* Posts by HRH Martin

13 publicly visible posts • joined 15 Sep 2009

Fukushima one week on: Situation 'stable', says IAEA

HRH Martin
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Love to el reg

The Reg's serious attempt to cut through the shite have been much appreciated here. Where I live, yesterday some fucksocket editor headlined a daily national paper with '"It's time to pray - Nuke Expert". Truly insulting, denigrating and disgusting.

I remain convinced that the only devil here is the Japanese winter. You could get hysterical, or you can do the best thing possible and kick some cash to a relief agency feeding and clothing the hundred of thousands of people who have lost their homes and possessions.

Asian soup peril menaces bionic shark

HRH Martin

Just not in the mood for Anonymous Cowards 'Too Many Mouths' evils of man...

apocalypse is coming, eco-rapture hysterics. People have got to make a living, and no doubt a susbsistence living fishing for hammerheads. The alternative being ... no paying work?

As a greenie I am ashamed of and tired of all those devilish and pure/natural/organic types and the damage they do to economies, food supply and public attitudes.

Anyway, what's a few bowls of soup when soft headed 'natural health' ****s are wolfing down shark cartilage under the illusion it protects against cancer?

NO-SH*T CURE FOR BALDNESS discovered by accident

HRH Martin
Stop

Obviously someone with a full head of a hair

F**k sorting out cancer and the cold, this is the SHIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Ecstasy doesn't make rave-goers any stupider - official

HRH Martin
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If you don't like raves watch one day cricket instead

What a day! My team put 240 on the board, then in the break between innings Sir Peter Jackson recorded us stomping and grunting for audio FX for LOTR, then my boys bowled England out for 90.

So full of 'love' for the world rang dad and gave him a rather garbled and excited live commentary from the game though. You've gone and made me all nostalgic... I wonder if i still have ******** number?

Channel Five reborn as Channel Five

HRH Martin
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Smut Puddling?

I think you meant smut peddling, but smut puddling is way better!

Don’t Look Now hailed top Brit movie

HRH Martin
Happy

A pretty good list

Seen a decent bunch of them and enjoyed them. The main reason I like this list is that, unlike those cum bubbles in Oscar land, the compilers have actually seen the films they've voted on.

US Air Force studies fruit-flies to build killer insect swarm drones

HRH Martin

Query to subeditor

you seem to have deleted the para mentioning DARPA's involvement, please correct and repost.

LOST Vulture One PARIS spaceplane FOUND!!!

HRH Martin

Well done

Well done!

Now, given all you've achieved with so little, have you thought about bidding for MoD contracts?

Fruitcake profs demand strict curbs on killer robots

HRH Martin

Lewis is frothing at the mouth. Still no cure for that? Oh dear...

Lewis,

Dr Sparrow is not an expert in male pregnancy, because there is no such thing as male pregnancy - and for **** sake learn to read, and do your research!

Still, a man giving birth - I'd pay to watch that, but only if Ridley Scott is the midwife.

On a more important note, our community robot mutinied and refused to obey my command, "insufficient funds" my arse. Kill them all.

UN appoints alien liaison boffin

HRH Martin

As any fool knows...

the measure of any species is not their high tech tools, ability to open a bottle of beer, or con scientists out of extra food, but what they taste like: See cows, pigs, sheep, pigeons, dolphins, salmon and humans.

I for one have total confidence in Malaysian cuisine to deliver us a delicate, yet satisfying first contact.

Whatever happens, don't let the Americans get involved - their crimes against steak mean they should be kicked off the UN BBQ Council immediately.

Radical hypersonic glider vanishes above Pacific

HRH Martin

I think I may have seen it's final moments (or maybe not)

Last week, I was outside having a pre bedtime benson & hedges watching the night sky as I like to do - living in New Zealand a with the lesser night pollution means you get to see to some cool stuff like the milky way 'cloud', meteors and satellites - last week when a burst of red light (circular in shape) popped in the night sky for half a second.

Now I can't remember what night it was,have no clue whether launch times and flight-plan sync up or what a hypersonic vehicle burning up looks like etc, but if it was DARPA's new toy going bang - nice lightshow guys. Do it again!

UK council forced to swallow dick

HRH Martin
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Behave children

I'm dissapointed how much play this non story has got - it's no where as near as funny as the name of a local barman - Lou Pua ...

NZ scientists identify giant, man-eating eagle

HRH Martin

Slow News day at the Vulture HQ?

Must be a slow news day @ the Independent and Vulture HQ?

Existence of the Haast Eagle and its dietry habits has been known for decades if not a century.

Better toe the the party line on this one and say I'm sorry its extinct, but then undo all my good work by noting I'm glad not to share space with this apex predator... an apex predator with wings. Yoiks!