* Posts by bigphil9009

204 posts • joined 7 Jul 2009


James Webb Space Telescope may actually truly launch this century, says NASA


Scott Manley had a great line in one of his recent videos when discussing this matter and addressing the chances of the launch impacting Santa's ability to delivery presents at the right time:

"Don't worry, the James Webb telescope launching on time is just a story we tell our children at Christmas"

Hey, Walkers. What's the difference between crisps and chips? Answer: You can't get either of them


Hang on, they've been big again for years now! I suggest you try the stand-alone packets, not the ones in the multipacks. And they also now do Giant Monster Munch! Hmm, I might be a bit obsessed by Monster Munch...

Zuckerberg wants to create a make-believe world in which you can hide from all the damage Facebook has done


Re: Full presentation

Did I say I'd watched ONLY the first 10 minutes? Nope, that's because I hadn't yet watched the whole thing at the point of writing my post. Try not to leap to conclusions and be so judgemental eh?


Full presentation

A link to the full presentation: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XOn2CZWnxxY

I've watched the first 10 minutes - it truly is something to behold. I'm not normally one to comment on someone's appearance but it really does look like they have deliberately made MZ look like Data from TNG - a "meta" commentary on this thing trying to be like the Holodeck?

I can't believe he made it through the presentation with a straight face, and of course there had to be a single-speed fixie in the background at one point...

Don't touch that dial – the new guy just closed the application that no one is meant to close


Re: Pardon?

I think that was the joke ;-)

US Federal Aviation Administration issues draft assessment of SpaceX Super Heavy impact


Good point! Thanks! :-)


I wonder if NASA had to go through similar impact assessments before they were able to launch Mercury/Gemini/Apollo/STS or if it was just hand-waved through by virtue of being the gubernmint 'n all.

How to stop a content filter becoming a career-shortening network component


It's not wrong - we're Italian!

Back in the days of Exchange 5.5, our mail server would regularly fall over (by design, given that we were on the standard edition which limited the size of the EDB file to some stupidly low limit) because the sales team were hard at work swapping porn videos with their counterparts at the company's main retailers. After speaking to the CEO it was decided to implement content filtering in order to prevent this happening. Cue the Sales Director walking up to my desk, throwing his laptop down telling me that "I can't work like this! You can't stop us doing this - it's not wrong - we're Italian!". They guy was Australian, the company was the Australian arm of an Italian company.

The CFO then got wind of this and asked me if I could export all of the offending files and then delete them, thus freeing up space in the EDB. However, the request was firmly made to burn all of the offending material to a DVD before deleting it, so that he could, erm, "inspect" it all from home.

Those guys had some balls, I tell you.

Microsoft patches PrintNightmare – even on Windows 7 – but the terror isn't over


Re: Why?

I'd wager that it was the tone and holier-than-thou attitude you adopted in your post rather than any reference to disabling the print spooler on a DC...

Indian government reverts to manual tax filings as new e-tax portal remains badly borked a week after launch


At least have the courage to use your registered handle if you're going to spout such bigoted nonsense...

Intel finds a couple more 11th-gen Core chips, one hits 5.0GHz in laptops


Re: Intel are idiots.

Where's "StargateSG7" when you need him? I miss his nonsensical rants about his 100Ghz mega-super-duper chip built from unicorn poo and space diamonds. And all under a FOSS license too!

Accidentally wiped an app's directory? Hey, just play the 'unscheduled maintenance' card. Now you're a hero


Re: Ah!

If only it had added some sort of grammar checker ;-)

Philanthropist and ex-Microsoft manager Melinda Gates and her husband Bill split after 27 years of marriage


How's your open source GaAs AI-busting super-chip coming on buddy? I thought it was ready for release last year?

Or was it just a massive pile of hooey, like all of your boasts?

Microsoft realises constant meetings stress people out, adds Office 365 settings to cut them short or start them late


Re: Is it just me...

Great spot!! It totally is! :)


Alert! It is now Praise Time!

I would posit that if you have to set a reminder to give your team members praise, you probably shouldn't be a manager.

Praise that is prompted by an alert is no real praise at all. Praise should be ad-hoc, justified, meaningful and genuine.

Quality control, Soviet style: Here's another fine message you've gotten me into


Re: Ziebart.

Thank you! :D


Re: Ziebart.

I'm obviously thick (given the upvote count) but I can't work this one out - can someone help? Ta :)

A floppy filled with software worth thousands of francs: Techie can't take it, customs won't keep it. What to do?


