* Posts by Tom 11

166 publicly visible posts • joined 4 Aug 2009

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BRUCE WILLIS (ad) DIES HARD (in Sky broadband telly fib ban)

Tom 11
Coat

What a Cop Out!

Alas, in the cold light of day it seems that old Brucey is just palying Surrogate to the BskyB Bandits. Maybe it was a Setup all along? after all, i always took him for No Body's Fool.

I hope this leaves him Red in the face.

Shadowrun Returns and Killzone: Mercenary ... old titles, new takes

Tom 11

Nice effort

But still lacking.... something....

SR was a nice 12 hours worth of gaming, but there is a slight tedious tide of ad nausium repetition towards the end.

If the narative wasn't as strong, and not helped along by stunning hand drawn environemnts I think I would've given up.

On a side note, the d-cell in my SNES copy of the original died years ago, so my last play through was without saves, leaving very toasty SNES waiting for after a week away with work. So the save function struck a familar chord.

Nude swimmers warned of GONAD-GOBBLING FISH ON THE LOOSE

Tom 11
Coat

Re: If he's an expert...

Yeah, he totally dropped the ball with that gaffe.

Tough luck, bumpkins! Blighty broadband speed gap misery worsens

Tom 11

meh...

In the centre of Sheffield I get 160 mbs from Dick Branson, quite often more. I've moved house to Killamarsh (10 miles away and the last suburb before rolling hills, and can only get BT toss, still 76mps though, so no major scrote throbbing there. The rents live in a tiny town outside of Matlock with no urban centre for 30 miles in any direction, they still get 36mbps.

Are you sure that everyone realises they actually have to pay top whack subscription to get decent service? some of the figures here seem pretty unbelievable.....

Happy first anniversary, Curiosity!

Tom 11

A year? Already?

And still no sign of my hoverboard :(

Plods probe death threat tweets to MP - but who will rid us of terrible trolls?

Tom 11

Re: Not sure whether trolling...

@ Theodore.

Perfect!

Everyone else who is still failing to comprehend the common understanding of Trolling (in our peer group of course) despite links being posted to help you, look at what young Theodore has produced. A classic example. He is not Bullying or rude, but someone is going to take that bait for sure!

I am actually starting to feel like we're approaching a paradox here, A Troll, trolling within trolling....

Trollception!

Tom 11
Headmaster

Not you as well.

I cannot understand this high-jacking of the term Trolls / Trolling. I'd say 99% of the readers on elreg understand the proper use of the term as we are all versed in its application. The context in which you use it, Kelly, is firmly that of the mainstream media (BBC et al) who fail to grasp what it stands for and who happily trot out the internet buzz word of the week without any comprehension of how it has entered common(ish) parlance.

Selfridges dreaming of a snot-themed Christmas

Tom 11

Maybe so

But that is indisputably the Sword of Omens he is wielding.

Wait!....

Thunder-cat-man?

Devolo dLAN 500 AV Wireless Plus: Triple-tech connectivity for the home

Tom 11

DDWRT!

I second that. DDWRT is a godsend for cobbling together infrastructure.

Sammy had Sweet Fanny Adams to do with Swiss Fanny madam's blast

Tom 11

Bill Ray, you are wasted

With titular tongue-twisting talents such as those paraded here, you quite clearly need a job writing headlines for the sun! love it :)

Burger-rage horse dumps on McDonald's: Rider saddled with fat fine

Tom 11

BMX Bandit

Up until about 4 years ago I used to ride my BMX to work at a BT ops center for shifts at bridge command, much easier to take shortcuts on a bike you can throw around, plus, at 'lunch' time (4am), the nearby skatepark in town was deserted, so fun was to be had.

If I was on the 7am to 7pm shift then I'd get breakfast on the way to work, if on the 7pm to 7am I'd get it on the way home. Never once was I not served and I think I became a bit of a fixture for the staff as I'd get the odd freebe thrown in if they were quiet. This rule must be a recent thing.

US Navy robot stealth fighter in first unmanned carrier landings

Tom 11

One step closer to forever,

Haldeman eat your heart out!

Live or let dial - phones ain’t what they used to be

Tom 11
Thumb Up

My mother

Still has one of these, not that she's a technophobe, but she keeps its putrid green bacolite shell hidden behind a curtain and uses a samsung wireless setup through the house. why? She simply likes the bell ring on the old set. Yes, it does still work as well as the day it was made.

