Posts by Big_Boomer

America's anti-hacking laws are so loose, even Donald Trump Jr broke them. So, what do we do about it?

Duuuuuuuuhhhh

Government by the stupid and selfish, for the stupid and selfish. I guess that fits.

If you down-vote me you get to choose if you are stupid, selfish, or even both <LOL>

NOMEX suit on! :-)

Parents slapped with dress code after turning school grounds into a fashion crime scene

Re: Sowfend?

I live just down the road and it's Saaaaaaffff-end according to all the North-Thames-Estuarians. Lakeside Shopping Centre is in Fffurruck. Don't believe what you see on TOWIE, they are all from Brentwood/Billericay area which is posh.

US firm wins Oz-backed bid to block Huawei from subsea Pacific cables

Typical bullies!

Sounds like the neighbourhoods 2 biggest bullies are gearing up for a shin-kicking bout. Anyone game to spike their pre-bout drinks with laxatives and emetics? Could be messy, but it would be ****ing hilarious!

Two Arkansas dipsticks nicked after allegedly taking turns to shoot each other while wearing bulletproof vests

Re: Definite Darwin Award winner in the making

Correct, AND only if you die having not reproduced and thus removed your genetic code from Homo Sapiens.

Hams try to re-carve the amateur radio spectrum in fight over open or encoded transmissions

Common Sense?

Encryption has a variety of purposes and shouldn't just be knee-jerk banned. However, AMATEUR radio is not to be used for commercial purposes under any circumstances, so something encrypted that is using that much bandwidth warrants investigation. If found to be commercial, then you prosecute the offenders.

Here in the UK if there are suspicions of commercial activity on any Ham bands, then you report it and it gets investigated. I had an issue many moons ago with severe interference on 2m and reported it after some initial investigation and logging. 2 weeks later I was informed that the pirate FM station operating very close to my house with his cheap poorly made transmitter and homemade antenna had been shutdown, and whaddya know the interference was gone.

As for the negative comments about Hams, if you are too stupid to understand a technical hobby, then why do you feel you have to insult and belittle those who do understand and enjoy it? Grow up moron!

Brit Parliament online orifice overwhelmed by Brexit bashers

USE vs USA

This seems to me to be the choices we have. Many seem to believe that we still have an Empire and that we can go it alone in the 21st century, but it's pretty evident that we don't and can't, not and retain our economic standing. Personally I would choose USE over USA every day, not that I don't like citizens of the USA but I definitely don't like their politics, or healthcare, or their willingness to let 25,000+ people get shot dead every year just so they can keep their guns. That last demonstrates an amazing lack of empathy for their fellow man.

Either way I see these Brexit negotiations as the death throes of the UKs parliamentary system, and good ****ing riddance!!

So about that Atari reboot console... you might want to sit down. It's going to be late, OK?

More money than sense

So, you spaffed your money on yet another rehash of ancient games (that were mostly crap even when they were new) that you with your rose tinted specs have elevated to near mythical status? Well, if that is the case can I interest you in a Commodore Pet replica on which you will be able to run Lander, Space, Artillery, and even Time Trek. It will cost a mere £2000 and we will require less than half of that to reserve your machine for you. It will be based on the Intel Bullshitium processor and the Lyinx operating system and all you have to do to reserve your copy is to send £999.99 to [e-mail]

Or, you could just download an emulator and run them on any old piece of kit (https://www.commodore.ca/commodore-gallery/commodore-pet-games/) :D

Overhyped 5G is being 'rushed', Britain's top comms boffin reckons

Unimpressed

We keep hearing about these next-best-things and they are almost inevitably a disappointment. I rarely get true 4G speeds (O2 network) and those times when I need good data speeds via a cell I am in a massive huddle of other users with overloaded cells and/or awful back-haul, normally in a traffic jam on the M25. It does me no good at all to have 4G when I'm at home/work as then I use WiFi. Marketing types have gasp-gasms over stuff like 5G but it's almost all hot air and spin and there is no real substance to their claims when they hit the real world. Yes, 4G is faster than 3G, and 3G is faster than GPRS, but that is of no help at all if you can't get 5/4/3G and are always on GPRS because the network can't provide enough capacity for the users/bandwidth. I would say to the networks to get their sh!t together and sort out their data coverage first, and when that is done then they can discuss bringing in the next techno-gasm. Give us what we are already paying for before you expect us to buy something new!

