* Posts by Danny 2

2212 publicly visible posts • joined 6 Jul 2009

Traffic lights worldwide set to change after Swedish engineer saw red over getting a ticket

Danny 2

Lewis traffic lights causing delays

https://www.pressandjournal.co.uk/fp/news/372064/lewis-traffic-lights-causing-delays/

The Press and Journal is being kind to Stornoway here. When their first traffic light was installed the locals would approach slowly, expecting it to change suddenly. They'd then turn off their engines at a red light. When they noticed it had changed back to green they'd go to start up their cars, and if they were lucky they'd get one or two cars through before it changed back to red again.

And where The Press and Journal describe "the busy approach to Stornoway", obviously it is not London or Edinburgh busy. It's not even East Calder busy. They had to slow down the speed of the traffic lights until they got used to the concept because the lights had caused traffic jams where there were none before.

BOFH: The company survived the disaster recovery test. Just. The Director's car, however...

Danny 2

It's a long, long while from May to Johnson

I've been ripped off by Virgin Media for the past year, during which time I ascended to a Silver badge here. I know, at best I am a Bronze badge compared to the mass of you. It was an ordeal to get me taken off the internet, a month from now. Still quicker than the UK can leave the EU.

I voted for Brexit, not for Johnson. Who the hell voted for Johnson? I want a confirmatory vote, a general election and a revolution, I'm just not sure in what order.

At least I know I am about to leave the internet. Before I go I'll post my postal address in case any of you want to send letters (downvotes).

Guess what's on the receiving end of more NASA dollars for SLS?

Danny 2

Re: 2024...hmm...Trumps 3rd term??!

"Trump became President 2017-01-20 so everyone is stuck with him (or Pence) until 2021-01-20."

Out of interest, if both Trump and Pence are impeached then who becomes President? Nancy Pelosi? Boris Johnson? Me?

Deus ex hackina: It took just 10 minutes to find data-divulging demons corrupting Pope's Click to Pray eRosary app

Danny 2

Re: I'm curious..

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Forbidden_fruit#Apple

Danny 2

The Pope isn't an EU citizen

Boris Johnson is an EU citizen.

The Vatican is not democratic enough to join the EU.

Britain is too democratic to leave the EU.

The detail is in the devil.

Danny 2

Ave Satani

The Omen! It is worth noting that we geeks fact-checked those wannabe Satanists,

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ave_Satani#Lyrics

I have to admit that in Scotland we didn't catch the lyrics, and that chant is known as "Dah dah dah dah. Dah dah dah dah. Dah dah dah dah deh"

Another shitey anecdote. All the tough punks went to see The Exorcist at our local cinema when they were too young, and all of them left in fright. That made the movie just irresistible to the rest of us. A girl invited me - and this just didn't happen back then- and then in her bedroom she confessed how she'd stabbed her older sister in her stomach. And then I had to go and watch The Exorcist and Friday The 13th with her.

I was so terrified of my date that I missed out on the movies. What sort of a first date tells you she has already been arrested for stabbing her sister? Did I put my arm around her in the cinema? Aye, right, I kept my hands around my stomach.

Women, don't stab your sister no matter how much she deserves it. And certainly don't tell your date after.

The Exorcist didn't scare me, Friday the 13th didn't scare me, but the girl sitting next to me scared the bejesus out of me.

Danny 2

Saint Isidore of Seville

Saint Isidore of Seville was well known in his time as a tireless scholar and historian, he was later called “the last scholar of the ancient world”, and it is this studiousness and love of information that lends itself to his modern patronage.

Per the Roman Catholic Church, Saint Isidore is the patron saint of computers and their users, programmers, and repair men, as well as the Internet as a whole. So the next time you’re faced with a computer problem of such magnitude as to require a miracle to fix it, rest assured Isidore is on it.

Apparently he invented the first Wikipedia, his Etymologiae had quaecunque fere sciri debentur, "practically everything that it is necessary to know".