Obama says US won't scramble jets or twist arms for Snowden

Tom 11
Trollface

Re: Master hacker me @Peter 45

Damn, so you had to do some work then? It's OK mate, we all try to pretend we're not sys admin, but the fact we're here reading el reg is implausible deniability

Korean doctors: Smartphones really ARE doing your head in

Tom 11

Ahhh, I see the Koreans have been influenced by our popular Western culture.

After all, Johnny Mnemonic had to appeal to someone somewhere....

Tom 11

Re: TBH

AC, look... the field... it's covered with blood!

El Reg rocket squad poised to select Ultimate Cuppa teabag

Tom 11
Thumb Up

Nooooo! can't believe I missed this first time around!

Yorkshire Gold Rowandan is the best bag on the market. I must confess that they rarely get used though, as when at home I use a Tea pig with a loose leaf mix of Assam and Lapsang (about 5 to 1 ratio). Both pig and mug filled with water straight off the boil. After 10 seconds the pig is emptied then filled with payload of Tea then water out of the same kettle WITHOUT REBOILING. 6 minutes with a gentle stir at 2, A dash of full fat milk until the tea becomes opaque rewards me with (in my tatses) a perfect brew that cannot be matched.

Unfortunatley, this dabbling has forced me to shun the more ghetto mainstream efforts of using a bag as it all tastes like hogwash in comparason. This has had the terrible consequence of me abandoning Tea at work in favor of a coffee percolator (for which I grind beans for the day freshly every morning) as I simply cannot take the pig to work as the time and faffing involed is simply not workable, also I'm IT operations for a global materials technology firm and if the workshop lads saw me with that I would be lynched!

Author Iain (M) Banks falls to cancer at 59

Tom 11

The true player of games succombs to his final obstacle.

Gan doon the craw road.

Paul Allen buys lovingly restored vintage V-2 Nazi ballistic missile

Tom 11

Re: Don't say I didn't warn you

Somebody set up us the V2!

'Catastrophic failure' of 3D-printed gun in Oz Police test

Tom 11

OMG everyones printing guns and killing each other!!

But not one comment on here mentions the availability of ammunition for said weapons. If you have access to black market ammo, then you have access to weaponry as well. As long as ammo is as controlled as weaponry then I cannot see why anyone making of these is any more dangerous than they were before, because if they can get ammo, then they could purchase guns.

IT bloke publishes comprehensive maps of CALL CENTRE menu HELL

Tom 11
Meh

Re: Wait, hasn't anyone told him this:

Sorry, Stevie, but for one, I am not in New York, and if you have voice navigation then simply utter something unintelligible several times over or repeat "advisor" will have the same effect.

Secondly, notice the caveat in my post: 90%? Meaning that I fully understand that some systems are BOFH proofed, but most are not, and to be honest, when I find one that is hardened to my back door intrusions it just makes me try harder.

Tom 11
Big Brother

Wait, hasn't anyone told him this:

Simply hammer # or 0 when you hit the first hit a menu 90% of the time this will plop you straight to a real person, and, quite often if it's a company with several call centres across the globe, it'll drop you to an English one as a default as they are more often than not the nerve centre of things rather than tech support or sales in India.

Steve JOBS finally DEFEATS the PC - from BEYOND THE GRAVE

Tom 11

Re: Isn't this a bad thing for the industry?

Short answer, No.

Long answer, as mentioned a couple of posts up, these numbers are surely caused by poeple buying their first tablet. The PC market will decline marginally, probably to the levels of sale 6 or 7 years ago when there were no alternatives for computing other than a full blown PC. The market for workstations will always be alive, wether it be for home user who actually want to be able to edit documents / manage data / image manipulation / wank over decent size pair or tits, with at least some ease of use or if it's in the workplace where anyone who honestly thinks they will get any sort of productivity out anything other than a workstation, it will not simply be replaced by what is essentially a computing periferal.

United Nations: 'Overpopulated Earth? Time to EAT BUGS'

Tom 11

Re: Nutritional (Graham)

Perhaps you might have heard then, considering your astute knowledge of this type of thing, that the microbes are not that main problem but the toxins created by said microbes during their digestive processes. Yes, we get some nasties from active 'microbes' (I'm assuming you mean Bacteria) such as Salmonella but as far as toxicology is concerned this is just a drop in a petre dish.