Re: Well then

Here is a suggestion/experiment for you. Try ONLY using your phone for phone calls. Nothing else, only phone calls, and see how long your battery lasts. I did just that and my Honor 9's 3200mAh battery lasted nearly 9 days before it died. Now to be fair I don't make/take that many calls but the best non-smartphone I ever had for longevity (Sony Ericsson W800i) lasted less than 5 days. If you are one of those who just can't survive unless you are checking Face/Twit/Snap/Inst every 10 secs then you will just have to get into the habit of charging your phone every night. If you can't manage a whole day on a charge, then maybe you need to put the damned phone down and get a life?

Click here to see the New Zealand livestream mass-murder vid! This is the internet Facebook, YouTube, Twitter built!

It was obvious this was going to happen!

I said to my better half when Facebook introduced Live Streaming, that it would be used by a terrorist to stream atrocities within a year or 2, and I was wrong. It took 2 years and 2 months. This kind of access to an audience is too tempting to damaged scum like him, and it WILL get used again for this kind of thing as the supply of damaged scum is endless. The social media companies need to be held to account. If they propagate this kind of material then they should be fined every penny they earned from it x10. Then when they are losing money on this hate mongering shite, maybe they will put something in place to keep it off their systems. Any bets whether this instance will lead to a change in their policies? Or will it require another live streamed atrocity before they get off their arses and either drop all live streaming, or else find an effective way of policing it.

How many Reg columnists does it take to turn off a lightbulb?

Black Duct Tape

Carried everywhere with me. Great for disabling sensors and in one hotel room I covered over the one remaining halogen bulb that would not die. It subsequently overheated and burned out. Happy days :-)

As for ageing and software, I am still using a version of Paint Shop Pro 7 I bought in 2001. Works fine in Win10 and does what I need.

Bombs Huawei... Smartphone exploded in my daughter's pocket, seriously burning her, claims dad in lawsuit

Conspiracy

Huawei again? It's a CONSPIRACY! Ban anything Chinese from entering the western hemisphere at once. Oh wait, are ANY smartphones actually made in the USA any more? No, guess it's Korean/Taiwanese for y'all from now on. <LOL>

Science says death metal fans delightful and intelligent people, great at dinner parties

Re: Not surprising

Skyclads violinist Fritha was a super hot fiddler, in so many ways. :-)

Carcass had the most disgusting song titles

Yes, I know, I've been told I'm "old school" but I've been a fan of Death Metal since way back in the late 80s when everyone else was into Hair Metal. Thrash is fun too, but Death is where the meat is :-) Nile make for a good "earworm" killer. No matter what pop twaddle gets in my head, a quick blast of "Rameses -God of War" soon sorts that out. For me the same holds for Bolt Throwers "World Eater".

There are A-holes in any group of people, but I reckon that Death metalloids get their anger out of their system vocally rather than physically :-) I know that every car that gets in front of mine gets treated to non stop descriptions of their drivers dubious ancestry and sexual deviations. Ya can't beat seeing the expression on someones face when in a traffic jam they pull alongside my Lexus limo-barge and look across at it's grey haired, overweight driver while he is singing along to Grave's "Into the Grave" and headbanging. <LOL>

Never thought we'd ever utter these words, but... can anyone recommend a spin doctor for NASA?

Doofuses!

Of course the fact that it's slowly losing it's volatiles and becoming more dense couldn't possibly explain the increase in spin? Think of a figure skater who pulls their arms in.

