Posts by Craig 28

Software SNAFU took out 10,000 military geo locators

Re:Collission

They make GPS units for the blind and they go to great pains to point out in the manual (HTML for computer speech access) that it is only to aid with "orientation" and isn't a "primary mobility aid." For everyone else your eyes are your primary mobility aid, as such the prat in question was obviously looking at the GPS when he should have been looking where he was going.

Don't blame the GPS, blame the pillock who wasn't able to concentrate on where they were going while checking the GPS from time to time. "I was following the GPS" is no excuse for a collision.

V-22 Osprey downblast scatters spectators like skittles

Oh heck

What about this is remotely scientific? I hate to be the one to nitpick but surely this belongs in odds and sods? Just because it involves a troubled military aircraft doesn't make it science. Now if there had been a technical fault then you might have had a case but frankly this is just the reg misfiling stories again, bloody annoying. When I look under science I'm doing it because I want science, when I look under odds and sods its because I want random crap that might make me laugh. I do both but at different times, is it so much to ask that Mr Page actually put the damn things where they belong?

Rave reviews at robotic robot-roaster raygun rollout

Not quite

Missiles will only be obsolete when the *other* side gets this kind of system working. Given that in the past 20-30 years no country we know of has developed stealth capability anything like the F117 it is plausible that ASMs will have life to come yet.

Plus the carriers can still fly strike craft carrying bombs for supporting ground operations, not to mention air cover.

Computing smart-scope gunsight for US snipers

One step towards...

The "Smartlink" system in the Shadowrun table-top RPG. All we need is the ability to fit this onto everything from a pistol to a rocket launcher...

All this aside while it might not be a wonder weapon, and even wonder weapons generally turn out pretty crappy in the end anyway compared to expectations laid on them, if used sensibly it could be a damn good tool.

Windows 3.0 turns 20

Well frankly

Win 98 is really what windows 95 could have done to have been, and windows ME is what should have been in place of 98.

I've used MS-DOS and Windows primarily my entire PC using life, I hate to say it but from here it can only go downhill. Windows, simeltaneously the best (standardisation) and worst thing to happen to computers.

Carmakers boost e-car noise standards for vision-impaired

Get a grip

With a quiet petrol car my mother used to nearly run over people not watching where they were going, this was in the days before mobiles or ipods. Some people just don't pay attention.

I'm blind and yes hybrids do concern me. Pedestrian crossing points don't do bollocks unless they're linked to traffic lights, they only just put the very first one in our town and not only is it in the silliest damn place but it also doesn't have any audio or tactile indications for when the lights are green for the pedestrians. The nearby zebra crossing gets ignored by at least 90% of motorists, is the busiest road in the town, and has been known to have accidents. They put the pelican crossing closer to the school, but this is only 3 minutes away from the zebra crossing I mentioned and has I'm reliably told by my younger sister been generally ignored by all the kids. Putting it in the centre of the town where the zebra crossing is would have benefitted the whole town as well as school kids, but that would have made too much damn sense.

Intel lays ground for larger netbooks

True

Atoms are established enough that people will recognise a turkey of a machine for what it is, bad design rather than a bad chip. There are plenty of people out there who want low cost computers but won't buy a £200 netbook because the keyboard and/or screen are just too small. The kind of people who only need web browsing and email, but not at the same time, and whose idea of a computer game is minesweeper or solitaire/patience.

Before anyone shouts out "Why not get a desktop" a lot of these people want to be able to put the computer away when not using it, something very easily done with a laptop sized system. While it isn't exactly what laptops were invented for it is no less a valid reason, and people would buy them for this no matter what us tech geeks might think of that mentality.

Bill Gates backs ball-busting ultrasound

Lay off already

The guy admitted English wasn't his first language, and they don't exactly teach you the word sperm in GCSE language classes now do they? It's perfectly plausible that the guy honestly didn't fully understand the translation of sperm and semen. They're two closely linked concepts in a rather risque area of language.

Wireless wee detectors hit Aussie grundies

Does that make them...

Digital dribble detecting drawers? Cordless crap checking knickers?

US airmen hornswoggled by Transformers email trick

Re:Surprised?