Re: Even in the 1980's

So it might not have to have been done, but it sounds like it was done. The story is fun, and on the balance of probability it is probably true, so let's just enjoy it for what it is.

I suspect the downvotes are primarily from people who want to read a light-hearted story and not subsequently be lectured on how it should have been done, no matter how creative that lecture is :)

Planespotters’ weekends turn traumatic as engine pieces fall from the sky in the Netherlands and the US


Re: Quick turnaround for the 777?

Agreed - the Denver incident was with a twin-engine jet

Voyager 2 receives and executes first command in 11 months as sole antenna that reaches it returns to work


Re: Relativity

Although 15km/sec is incredibly fast for us small Earthlings, it is only 0.005% of the speed of light, which is far below the speed where any relativistic time dilation would start to have an appreciable affect.

However, it is true that its internal clocks will have been running faster than any on Earth, but that is as a result of it being far away from a gravitational field (in our case Earth's), rather than the speed it is moving at.


Re: The sad, but perhaps quite probable thing

Voyager will outlive most of humanity I'd have thought, albeit for very narrowly-defined values of "outlive".

Borkem ipsum: Supermarket gifts Thailand a tech fail that will echo down the millennia – and probably choke a turtle


Re: "Still. A nice design. Shame about the sub-editing."

I think that was kinda the point...

Virtual cycling service bans riders for doping – doping their data, that is


Re: How sad do you have to be ...

How sad do you have to be to criticise other people's completely harmless choices? You miserable sod.

World+dog share in collective panic attack as Google slides off the face of the internet


Re: The hard part…

"Redundant Department of Redundancy Department". Congratulations! You have totally melted my brain with that one. It feels like I'm one re-read away from entering an infinite loop...


Re: Try again *later*

Obligatory XKCD:


It's always DNS, especially when a sysadmin makes a hash of their semicolons


The only winning move is not to comment

This problem wouldn't have happened to me - I don't comment my code.

Worn-out NAND flash blamed for Tesla vehicle gremlins, such as rearview cam failures and silenced audio alerts


Re: Tesla has always operated in a reality distortion field

I'm hoping that they'll come out with a nice new water biscuit, maybe something flavoured with mint.

Voyager 2 is back online after eight months of radio silence


Re: You know you need coffee when..

I think they went from Non-bio to Bio, possibly with some added colour fasteners. ;-)

Remember when the keyboard was the computer? You can now relive those heady days with the Raspberry Pi 400


Tip o' the HAT

I'm familiar with most computing acronyms, but I have to admit that 'HAT' (as mentioned in the article) has got me stumped. Can anyone shed any light on this for me?

If you suddenly can't print to your HP Printer from your Mac, you're not alone: Code security cert snafu blamed


Re: jerry rig

Dury-rigging is where you hit things with rhythm sticks

SPARCs fly as Oracle recharges Arm server processor designer Ampere with $40m


You've been writing the same old claptrap here for so long now. "We are nearly ready... "we are going to..." "if we wanted to..."

My question is, why don't you?

BOFH: Will the last one out switch off the printer?


Agreed! Is all OK in Simon-land?

NASA is sending two small hand-luggage suitcase-sized spacecraft into the void to study binary asteroids


As did Alastair Reynolds - "Pushing Ice" is a great book about the mysteries of Janus. It's one of my favourite books of his.

Crack this mystery: Something rotated the ice shell around Jupiter's Europa millions of years ago, fracturing it


Re: That's what happens

Did you get out of bed on the wrong side this morning? Lighten up :)

Twilio: Someone waltzed into our unsecured AWS S3 silo, added dodgy code to our JavaScript SDK for customers



There was an unsecured S3 bucket,

Whose developers had said "let's just fuck it"

"We need this thing done,

Then off we can run

And our users? Well they just can suck it."

Star's rosette orbit around our supermassive black hole proves Einstein's Theory of General Relativity correct


Re: Theory?

The scientific meaning of the word "theory" differs from the generally accepted use of the word. Specifically, a scientific theory is reliable, rigorous and comprehensive (thanks Wiki!) which means it can be accepted as proven through mathematical rigour and consensus within the community. Physical proof is just another element of that rigour. The more general use of the word is analogous with the scientific use of the word "hypothesis". So Einstein's Hypothesis of General Relativity would require proving, through one of a few different ways, be it mathematical or observational, before it could be accepted (amongst the scientific community at least) as a Theory.

