* Posts by eJ2095

392 publicly visible posts • joined 30 Jun 2009

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BOFH: WELCOME TO COLOSSAL SERVER ROOM ADVENTURE!!

eJ2095

Should have gone into "Die Hard" mode

It's Pi day: Care to stuff a brand new Raspberry one in your wallet?

eJ2095

Must have missed it

There is no "Will it run Crysis"........

It gets worse: Microsoft’s Spectre-fixer wrecks some AMD PCs

eJ2095

Explains why

When i reinstalled 10 back ont neighbours PC after the hardrive had failed it ran an update and got stuck on the windows logo....

yup athlon 64.

But it did repair it self so alls good for now

SuperFish cram scandal: Lenovo must now ask nicely before stuffing new PCs with crapware

eJ2095

Re: Removing all crapware

Nortan and Mcaffee gone as well :-0

No, BMW, petrol-engined cars don't 'give back to the environment'

eJ2095

Re: Seeing as it's a BMW,...

And not having to brake at red lights as they just change over

Mozilla and Yahoo! trade sueballs over Firefox-Google search deal

eJ2095

Yahoo

They still around....

Looking for scrubs? Nah, NHS wants white hats – the infosec techie kind

eJ2095

Here comes the Crapita

They will issue staff with tin foil hats and charge the full 20 million

Boss made dirt list of minions' mistakes, kept his own rampage off it

eJ2095

The GFX Card removed

Did not take place at work, was for me friends brothers back in 2000s he was 15 at the time.

Was explaining over MSN messagner how to remove gfx card to put another one in

Then all of a sudden he vanished off line.

then got a phone call saying his computer had gone off..

Yup you can guess what happened there.. Did make me laugh, luckily it all still worked afterwards

UK lotto players quids in: Website knocked offline by DDoS attack

eJ2095

Prolly the uk govermemnt buying tickets as they need to grow the magic money tree

Sysadmin tells user CSI-style password guessing never w– wait WTF?! It's 'PASSWORD1'!

eJ2095

Bit late i know

We normally get the users laptop passwords / bitlocker keys cellotaped to the laptop..

We then have to tell them not to do this and why but goes in one ear out the other

Bill Gates says he'd do CTRL-ALT-DEL with one key if given the chance to go back through time

eJ2095

1/2% Crap in the uk if you work for goverment thats higher then the yearly pay rise!

Don't gripe if you hand your PC to Geek Squad and they rat you out to the Feds – judge

eJ2095

just a thought

Whats to stop them dropping an image on the drive etc etc (if they are worth there salt make it come from an earlier point in time)

then claim the bounty?

User thanked IT department for fast new server, but it had never left its box

eJ2095

Like to play swap out

We got a load of HP laptops all indentical which run Igel client configured for Citrix use.

We get the odd call to say its running slow when they log on etc (Just normally reset the citrix profile as nowt special saved in it)

But always get the odd person who wont have it so we keep a couple of spares and just swap the laptop out for a spare one and put the swopped one back out in stocl untill the next call and swop again.

We dont even bother to boot the things up when swopped as there is really no point..

its the illusion you have done something that pays off

We'll deliver 'in a few weeks' says troubled ZX Spectrum reboot firm

eJ2095

wonder if "Crapita" are a hidden investor lol

Ubuntu Linux now on Windows Store (for Insiders)

eJ2095

Wait for it....

Going to be Lindows next (Yes i know it existed ages ago and microsft moaned about it)

But this will be the new and improved microsoft approved version........ God help us all

Got a Windows Phone 8 mobe? It's now officially obsolete. Here's why...

eJ2095

Time to wheel out my old 3210.....

OMG, dad, you're so embarrassing! Are you P2P file sharing again?

eJ2095

Soo

Its not cool to use my Napster (Before Metalica killed it) version....

So given i was 19 in 1999 now 18 years on.. Crap am middle aged doh

Virgin Media biz service goes TITSUP* across London

eJ2095

Yup there still is..

On the side of a curved main road as well..

One good crash and yup you guessed it

Virgin Media admits it 'fell short' in broadband speeds ahead of lashing from BBC's Watchdog

eJ2095

VM

The trick is dont sleep and you get your full bandwidth.......at 3am

eJ2095

Re: It's coming!

Try ublock origin much better then adblockplus

Brit teen accused of running malware factory and helpdesk for crims

eJ2095

Yay Uk Justice....

Oh wait....

Computer misuse crimes carry more of a sentence then murder in the uk....

Virgin Media cuts 250 jobs amid £3bn Project Lightning cockup fallout

eJ2095

Well Perhaps

If they stop hiking up there prices.

Come up with a better pricing system.. (I don’t want your sodding land line or TiVo)

Deliver the speeds they promise.

And sort out them dreadful super duds

Humanity is doomed: We watch 45 BILLION hours of YouTube a month

eJ2095

In all Fairness

TV in the uk is crap.

You get the odd decent program and thats about it.

I do watch youtube but its normally background noise on tv. such as the WatchMojo etc

EVblog fun to watch, Tear down Vids usefull etc etc

Latest Windows 10 Insider build pulls the trigger on crappy SMB1

eJ2095

Whats this Edge you speak of

Oh hang on i know..

