Posts by Rich 11

You are here => Earth is in 'the suburbs' of an immense heaven

Re: It's a long way down the high street to the chemists.

That's a pity, 'cos they've just put the kettle on.

Video: Dyson unveils robotic tank that hoovers while you're out

Sucks more

But if it can't also polish my shoes while it's down there, I don't care how good it is at sucking.

Scared of brute force password attacks? Just 'GIVE UP' says Microsoft

Re: Some truth to some of what they say

In other words they never hashed it in the first place.

Or it was reversibly encrypted.

Cops BUST RING, CUFF BLOKES in Skegness RAID

Re: Well that took long enough

They've only been operating completely openly like that for over twenty years now.

Over thirty years. You can (or could) see them at Mablethorpe and Cleethorpes as well (I never, ever bought any VHS tapes from them at all, never).

Hear ye, young cyber warriors of the realm: GCHQ wants you

Re: Well...

Really? My sources tell me it was █████████ -- but without the cauliflowers.

LOHAN packs bags for SPACEPORT AMERICA!

Longburn

In the US you can pretty well get them in Walmart

You'll find them next to the autorifle section, just along the aisle from the trained attack wolverines armed with rocket launchers.

Apparently it's where the Ferguson cops do all their shopping.

Hello, police, El Reg here. Are we a bunch of terrorists now?

Re: Two girls and a cup

Should everyone that looks at the crucifixion scene or a bloody Christ dying on the cross also be considered as terrorists ?

Not if they consider the crucifixion a just and lawful act. That would make them supporters of the Imperial Roman hegemony, not terrorists. However if they didn't consider it just or lawful, that might risk them being categorised as opponents of the regime, and potentially rebels, insurgents or terrorists.

So not the best comparison, really.

Caught red-handed: UK cops, PCSOs, specials behaving badly… on social media

Caption Competition

And two special constables were told to quit their voluntary jobs after being caught in a "compromising position" in a picture posted online.

"Is that a funny handshake or are you just pleased to see me?"

This'll end well: US govt says car-to-car jibber-jabber will SAVE lives

Vehicular kinetic energy exchanges

hopes to create a standardized vehicle-to-vehicle (V2V) system in which cars and small trucks can automatically share data about their speed and direction

That's nice. Now, what about big trucks? You know, those things with loads of blind spots.

e-Borders fiasco: Brits stung for £224m after US IT giant sues UK govt

Re: Here's a novel idea for the uk government

Yeah, but compliant politicians couldn't be rewarded with profitable directorships if that were to happen. So it won't happen.

Cargo truck crammed with garbage explodes IN SPAAAAACE

Maybe, if they'd made their way into a large lump of ceramic. Without a heat shield it's unlikely that anything larger than a drop of molten metal made it as far as the lower atmosphere. Rock or ceramic would be a better material to hitch a ride on (well, in), since it would ablate and in doing so carry away some of the heat, possibly allowing bugs in the middle of the lump to avoid pasteurisation.

Re: The big problem up there

The junk may be moving at 7km/s relative to the surface of the Earth, but anything else in low Earth orbit is going to be moving at much the same speed and general direction. That said, if you're out on a space walk and you get hit by something moving at even 10m/s relative to you, you're going to notice.

Drunkards warned: If you can't walk in a straight line, don't shop online, you fool!

Re: Oh, OK - Odd, But OK.

I don't need to be drunk to do any of that. Fortunately I can't type passwords properly when I've had a few, so I've also been able to avoid the drunken temptation to change all my passwords to something short and simple ('password1', perhaps).

You'll find Yoda at the back of every IT conference

Re: HA!

Nah, he's the one who had his boll-OCKS sliced off at the age of five.

Totes AMAZEBALLS! Side boob, binge-watch and clickbait added to Oxford Dictionary

Re: QFT

I still get annoyed at the BBC style guide which has a tendency to write acronyms in lowercase with the first letter capitalised!

In some cases that's quite reasonable (Nasa, for example, although I don't think they do Jaxa yet).

Re: QFT

Too right, get rid of LASER whilst you're at it

Laser is an acronym, not an initialism. It can at least be pronounced as a word (and over time become one).

What happens in Europe, doesn't stay in Europe: US giants accused of breaking EU privacy pact

Just goes to show...

Self-regulation is no regulation. Why do the politicians keep falling for it, when it fails time after time? Can't be anything to do with the potential for cushy non-exec directorships, can it?

Spin doctors crack 'impossible' asteroid hurtling towards Earth

Re: Prof. Hubert J. Farnsworth

Or push the Earth into a slightly wider orbit, fixing global warming and taking us out of the asteroid's path.

Get it right and we could also do away with the need for leap years.

Rosetta's comet 67P/Churyumov-Gerasimenko is one FUGLY space rock

Re: Beauty is in the eye of the beholder.

That and a Beckham direct free kick.

Snowden leaks show that terrorists are JUST LIKE US

which has repeatedly been aired by everyone from Sir Iain Lobban, director of Britain's GCHQ spy agency, who did so last year in front of a parliamentary committee

newly installed NSA chief Admiral Michael Rogers has played down the impact of the Snowden revelations on the spy agency's work

It's almost like one of them is lying.

Edward Snowden's not a one-off: US.gov hunts new secret doc leaker

Re: Somebody got a universal translator handy?

At some point in the future things will get so big and complex within the organization, circles within circles etc, that it will no longer be able to support its own weight and entropy will do its thing that it does with all systems which are out of balance.