Pack your pyjamas, Zuck: US bill threatens execs with prison for data failures

Danny 2

PJs

I hate to break this to you but you aren't allowed to take your own pyjamas into prison. Ach, maybe Zuckerberg would, Jeffrey Effing Epstein was allowed to spend six days a week at his office during his first arrest. But for you or me, no silk pillow cases and a very low thread count on the Egyptian cotton sheets.

Good news – America's nuke arsenal to swap eight-inch floppy disks for solid-state drives

Danny 2

Re: Nostalgia

India - Pakistan scares me the most. I mean Trump asking to nuke hurricanes is scary, but I have every confidence his generals would just ignore him.

Danny 2

Nostalgia

I worked for a council whose councillors didn't trust magnetic storage and insisted on paper print-outs of everything that was stored in the council basement. All the print on the paper had faded to unreadable. It was basically a bonfire in waiting.

My mum worked at the government computer centre that printed giros for folk on benefits. The programmers printed me a picture of Snoopy in xxxx's when I was six. That was the coolest thing ever when you were six in the early 1970s.

I grew up in an era where we had constant nightmares because we were '7 minutes to midnight'. We are now 2 minutes to midnight and nobody seems to care.

Help! I bought a domain and ended up with a stranger's PayPal! And I can't give it back

Danny 2

I had a Facebook account that I only ever used to log in to third party sites. The last time I tried to log in it made me change my password via email, which was fair enough as I hadn't logged in for years. Then it asked me to contact three out of four 'friends' it had selected to vouch for me. One of them is dead, another is someone I only knew via Facebook so not really contactable unless I set up a fake account to contact them. I'd quite like to delete the account as it's slightly disconcerting that a dead guy has a stronger social media presence than I do.

A History of (Computer) Violence: Wait. Before you whack it again, try caressing the mouse

Danny 2

I was sent by a Dutch company to their German subsidiary to implement a corporate NT domain over two decades ago. One German engineer was shadowing me to basically take care of me, and he was not enjoying that. On the second evening I tested the Group Policy and he got locked out of the network, and rather than ask me to unlock it he picked up his laptop and smashed it into his desk until it was little bits and pieces. I said, "Okay, let's call it a night then."

The German MD was a lovely guy, but some of the staff acted as if they've been invaded by the Dutch.

It was also the only time anyone ever tried to bribe me. A local subcontractor was rejigging the network cabling and making an arse of it, and their manager had noticed I was a Scot and a drinker and offered me a very old Macallan, worth several hundred pounds. It was just sitting in his house and he'd thought I might like it. I was a tad insulted but politely and repeatedly declined. When I was back in the Netherlands I told my manager and he was shocked - "Of course you should have taken it and given it to me, can you phone him up and ask if it's still on offer?"

I was never sure if he was joking, but I know he was delighted that I'd annoyed the German engineer so much that he'd trashed his laptop.

I was in the Netherlands for years, and the sole time anyone bought me a pint was when Scotland beat Germany at football.

Mark Hurd is dead

Danny 2

Dick Laurent is dead

We can be cold. Wife and two daughters folk, could well be reading this.

Have you ever played that game where you pick a name out a hat and then have to describe them as quickly as possible?

"Was in the Beatles and then got shot"

John Lennon's entire life and work dismissed in the heat of battle between frankly worthless players.

I would love for my epitaph to be, "Was in the Beatles and then got shot", but at best I'm only going to achieve half of that.

We're going deeper Underground: Vulture clicks claws over London's hidden tracks

Danny 2

Re: 20 MPH zones

Have an upvote! I hope you also smiled when clicking.

I'll have you know Julian Cope is a national treasure, and so deserves to be buried underground.

Danny 2

Re: 20 MPH zones

My apologies A.P. I normally just post lyrics, and will type them out for you as penance knowing fine well everyone will hate this.

