* Posts by lukewarmdog

647 posts • joined 3 Jul 2009

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Forget SETI, this is how you find aliens: Hefty prof speaks

lukewarmdog
Gates Horns

Re what life

Conveniently Zuma is in Blighty right now to push for sanctions against Zimbabwe to be lifted.

Convenient.. or a sign?

lukewarmdog

Any really intelligent lifeform

Would send a robot first.

Any self respecting robot would look at what we're doing to rescue our Mars rover.

I think we're boned if we're waiting for some kind of galactic benefit scheme to rescue us.

New use found for 'world's most useful tree'

lukewarmdog
Thumb Up

And

Visqueen doesn't grow on trees. Yet.

As well as a download, why not print out some copies of the pdf and drop them aerially across affected areas? The paper could also be made from this tree.

Climategate hits Westminster: MPs spring a surprise

lukewarmdog
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Concrete Steps for Climate Change

Surely something more bio-friendly like steps made from hemp and bamboo would be better.

Inquiries into scientific blunders shouldn't be hosted by politicians unless they have relevant scientific knowledge. Might as well just invite El Reg posters to submit questions to the panel. Or Paris.. I hear she's really intelligent underneath her normal persona.

iPad launch may be limited to US, says analyst

lukewarmdog
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re : re bottleneck

"Apple's own inspections revealed the child labour, so not exactly being caught is it?"

Yes it was exactly being caught, the manufacturers were caught using child labour. By Apple inspectors.

"it was Apple's suppliers, not Apple using the 15 year old workers."

I know.. it says so in the article "at the iPad's manufacturer, Hon Hai Precision". They were caught using child labour you know. By Apple inspectors.

Now where the hell did I put those larger chairs?

lukewarmdog
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Bottleneck

Did they need to order larger chairs since they got caught using child labour?

Wiseguys net $25m in ticket scalping racket

lukewarmdog
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Useless human beings

But kudos for making so much money out of flipping. Anyone who pays £120 for a £10 ticket deserves to be ripped off. Why are we all slagging off Coldplay? They bought tickets for Miley Cyrus. I mean seriously.. wont somebody think of the children?

Google borgs online photo editor

lukewarmdog
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Also

Request a Google icon. It should be a saintly icon that mouseovers to be an evil icon.

With a tooltip. That says "don't mention the Chinese"

Sexy is as sexy does: UK.gov struggles with sexualisation

lukewarmdog
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Over thinking

The simple solution is to stop having kids.

Then all of this goes away.

Skype first to scrap Windows Mobile

lukewarmdog
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Cost conscious consumers

The article claims that WinMo doesn't appeal to certain people because of usage costs and says buy an iPhone. Really? Did I miss the memo where they became cheap? Seems disingenuous to blame it on the handset when it's all about the contract.

Cloud Engines Pogoplug 2

lukewarmdog
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but but

If you run over to Scan (first place I looked) you can get a Buffalo NAS with 1TB drive built in for the same price. DNLA, USB, Ethernet.. am I missing the point of this device? Regardless it's hard to miss the colourscheme.. nasty.

One month later, Google still censors China search

lukewarmdog
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Once upon a time in China

When Google first exploded with righteous indignation the staff there must have thought "oh crap, we're all going to prison". Hopefully Google is working on a way to get them out before it closes any operations.

Prisoners chucked off Facebook

lukewarmdog
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Prisoners! Using! Facebook!

Someone advise Straw to close down Facebook.

He just might be stupid enough to agree to it.

Google will build 1Gbps fiber networks to the home

lukewarmdog
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cost to Google

Wasn't there an Obama incentive package to improve the networks?

Sure there was, nobody wanted it because they were all happy little ISPs with no need to upset the status quo.

Maybe Google has it's single fiery eye on that pot.

As long as it's looking there tho, it wont notice our trepid adventurer sticking a token ring adapter into Mount Dooms central distributed processing control centre and saving middle Earth.

MySQL handler Jacobs walks out on Oracle

lukewarmdog
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no dongle for old men

Mine was awesome from Manchester to London and back again on Virgin trains.

As for netbooks, mine's running XP and Microsoft Office. Compatibility issues? None here.

British poshos outdrink chavs

lukewarmdog
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Ban Beer

"Not sure if it's necessary to outlaw alcohol -- just put it on an equal footing with the rest of drugs for once."

It's on an equal footing with tobacco, gambling, glue.

Betting sites balance fraudster nab and customer loss

lukewarmdog
FAIL

World of Warcraft?

Seriously, they're moving TOWARDS a wow model? This is the same game where thousands of players keep getting scammed and duped items flood the markets? That's a step forward?

I need to get a job in gambling security stat.