For all we know it might already be the case that two-thirds of NSA employees are there purely to watch NSA employees. It would certainly explain why they have to rely so heavily on contractors!

Whoops, my cloud's just gone titsup. Now what?

Re: Not all bad news then

Every cloud has a silver lining.

What's the point of the Internet of Things?

Re: Deep Breathing . . . for Diving into Dark Web Pools

I can't believe I just upvoted an amanfromMars comment for what it actually said rather than how it was expressed...

Astounding: We're about to stick a probe in orbit of a COMET

Re: How do you say "AWESOME!!!" in European??

All I know how to say is "Can I get another beer?"

I think you'll find that should be "May I have another beer, please?"

;-)

Robot cars to hit Blighty in 2015

You always could drive to the pub. It's driving home afterwards that's problematic.

Help yourself to anyone's photos FOR FREE, suggests UK.gov

Re: If it's on Google it must be free

Intent - it's fucking magic.

Reg Latin scholars scrap over LOHAN's stirring motto

And who knows what the ablative of WD-40 is?

I find a blowtorch ablates WD-40 quite nicely.

UK govt threw £347m in the bin on failed asylum processing IT project

Re: Hmmmm ...

Why piss money away when a failed project (IT is far from unique in this respect) can move it from the pockets of taxpayers to special interests with no real accountability whatever.

That's certainly how it works in education and health, and arguably transport.

Report: American tech firms charge Britons a thumping nationality tax

Re: Tax????

Funny you mention medicine...because in the U.S....the cost of many medicines is much higher for U.S. citizens...than the exact same medicines...made by the exact same companies...in many other countries...such as Canada.

That's because the NHS and the like can negotiate bulk deals. If you Yanks had a proper healthcare system instead of one designed to bankrupt sick people, you might see a benefit too.

Cave pits, ideal for human bases, FOUND ON MOON

Holes in the ground

If it turns out they're no good for habitation, we can always use them to store all of our nuclear waste.

MYSTERIOUS Siberia CRATER: ALIENS or METEOR not involved, officials insist

Do you mean Morlocks?

CERN data explains how Higgs heavies other matter

It will create a greater number of more energetic collisions.

Plucky Rockall adventurer prepares to leave islet

Re: Brit adventurer?

If he lost a load of food it seems quite reasonable he'd want to leave before he started going hungry. He wouldn't want to risk a safe departure by being too weak to climb down safely.

US authorities round up ILLEGAL DINOSAURS for repatriation

Re: In this case

Except that taking artifacts wasn't illegal in the 18th or 19th centuries, at least not in many countries. Now it is, and rightly so.

UK gov rushes through emergency law on data retention

Re: Sunset clause

I forsee coalitions as being a way of life. Remind me, who do I vote for if I don't want this shit ?

The Greens.

Got to start somehwere, else it's just same-old, same-old.

Re: Can someone explain ...

I’m not saying that you are in a minority of one but you do perhaps have to respect the will of the masses.

Are the masses voting on this issue, after a healthy, well-informed public debate?

Didn't think so.

Man FOUND ON MOON denies lunar alien interface

Are you married? Well, a word of advice...

Universal Discredit: Gov admits Treasury HASN'T signed off biz case

He believes that everything is A-OK and all will be tickety-boo.

Boffins urge European Commission to reboot electric brain project

Where's the cheese?

They do say they want to try to model a mouse brain in this first stage; a human brain comes later. Much later, I'd say.

It's finally happened: Bloke builds BOFH-style goofing-off cattle prod

Slapping and zapping? Sounds like this Sethi bloke has, um, specialist interests.

Going up: Fancy a virtual flight to 30km above the PLANET?

Re: Or

I know it's only a couple of hundred yards, but the taxi fare would be a small price to pay to avoid getting mugged by seagulls down Chip Alley.

Boffins cage qubits inside superconducting silicon

"Joint Quantum Institute"

Would that be two entangled organisations?

Don't look at it else it'll collapse.

Labour vows: We'll pause one-dole-to-rule-them-all for drastic fix-up if elected in 2015

but there are plenty claiming benefits they are not entitled

There's a telephone hotline you can call to shop the thieving so-and-sos. Go on, use it. Or go tell the bloke in the pub who told you about the fraudsters to use it. Or did you get your info from the Daily Mail? Well, I suppose the DM journalists will have called the hotline then, won't they? No?

Firefighters deliver trapped student from GIANT GERMAN LADYPARTS

"Forceps!"

Damn you El Reg, Call me a Boffin, demands enraged boffin

Re: Down With Skool

Usually pronounced "boffeeeeeeeen" for some unfathomable reason.

An inability to communicate in standard English?

Re: Reaching out

Today's vomit-inducing neologism was the introduction of 'onboarding', used as a noun. I can just about guess what it means. I can also guess that my communications with that user will be kept to an absolute minimum.

Re: @stanimir

tl;dr / executive summary: Dr. > Prof. > boffin

(and sociologist > C. elegans)

Dr AC, I think you've got your less-than and greater-than symbols mixed up.

SPB's mountaintop HQ menaced by wolves

Away, wolves! No-one gets to eat my girlfriend except me.

For your next privacy panic, look no further than vending machines

Re: So Red Dwarf was right

"Hi, I'm Toastie Toaster, here for all your toasting needs."

"Smeg off!"

Google's driverless car: It'll just block our roads. It's the worst

Re: This driverless car stuff is nonsense.

> We'd have it already if we really needed it.

Yeah, that's why I was born with wings and a jet turbine.