If you get a message coming out of the stars you must hide away

And if you get a message coming out of the stars you must hide away

If you get a message coming out of the stars

Don't believe in luck you are in touch with Mars

And you must hide away, you must hide away

These collapsing nations and the weight of the West make us hide away

And these collapsing governments that pole axe us with taxes make us hide away

It's just a suggestion, congestion

Grab it and then hide way

You've got to hide way and go underground

London Underground

~ Julian H. Cope

Danny 2

Re: 20 MPH zones

I get heavily downvoted every time I post song lyrics here. I get it, it diminishes the forum and nobody likes the music I like. I'll stop doing that, tomorrow.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u5oSdwn696c

Danny 2

20 MPH zones

Most of central Edinburgh now has 20MPH signs where they used to have 30MPH signs. There's been no enforcement so far, but cars have started driving at 30MPH where they used to drive at 40MPH.

We like to break the law, but not too much.

I discovered the world's last video rental kiosk and it would make a great spaceship

Danny 2

Re: "It's not enough to blame the internet"

"until circa the early part of this decade"

Referee! Is he allowed to use 'circa' that way?

I mean, he is maybe not technically wrong but surely it's puffery.

"until ABOUT the early part of this decade"

I had a pretentious acquaintance who was an OCD film buff but hated foreign languages who learned the word 'denouement' from Empire Magazine. After that, every conversation included him using the word. Circa 1990.

Danny 2

We Set Sail From Disaster

My mum and I had planned to go see 'Official Secrets' at the cinema today but it's not on anywhere near her. Instead I suggested buying 'Chernobyl' on Amazon Prime since she doesn't have Sky Atlantic, and it's meant to be good. She instead bought it on DVD so her sister could borrow it. I had to point out we no longer have a DVD player, we are going to have to watch it at my aunties flat. We still have a VHS player, my dad bought one we've never used 'just in case', but we forgot to keep an emergency DVD player.

My dad was never overly fond of his in-laws, and he warned me once that I was being talked about in the same breathe as bad Uncle Davie and mad Aunty Iris. He meant it as a rebuke for being too weird. "Cool, they are my two favourite relatives."

People who read books are regarded with suspicion in my family. Some sort of witchcraft going on.

Danny 2

In Finland they put their babies in cardboard boxes and leave them outdoors so their crying doesn't wake you.

I know this is going to prompt a flurry of, "We never had cardboard boxes when I were young" responses, but it's true. Apparently. Finns claim it is true but now I think back on it I never actually saw any babies in boxes in Helsinki.

Guess who's dreaming of facial-recog body cams now? US border cops: AI tech sought to scrutinize travelers

Danny 2

Re: Erm....

Please tell me more about these "I can afford $100 to prove I'm not a terrorist" cards.

I went to the consulate to get a visa in '85, a lifetime visa which was a rip-off since the passport had a shorter life than mine, and we had to fill out a form saying we weren't terrorists, communists or Nazis, and that none of our family were either.

Boiling hot day, packed tiny room, and the wee old woman in front of me hadn't filled out her form so the clerk had to shout the questions at her. "Eh, no son, I'm not a terrorist."

Turns out though that her dead husband had been a communist, a trade union activist from Ayr in the 1930s. "People used to come around when they had a problem, and he'd sort it. Please son, I just want to visit my daughter, I'm not a communist myself. I always left the room when they talked politics."

It made the experience fun, and to their credit the US of A permitted her entry.

Danny 2

Fifteen years ago I grew a long beard and wore a pakol (pashtun hat) because I thought it was funny how much I looked like Osama Bin Laden. I had to lose the hat and beard because it became scary how much everyone else agreed. It might have worked at a fancy dress party but I was protesting outside military bases at the time and it was not a good look around armed police. I mean, people make money acting as celebrity look-alikes but my doppelganger was unfortunate.

I'll be avoiding the USA now this software is being deployed.

Junior minister says gov.UK considering facial recognition to verify age of p0rn-watchers

Danny 2

I would quite this tech for alcohol purchases at self-service checkouts. It would save me minutes each week.