Extreme pr0n suspect has his internet access suspended

lukewarmdog
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Hmm

NO INTERNET is something you'd tag onto a hackers bail conditions because it's what they used to perpertrate the alleged crime and because they could probably use it to retrospectively destroy all evidence and cancel their court appearances. It worked for Ferris Bueller so why not.

In this case whilst the images may have been down/uploaded, surely they were first photographed. Is he banned from using a camera? What about banning him from being near animals, or people with genitals and breasts.

I've no real objections to him being banned from the Internet but it seems that the law considers it like a real place when in fact it's nothing like being ASBO'd from a shopping centre.

Men at Work swiped Down Under riff

lukewarmdog
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Can't see it myself

Not the video, I can see that fine.. I just can't tell what relation the two songs bear to each other.

Facebook re-write takes PHP to an enterprise past

lukewarmdog
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Ask and ye shall receive

"Recordon said Facebook wants community feedback."

You're still shit mate.

ID minister promises virtual immortality for all Britons

lukewarmdog
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Impossible to take seriously

Sure Hitler.. scary.

Meg.. Family Guy.

Impossible.

As for data retention, let Europe sort it out before we go bankrupt(er) trying to fund the database-that-never-stops. Look at the mess we ended up with the NHS.

UK moob jobs rocket 80 per cent

lukewarmdog
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lister01

How many male boob jobs went the other way? There's a healthy transgender culture as well as those people who don't care what society thinks, the convenience factor of having your own boobs far outweighs the pointing and staring you might get down the pub. I await the Playmobil presentation with bated breath, popcorn and bottled lager.

Ladbrokes, police probe data breach

lukewarmdog
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Wut..

Ladbrokes said: "We are in the process of contacting the limited number of customers affected by this incident"

- I thought there were 4.5 million affected..

The ICO said the story showed the need for prison sentences for those convicted of trading in private data.

- No what it shows is that Ladbrokes can't secure their databases and should go to prison for this.

Government expects £277m from vetting scheme

lukewarmdog
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But what if

You work at a school for 11-16s and get this new bit of paper.

Does it then let you get in the showers with your under 11s football team?

Paedophile isn't some all encompassing buzzword and there shouldn't be one all encompassing scheme that replaces the need for seperate CRB checks.

Only nukes can stop planetsmash asteroids, say US boffins

lukewarmdog
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So about that SDI

Reagan was on the right track?

But why is there no mention of a Diamondillium shield?

UK.gov uses booze to lure London kids into ID scheme

lukewarmdog
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Shurely not

"young people are told the card will help them buy booze, cigarettes, mucky movies, travel to Europe and even open a bank account."

If you're going to lie to them, why not tell them that buying one enters you into a prize draw to win a computer, why not tell them it will help get them laid or a record deal? Why not point out the fact it's awesome for cutting up coke or maybe add a ruler and a spirit level bubble and market it to builders apprentices? Wait.. they do still have apprentice schemes right? What about colour coding them at least to make them fashionable?

Sun squeals over 'UK's first iPhone baby'

lukewarmdog
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iConceive

Should you be allowed to have babies if you a) only have sex when the calendar says so and b) can't actually figure out the calendar and have to buy a phone and install an app on it?

Will the new childs first words be "tv remote"?

'Larry and Sergey' to offload 10m Google shares

lukewarmdog
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Just think

Of all the evil you could not do with all that money.

I'm not doing any evil now but for free. I'd love to get paid for it and in return I promise to carry on not doing any evil for at least the next five years.

Oracle prez admits 8 1/2 years with billboard woman

lukewarmdog
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Hell hath etc

"[She] had them placed where family and friends lived to let people know this was a significant relationship - that she was not just a mistress."

And she cares why? I know I sure as hell don't. She had them placed in order to do the most harm, if any of it is to be believed that is. Thing is he's not exactly in the same ball park as Tiger Woods and I don't care about him either. Women eh, can't beat 'em, can't join 'em, can't even stop them taking out massive billboard ads.

China denies role in cyber attacks on Google

lukewarmdog
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Soo.

Business as usual from Google as it presumably wakes up, smells a fresh cup of coffee and decides it had better shut the hell up and carry on if it knows what's good for it?

Steve Ballmer defaces fanboi MacBook

lukewarmdog
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Thing is

Microsoft don't sell a device. If you took him a toaster running Windows he's made some money off you. So this kid bought an Apple laptop, who cares? He paid for a copy of Windows.

Amusing story to start the week.

NASA pegs Noughties as hottest decade on record

lukewarmdog
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Warm?

Coldest winter for 38 years. Cold outside right now too. Cold in the office.

So where's this warm then? Do I need to wear a coat made of burning coal?

ASA bans tyrannical German boss ad

lukewarmdog
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To the second AC

Germans reserving benches with towels isn't a humorous anecdote but hard fact. Last time we went to Tunisia one of the German familes reserved a whole section of loungers at some ungodly hour, we'd finish breakfast at 8 ish and head for the pool and they'd turn up at 11 ish.

