* Posts by Lockwood

421 publicly visible posts • joined 21 Jul 2009


Raspberry Pi 5 revealed, and it should satisfy your need for speed



I'm guessing this will be just as available as the Pi4 or Zero2?

A great day for non-robots: iOS 16 will bypass CAPTCHAs


I use Arch btw

Cloudflare explains how it managed to break the internet


Re: More than just their users affected

I have a pihole with unbound - I used to use, then

Not the ideal solution for everyone, but it has some advantages

Germany advises citizens to uninstall Kaspersky antivirus


Re: Who do I trust?

Meet hot single penguins in your area!

Jeff Bezos wants to build a business park in space


Raises a question

What is the income tax rate for a business that is based in international waters?

Brit accused of spying on 772 people via webcam CCTV software tells court he'd end his life if extradited to US


Re: Team America: World Police


'An issue of survival': Why Mozilla welcomes EU attempts to regulate the internet giants


I'm GAFAM's reckoning

When GAFAM is ashes, you have my permission to die.

UK ads watchdog bans Burger King Twitter jibe for condoning chucking milkshakes at politicians


I throw NotImplementedExceptions and let other people catch them.

Oops, wait, yeah, we did hand over photos for King's Cross facial-recog CCTV, cops admit


Transcript of the meeting after Sadiq's statement

Sadiq Khan : Well, obviously. It was the one question today to which I could give a clear, simple, straightforward, honest answer

MPS : Unfortunately, although the answer was indeed clear, simple and straightforward, there is some difficulty in justifiably assigning to it the fourth of the epithets you applied to the statement inasmuch as the precise correlation between the information you communicated and the facts insofar as they can be determined and demonstrated is such as to cause epistemological problems of sufficient magnitude as to lay upon the logical and semantic resources of the English language a heavier burden than they can reasonably be expected to bear.

Sadiq Khan : Epistemological? What are you talking about?

MPS : You told a lie.

RIP 2019-2019: The first plant to grow on the Moon? Yeah, it's dead already, Chinese admit



Should have tried growing potatoes. We know that they'll grow off of Earth, if fertilised with astronaut poop.

Server retired after 18 years and ten months – beat that, readers!


Re: I find this one a bit difficult to believe

Back to back, black to black.

Ukrainian teen created in lab passes Turing Test – famous nutty prof


Re: Transcript

Oh, what a fruitful conversation;-)

Titsup Russian rocket EXPLODES, destroys $275m telly satellite


You are having a bad problem and you will not go to space today

Spy back doors? That would be suicide, says Huawei


Could it be? Is this Moderatrix 2.0?

(And sweet irony that a post wondering about the Moderatix' second coming gets put into the modqueue)


... Allegedly

It woz the Reg wot won it: UK mobe network EE fixes voicemail hack flaw

Thumb Up

Huzzah! A victory for common sense!

It's nice to see that El Reg has the pulling power to get a large company to fix stuff, rather than be dismissed as "some niche website"

It's good to see that we are now a step closer to having such impersonation attacks closed off.

(Actually posted by Simon, spoofing this random user's account)

Android engineer: We didn't copy Apple or follow Samsung's orders


Why can't Samsung just give the reply given in the case of Arkall v Pressdram?

Anatomy of OpenSSL's Heartbleed: Just four bytes trigger horror bug


I'm happy to see that the bulletproof OS is still bulletproof.

Back off, Siri! Microsoft debuts Halo beauty Cortana


Re: Queeg 500

What is it?

Homeopathic remedies contaminated with REAL medicine get recalled


All you people speaking out against this are just homeophobes!

MPs blast HMRC for using anti-terrorism laws against whistleblower


RIPA's the thing that lets councils fine you for trying to recycle a glass jar if they can't recycle glass, or for throwing a newspaper away as household waste, right?

Fanbois SQUEAL as DNS snafu knocks out iTunes website


There was nothing wrong with the DNS entry.

You were just querying it wrong

Top UK e-commerce sites fail to protect 'password' password-havers from selves


correct horse battery staple

Cable thieves hang up on BT, cause MAJOR outage


Re: Once the cable's gone, they need to use their mobile

According to the intarwebs, it's 01883 731336

Birds Eye releases 'mashtags' social spud snacks


I was going to try and make a hash brown joke in here.

I couldn't think of one; someone help me out please

NYPD dons Google tech specs: Part man. Part machine. All Glasshole


Re: You just can't stop progress

Or, if they're running Linux it'd count down then find that the driver for the weapon was compiled for a different kernel version?

'I don't understand why they feel like they own the word CANDY'


Re: the app name was what now?

much upvote

Two guilty over 'menacing' tweets to feminist campaigner


Don't get it.

This was taken from a campaign to have a woman's face on banknotes?

EVERY Bank of England note I've owed, except for one, has had a woman's face on.

App to manage Android app permissions


Re: Looks dodgy as fuck

Protip 1: If you're going to post as AC, don't write in the EXACT STYLE you have a FEW POSTS EARLIER with your name attached

Protip 2: If you're going to post as AC, don't SIGN your post!

Very sincerely yours,

Anonymous Coward, AC


EC antitrust cops raid offices of Philips, Samsung, others


Price fixing?