UK culture sec hints at replacing TV licence fee, defends encryption ban proposals and her boss in Hacker House inquiry

Danny 2

Re: Raspberry Pi TV detector van detector kit

Hilarious, comedy genius. And they could be very small vans.

I used to work in a very hi-tech company opposite the TV detector van company in Cumbernauld. There must have been at least 50 vans, and over three years none of them moved. Because everyone knew by then that they were fakes. They couldn't detect shit on their shoes.

Danny 2

Can I ask if your threatening letters are addressed to you by name?

I get one a week, but they are always addressed to "The Householder".

Danny 2

Re: Yes please...

Thankin' you, John Brown.

I would like to point out I was in the middle of a fight with my girlfriend, so I was all het up.

I also missed out part of the story. I honestly hadn't had a TV for years, a fact that made my IT colleagues ask me, "What century are you living in?" because I didn't know about Star Trek NG.

I was fixing a neighbours TV, and it was in pieces on my living room floor. The TV detectorist thugs said they'd seen it through my windows, so I explained I was just fixing it for a neighbour. They said I needed a licence for that, and I said I didn't because I wasn't going to turn it on, and didn't even have an aerial. "Well, how are you intending to check if it works?"

"That's a multimeter, that is an oscilloscope, this is an engineer. If you'd went to further education then you wouldn't be making a fool of yourself on my property"

I was totally in debt to my awful girlfriend who'd hyped me up. Her response was more succinct.

There are a lot of myths that keep people fearful and compliant. Off the top of my head, you don't have to register to vote. You don't have to attend jury duty. You don't have to pay local taxes. You don't have to pay the BBC tax. I don't feel I am above the law, more likely I'm below it.

Danny 2

Re: Yes please...

It wouldn't have bothered me, I didn't actually have a shotgun. I just applied for the licence because all the pensioners owned one and it seemed like an arms race. This was a tiny (100 people, 100 cats, 25 dogs) village in the Scottish countryside.

I do have a funny story. I was at work so this is second hand. A huge gang from Wester Hailes came to our wee village to lynch some crim who had been given sanctuary there by a local. They had baseball bats and machetes. They were scared away by octogenarians brandishing shotguns.

Well, I laughed at least.

Danny 2

I love BBC radio

I am always so negative about BBC TV I have to add I love BBC radio, and the website. BBC Radio 4 and BBC Radio Scotland kept me sane when I was stuck alone for six months, like Tom Hank's basketball. I was in a remote place in Scotland and I'd wake up every morning and turn on the radio just to hear human voices. I especially enjoyed the traffic reports. When you are living in a wood and haven't seen anyone for ages you start to doubt your life choices, and the reports of traffic jams on the M8 are joyously reassuring.

I know you get the radio and website without a licence now, but it does come out of the fee so I'd be willing to chip in for them. I hate how iPlayer insists you register and sign in just to get radio, that seems churlish. As is folk in prison for not paying their fines. As is the ~500,000 dementia sufferers who are now expected to pay for a licence - if they can't remember watching it, did they really watch it?

The Beeb claim they need more revenue to compete with Netflix and Amazon, and that is ridiculously grandiose. Nobody wants them to compete with those services.

Another option would be a two-stream BBC. A basic one paid for by tax-payers, and a luxury one paid for by subscription.

Danny 2

Re: Yes please...

I refused to contact them to let them know I don't watch live TV, and I've received a threatening letter every week for the past six years. I object to the environmental waste but I keep it going because it helps subsidise Royal Mail.

It is cheeky/unjust that I can't watch commercial TV stations so I'd support a subscription service. I wouldn't subscribe, but I support the idea.

Here is an idea to save the BBC money, sack anyone on screen who earns more than the average wage. You'd have an army of volunteers replacing them just to get their faces on the telly. I was going to call the existing presenters 'Talent' but that would be too sarcastic.

[The only visit I from TV licensing guys was when I first had a cottage and a girlfriend. They interrupted an argument we were having about how little housework I did. She answered the door, and slammed it hard on them screaming, "Don't ask me, I only work here!"

