* Posts by pctechxp

1020 publicly visible posts • joined 11 May 2007


What do you call megabucks Microsoft? No really, it's not a joke. El Reg needs you


Considering they've called the cloud service Azure........

.........which is related to a gem so they consider it precious and they seem open to running anything on it these days

Surely there has to be a Lord of the Rings reference.

Lord of the clouds?

One cloud to rule them all, one Bing to try and find them, one cloud to host them all and in the time consuming hassle of cloud data transfer bind them

CIMON says: Say hello to your new AI pal-bot, space station 'nauts


Portal 2 taken literally

Anyone else think this might have been slightly influenced by the AI character Wheatley from Portal 2.

Let's just hope this one doesn't turn bad and has an off switch?

Lester Haines: RIP




His articles would brighten up a dull day and sometimes made me laugh so hard I'd be gasping for air.

Sincere condolences to his family and colleagues.

RIP Lester.

Then there were 3: Another UK mobile network borged ...


Why did Telefonica buy it then?

If they weren't really that interested then it might have been better to leave mmO2 as an LSE listed company.

I need a password to BRAKE? What? No! STOP! Aaaargh!


Excellent points made in an amusing way.

This will scare you senseles then - an Audi RS7 driving at racing speeds


O2 breathes life into Amazon Fire: Mobe to hit Blighty in WEEKS


Jeff's dream

In a future software release the phone will listen to what you talk about and order it automatically using your linked credit card.

TV transport tech, part 1: From server to sofa at the touch of a button


Very interesting

More articles like this.

Any chance of finding out the inner workings of Openreach?

Assange™: Hey world, I'M STILL HERE, ignore that Snowden guy


And the point of all this is?

So he's been holed up there for two years.

What really did he think was going to change?

The guy wants to be hailed a hero so why not come out and face this music?

BlackBerry sues American Idol host's company for 'blatant' patent infringement


This sounds familiar

Isn't another multibillion dollar US computer turned consumer electronics firm trying to sue a Korean multibillion Won consumer electronics firm over practically everything?

The moral is: the lawyers laugh all the way to the bank and your company is left a steaming pile of s**t.

Samsung: Men, our Gear smartwatch will make you a hit with the sexy ladies


LG got there first

A wrist mounted phone with a bluetooth headset is a good idea in theory but it just doesn't work in practice.

So why do they think a watch linked to a phone is a better idea?

One of last few iPhone 5Ss STOLEN from within MASSIVE POLICE CORDON at Apple Store


Robust security not really in Apple's interest

They know that a good proportion of their customers will not switch to anything else so:

1. The customer's new iPhone gets nicked, they (or possibly their insurance) buys a new one so that's possibly over a grand in revenue from one customer.

2. In the UK at least networks are supposed to block IMEI numbers of stolen handsets to prevent them authenticating against UK networks and so being used but this may not apply to all parts of the globe so if the phone gets sent overseas it can be used and this also means Apple can still sell apps for the device.

It's a win-win for them.

Michael Dell: 'Cash in your shares, we are in a mess'


Apple fans have short memories

Remember that your beloved technology was bailed out by MS not long after St Steve took the helm for the second time.

FLABBER-JASTED: It's 'jif', NOT '.gif', says man who should know


I hear

they are planning to change it to cif

I'll get my coat

The Reg puts Vulture inside the Large Hadron Collider


Re: machines that go ping

That'll be the microwave in the staff canteen.

Wealthy London NIMBYs grit teeth, welcome 'ugly' fibre cabinets


Simple answer

Paint the cabinets black and fit them with a stereo system playing a repeat recording of a Bentley/Mercedes or Rolls Royce gently idling over the fan noise.

Holly(oaks) talking head is FUTURE of face messaging, claims prof


Max Headroom

Now now now that would be ca ca ca cool

Swedish boffins: An Ice Age is coming, only CO2 can save us


Good news for IT then

As there won't need to be vast spaces taken up by cooling equipment.

20 years of GSM digital mobile phones



My first mobile was a circa 1998 Ericsson S868.

That thing held onto a signal like a dog to a bone, it had buttons, a two line monochrome dot matrix screen and great sound quality.