Pasteurisation will only be of any use to stop toxin accumulation by denying a culture establishment in the first place. It does not sure already tainted produce.

.

One of the world's oldest experiments crawls towards a fall

Tom 11

AH-HA!

So that's the secret ingredient in KFC gravy!

British bookworms deem Amazon 'evil'

Tom 11

Re: What sort of cretin buys a Amazon Swindle anyway?

@ Mr Fuzzy,

And that the email account from Amazon will convert most text formats and mail it out to your Kindle for no extra charge. I have had no problems with mine and I am not the sort of chap who owns anything produced by Apple, Sony or their ilk. As previously mentioned, Calibre and any text editor makes the Kindle an excellent device.

For an extremely cheap, well designed and thoroughly useful device and supporting services you cannot go wrong with a Kindle, so trolling AC, STFU and GTFO.

Galaxy S4 radiant, but has black holes

Tom 11

Lag??

I have to say, I have a Note I & a Note II, I am sure the portrate / landscape lag is intentional, those times where you accidenty tilt the phone slightly over its threshold to switch would be a real pain in the backside if it flipped the second it was triggered. I prefer the slight lag for the above reasons. The phone (especially Note II) is blisteringly fast, when you use one ,or an SIII it is apparent that merely fliping views views instanly is far beneath the devices capability, I'm sure this holds true for the SIIII also.

Rocket boffinry in pictures: Gulp the Devil's venom and light a match

Tom 11
Thumb Up

Nice work!

Thanks for that great article Lester, pictures really make it, the Soyez on the last page is magnificent :)

Free speechers want into Apple and Samsung sealed court filings

Tom 11
Facepalm

"want into"????

Come on, that is just painful. Did you go to school?

Photoshop fakery exposed by fake Photoshop tool

Tom 11

no no no no noooooo

No fucking irony SIMON, sort yourself out, what you have stumbled upon is plain old hypocrisy....

Congratulations, copyright infringers: You are the five per cent

Tom 11
Mushroom

Re: OK, case study....

AC, In which case why did he even bother checking Amazon for availability? Sorry, not chomping. £6.50 for a digital copy of a 10 year old book is daylight robbery. I'm not advocating piracy but more illustrating what causes it and the ramifications involved.

I believe the first book was 89 pence last year.

Tom 11
Angel

OK, case study....

A 'Friend' of mine recently went away for a few days with work, he was reading Virtual light on his Kindle, saw he had 45% of the book left to go so didn't bother loading any more material on to the device. On the second night he hit 79% of the book and it ended, the remaining 21% was adrivel and nonsense interview with the author. So, he went on Amazon to purchase a digital copy of the sequel, Idoru, sure enough he found pages selling the paperback for around £4, the digital copy was an astounding £6.50!!!

Not wanting to relinquish his upright stance, trousers around the waste nor lack of proximaty to a barrel, he found a torrent containing the novel he wanted and downloaded it over HSPDA using bittorrent for android in around 40 minutes, said torrent actually contained the complete works of Gibson.

He then activated the hotspot on his phone, connected his Kindle and mailed a text copy to his Kindle address which auto converted it into a readable format.

He would have gladly paid for a copy at a reasonable price, but due to lack of forsight and a generous helping of greed from the distributers, they have now lost out on any future purchases from this user of the autor in point.

Who are the real pirates in this story?

Twenty classic arcade games

Tom 11

@ killbot13 'Zero'

When you finish R-Type it just starts again even harder.....

Tom 11

No Alien Storm either

That one was totally unique for it's day, featured side scroling platform levels, high speed running levels, flying level and the ubiquitous 1st person sections AND bonus levels of smashing things ala' SF2 bonus style.

Was a real gem.

Boffins implant almost-cellphone in the BRAIN

Tom 11

5cm!!!

That's a pretty hefty chunk of grey matter!

BANG and the server's gone: Man gets 8 months for destroying work computers

Tom 11

It's harder than you think...