Oh I'm sure a lot of them have brains, they're just heavily trained not to use them. Imagine being given 50 push ups or whatever the military does every time you show any sign of individuality. Not to mention the risk of having to clean the latrines...

Megan Fox not world's sexiest woman: Official

Re:gone blind

I'm (genuinely) blind, using computer through synthetic speech output, and I wouldn't touch Cole with a barge pole. I heard her voice along with the rest of Girls Aloud on one of Chris Moyles' shows and none of their speaking voices appeal to me in the least. I'm not gay but from voices I'd sooner snog Allid or Scott Mills than any of that bunch.

US Army portaloo-full-of-missiles project for the chop

Hang on

How about retrofitting something like a C130 or somesuch with these? Naturally in such a way that they can be launched during flight. 30 mile range from a flying platform would be pretty ideal for low intensity warfare, especially on the occasions that the Taliban or whoever manage to create a defended position in some middle of nowhere area.

Also if you need more than 15 missiles then obviously you need something bigger.

Britain's bingers out-boozed by Irish

No shock

And that's exactly why this sort of thing doesn't get reported very much. news sources don't rely on good reporting in most cases, they rely on shock. Very sad state of affairs.

Bond 23 suspended 'indefinitely'

Re:Kiddy franchise

You mean like the James Bond Jr cartoon they tried doing years ago? Do the words "crash and burn" mean anything to you?

I generally didn't mind Brosnan, World is Not Enough worked okay for me, but Die Another Day was just a steaming pile. One too many for Brosnan combined with a giant frickin' laser satellite? Daniel Craig is just meh to me. Never got on with the older ones especially the Connery ones, see aforementioned giant frickin' laser syndrome.

Omegle invites you to show world+Facebook your bewbs

re:filtering

Not to mention that many modern routers are capable of blocking specific IP addresses by schedule. Get less technically aware parents to know about this and it'd help too I believe, especially if places like Sky's broadband service allowed this function. Yes it requires you to give the specific computers a static IP but if they tried that could be very easy for even non-technical people. Hell Sky or other companies that insist you use their own router could always include a function to choose which computers to block when individually and what kind of parental controls to apply to each, maybe based on MAC address combined with the computer's network name.

Thus the kids could use their computer for word processing but not for surfing youtube or whatever other crap they want to do.

Obama: We're off to Mars

Asteroids

I wonder if it might be possible to snag asteroids going by for resources, rather than having to lift them from Earth. Don't know how the maths stacks up though.

As to eggs in one basket that's exactly the point, we don't just need to have people up there we need to establish infrastructure. That can't happen until we have explored and developed the technology of spaceflight, so the sooner they stop sodding around in LEO the better for humanity as a whole. It'll take a long time and there will always be something "more urgent" down here so stop putting it off.

Bromsgrove lass slapped with Boozbo

Re:Drivers license

There is one good thing about ID cards, I'm damned sick of the drivers license being used for every little thing. I'm unable to drive due to disability and without either a driving license or a passport (don't tend to travel) it's bloody hard to prove who I am often enough. Most of the time the places need one form of ID from each of two or more lists, and without either of those I'm always one list short.

One fifth of humans say aliens walk among us

Idiots come in different flavours

It's just that only 20% of the population is made up of idiots who believe aliens walk among us. There are plenty more idiots, and not all idiots have to believe the same things. Hell my mother's boyfriend believes that anyone who doesn't vote in the general election has their vote counted towards the current government, that's some heavy duty idiot right there. No he obviously hasn't considered the statistics that would be involved in that before anyone asks, he also thinks you can make your own distilled water by boiling it in the kettle and that the "try it and see" approach to wiring a light fitting is valid, even when the fusebox keeps banging every time you try a different combination...

BOFH: The PFY Chronicles Part The Third

Felt a bit weak

Felt a weak episode, though I was suspicious before about whether the BOFH plotted the thing with the sheds in its entirety beforehand (rather elaborate) but this just can't be planned in advance surely? Someone has to be screwing over the PFY and there is only one person ideal for the job. I'm curious about the plot but it isn't making me laugh as hard as I'm used to.

And yes the bundles of cash were damned obvious. You'd think the PFY was an ameteur.

