Posts by Lockwood

Hundreds of Mr A N OTHERs discovered on payrolls

Because dirty data is always annoying to deal with.

Also, this:

http://thedailywtf.com/Articles/The-Service-Awards-Ceremony.aspx

I sometimes have to run through databases to import their data into our new system.

We get several people who haven't been born yet.

"Mr Dead", who lives at "Removed from system" and is banned from entyr to venues for the next 2 years for "RIP"

Yeah. Endless fun.

City slickers get another 5 years of free Wi-Fi

MAN that pun was awful. Get a GREP on reality or else I will mercilessly beat you with a CAT.

Valve chief says Apple will own your living room

"Apple has filed patents for several technologies that could fit the bill"

How much of those though are just to prevent Sony/Microsoft/Nintendo from doing stuff?

Sony Ericsson Xperia Mini Pro Qwerty Android smartphone

I've got 2.3.5 on my X10 mini pro.

W00t.

So, the new phone runs an older version than this older phone which is running a newer version.

Yay.

UK patent office spawns free search site

The front end's called Ipsum.

The backend driving it: Lorem.

I suppose it'll make budding trolls have an easier job now.

Smut oglers told to opt in to keep web filth flowing

Wha?

We again reach the question of demarkation.

At what point do naughty images become naughty images.

All this think of the children stuff is getting old now.

October 14 declared 'Steve Jobs Day'

You had to say it, didn't you...

I don't want to live on this planet anymore

Amazon revamps E Ink Kindle line

@AC 1031

Welcome to Norfolk?

Star Trek TNG revamped for Blu-ray in 2012

Star Trek DVD boxsets were prohibitively expensive, even second hand they can go for as much as £15, compared to the £5 <other tv show> boxset next to them.

Ok, they did have the funky plastic bump case.

The TOS movie BluRay was even worse costwise when it came out.

I think these TNG BluRays will, if history guides us, not have that many units sold...

Mozilla forces Firefox 7 on memory diet

Seh-ven?

Wasn't it not that long ago people were preparing to roll out FF6?

We love these companies that keep rolling out new versions this quick.

Apple loses bid to trademark 'multi-touch'

There's a glazier in Portsmouth that has called itself Apple, or Apple Conservatories or something.

Either way, there's an Apple shop that sells windows.

Creepy.

.Scot campaign seeks UK Gov backing

You do have one!

.lancashire.gov.uk

ietf.rfc for all your standards discussions needs.

Apple staff in UK told to cancel holiday in early October

Not even iCe Cream?

Booze giant's Facebook tie-up sparks ad concerns

And when children walk into ASDA/Tesco/Mr Singh's Corner Shop, they get exposed to seeing that alcohol exists as well!

Capital gets trendy address: .London on its way

So, we can have transport companies with non .gov.uk addresses?

transport.london, tube.london, rather that www.tfl.gov.uk/tube etc? Awesome!

Outer London will have problems. wimbledontennis.london? IIRC, Wimbledon is technically Surrey, not London.

heathrow.london or heathrow.middx?

These gTLDs are going to be a typing nightmare.

Though, I'd like to see a .cmo and .coom gTLD

CPU cycles for stars: theSkyNet wants your sandbox

inb4anyoneelsedoesanxkcdlink

http://xkcd.com/534/

Am I thinking along the wroing lines here?

Parliament has no time for 100,000+ signature e-petitions

Classic.

Do they have time to deal with traditional petitions?

Also, people keep talking about this new thing called an e-petition. I seem to rememebr them being around years back. Did they stop and restart or something?

Sun rises over .xxx smut domain

Hmm

"Uniform Dispute Resolution Policy"

When talking about porn sit-

Never mind.

HP pops out all-in-one biz boxes

Touchscreen in the office

I developed touch screen customer facing applications a while back. I made use of the screen to develop on.

I got myself a TC1100 (Remember the tablet hybrid that they stopped making in 2005, a whole 5 years before Apple invented the tablet?) over a normal laptop in order to have the touch capability.

You can do a lot more natural testing of customer facing touchscreen applications when you are actively developing and testing on one!

Hurry up with webcams in courts, says Sky News boss

Hmm

On one side, it makes the public gallery bigger.

On the other side:

Coming up next on ITV-2: Judges: behind the wig, where we show what the courts don't want you to see

OR

Text GUILTY or NOT GUILTY to 61234, messages cost £1 or call 0906 123 0001 for Guilty, 0906 123 0002 for Not Guilty, calls cast 50p a minute from a BT line, mobiles and other operators may vary. Calls last 2 minutes.

Secret list of celebrity .xxx domains removed from market

Re: Re: He Who Shall Not Be...

I mean Moh-

I also meant 34'd, of course.

Yes

Please visit http://www.AnonymousCoward.xxx/ for commenttard pr0n.

Apple after Steve Jobs is still Steve Jobs' Apple

Steve's resignation letter, full text below:

iQuit

Ofcom mulls smackdown for rogue religious TV channel

Why so serious?

They'd probably be allowed to advertise it through the appropriate means:

Pharmaceutical publications/journals

Promotional materials to hospitals

Indirectly through news: "News just in, Glaxosmithkline have announced that they have finally discovered the cure for cancer..."

Television adverts? Probably not.

Before the huge "ZOMG" crowd start, how often are serious medications advertised on the TV?