Sure, we've got a problem but we don't really want to spend any money on the tech guy you're sending to fix it

A friend used to work for a vehicle security supplier. One Saturday he got a call from a difficult customer whose Jag refused to restart after he had stopped at some motorway services, and he wanted one of their people to come and sort it out RIGHT NOW! So, my friend decided to take his 10 year old son with him and drove half way around the M25 to get to the customer. On arrival he discovered that the customer was using the security system correctly, but had his cars automatic gearbox in Drive. He put his foot on the brake, moved it to Park, and hey presto the car started. At this point his son piped up LOUDLY "Dad, did we just come halfway round the M25 on your day off to put someones car into Park?". My friend wisely swallowed his laughter, stayed silent and sent the customer on his way. He later billed him for half a days travel and work and the bill was paid with no complaints.

Silent Merc, holy e-car... Mflllwhmmmp! What is that terrible sound?

Fit people sensors and when it senses a person it shouts "Prepare to DIE Human scum!"

Re: Ringtones for cars

Yup, the afterburners were added for the TSR2 and Concorde.

Two in five 'AI startups' essentially have no AI, mega-survey of nearly 3,000 upstarts finds

VC to supplicant " So, your product uses AI does it? You do realise that we now check all submissions by use of our Anal Insertion probe?"

Supplicant <out the door so fast even Usain Bolt couldn't catch him>

I never told them my age as was never asked. Was 6'4" at 14 so that may have been why <LOL>

USB4: Based on Thunderbolt 3. Two times the data rate, at 40Gbps. One fewer space. Zero confusing versions

Lemmy!

To paraphrase one of his favourite sayings "Can we have everything faster than everything else?"

Personally I can't wait until my Quantum PC can instantaneously move an infinite amount of data to my infinite capacity Quantum storage device via USB-Q. :-)

Prodigy dancer and vocalist Keith Flint found dead aged 49

RIP Keith

I got to meet him and ride around north Essex with him a few times in the mid 90's. Not many who could stay with him on the Dunmow to Finchingfield to Braintree roads but then it was his home turf. No "rockstar ego" to him at all and a genuine nice guy with a wicked sense of humour. The intro to Firestarter has been my cellphone ringtone since the first phone where ya could use MP3s (I think it was the Nokia N95) and I will remember him whenever someone phones me.

Why are there never free power sockets when my Y-fronts need charging?

ElectroSkundies

And what happens if you bought the Note 7 skundies? Just how fast can you rip those skundies off when the inevitable blaze kicks off, in public, on the steps down to Victoria Station Underground, in the rush-hour? <LOL> I think I'll give that a miss along with most of the so called wearable-computing rubbish. I like having a nice discrete device that I can dispose of rapidly if necessary, especially one that contains 40,000 Joules.

Vodafone exec dons tartan tam-o'-shanter, clutches bottle of Irn-Bru, in snap shared with firm... just before Glasgow staff told of redundo dates

Vodafone staff member did what?

<LOL> <ROTFLOL> <ROTFLMAO> Oh I am so glad I have sod all to do with Voda**** these days. They don't seem to have heard of the the mantra "Under-promise, Over-deliver". Even BT are starting to look professional compared that that shower. ;-)

We're not throttling you, says Vodafone, claiming slow vid streaming is down to the 'cards'

Vodafone performance?

VODAFONE? PERFORMANCE? <snigger> <lol> <rotflol> <rotflmao> <rotfpmsl> oh gawd, please stop,.... it hurts......

Watchdog asks UK.gov to reissue freedom of information guidance after councils are told to STFU about Brexit plans

No Deal official guidance

"In the event of a No Deal all government officials at all levels will momentarily withdraw their heads from their arses, look around, squeak like frightened mice, and promptly reinsert head where it normally lives. Under no circumstances should any of you admit anything about anything to anyone"

Eggheads want YOU to name Jupiter's five newly found moons ‒ and yeah, not so fast with Moony McMoonface

The Famous Five?

Julian, Dick, Anne and Georgina – and their dog Timmy. Then the astros get to fist-fight over who gets Dick and who gets Timmy.

Re: Every language and culture

Nah, that's Jupiler and it's a beer.

Germany tells America to verpissen off over Huawei 5G cyber-Sicherheitsbedenken

They're in your BRAIN!!!