I answered the next time, she'd stomped off fuming, and they asked me if I had a licence. I replied I had a shotgun licence and they were standing on my property without my permission.

His reply was priceless, "I'm going to tell my boss about you!"]

Hundreds charged in internet's biggest child-abuse swap-shop site bust: IP addy leak led cops to sys-op's home

Danny 2

My worst week at work

My employer was an imaging company trying for a NHS contract. My job was to scan in and digitise medical records that I still doubt I should have been able to see. And I had to view and read them to verify the accuracy. It was traumatic. It was all dead kids. Their X-Rays, their case history. I assume the NHS contact chose the worst files to digitise to scupper the contract. Five year olds with cancer. It floored me, but I did it.

It made me realise two things, that I had led a sheltered and privileged life, and that the nurses who actually had to deal with these children deserved a far higher salary than mine. That was thirty years ago and I'm crying again. I can only sympathise with the under-paid workers dealing with sexual abuse content.

Danny 2

Operators of anonymization services like Tor must ask themselves...

Things That Make You Go (cough)(bullshit) Hmm...

The bulk of the funding for Tor's development has come from the federal government of the United States,[22] initially through the Office of Naval Research and DARPA.[23] - https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tor_(anonymity_network)

Remember the Democratic National Committee email leak? Same hackers now targeting EU countries, say malware boffins

Danny 2

RegDuke?

You do not have to say anything but...

Well, well, well. Fancy that. UK.gov shelves planned pr0n block

Danny 2

Cummings

Public nudity is not a big deal in the rest of the EU. I've seen Dutch workers sunbathe topless outside their work, experienced a French nudist beach accidentally, communal naked saunas in Finland including children, and just mass German nudity, yet in the UK our bodies are an affront to God.

I support our current laws. British people should not be allowed to disrobe in public - have you seen our bodies? We are like Americans.

Nobody who isn't an athlete should be allowed to wear Athlete-wear. Yes, your bum looks big in that.

Danny 2

Re: Yay!

I remember in first year at high school a boy was called a wanker, and he owned it and made it a badge of pride. "Aye, I'm a wanker, and in a year or two you will be too"

I stole that. A decade ago a young guy smirked at me and called me a dirty old man. I told him if he lived long enough then it is the fate of every dirty young man to become a dirty old man.

Tinfoil-hat search engine DuckDuckGo gifts more options, dark theme and other toys for the 0.43%

Danny 2

Dodging cookies, dunking donuts

Well I must admit I'm flattered by your consecration

It's a mind-numbing spine-chilling

But never-the-less heart-warming gesture

But as you make your advances so clumsily

I'll save us both the both the hassle and leave

And hang out all night

In the familiar fluorescent light of dunkin' donuts

'cause I ain't got time for the niceties

Or rather I was never never fond of the niceties

I will see you around

See you around

See you around

See you around

Well how are you with issues

Lately you've been a half-assed activist

You've been seen sashaying around the picket line

Wearing scarcely any sign

Oh but always vocal in love and strife

And the politics of your all important life

Well I'm sorry but your routine is coming off a bit ragged

And I ain't got time for the niceties

Or rather I was never never fond of the niceties

I will see you around

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zzYNpIZqtTo

Danny 2

Re: Study philosophy!

Of course you should have upvoted it even if you don't understand it! Study Philosophy is great advice. Relax with Comedy is also great advice.

Agathon: I’m afraid the world is bad. You have been condemned to death.

Allen: Ah, it saddens me that I should cause debate in the senate.

Agathon: No debate. Unanimous.

Allen: Really?

Agathon: First ballot.

Allen: Hmmm. I had counted on a little more support.

Simmias: The senate is furious over your ideas for a Utopian state.

Allen: I guess I should never have suggested having a philosopher-king.

Simmias: Especially when you kept pointing to yourself and clearing your throat.