I work for a company that has a global presence. My colleague and I are ground up support for all ICT for all of Europe. Thats from mice to migrations. The problem I have is, we come along to a lab we've acquired and migrate our systems in place, generally they old regime would be running the entire network from a tower server under a stairwell or something similar. So we have the issue (and for example) in one site we have a 'server room' which is all very nice, black out blinds and aircon with a full rack, which is also the hard copy archive for finance. What boggles my mind is we have staff loyal to the previous employer who have keys to my server room and plenty of ammunition to go pissing around with my kit if they so pleased, times this by the number of sites I look after (12 and counting) and I have a potential nightmare situation......

Star Trek saviour JJ Abrams joins the dark side: Star Wars VII

Tom 11

@ Marvin

WTF!!! are you forgetting the quite litteraly mind blowing THX1138???? A masterpiece, I don't know how Lucas can have fallen so low after such an amazing film.

Microsoft blasts PC makers: It's YOUR fault Windows 8 crash landed

Tom 11
Mushroom

Dear Microsoft and estemed vendors...

Stop flinging shit at each other and digest the following:

TOUCH SCREEN IS NOT WHAT PEOPLE WITH HALF A FUCKING BRAIN WANT IN A COMPUTING DEVICE WITH ANY OTHER USE THAN GOOGLING, FACEBOOK AND CHECKING TV LISTINGS, ESPECIALLY FOR ANYTHING CLOSE TO ENTERPRISE. STOP SHOVING IT DOWN OUR THROATS!!!

I am so sorry to the rest of you guys, I never CAPS rant, that was my first and it was embarrassing, but I had to get that out, it was beginning to consume me.

Moon riven by colossal cracks

Tom 11

Re: Nah,

**** Globdule (sp)

(They still googlewhack though) ;)

Tom 11

Nah,

Rivulet or Golbdule.

They are the nicest words in our mother tounge.

AND they googlewhack!!! That's the first one I've ever found!!! :D

Tom 11

Is it me...

Or does that imaging map look spookily like the planetary mission screen from The Ur-Quan masters???

Ten weird Chinese mobile phones

Tom 11

Re: Michael Schumacher

Who would purchase.....

Guilable CEOs ;)

Meet the all-girl HPC cluster boffins of 'Team Venus' - on Video

Tom 11
Trollface

Re: Re: Its....

Indubitably....

In any case, who are you to judge the triviality of anothers view point?

Tom 11
Flame

Its....

fucking MathS SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS

Mission to Pluto faces DEEP SPACE DEBRIS PERIL

Tom 11
Headmaster

Re: Wow

The name Moon means natural satellite orbiting a non solar mass, a satellite does not have to be orbiting a mass classified as a planet to earn its monicker. So no, we won't have to rename them.

Sanitary towel firm's 'CEO' sets traumatised man straight

Tom 11

Re: Dr Alban

Aye, homebase totally bum raped that song, it is quite a glorious little song, I owned for a bout a week until I heard the first homebase advert, now they ruined it, same with 'Flat beat' & Levi :(

Valve's Half-Life

Tom 11

Half a page??

Lucy, come on! half-life was one of the most influential and ground breaking titles to have ever been released on PC, it deserves much more than the mild cap doffing you have given it!

Wanted! 4m-plus PC purchases to halt industry decline

Tom 11

Oh shut up, please...

VR pioneer invents 'illumination-as-a-service'

Tom 11
Facepalm

Re: Each light can be programmed to do 'most anything.

'most anything, so long as it only requires a source of illumination to be activated as the main crux of the request...

Fkin useless, did this guy fall off the shitter and smash his bonce?

And his start-up coffers..... WTF! how will this item of techno fluffery ever need that much money, how many of the things is he expecting to sell?? I would to see his market analysis model.

Besides, I think Philips already beat him to the punch...

How Nokia managed to drive its in-house Linux train off the rails

Tom 11
Unhappy

Re: N900 debacle ...

Double ditto,

My N900 was my top mobile, it still is when compared against its competition climate. My charging port fell out, phone was out of warranty by two weeks, bastards in Vodafone would not replace, I had to take a horrid Desire Z rather than the N9 I was waiting for :(

2 years on, I have a Note as company device, first phone I've had with no qwerty since N95 (also an astounding device for its day) I got on with it so well I now have a Note 2 as a personal device, though I still miss my qwerty more than any feature on a mobile device, when will the producers wake up to the market available for this type of device rather than creating for the masses.....

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