Yup, USA, Russia, China, EU, UK,... and even the Andorrans are ALL spying on you (I'll bet most of you Yanks had to check on where the **** Andorra is <LOL>). Better to be paranoid and live in a shed in the middle of nowhere with your tinfoil hat on. The whole Huawei thing always was a trade war and has nothing to do with security or backdoors, although the US are probably bigging it up as they are undoubtedly STILL guilty of doing EXACTLY that, despite the NSA revelations. Yes, the US and EU is rightly afraid of the economic might of China but using obvious bullsh!t to justify your actions just makes you look like a dumb****! This is just another turn around the mulberry bush as the US economic influence fades whilst that of China grows. In 50 years time it'll be Indonesia or India vs China.

Use an 8-char Windows NTLM password? Don't. Every single one can be cracked in under 2.5hrs

Security SUX

All these passwords are a PITA to remember & manage, even with password managers, yet despite this nobody has managed to come up with a viable secure replacement for them. Bio-metrics seems to have died away (apart from fingerprint login on your phone) and so called face recognition is very insecure since it's dead easy to fool. Besides, once someone manages to hack your Bio-metrics, you are well and truly f***ed!

Perhaps it's time to go back to a physical device coupled with questions and answers. The physical device is personal (ring, watch, rfid card) and it identifies you, but when you login it asks questions only you know the answer to. Now you just have to remember the answers to your questions and most importantly not give that info away on FaceTwit. If you lose your device it can be replaced and new logins can be setup. If you are the kind of moron who loses stuff all the time, then you get the device embedded in your body with a nail-gun :-)

Return of the audio format wars and other money-making scams

Laser Ripper?

Didn't someone come up with a laser scanner that could read a whole vinyl LP at once and convert it to the digital storage format of your choice? Whatever happened to that?

I tried using one of those record player/ripper things and the process is painful beyond measure. It doesn't separate the tracks, it doesn't stop/start automatically, and you have to sit there and watch it while it does it's thing. BORED!! I did the 15 LPs I cared the most about and then gave up and just re-ordered those that I could in digital format (CD or MP3), and only used it for those of my vinyls that are not available in digital format.

As for the audiophiles, to each their hobby but don't bore me with it or I will retaliate by going into intricate detail about the rebuild of my 1989 Kawasaki engine. I am 55 years old and in my teens I used to tune unsilenced 2-stroke mopeds in a small garage (ahh the smell of Castrol-R!), so these days I struggle to hear above 14kHz. Therefore your £Gazillion audio system is a waste of money to me, but if it gets you off, enjoy!!

Bloke thrown in the cooler for eight years after 3D-printing gun to dodge weapon ban

The USA loves it's guns

Get over it. They are not going to give up their guns. The press here keep reporting on the massacres that seem to occur every other day over there as if they are something new, when they are not. The USA seems to accept those massacres as the price of universal gun ownership, so we should leave them to it and stop reporting it here.

Roses are red, so is ketchup, 'naked' Huawei tells its critics to belt up

USA vs China

Personally, I wouldn't trust either of these. The NSA seemed to have all kinds of backdoors and such if the recent release of their stuff is to be believed so I assume GCHQ are trying to catch up.

Nah, I trust countries, companies, groups, associations and affiliates about as far as I can throw a main battle-tank. Individuals can sometimes be trusted but even then not always.

Samsung Galaxy's flagship leaks ... don't matter much. Here's why

Twenty-Teens

It's the Tenties, not Twenty-Teens!! Eighties, Nineties, Noughties, Tenties, and in 10½ months time it will be the Twenties. As for yet another overpriced, overhyped phone for those muppets who just have to have a phone that is "Considerably better than yows",... yawn! I'll stick to a nice cheap mid-range that does more than I need anyways. Nothing on any of these flagship models from any brand are worth the extra they are charging for them.

A once-in-a-lifetime Opportunity: NASA bids emotional farewell to its cocky, hardworking RC science car on Mars

RIP Opportunity

So, we've had Spirit, Opportunity, Curiosity, and the next Rover will also be named by a school kid.

https://www.space.com/41920-nasa-contest-name-2020-mars-rover.html

I wonder if we'll end up with Rover McRoverFace or more likely something like FinanceMyF***ingWallYouB***ards! if Fartus gets his say.