Surely the whole point of stereotypes is to produce a recognisable character. It could just as easily have been a loud Lanchasire or Yorkshire boss. Or a Scot or Irish person. A cockney wouldn't have worked. Is there a list of what are allowed in what context?

Rickets rise linked to excessive gaming

lukewarmdog
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Wont somebody think of the

Terrible fate of Children born in Newcastles. They all grow up sounding like that.

There should be some kind of birth control never mind vitamins in the milk.

Kill two birds with one stone. You can do that in some parts of the middle east.

China swings at Clinton as Schmidt fudges exit plan

lukewarmdog
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rhetoric

Chinas response is as full of bs as ever. "Chinese people do not want freedom".. oh really?

As for Google.. they want to stay in China but not at the expense of search. Now makes even less than ever. It's fine to do *some* business with a country that runs over students with tanks?

Microsoft's top lawyer demands a cloud computing law

lukewarmdog
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Wrong angle

If anyone tries to hack a cloud, their computer electrocutes them, covers them in purple dye and implants an RFID chip in their head.

That should cut down on these sky pie hackers.

Firefox 3.6 goes live and final

lukewarmdog
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que?

"That's just ridiculous. Generally the two camps are people who buy memory because their apps demand it, and the spotty oiks who want to play Top Trumps with their mates"

My machines all came with RAM. I would like it to be used optimally to power my apps. I've never seen any spotty oiks playing Top Trumps. Do spotty oiks even have mates? Ones that can read? To reiterate.. all that memory doing NOTHING can be used to make your browser go faster. In other news pope, branch of Christianity. Bears, wood.

IFPI wants another stab at OiNK

lukewarmdog
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Doesn't

Double Jeapordy apply?

Any further attempt to get this guy back into court would surely be harrassment and wasting the courts time. Judges aren't keen on that.

Why Bono is wrong about filesharing

lukewarmdog
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Wont do what you tell me

Bono grew rich during a time when home taping was killing the music industry.

Doesn't seem to have done him any harm.

Bit tired of these elder statesmen with a vested interest telling me about what goes on on the Internet.

Google taps Gmail for more clicks with ad tweak

lukewarmdog
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Ads - no thanks

I can confidently state I have never clicked on an ad. I've never bought anything just because a big flashing box on my screen tells me to. In fact those boxes scare me, I don't trust them at all. I buy stuff all the time but I do it by shopping around my own trusted sites, not a big random flashy advert.

I have never been in the middle of reading an email and thought "Oh yes, I really do need to buy some fish fingers, must pop out and get some now". Has anyone? If it keeps my free services free then by all means push the adverts but I can't see that they really work.

As for Go Compare.. their advert is having the opposite effect to the one they want, I would actively use any service BUT theirs.

Oz man coughs to DD-jub job advert outrage

lukewarmdog
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Perhaps

They could also ask that the prospective candidate is able to write Engish properly:

"Border Express is a one of"

"the opportunity for to enhance"

Oracle power couple take Manhattan by billboard

lukewarmdog
Coat

Sorry

Skeptics feel Phillips could be apologizing for something big

- Maybe he promised her the moon 8 years ago and now he's trying to buy her off with Sun

Manchester ID staff suffer isolation as new dawn fades

lukewarmdog
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Mancunians

I'd rather imagine that if 2,000 people expressed an interest, they mostly went to get a card. I'd also suggest that those people probably work in and around local government.

Can't recall seeing any advertising for an id card in Manchester.

Apple's iPad - the tablet with the data center soul

lukewarmdog
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OK

All back to the apple forums now pls.

A giant iPhone for £500? Pass.

Israelis develop Nazi-doodlebug sonic deathwave cannon

lukewarmdog
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Dammit

Now I need to dig a bigger hole for my secret bunker.

/grumble

Google ices Android launches in China

lukewarmdog
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confused

Whilst I'm all for people sticking it to the Chinese in an effort to improve human rights and stuff, I really didn't expect Google to be the one to do it.

What is really going on?

MS spins IE security disaster into Windows 7 upgrade opportunity

lukewarmdog
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Damage Limitation

"there are a number of ways to limit the attack to an IE crash"

Chrome, Firefox, Opera..

Ballmer: no China exit for Microsoft's Bing

lukewarmdog

Lol

Microsoft in admits-we-get-hacked-all-the-time-and-nobody-bothers shock.

Health Net's missing drive could cost it millions

lukewarmdog
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Software

Health Net said the data could only be viewed with specific software, but unfortunately that software was commonly available.

so that's Adobe Reader then.

Discrimination warning over airport body scanners

lukewarmdog
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@Valerion

The perfect family is actually also the best target for extremists to try and recruit.

How soon before the perfect son is strapping the bomb on?

There's a whole world of home grown terror out there.

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