* Posts by Colonel Mad

162 publicly visible posts • joined 18 Aug 2009


CES Worst in Show slams gummi gouging, money-wasting mugs, and other dubious kit

Colonel Mad

Nothing from Dyson?

BOFH: It's Friday, it's time to RTFM

Colonel Mad

I use one of those to spark a fag.

Convicted felon busted for 3D printing gun parts

Colonel Mad

Gobber is due some porridge.

BOFH and the case of the disappearing teaspoons

Colonel Mad

So you have read Dabbsy's piece today!

The next time your program is 'not responding,' (do not) try these steps

Colonel Mad


The hot air balloon one is shorter.

Your software doesn't work when my PC is in 'O' mode

Colonel Mad

Why did I not see that coming?

Microsoft plans to drop SMB1 binaries from Windows 11

Colonel Mad


Server Message Block

In the graveyard of good ideas, how does yours measure up to these?

Colonel Mad


Why does it have traces of Spider in it?

IT blamed after HR forgets to install sockets in new office

Colonel Mad


Sometimes, these companies should be named.

Fibre broadband uptake in UK lags behind OECD countries

Colonel Mad

I live in an ordinary house in Milton Keynes, and City Fibre put the network in about 18 months ago, I have a large range of providers to choose from, but on 2 can be a***d, to send me junk mail. The box is 5 metres from the house, and I have no idea what happens if I order, will my front driveway be dug up, can they access the BT duct or the MKTV duct? So until one of them explains this on their website, I shall stay with FTTC.

Suspected Chinese spies break into cloud accounts of News Corp journalists

Colonel Mad


Reason 3,995 to hold off on that Windows 11 upgrade: Iffy performance on AMD silicon

Colonel Mad

Re: Good to see

Of which, the majority are from AMD...........

BOFH: You'll find there's a company asset tag right here, underneath the monstrously heavy arcade machine

Colonel Mad


If it has a PAT sticker, then its official.

Navigating without GPS is one thing – so let's jam it and see what happens to our warship

Colonel Mad

Cocked up

There is an Open University programme about the error of assuming your position is within the cocked hat, one of the people involved went on to lecture at BRNC

Start or Please Stop? Power users mourn features lost in Windows 11 'simplification'

Colonel Mad


And no seconds display in the task bar.

When everyone else is on vacation, it's time to whip out the tiny screwdrivers

Colonel Mad

Re: Two observations:

The lid of your box of iFixit tools has moulded compartments, what the cheapo version doesn't have is a T3 bit, so you can't really do anything with it, and they got really shirty when I pointed out this oversight to them.

Blackbaud – firm that paid off crooks after 2020 ransomware attack – fails to get California privacy law claim dropped

Colonel Mad


Blackbaud, (the under a) "cloud software provider that sells CRM systems for fundraising and communications to charities and educational institutions,".

Western Approaches Museum: WRENs, wargames, and victory in the Atlantic

Colonel Mad

Geeks Guides

I really love these, another place I had never heard of. Many thanks to Richard Currie.

Microsoft patches PrintNightmare – even on Windows 7 – but the terror isn't over

Colonel Mad


This patch has just turned up:

Um vor der Sicherheitslücke Print Nightmare zu schützen, hat Microsoft nun den Patch KB50004945 veröffentlicht. Es gibt die Aktualisierung nicht nur für Windows 10, sondern auch für Windows 8 und 7.


Microsoft releases Windows 11 Insider Preview, attempts to defend labyrinth of hardware requirements

Colonel Mad

Motherboards may have a TPM header, but most modern CPU's have a baked in TMP that just needs enabling in the BIOS.

A hotline to His Billness? Or a guard having a bit of a giggle?

Colonel Mad

Re: Hunt Groups

Whenever I've been in a Builders Merchant, the phone, the coffee, the cat, anything, takes priority over the poor sap standing at the counter.

Of all the analytics firms in the world, why is Palantir getting its claws into UK health data?

Colonel Mad

The final paragraph! Masterful.

Fastly 'fesses up to breaking the internet with an 'an undiscovered software bug' triggered by a customer

Colonel Mad

Re: And the bug was?

I do not think that any one country is better than another, openess depends on the organisations culture, and it's "definitely" BTW.

Oops, says Manchester City Council after thousands of number plates exposed in parking ticket spreadsheet

Colonel Mad

The Bus lane contraventions are via CCTV. So no superwarden - sorry.