Today's touch screens are all about gimmicks and not functionality, bring back functional phones please, I can't stand touch screens and phones that can't hold a signal.

Kyocera boffins make on-screen buttons feel real


Why not

Just add a keyboard.

Hardware failure melts down Chocolate Factory


And there was I thinking

Google now had a tentacle into every ISP in the world.

Kim Dotcom offers free internet with own submarine cable


History repeats itself

The cable might be free once its laid but its unlikely that providers in the the US will give him free rack space, power and peering and transit.

Arab investors may fund it for a time (as for the moment they have little else to spend their caverns of cash on) but they certainly aren't stupid and are unlikely to fund it forever if it doesn't make a return.

Here in the UK plenty have tried to make free Internet (or free after an initial fee) work as a business model, all were shortlived after telcos withdraw support after usage outstripped estimates by an order of magnitude.

Anyone remember RedHotAnt or LibertySurf?

Windows 8: Microsoft will declare victory, but will anyone believe it?


Turning its back on system builders?

MS has seen the success Apple has had when it controls both the hardware and software and has had quite a bit of success itself (after the Red Ring of Death issue) with the Xbox 360 console and Xbox Live service.

It thinks at least it can repeat this success in the tablet space and take 100% revenue, cutting out the system builders and maybe offering a subscription model to finance the device and ongoing service charges, this is probably why they are offering direct discounts and not doing this through the channel, they'd much rather people buy a Surface.

Many readers will say 'I'll just switch to Linux' but the problem is Linux DOES NOT drive hardware innovation, like it or not standards are still dominated by the demands placed by Microsoft software on hardware.

I don't want to see the demise of the desktop but If MS succeeds in what it is trying to do I see a lot of small system builders going out of business and the big companies relegated to selling printers and hosted services,

Sad but true.

Salesforce CEO Benioff: Win 8 is 'the end of Windows'


The only tablet I'll consider

Will be the Surface Pro.


1. It'll have a proper CPU so will run a full fat version of Windows meaning I can run the applications I need/want to when I'm away from my desktop.

2. I'll no doubt be able to link the peripherals I need from time to time to it such as an external DVD or hard drive.

3. It's lighter than a laptop/Ultrabook so transportation is easier.

4. It'll have a mouse and keyboard so I can actually do meaningful work on it unlike the iPad posers that can only post short messages to facebook and twitter because its too annoying but hey they feel good because they shelled out 500+ quid on it so it must be good.

Initially at least LTE will be for the moneybags like the Salesforce CEO and as others have said, smart business owners won't want the vendor lock in.

We already have the tools we need, that is VPN for offsite access to customer records stored on server cluster or if you really must use the marketing term 'the private cloud'

Virgin Media's blighted SuperHub NOW comes with extra squeal (oink)


Other Netgear kit too

I have a DGN2200 v1 ADSL modem/router which I purchased from PC World and it does exactly this.

I went back to PC World and they swapped the router and exactly the same thing happened, went back a third time and was told this was normal for Netgears.

Router itself is rock solid though

Sarah Brightman plans International Space Station gig



It was found they were B-b-bad to the bone

Mine's the leather one with the fake beard hanging out of the pocket

Texas Instruments: Screw smartphones, put our chips in the dishwasher


Let's hope

They don't make them speak with that annoying synthesised American accent their old speak and spell/maths/write education toys used to use.

Hardware fault?


I could make a gag about PC versus Mac but i won't

What version of the Mac OS is the machine running? (Snow Leopard, Lion, Mountain Lion)?

Who queues for an iPhone 5? Protesters, hipsters and the jobless


Virtual queuing is best

For stuff I really must have on launch day (Alan Wake was the last game I craved this much) I just preordered it.

All you need to know about nano SIMs - before they are EXTERMINATED

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Back to the future

The old TACS and ETACS phones (analogue 1G phones used in the UK) did not have a SIM, they were programmed with the associated number, if you lost it your number went too as far as I'm aware and number portability was writing it down in your diary and putting that in your pocket.