Facebook gives you the clap: Official

Re:The only safe sex

Right up until you get RSI. Some countries also give the death penalty for that, thank goodness Britain isn't (currently) one of them. Of course the right wingnuts in the US will probably get there first so that's going to give some advanced warning. That said it'd probably put Kleenex out of business so that's unlikely to happen.

Polaroid enthusiasts unveil new instant film

To be honest

I could see a market, though not necessarily universal, for a modern instant camera. Trouble is this isn't one, it's only the film as well. Their market will only go down as the numbers of polaroids out there that are in usable condition go down.

Now portable printers might be a credible alternative to an instant camera in a lot of cases, but that's just having the same functionality in a different package.

Boffins builds lithium battery that can't explode

Re:Narrow-minded criticism

Couldn't agree more. If it can be made to work in the future then the research is valuable. If it can't be made to work then they've at least tried it and ruled it out which is almost as valuable since it helps the original goal of finding a better battery technology. No glory in failed projects but they are just as important as successful ones overall.

Plus the cathode tech might be transferable to other concepts.

US kiddies treated to Playboy TV

Frankly

It does have to be better for them than Spongebob.

The black screens makes me wonder if there was a very serious fault, or if it was sabotage. Sounds like something the PFY would do for sh*ts and giggles.

ICANN delays decision on pornography domain

Why object?

Are they afraid that having a top level domain will legitimise porn? Frankly my view is that having a .xxx domain makes parental control easier, not all sites will use .xxx but then not all porn on TV is on the playboy channel. It allows you to safely cordon off a subset of the internet if you so wish, without fear of blocking anything harmless.

Or to put it another way:

Banning under-18s from sex shops won't stop them giggling over the sunday sport in their local newsagent, but at least they won't be able to off with the latest issue of "knockers knackers and smackers" or whatever the hell they sell. It will make things that much more difficult, and you can't prevent a determined teen boy from finding porn (trust me), you can only make it not as worth the effort in the hope they'll get bored and go drool over the latest Tomb Raider game instead.

'Health and safety killjoys' kill cheese-rolling race

Frankly

If you saw lots of people get hurt and dragged off in ambulances I fail to see how in good conscience you can encourage it in its current form. There will always be people who wish to take part in dangerous activities, but most dangerous activities require effort to take part in. Something so easily available and so potentially dangerous is quite a concern to be honest.

As to taking things, "You can take our freedom but you can't take our trousers!"

Kentucky woman breastfeeds sheriff's deputy

Re:Lactating

Unless she has hormonal issues, which can make women lactate without pregnancy. I wonder if it might also lead to erratic behaviour as well, this certainly qualifies.

Regarding mug shots, shouldn't this technically be a "jug shot"?

Sumo wrestler lifts cash machine

Bloody ametures

Car with tinted windows and no number plates? Could they be any more obvious? Bet the damn thing was black as well.

They've seen too many films no doubt. Or read too much Tom Clancy, if that's allowed in Moscow.

Black helicopters because you can bet they won't be black any more in real life...

Man of God backs Beverley porncoder

Re:Gutter press

Calling this gutter press is being bloody generous.

Hull Daily Mail exposes depraved local porncoder

Oh good grief, again

I wouldn't really care if the same company designed sites for the playboy channel and mothercare, so long as they're able to keep the two separate. What has this to do with anything?

On a more common note, how is this different to newsagents selling both "top shelf" magazines and kids comics? In fact the newsagent thing is worse since they're all physically in the same location, whereas the design efforts for web sites don't have any such connection between separate sites they develop. You could go further and consider such publications as the Sport to be pseudo-top shelf stuff.

Sellafield gull cull mulled

Re:placement

And it didn't occur to either of you that they were possibly just having a bit of fun with the work experience guy? Place like that it wouldn't surprise me if they had that kind of sense of humour.

Hey, Mr Games Addict! Do you have a problem?

If you can imagine a passtime

There will be someone, somewhere who takes it too far. This isn't unique to computerised games.

Of course I'd like to class playing WoW as a mental illness in itself, but that's a whole other matter. Once upon a time Blizzard used to be quite good, sighs. And yes I do think of WoW as the reality TV of gaming.

Microscope-wielding boffins crack cordless phone crypto

Re:Just tell the DECT people

And trust that they'll do something about it? As opposed to exposing it and making sure they'll do something about it? Often standards need a shove to get moved on, this is one such shove.