Conspiracy loons claim victory in Brighton and Hove as council rejects plans to build 5G masts

Danny 2

Re: Give teenages the vote ...

"5G mast will be compulsory every few yards"

Given their lack of power that is a fair assessment. It will need an urban forest of masts.

The first home I bought had a three digit Bakelite telephone, that British Telecom stole when my guinea pigs chewed through the cord. British Telecom broke into my house to steal the phone, even back in 1990 it was worth a few hundred quid. And my telephone number at the time - 237.

I threatened legal action and they threatened my pigs.

Whitehall 1212

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uAZbDAA2y50

Danny 2

Don't drink the Irn Bru

I was working for a Scottish comms company back in the good old nineties. I won't name the name but suffice to say they are now Cisco. I was told I was the creme de la creme to be employed there, ala Miss Jean Brody. When I walked out of the interview they begged me to come back and upped my salary by 25%. I should have walked but I was flattered.

Most of the kit we were testing and integrating was xDSL, but we had to support microwave links too. Two younger engineers, green out of Uni, left their lunch next to a microwave relay. They were freaked by their bottle of Irn Bru left next to the transmitter. Carbonated bubbles were running up the side of the bottle closest to the transmitter, and the youngsters wanted to know why. None of us had an answer beyond, "It's probably just leaking microwaves."

They refused to work on it any more, and decided to pour their Irn Bru down the drain. I drank their Irn Bru.

[For American readers, replace Irn Bru with 'Kool Aid']

Danny 2

In 2013 a police helicopter crashed into a Glasgow pub, the Clutha, killing ten people. The inquiry found the tech failure, but never identified why it was flying over it in the first place.

The very next week I witnessed a police helicopter flying over my and neighbouring flats, hovering over each for 30 seconds, and then moving on to the neighbouring flat. They were obviously searching for a heat signature linked to cannabis farms. I don't care if my neighbours smoke or grow cannabis, I just don't like the police putting my life at risk trying to track them down.

An old feminist mantra was "Keep your laws off my body", and I think that is universal. Certainly keep your helicopters and planes away from my roof.

Danny 2

Re: Many microwave ovens leak microwaves

Sure, and I get that it's not damaging to us as it's non-ionising radiation. I'm also aware that non-ionising radiation is a major cause of error in electric/electronic devices such as microprocessors. And historically pacemakers.

Danny 2

Re: "...and the doctors published advice [...] not to be near a working microwave oven"

>"or at another one busting the myth "About Devices that Can Interfere with Pacemakers"

Hilarious epic fail!

I linked to someone qualified who tested ovens, and you ignored that, patronised me (who actually worked with microwave comms kit as a tester) and then cited a website that produces medical jewellery - although misspelling it jewelry

"Hope Paige Designs has fashionable medical identification bracelets and medical jewelry for cardiac patients and those with peanut allergies, diabetes, and more.

About Us

Hope Paige Medical ID Marketplace, mixes fashion and style with function and purpose as one of the foremost designers of contemporary medical emergency bracelets, awareness jewelry, and licensed designs. "

Muppet.

Danny 2

Re: Many microwave ovens leak microwaves

Well, the citation is anecdotal, the surgeon telling my mum. Now it could very well be my mum just lied about that to get my dad out of her kitchen.

I honestly don't know what you and Alister read in my post that troubled you. I do know this stuff, I used to test microwave comms kit, and I have a few stories.

I think it is best to outsource this to PhysicsGirl though - Can you call a cell phone in the microwave?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ot4_jVFXxUU

[The lesson everyone has to take from that is to wrap your phone in tinfoil. Better Call Saul.]

"They are being put on top of the tallest buildings in the area, and their height is to ensure that nobody gets fried if walking on the roof."

Wrong, the height is to maximise coverage, nothing to do with frying people. You are scaremongering now.

Danny 2

Re: Who cares?

"Given that (a) some people believe all this EM is bad for them" - jmch

Some EM is definitely bad for you to arguable degrees, but provable amounts. Some crazy folk used to claim microwave ovens are a serious health risk, and yet now they are everywhere and nobody has been harmed, right? Wrong.