Used to download the browser of your choice (Then Windows gets into a fight with you about it being set as the default browser)

Microsoft admits to disabling third-party antivirus code if Win 10 doesn't like it

eJ2095

Sod it

time to dust off my old Amiga

Brit hacker admits he siphoned info from US military satellite network

eJ2095

I Wonder

Why he did it from his home internet??

If he had the intellgince to borrow said usernames etc surley had the sense to not use his own isp..

Hell i would not even use my own laptop

Fighter pilot shot down laptops with a flick of his copper-plated wrist

eJ2095

Ashes to Ashes

About 3 years had a call from local Crem to report PC kept shutting down near the Crem machine where the bodies go.

So sent across one of the minions to go take a look and he bought it back to site as indeed was over heating.

So the poor lad takes this apart and its full of (I kid you not) white soot.

So he happily goes on with clean it out etc.. untill i explain to him what the soot could possiably be...

Image that your last resting place wedged in the back of an HP DC5750.....

Voyager 1 passes another milestone: It's now 138AU from home

eJ2095

Wonder When

Kirk bumps into it.....

Virgin Media resolves flaw in config backup for Super Hub routers

eJ2095

Virgin

Shame they can not sort out there over subsribed network.

On the plus side mines sat in modem mode.. Shame they dont do a small box version for people who use there own routers :0 (DD-WRT)

Science megablast: Comets may have brought xenon to Earth

eJ2095

Re: Oh thanks, now I'll have bloody Bomb the Bass stuck in my head all day!

Lol beat me to it..

Amiga version i hope!

UK PM May's response to London terror attack: Time to 'regulate' internet companies

eJ2095

V For Vendetta

Give it 20 years and will be just like the film!!!

PC repair chap lets tech support scammer log on to his PC. His Linux PC

eJ2095

i like this game

Me and my friends have the who can keep them on the phone the longest

Beeb hands £560m IT deal to Atos. Again

eJ2095

ATOS..?

Same dudes that do the PIP...

What could possibly go wrong

BOFH: The Boss, the floppy and the work 'experience'

eJ2095

Re: Being on a placement myself...

Very very true....

Might bring in a xbox for the next one

I need an ISP that offers IPv6. Virgin Media: Whatevs, nerd

eJ2095

Ahh teh 3 month review

I get a refund every 3 months off them for there sloowwww service

Nintendo Switch orders delayed: Dun dun dun... dundundun dundundun dadada!

eJ2095

Well

i just wondered over to smyths toys and bought it

Boffins explain why it takes your Wi-Fi so long to connect

eJ2095

Suppose its better

Then apples you are holding it wrong line....

Windows 10 Anniversary Update crushed exploits without need of patches

eJ2095

Ha i see

They rebadged the mega patch to anniversary..

is this just not a service pack....

Sod it switching back to 0s2....

Plusnet? More like Plus-naught: Mobile data on the fritz for days for some unlucky punters

eJ2095

Lifemobile

I had a lifemobile 3g sim.

They launched teh offer for 10 quid so signed up.

Got sent a new plusnet sim to replace old one.

Had no 4g data for 2 weeks.

Rang up again to be told i would have to be sent another 3g life mobile activate that sim then stick in another 4g sim and activate that and all was well..

What a game though

User needed 40-minute lesson in turning it off and turning it on again

eJ2095

It should be the pop up edition

Virgin Media users report ongoing problems delivering legit emails. Again

eJ2095

It Could just be

The hop to GCHQ keeps playing up ......

Windows 10 Anniversary Update crashing under Avast antivirus update

eJ2095

Ahh yess

We don't like you using classic shell so we have removed it for you...

Which i thought was nice.....

What next.... we see you have lots of porn and we have removed it for you....(Thats stored on the 02 USB stick now)

Swap out Hal for Cortana :- http://www.imdb.com/character/ch0002900/quotes

Brit network O2 hands out free Windows virus with USB pens

eJ2095

Re: Windows Vista?

How would you tell if Vista had a virus.........

I thought it was the virus ;-0

Argos changes 150 easily guessed drop-off system passwords

eJ2095

This sprang to mind

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a6iW-8xPw3k

O2 sales dip 9% as tight-fisted Brits cling to their old handsets

eJ2095

Well

I don't really need a new device every 2 years that does the same as the old device...

Soon we will all be getting 3-4 year contracts....

I don't like Mondays, Pokemon, Twitter or Facebook – Sir Bob Geldof

eJ2095

This mean

We get a nokia 3100 ring tone of "Feed the world"?

Free Windows 10 upgrade: Time is running out – should you do it?

eJ2095

Re: Seriously WTF?

Ahh Good old Dopus... :-0

eJ2095

I wonder

Am i right in thinking if you have a dodgy version of win 7 ultimate this will free upgrade to win 10 pro....

Only wonder as my new lappy has win 10 home and could in theory wipe clean install win 7 ultimate and up to 10 pro??

But as it is microshaft will get shafted some where along the way...

Seagate in 10TB drive brand brainstorm

eJ2095

So when the drive goes tits up Seagate support can advise your data floated away.....

Or is the Helium the next step to help you to the cloud...... ;-0

UK councils refuse to push data into the cloud

eJ2095

And in Sandwell

We have moved over to office 365 and the cloud wonders off at least twice a week

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