US sorority girls in booze-fuelled orgy of violence

Old saying

Regarding war, "don't let them give you to the women".

Or in other words, women can be just as bloody vicious as men.

They've been blaming computer games for years, its about time they stopped. If it isn't computer games it is TV and films, if it isn't TV it was D&D. What about rolling dice is going to make someone more likely to commit violence? If we get down to the nitty gritty isn't chess a violent game? Or how about Cluedo? Pop up pirate? Mouse trap? Water pistols?

We're getting progressively less violent as a society despite what people would have you think, so we are actually being *sensitised* to violence. It isn't the perpetrators being *desensitised*. Hell apparently there was a major problem with knife carrying in the 50's here in Britain, and a lot of teddy boys were people roaming round in gangs for the simple purpose of looking for a scrap. No purpose to it, no territory or personal gain, just wanting a scrap because they enjoyed getting in fights. Knives, chains, you name it. They made hoodies look like samaritans.

Holy Father turns on to Dad Rock

Re:Homosexuality

They don't just ask their priests to stop "shoving their willies up mens bums", they say homosexuality is a sin. They probably in many cases go so far as thinking of it as a disease. While this isn't quite eradicating it in the sense of killing them all they would very much like to "wipe out" the practice by "curing" homosexuals.

As much as I'm not a fan of religion the vattican certainly isn't known for being progressive. While the anglican church has debated over openly gay bishops the catholics have yet to allow women as priests. I'm not a fan of discrimination based on religion, but how do you deal with this when the religion itself is fundamentally discriminatory in itself? My solution is to criticise the institution and its leadership without criticising individual believers unless they act in a bigotous manner. This is more or less how I handle governments too, I consider the government of a country as separate to the individual citizens thus I don't blame Americans for invading Iraq I only blame the relevant (mis)administration.

iPhone keeps buried earthquake victim alive for three days

Well to be honest

The information about shock probably isn't common knowledge. On the other hand if you were going to a potentially iffy area you probably would want to take a first aid course first.

China jails porn-monger

No thanks

They'll probably turn around and charge you for accessing unlawful and indecent material. At least they can keep it in your file in case you ever say a word out of place about their politics.

Oz banker caught porn-surfing on live TV

re:viral

Not to mention the model in question getting a lot of free publicity herself. Actually she might be better positioned (ahem) to make use of it than the bank.

Stranded Hartlepool pair refuse coastguard rescue

@Frostbite

Yes, because we all know that symptoms can't be representative of more than one condition or occur naturally on their own. As soon as anyone sneezes that definitively proves they have pneumonia.

Hypothermia is no laughing matter I'm sure. I don't object to this story, but the old "That sounds like the guys at work" remark is frankly worn out.

French mock British G-spot probe

Perhaps they should

Also investigate whether identical and non-identical twins in regard to their culinary tastes, sexual preference and sexual tastes in terms of acts.

Some people, male and female alike, enjoy anal sex and others don't. Why isn't it possible that some women enjoy G-spot stimulation to various degrees while others do not? In the anal example it is pure personal preference, the structures involved are very much alike. Similarly it is possible there is a structure to represent the G-spot but that some women do not gain pleasure from its stimulation. My arm is very much alike to yours but yours may not be ticklish while mine is.

Biology is rarely so cut and dried.

Woman sues rail line for 'exploding' toilet

Surely

Baleful Bog Bowl Blowout?

Think this happened to John Prescott once when he was back in opposition in the early 90s. I recall Have I Got News For You saying "if you find a politician covered in his own effluent amusing... then shame on you."

Brit kids failing to fall out of trees

Also consider...

Along with the aforementioned valid points about skill, weather and so on consider how many kids have access to trees? And cultural willingness to do stupid things (like climbing trees) while not on friendly turf (like your own garden). If the kids don't consider it "their" tree they might not be so inclined to climb it.

California school pulls 'oral sex' dictionary

Good grief

On the initial point pulling a dictionary because of explicit words is rather ridiculous, maybe they need to make a "bible belt" edition for all the prudes over there.