I never understand how price fixing works.

Let's say that I can manufacture a McGuffin device and sell it for £5, with all the proper margins and everything, and Contoso, Northwind and Fabrikam are charging £20 for it.

We'll assume here that my McGuffins and their McGuffins are of similar quality.

The other manufacturers would have to find a way to lower their prices to compete, or I would be able to say "These guys are charging £20 for this. I could sell for £15, make more money and still undercut them"

If the latter happened, then the others would likely drop to £15 to match.

In this scenario, which is probably completely different to the one in the article, some would cry "Price fixing!" while others would say "Market effects"

Tesco instore bakery bread is about £1 a loaf. ASDA instore is about £1 a loaf. Hovis charge about £1.20, as do Kingsmill.

Is this a bread price fixing cartel, or just aligning prices to the market?

I'm not an economist, I'm just a reader with an opinion.

Thai man reportedly dies clutching his scorched iPhone 4S


Jesus Phone shall smite those who darest to use an unapproved charger in violation of the Commandments with lightning

If this doesn't terrify you... Google's computers OUTWIT their humans


I'm not sure what the lesson here is?

The story here is either:

1) Google's software can spot things in images that the coders didn't expect them to

2) Google's coders can't recognise a paper shredder

Microsoft fears XP could cause Indian BANKOCALYPSE



How long has the support cycle been known for?

There's only 100 days left? You've had at least 2 years warning!

With Y2K, people saw the problem coming, they tested it, they worked around the problem so the effects were negligible.

With the XP EOL, people refuse to see the problem coming, bury their heads in the sand and hope for the best.

This is why the two should not be compared.

Google preps Chrome password-blab bug fix


Remember kids: Chrome is the fastest and most secure browser.

UK.gov BANS iPads from Cabinet over foreign eavesdropper fears


“I think my phone has been modified by GCHQ enough that it'd [bugging] be difficult, but I'm sure the Chinese have had a good go,"

It's so full of GCHQ monitoring that there is no room for anyone else's

New Bitcoin exchange launches in the UK


Re: Also

My password is monkey2013, not x.

I guess I don't meet the standard.


Re: British Silk Road

The holistic approach?

The drug deal is done with Bitcoin, then chopped up with a bank card, then inhaled via a note.

Ahhh, SATISFACTION: Watch while we set a NAS on FIRE


Re: Channelling Mythbusters


A while back I managed to put the data transferred during the BBC Olympic coverage into floppy disc tonnage (32,900t)

I was going to get a count of termites, but my VERY quick Googling only returned people asking how much a termite weighed but no answers.

If you were to post that many termites first class, one termite per envelope, it would cost £285,714 in stamps


Re: Channelling Mythbusters

That's a lot of termites!

Do Not Track W3C murder plot fails by handful of votes


Re: Yay, new standards

"The point being that a default on setting would be so ubiquitous that ad agencies would ignore it, rendering it pointless"

So we'll get the httpd to ignore it instead, saving the ad agency the time and effort!


Yay, new standards

Let's see if I understand some of the history of this right.

A new standard was proposed, the DNT header.

Unlike their usual behaviour, Microsoft didn't wait for a finalised version before adding support for it to IE.

They then set it to default, which is likely to be what most users would set it to anyway. "Would you like to be tracked? Yes/No"

Apache then said "IE is supporting this and pushing it by default, therefore we shall ignore this header"

W3C are now debating it further and not really liking the idea now

Is that paraphrasing close?

RIP charging bricks: $279 HP Chromebook 11 charges via USB


Same idea at the same time. Awesome.


This thing has a USB sockets to connect devices to.

This thing can charge via USB.

Charge it once off the mains and you'll never have to do that again!

Java updates too much of a bother? Maybe online banking's just not for you


Re: Do most people need Java any more?


How much will Apple cough for ebook conspiracy? Trial starts May 2014


Maybe each contract Apple write for the next years will have on it "Waaaa, the court says that we aren't allowed to offer these terms: A, B, C; so we're doing X, Y, Z instead."

There is a precedant for that

WAR ON PORN: UK flicks switch on 'I am a pervert' web filters


Re: Hmmm.... a Nanny State.


This comment thread now needs you to opt in to pr0n to see

FCC votes to bring faster internet to US schools


Misunderstood the title

I was wondering why First Capital Connect would be trying to delivery fast internet

Malware-flingers do it back-to-front : scaM snaps, spans Macs


Re: but Macs don't get viruses

Yeah, I was brainwashed to believe they were faultless.

El Reg must be lying about there being a problem with Macs

Report: Skype set up Project Chess to enable official snooping


Evil Micro$oft. Linux 4eva!!!

Despite reading several times that this was pre-takeover, I will take this opportunity to say that it is all M$' fault because reasons.

Linux am much betterer.

If you disagree, you're just not smart enough to understand why.

Can Microsoft's U-turn stop the Xbox 360 becoming another XP?


Re: C'MON MAN....

XP: The old version of Windows that people want to cling on to to avoid Windows 8

360: The old version of XBox that people want to cling on to to avoid XBONE

Title seems legit.