If you can't log into Azure, Teams or Xbox Live right now: Microsoft cloud services in worldwide outage

Colonel Mad

Logged in to Xbox Live OK just now

You want me to do WHAT in that prepaid envelope?

Colonel Mad

Re: Club 50+

You will often find then in Doctors Surgeries here as well.

Colonel Mad

Re: Club 50+

It's a mere cost cutting measure.

Colonel Mad

Club 50+

Welcome & enjoy.

A word to the Wyse: Smoking cigars in the office is very bad for you... and your monitor

Colonel Mad

Ah, the Senior Service problem.

Reminds of when my Mum called the TV engineer out............

Healthy 32-year-old offered COVID-19 vaccine because doctors had him down as 6.2cm tall with BMI of 28,000

Colonel Mad

Re: consequences of mistakes in medical records

That's what phone cameras are for.

What's that you got there, AMD? More Ryzen chips? Yeah, OK, we could do with some of those

Colonel Mad

Got one (5600X)

Picked it up from Currys the other day

The myth of fingerprints: The Xiaomi 10T Pro is well-rounded, but it's definitively a sub-flagship handset

Colonel Mad

Re: Picture #2

Yes then, Army of God!

Colonel Mad

Re: Picture #2


Colonel Mad

Picture #2

Was that an old army post?

Currys PC World website crumples into unscheduled maintenance as shoppers chase latest gaming machines

Colonel Mad

Re: Maintenance! Calling it maintenance makes them look inept.


Amazon's ad-hoc Ring, Echo mesh network can mooch off your neighbors' Wi-Fi if needed – and it's opt-out

Colonel Mad


Stealing bandwith is a capital offence.

Apple's global security boss accused of bribing cops with 200 free iPads in exchange for concealed gun permits

Colonel Mad


Seems like a "Devs" character?

Police warn of bad Apples that fell off the back of a truck after highway robbery

Colonel Mad

48 Pallets on a single truck, more Apple exageration!

Dell online store charges 16 million dollars for new laptop with paint job

Colonel Mad

Soft Mint Wednesday

Out to launch: Huawei rolls out speedy charging Mate 40 and Mate 40 Pro flagships

Colonel Mad

App Porting

Can't you transfer you existing playstore apps over to a new huawei? and if so does it work?

UK state of the Internet report: Virgin Media 'fast', BT's PlusNet last

Colonel Mad


Of more interest is their 5G map, compare us in the UK with the republic of Ireland!

Let’s check in with that 30,000-job $10bn Trump-Foxconn Wisconsin plant. Wow, way worse than we'd imagined

Colonel Mad


Hi, Wiconsin in file name. great piece though.

Software billionaire accused of hiding $2bn in income from IRS – potentially the largest tax scam in US history

Colonel Mad

Old stuff

Thats why I still have some red & black T&E cable in the shed.

Hey Reg readers, Happy Spreadsheet day! Because there ain't no party like an Excel party

Colonel Mad

Re: Something I was told in the 80s

Wish I still had Supercalc, loved it.

Clarke's Third Law: Any sufficiently advanced techie is indistinguishable from magic

Colonel Mad

Re: Why is it always cold in the morning?

I managed an office block where the tennants complained about the heating, mainly too hot, it had conventional skirting rads on a 3 sided building, there were wind, temperature & sunlight sensors, all mounted in a row facing north.

In case you need more proof the world's gone mad: Behold, Apple's $699 Mac Pro wheels

Colonel Mad

UK Wheels

Sorry peeps, the're £699.00 over here too.In Apple World, exchange rates don't exist, try Japan?

Struggling company pleads with landlords to slash rents as COVID-19 batters UK high street. The firm's name? Apple

Colonel Mad

John Lewis

They also pay for space at my local John Lewis, as well as having the showroom, I used to get my mobiles from them, but its a pain to buy anything other than an apple product because the rest are squirrelled away in some store room.

'We stopped ransomware' boasts Blackbaud CEO. And by 'stopped' he means 'got insurance to pay off crooks'

Colonel Mad

National Trust

We have a statement on the volunteer website, and if I understand corporate speak, the NT are far from happy.

Everything must go! Distributors clear shelves of ALL notebooks in Q2, even ones gathering dust over last 12 months

Colonel Mad

Oh dear

1.2 million disappointed customers!

Trump gloats, telcos weep, and China is furious: How things stand following UK's decision to rip out Huawei

Colonel Mad


What about their stuff, one could re-lable it I suppose, HPE anyone?