My dad was fitted with a pacemaker and the doctors published advice is not to be near a working microwave oven, because many of them leak and can damage his pace maker and potentially kill him.

Many microwave ovens leak microwaves, and if it is not safe for someone with a pacemaker to be in the same room as one then it is probably a good idea that nobody is.

I'm not saying 5G is a health threat, I seriously doubt it, but precautionary principle and past experience suggest more caution than is being discussed here. We don't really do credible medical testing in the tech world. We do understand the inverse law of distance.

Stand back from your microwave oven, or check for leaks. Don't put that 5G pole in your garden until the studies have been done, put it in your neighbours garden or down the street.

We're free in 3... 2... 1! Amazon unhooks its last Oracle database, nothing breaks and life goes on

Danny 2

Is Amazon Unstoppable?

There is a great article on Amazon on The New Yorker. It's not techie but it is in-depth and worth reading, covering the dick-pics, union busting, and everything in between.

https://www.newyorker.com/magazine/2019/10/21/is-amazon-unstoppable

A spot of after-hours business email does you good, apparently

Danny 2

Whip-crack-away, whip-crack-away, whip-crack-away

Oh, the Deadwood stage is a-rolling on over the plains

With the curtains flappin' and the driver a-snappin' the reins

A beautiful sky, a wonderful day

Whip-crack-away, whip-crack-away, whip-crack-away

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x_xmujSyxkU

Scariest thing about Halloween? HMRC and Defra systems still a risk to post-Brexit borders

Danny 2

drug and human/sex trafficking and probably countless other nefarious deeds

Human/sex and other nefarious deeds? Are we talking sheep on mushrooms, llamas on cocaine, deer on speed, chickens on ketamine, or what?

I'll forgive the VAT fraud if you keep it in your pocket.

Telstra chairman: If those darn kids can earn $5m playing Fortnite, why can't execs?

Danny 2

There is a brilliant Netflix comedy special, "Iliza Shlesinger: Elder Millennial | Gather Round | Netflix Is A Joke"

If you don't have access to Netflix here is the relevant taster: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CWsJPr3ML4M

Private equity to gobble up Brit virus blocker Sophos for £3bn

Danny 2

MacAfee

How is the brand name MacAfee still a selling point?

It's akin to advertising "The Michael Jackson Creche and Kindergarten".

Apple insists it's totally not doing that thing it wasn't accused of: We're not handing over Safari URLs to Tencent – just people's IP addresses

Danny 2

Define Legal Consent Versus Competence

I don't know if there has ever been an opinion poll of the public asking how many people know what an IP or MAC address is. In the past decade I've tended to try in vain to train elderly folk who repeatedly ask, "What is a browser? What is a folder? What is a cookie"

I used to teach youngsters who'd all instantly assume they were hackers, that was worse.

I'm sure most if not all of us here are aware of what we give legal consent to online, but it feels akin to sexploitation of 98% of the population by our industry.

Boris Brexit bluff binds .eu domains to time-bending itinerary

Danny 2

Re: Yes, EU Minister

Some folk really do assume Dutch is a secret code. It's a pretty obvious code at best.

My first trip to Coulport and I was with a dozen European peace protesters, none Dutch or Flemish but all of whom had lived in Ghent for at least a year.

We were all chatting away and then they switched to Flemish because they suspected I was a Scottish police infiltrator. I'd actually spent the last few years contracting in the Netherlands and Belgium, and had followed their 'secret' conversation fairly well. One of them had suggested leaving the camp so they could discuss their plans away from me, and the main guy said, "Waroom?"

I chipped in, "Waroom neit?", and all their cheeks blushed like a busted flush.

The main guy asked me in shock, "You speak Flemish?"

"Nee. Lekker ding. Moi ledden. Alstublieft."

There were two Finns there. Now Finnish *is* a code language to me, much more akin to bird song than human language.