You get adverts for various over the counter drugs, but I can't remember the last time I saw an advert for "Insulex! Instead of your normal Insulin, take Insulex! Insulex, for all your diabetic needs! Call 0906 342 2383 (0906 DIA BETE) for your free sample now!"

In the same way, I can't imagine the cancer cure drug being advertised in such a way.

Oxford adds woot! to dictionary

Two words?

Gypsy

Crypt

Crypts

Tryst

Trysts

By, My, Thy, Shy, Fry, Sty, Sly, Why, Dry, Fly, Try

I'm guessing the other one that's not a Y word is cwm?

Google+ bans real name under ‘Real Names’ policy

Yep

I have had to put myself down as New Hampshire for a few things, despite living in the original one.

Facebook wannabe rioters cop large helpings of porridge

Oops.

Anonymous Coward: "I'm a rioter"

Look! We've got another one!

They...

There was clear intention.

The man on the Clapham omnibus should see what these people were planning to do. The fact that noone else joined in doesn't matter much from that perspective.

Turning up at the arranged meeting place really didn't help the case much.

No title

I'd expect a proportional response - inciting rioting should get a harsher sentence than a "victimless" crime at a peaceful demonstration.

Wha?!

You want to compare rioting and looting to peaceful demonstartion?

You fail

The opinion seems to be this:

"I'm of the opinion that we need a riot here, I'm going out to start one, who's going to join me"

So Yeah.

Titles? Where we're going, we won't need... titles.

First rule of doing bad things: Get other people to do it for you.

"I'll be at McDonalds to start the bad time rolling."

"Meet at McDonalds and get stuff rolling, I'll join you later."

One of these leads to you getting your collar felt as soon as you arrive.

The other has you sat nice and warm in your control centre and you can do a nice safe pass by to see if it'll be safe to join in.

Disclaimer: Thinking about this from a purely tactical/strategic point of view rather than an "I'm a rioter" pov.

Re: Strong message

It does nicely send the message of "Don't do that again; you see the consequences?!" though

Facebook flashplodder to appeal against 4-yr cooler stint

Scale

I nick a TV, I have caused one tv to be stolen (and possibly one window broken)

I incite the riot, I cause several people to go and steal several tvs and several windows to be broken.

Mozilla strokes coders with Firefox 6

Yep.

"Years ago, we didn't have the resources. Today, I argue, we shouldn't care even if we do have the resources because of the cost benefit trade. A minute spent making a corporate user happy can better be spent making many regular users happy. I'd much rather Mozilla spending its limited resources looking out for the billions of users that don't have enterprise support systems already taking care of them."

http://www.theregister.co.uk/2011/06/24/microsoft_attacks_mozilla_on_enterprise/

FTFY

This new version numbering from Mozilla is a bad joke. Can Mozilla please fork OFF and restore some sanity?

I'm confused

Anti-anything-Microsoft guy: "ZOMG. Windows 8? Windows 7 only came out fairly recently and not much after Vista. Blawww. Too many versions too soon"

Anti-anything-Microsoft guy: "WOW! Firefox has a new version! IE updates are so infrequent! They keep updating and it's so cooooool!!!"

It's just so that they can have v50 in 5 1/2 years time. (one release every 6 weeks is around 8 a year, 44 versions to go...)

Cops arrest man over phone-hacking, police corruption claims

Outlook 2000?

It looks like you're tyring to resist arrest.

Can I help?

- Review PACE

- Load escape routes in AutoRoute/MapPoint

- Change into a lockpick for cuffs

Arrested by appointment

I still find it funny when you have the news stories about people having an appointment at the Police station, whereupon they get arrested.

Whilst it is nothing like as dramatic as "Metropolitan Police storm Coulson's house, Coulson arrested after Taser discharge", it certainly feels a lot more British!

The only thing missing to make it the ultimate British experience is if it were a mass arrest, and you had five suspects all in the waiting room in an orderly queue waiting for their turn to be arrested.

(see http://forums.theregister.co.uk/post/1114982)

14 arrested in crackdown targeting Anonymous

Movies?

You must have seen the opening shot of Hackers, then the later raid on the subway station?

Of course you need guns to counter keyboards.

Captain Kirk's Google+ account gets zapped

In a feat of tabloid journalism logic...

I can infer from the article that Google suspected Shatner of being an Anon.

Hundreds of dot-brand domains predicted

Always looks odd.

The Coop went through a pahse of putting their website on their carrier bags.

www.southern.coop

It never looked like it should work!

Coulson arrested

Do you have an appointment?

I always find it funny when you have the news stories about people having an appointment at the Police station, whereupon they get arrested.

Whilst it is nothing like as dramatic as "Metropolitan Police storm Coulson's house, Coulson arrested after Taser discharge", it certainly feels a lot more British!

The only thing missing to make it the ultimate British experience is if it were a mass arrest, and you had five suspects all in the waiting room in an orderly queue waiting for their turn to be arrested.

UK will obey Euro unisex-insurance rules from 2013

About time!

I know someone who's a professional driver, and his sister who had two own-fault writeoffs in a year gets to pay less insurance, simple due to possesion of breasts!

I've always argued that Diamond/Sheila's Wheels should not be allowed to exist: Insurance "for women only". If I made "Bob's Wheels" for men only, the feminist movement would go crazy!

It's about time that insurance across this board stopped looking at generic statistics and started to look at individual factors more.

Lego Star Wars to be celebrated in TV special

I don't understand this article

Can we please have a Playmobil reconstruction to demonstrate this?