Now this would rely on the operator releasing control of the phone so you could switch, bit of a retrograde step methinks which is why Apple likes it.

Apple will tie you to an operator that pays them the most money.

Apple to launch streaming online radio service?


apple buys up all tier one connectivity providers

Prevents none Apple devices from connecting unless hefty royalties are paid, renames it the AppleCore

Not a reality now but I bet that's what they;d love to do.

Raspberry Pi production back in Blighty

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Great news

I'll wait for them to exhaust the chinese stock then I'll buy one.

Mine's the coat with the Union Jack on the back.

Nokia tears wraps off new Windows Phone Lumias on steroids


Oh joy another touchscreen

Just like every other phone.

Markets to remain glutted with rapidly-depreciating Facebook shares


The market is about to be flooded by

lots of cheap servers.

RIM reshuffles UK and European team ahead of new OS


Blackberry not dead yet

There are plenty of people that prefer a physical keyboard.

Only device I know of that provides a complete encrypted connection over the manufacturer's own IP backbone.

Encryption has not been cracked.

UK kids' charity lobbies hard for 'opt-in' web smut access


Nice lady, shame about the lack of technical savvy

While this lady has my respect for quite a few things she has done to help people like setting up Childline or presenting consumer advice TV pieces her comments show complete ignorance of the technical practicalities of what she is asking for, its a tad different than ordering 500 phone lines from BT.

As others have said, responsible adults should not leave their kids in front of the computer unattended, it is not a baby sitter and any technical measures will be circumvented by the unscrupulous and just lead to legitimate non adult material being blocked when the filter code malfunctions which causes aggravation for the rest of us.

Better still keep them off the net till they are 18.

Post-pub nosh deathmatch: Pierogi versus patatas revolconas


tough choice

For me though it has to be the spud based dish FTW

Everything Everywhere to be Nothing Nowhere in rebrand



'cos we're buggered if we know.

Optical Express 'ruined my life' gripe site lives on


Hmmmm thought about this myself

But has been said, if any man, woman or machine screws up your eyes there's no going back

I'll stick with glasses or contacts.

Assange calls for help from … Quakers?


How will he get to Ecuador?

As Hague has said he won't have safe passage out of the UK.

Here's hoping a helicopter arrives and rope ladder descends that he has to clamber up.

That should make interesting news rather than just showing the front of the embassy with cops outside.

Lone config file in Mac OS X SIGNALS DEATH OF THE DVD



It could just mean any USB device so that could include a USB optical drive.

Kidney-for-iPad fanboi sues after illness strikes


Proof that

greed will be your undoing, unless you are a banker of course.

Reg readers scrap over ultimate bacon sandwich


The ultimate bacon sarnie

Get some lean, good quality unsmoked back bacon.

Fry it to your particular opinion of done in olive oil

A nice fresh baguette dipped in the essence, lay on the bacon and enjoy.

Get good quality bacon and you don't need no stinkin' sauce!

Curiosity needs OS upgrade before getting down to science


What if

It gets stuck in a reboot loop

IT pro to storm Everest in Bletchley Park cash quest

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Fair play to her I say

She's obviously got more guts than a lot of people that have posted and certainly more guts than I would have but then again I'm no fan of heights.

All the best to you, donation coming shortly.

Natwest freezes debit cards, online banking in fresh cock-up

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Good luck with getting your employer to pay you in cash.

outages will happen sometime but these do seem to be occurring a little too often to be routine failures.

Cockfighting Reg hack cursed with cancer

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senseofhumour.exe has encountered a problem and needs to close

Obviously the flamer's sense of humour process failed.

While I'm definitely not in favour of animal cruelty I can determine humour from genuine intent which the flamer obviously couldn't.

Love the poster.

Really funny stuff as always Lester, keep up the good work.

Apple finally grabs apple.co.uk – after just 16 years


Re: @AC The Beatles thing

Sorry the domain is www.applecorps.com which redirects to http://www.thebeatles.com/

Microsoft pops preview of 'biggest, most ambitious' Office yet


Re: Iceberg dead ahead...

Couldn't agree more.

Small businesses might take this up but I doubt corporates will.