On the other hand I'm not sure "oral sex" should be in simply because it is a two word term the meaning of which is obvious from the words it is made up of. It is sex involving the mouth. Why does this need an entry? Equally I wouldn't expect there to be entries for anal sex, and for the same reason wouldn't expect entries for "fleece jacket" or "ear infection".

BOFH-making bug plugged in D-link update

Re:Captias

Seconded. It makes things completely hellish for those of us with impaired vision, and don't even claim those audio captias are anything other than the biggest pile of bollocks ever to be invented. If you had to use the audio captias you'd despise them even more than the visual ones, lots of echoing and ghosted voices confusing things with an already unclear synthetic voice. This is from someone who uses synthetic voices every time I turn a computer on, those voices are truly awful. I'll never buy any D-Link kit now after hearing this because I know it will be a pain in the arse to use, if I even can use it at all. Luckily Netgear stuff is quite easy to use for me, no unlabelled graphics either.

Peppa Pig told to belt up

re:seat belts in toy cars

Until some kid manages to pull one of the belts loose and chokes on it, thus causing a sudden about turn with many of the same people demanding that the ruling should be removed immediately.

Not just common sense for parents, it should be a requirement for anyone making any kind of formal complaint to pass such a test. Along with all politicians, journalists, news readers... Hang on, I think we've just ruled out the entire media.

Fem-rage shocker: Woman zaps ex-boyf with pink taser

Alternatively...

What happens when an assaulter uses a taser in contact stun mode to surprise someone? Or some clever sod disables the confetti spray?

There is no such thing as "non lethal" there is only "Not designed to be fatal". Hell you could probably kill someone with a paintball gun if you did it right (or wrong depending on whether it was intentional). Frankly Taser Int should be sued for false advertising.

Dragon Age: Origins game in gay sex scene shock

Actually not too common

It is sad that this is considered an "event". It is however pretty uncommon, and don't start using girl on girl same sex relationships or action to disagree. Girl on girl is titilating to many men, and is probably more generally accepted as an on screen thing. Hell star trek (DS9 anyway) had girl on girl kissing, but no guy on guy.

eBooks: What to read on which reader

Re:Dead technology walking

You sort of missed the point here. What device you use is only relevant if the ebook format is tied to that device only as Amazon are doing, with all other devices it is the format that will matter more. Even if stand alone ebook readers won't last (dead before they got going even) then other devices that provide ebook functionality will still be using the same file formats.

Its all about the format, screw the devices.

Blogger outs back-end Google tech

Either...

It's an attempt to get more ads to end users, ahem

An attempt to collect biomass for a new development in power generation, so they can control the world

Or its just a really, really crap joke.

Vampires not good role models for Catholics, declares Vatican

@Hollerith

No, the vattican only approves if it is the selfless love of the church. They only want people to love their wife or husband because by doing so they're showing their love for the church, because the bible tells them to love their wife or husband.

I'm very tolerant in religious terms, but I've little patience for the crap that spews from the vattican. The vattican isn't tolerant to even half their membership (women), having told them to return to their traditional roles. How can you be tolerant towards such a group? I am tolerant towards individuals so long as they don't spout the same rubbish they're told to spout without thinking first.

Arkansas cop tasers 10-year-old girl

Regarding hoodies

Was an interesting documentary on a few weeks ago about how violent society has been. Apparently teddy boys that grouped up in gangs were way worse than hoodies ever have been, going so far as to carry chains and get into big fights just because they find a punch up enjoyable. Apparently in the 50s knives were as bad a problem as they are now at least. Violence comes in bursts it seems, it always comes around eventually, but we're more and more shocked by lesser and lesser acts of violence because we are a less violent society. Get a grip and look at the facts.

While it may or may not be justified to stun the kid it was definitely not justified for the mother to suggest the use of the taser. She is not qualified to make that decision. After the mother suggested the taser I could well imagine the kid panicking and reacting instinctively in preemptive self defence. I sure as hell wouldn't have stood for someone suggesting that, though I'd probably have given her a gob full instead. That said the kid is known to have emotional control issues it seems, and the mother is obviously not capable of reacting with any diplomacy. If the mother isn't incompetent or abusive then it would probably be advisable for her to receive advice on dealing with such a child from professionals. Shouting "Tase her if you need to!" isn't going to calm her down, that's for bloody certain.