One click and you're out: UK makes it an offence to view terrorist propaganda even once

Stupid morons

And entering from stage right are a wide variety of people publicly posting a variety of links pointing to "illegal-to-view-just-once" terrorist documents with such names as HowToGetNakedBritneyPics.txt so that just about every click-happy moron in the country becomes a criminal. Welcome to HMP United Kingdom.

Trolling in the Reg's forums... we mean, er, 'working' on the train still rubbish thanks to patchy data coverage

Backhaul

The really crazy thing about this is that a lot of UKs backhaul passes through fibres running alongside the rail lines. Yes, just feet from your windows there is a bundle of fibres carrying many many TB/s of data but you can't get at it. Pretty soon the train companies will wise up and start offering 5G in each carriage so you can watch your personal choice of drivel whilst travelling. As for people doing work on trains, you are not as common as you think. Most of us relish the downtime away from the "always available" society. Personally whilst on the train I often put my phone on silent because I don't want to speak to anyone, put the headphones in, crank up some Nile or other Technical Death Metal, and bury my head in a good Sci-Fi novel. People tend to leave you alone when yer grunting "There is no God..." in time with the tagline in "Kafir". :D

HMRC: We 'rigorously tested' IR35 tax-check tool... but have almost nothing to show for it

Typical

Chances are that HMRC hired a contractor to create CEST, but as usual decided to terminate their contract early due to some utterly irrelevant government initiative, and so ended up with nobody who understood the software, how to use it, or even exactly what it was intended for.

But, because some bureaucrats job is now on the line (the one who used that government initiative to get rid of the contractor and make it look like they were saving the taxpayer some money) it got released as a Beta even though it is probably not even at first Alpha stage. One of the many reasons I won't work with public sector entities any more.

You got a smart speaker but you're worried about privacy. First off, why'd you buy one? Secondly, check out Project Alias

I like it :-)

No, I don't have a SnoopySpeaker in my life, but the idea of the programmable Pi-Snot being able to play what I decide I want it to hear appeals to me. Probably an endless loop of their own adverts. As for the activation phrase, obviously it would be "Oi PFY,.....", although "Oi, f***wit,....." would also be tempting.

How big is the UK space industry? It hauled in £14.8bn for 2016/2017 – report

Brex-shit

I am almost looking forward to the aftermath of Brexit. I'm going to enjoy saying "Told you so" and "You f***ing voted for it!" over and over for many many years. However, the redundancies will not be along leave/remain lines so many who voted remain will still get shafted. And before anyone starts in on the fact that they won and remoaners should shut up and live with it, go vote yourself a second brain cell!

Canadians moot methods to embiggen moose monument and make Mac great again

Re: Go on, laugh

Don't forget Shitterton, Loose Bottom, Crapstone, Penistone, Cockermouth, good old Nasty, and many many more. The colonies don't have a monopoly on daft place names ya know.

As for the statues, the solution is obvious, Canada has the largest Moose statue, and Norway has the largest Elg statue. As for the biggest Moose/Elk/Elg/лось, the largest is probably a toss up between the Alaskan Moose and the лось or Alces alces buturlini that lives in Siberia. So once again USA vs Russia :-)

I studied hard, I trained for years. Yay, now I'm an astronaut in space. Argggh, leukemia!

Cause and Effect

Undoubtedly the genius scientists investigating this haven't thought about the fact that living in a sterile environment means that the body needs less HK cells, and therefore produces less HK cells? Reminds me of overly protective mothers who sterilise everything continuously and yet can't understand why their little darlings end up with every allergy under the sun. We humans are designed to live in a bacteria/virus infested miasma, so putting us in any kind of sterile environment is counter productive. That said, before man can live away from this planet for extended periods, we need to get better radiation shielding or else just accept the increase in mutations in ourselves and our biosphere.

