Now that someone as big as Google's involved, handset manufacturers will hopefully get a clue and pre-install it.

@g e .. how about using the barcode to access a web page that lets you check stock/order stuff when the shop's closed?