NASA mulls restoring Saturn V to service as SLS delays and costs mount


Thank you

For a small piece of normality and levity in this currently rather uncertain world. It's great to be reminded that life can carry on. Bravo!

BT providing free meals to coax its healthy customer support staff back into office as calls rocket amid pandemic


Re: asymptotic

I suspect the OP meant asymptomatic rather than asymptotic :)

Corporate VPN huffing and puffing while everyone works from home over COVID-19? You're not alone, admins


Re: Uptick in remote S/W sales

You said that already...

Want to own a bit of Concorde? Got £750k burning a hole in your pocket? We have just the thing


Re: Light the fire

But in a world where you have a gravatonic cavity wave FTL engine, why would you possibly need an archaic fuel-burning jet engine?

That is, unless you didn't actually have said gravatonic cavity wave FTL engine... perish the thought!

Put down the cat, coffee, beer pint, martini, whatever you're holding, and make sure you've updated Chrome (unless you enjoy being hacked)


Double standards?

It seems like Google are keeping schtum about their own vulnerability until sufficient users have patched, yet are trumpeting MS’s vuln from the rooftops - this seems like double standards to me, or am I missing something?

Shocker: UK smart meter rollout is crap, late and £500m over budget


Re: Home security problem

Not that I'm complaining, but should we be able to see all that documentation?

Cancelled in Crawley? At least your train has free Wi-Fi now, right?


Franchising Works!

On GNER... sorry, I mean ECML... sorry, I mean Virgin Trains EC... sorry, I mean LNER, one gets 15mins free WiFi before having to stump up (unless you buy from your ticket from their website, which isn't so good for us season ticket holders!). However, a quick change of MAC soon sorts that...

UK.gov IT projects that are failing: Verify. Border control. 4G for blue-light services. We can go on


Head above parapet

At risk of getting shouted at, and I don't believe in Big G's ability to deliver lots of complex IT services at the same time, but I recently used Verify.gov when the time came to renew my passport and I thought it was pretty good! Dare I say it but it was joined-up, painless and quick.

Sysadmin’s worst client was … his mother! Until his sister called for help


Skool Daze

Back in the mists of time, when I was a young'un and things were still in SD, I was sitting in class one day working away when the headmaster poked his head in the door and said to me those fateful words "your mother is on the phone". As some here will remember, in those pre-mobile days these words were code for "someone you love and care for has died and your life will never be the same again" so it was with a sense of foreboding that I made that long walk through the corridors to his office to pick up the receiver.

"It's gone! The whole thing is gone and all I have on the screen is a white page! All my bloody work has gone!"

She had pressed CTRL+N by mistake.

A Hughes failure: Flat Earther rocketeer can't get it up yet again


From the school of Richard Hoagland

After watching the first YT clip embedded in the article I notice he has adopted the same talking style as the Daddy of All Pseudoscientists Richard C Hoagland - talk in excruciating detail about the most inconsequential parts of the topic while avoiding saying anything of any substance regarding the main thing they are there to talk about.

He will go far.

(Probably about 1,000 feet before exploding in a shower of skin and muscle being blown from his bones, or something)

Another day, another Spectre fix slowdown: What to expect if you heart ZFS


And your performance "review" is somehow valid with the exact same lack of hardware configuration details?

This could be our favorite gadget of 2017: A portable projector


Re: Good lord.

Do you mean MDMA? That was synthesized early in the 20th century by a German pharma company I think. However, if by chemist you mean the great Alexander Shulgin then he did synthesise loads of analogues and tested them in himself and his friends (and even had a licence from the DEA to do so!) He was an amazing chemist and empath. I had a copy of PIHKAL when I was at uni that I bought from WH Smiths! Those were the days... Still, I'm probably on some list somewhere now!

Bill Gates says he'd do CTRL-ALT-DEL with one key if given the chance to go back through time


Re: Bill Rewriting History again

Err, I did just that, and no results on the first page even go so far as mentioning anything about BIOS-level resets. I didn't go past the first page of results because come on, who ever does that? ;-)

El Reg is hiring an intern. Apply now before it closes


The Spectator magazine ran a "blind recruitment" exercise for their recent internship which resulted in a 47 year-old mother of three getting the position who when interviewed on Radio 4 sounded like a pretty damn good recruit (and as a bonus, the Spectator got plenty of free, positive, publicity). Any chance of you guys doing something similar? Or are you just looking for a young 'un, and damn the Equality Act 2010? ;-)



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