Apple: You can't sue us for slowing down your iPhones because you, er, invited us into, uh, your home... we can explain

PWNED

What? You thought Apple loved you? Bwahahahahaha, Apple loves your MONEY, but never you.

Nothing 'unites teams' like a good relocation, eh Vodafone?

Relocation sux

Been through this too many times, sufficient that now when I'm told I'm being relocated, I relocate myself to a different job.

I can understand some moves, but many of those that I have had forced upon me were simply to make the new CEOs commute easier.

I worked for a company in the late 90s that was bought out and a new CEO installed who lived in St Albans. The company was based in Basildon, but within 6 months was relocated to Watford. A mere 12 months later and 90% of the staff had left taking with them years of experience and about half of our customers. I myself relocated to the Watford area but 3 years later moved back to Essex and ended up working with many of my former collegues.

My advice to any company considering relocation, make certain you have rational reasons for the relocation, and count on losing all of your experienced staff, as they are the ones who find it easiest to get another job.

Man drives 6,000 miles to prove Uncle Sam's cellphone coverage maps are wrong – and, boy, did he manage it

Surely if the providers are lying about coverage and data speeds, those who have a contract with them can sue, or at worst have the contract declared void.

I ditched Vodafone here because their coverage was awful in the 2 places I used it most (home and work) but their support people swore blind that their coverage in both areas was excellent. They then offered to let me buy a £60 microcell to compensate for their crap coverage at which point I moved to Tesco (O2) and now enjoy decent coverage nearly everywhere. Voda have since improved their coverage for my home area, so I guess it wasn't as "excellent" as they claimed after all.

Forget your deepest, darkest secrets, smart speakers will soon listen for sniffles and farts too

Alexa/Google This!

<sounds of a smartspeaker being pounded into dust with a large lump hammer> :-)

To be honest, you already have a several devices in your house that can listen to you whenever some spook wants to. Landline phones, cellphones, laptops and tablets all have built in microphones. However, giving access to marketers is insanity. Like we don't already get deluged in ad crap already!!!

Thanks to UK peers, coming to a laptop near you in 2019: Age checks for online smut

The problem with modern tech is that the kids mostly understand it, and the parents mostly don't, so the kids will run rings around any restrictions the parents try to impose. As for this porn check thing, it won't work, it'll end up being just another instance in the long line of "restrictive" measures introduced by governments. After all making Cannabis illegal worked just great didn't it, and the restrictions on under 18s getting fags and booze seem to be working,..... oh no they're not working either. For those worried about it, get a new Credit Card, use that for the AVS and for nothing else, so when you get charged on that card you will know EXACTLY who to sue. :-)

Doom: The FPS that wowed players, gummed up servers, and enraged admins

I ran W3D on a 20Mhz 286 (MSDOS 6.22 & WfW3.11) that I had chip upgraded (yes, before Memory Modules) to 4Mb RAM. A friend gave me a hacked version of EMM386 called EMM286 that allowed it to access that RAM. W3D ran fine and it would run Doom, but only if you were willing to put up with pauses every so often (and frequent crashes). Replaced it with a 486sx25 (W95) that ran Doom fine and many many hours of fun were had running lan games over a 10base2 network. I remember running GodMode and bouncing all over the place by firing the rocket launcher at my feet <LOL>. Better yet was when the console version of Doom was released and the inevitable bloodbath as the crappy console controllers were no match for seasoned Doomers using keyboard and mouse,.... or was that Quake,.... damn getting old sux! :-)

Supernovae may explain mass extinctions of marine animals 2.6 million years ago

Opportunity missed

What was wrong with the headline "Megalodon f**ked by gang-bang" :-)

Australia's 'snoop minister' wants crypto-busting law probe wound up, proposals back into parliament

WooooOOOooooooo,.,.. Boogeyman!!!

Be afraid of everything! Your fear gives me power,... power to control THE DARK SIDE OF THE FORCE!!!

But then the morons of the world do seem to keep on electing these manipulative self-centred scumbag ass-feeders into government. And no, it's not just Australia/USA/UK, it's everywhere!!