Posts by Phil 54

Full-body scanner blind to bomb parts

I beg to differ...

You can light a strip of magnesium with a standard bic lighter, and if the magnsesium is in powder or granular form, with a match. I speak from experience (non-terrorist related). Magnesium is sometimes used in backpacking survival kits because you can use it to light a fire in even the worst conditions.

In-depth probe fails to hit the G-spot

I knew it!

although I did once date a squirter... am i allowed to say that?

Redkneck Vampire Attacks Trailer Park

My favourite headline:

"Lady Gives Birth to Six-foot Green Martian Baby"

I was looking for the Weekly World News on a recent trip to Canada; now I know why I couldn't find it.

High-speed Chinese train kicks French, Japanese butt

also with cheap chinese labour

We did the same thing in Canada

IBM's cat-brain sim a 'scam,' says Swiss boffin

Basically...

10 Meow

20 Eat

30 Scratch furniture

40 goto 10

Religious discrimination law may open door for decent deviants

Trudeau said it best

“The state has no business in the bedrooms of the nation.”

Pierre Elliot Trudeau

MS plasters Ballmer's signature on Windows 7 special edition

No balloons in France

I got my Windows 7 party box yesterday, but NO BALLOONS!!!!!!

Just to be clear, I don't (and never had) have any intentions of actually hosting a Windows 7 party. I will probably get pissed with some friends on the date that I specified, but there's a 5/7 chance of that anyways!!!!

Interesting sidenote: According to the courier, there are about thirty people that are "hosting" Windows 7 parties here in Nantes. Nantes has a population of about 300000. Therefore, Microsoft must be giving away almost 7 million free copies of Windows 7 worldwide!!!!

How to host your very own Windows 7 launch party

we're taking the piss

Richard, you don't seem to understand that nobody here intends to host a real Windows 7 party. It's called "taking the piss".

By the way, I just got an email from DHL and my free copy of Windows 7 just left Cincinnati.

You're all invited

I filled out the form, and got picked to host a Windows 7 party here in France.

You're all invited.

I have to admit, I was picturing more of a 'this is ridiculous, let's get pissed" bash, but maybe I'll take Microsoft's advice and HAVE A CRAP PARTY!!!

Seriously, I did actually get picked, I'll update here (if they don't close the comments) to detail all the fun party favours Bill's sending me.

Orange gets UK iPhone deal

poor bastards

I pity the fool who signs up with Orange, at least if Orange UK is as crap as Orange here in France

Apple Store pillaged in 31 seconds

Hilfiger

Apple is clearly using the Tommy Hilfiger school of marketing: make it easy to steal so that the inner-city steals and uses it, which makes it cool, which makes the suburbs pay more to have it.

It turned a mediocre polo-like clothing company into must-have hiphop gear!

US music publishers sue online lyrics sites

@ Glen 9

I think it would be rather more than a "small" fortune!

-checking pockets for spare change

Government rubbishes ID card hack report

@ AC 12:44

Nobody even checked BEFORE chip & pin...

me:going to the offie;

flatmate: pick me up a pack of cigarettes, here's my card;

clerk(after I pay with two different cards, signing two different names): Thank you, come again

Pocket Universe 1.7

spelling?

Betelgeuse is spelled incorrectly on the screen shot

Vulture Central plans Brit-Yank dictionary

@ Jimmy Floyd and @Steve Dulieu

Thanks to www.future-perfect.co.uk

License

This is the verb ‘to license’.

Examples:

* I license this pub.

* You are licensed to run this pub.

* The officer licenses the taxis here.

Licence

This is the noun ‘a licence’.

Examples:

* I have a driving licence.

* She wants to buy a licence for her car.

And Steve? "Gurkin" is spelled gherkin

Unfortunately, living in France is slowly destroying my native language: jogging = the clothes you wear while running, footing(???!): a form of running or trotting.

Scientists print out super-slim battery

@ Stu

I make it about 6.5 siriometers, which make the size more impressive than the battery itself

L'Oreal appeals eBay ruling

coke and cigarettes

Ah, I remember my daily trip to the shop to buy cigarettes from Ghana and Coke from Serbia

Pint because at least the beer was british

Spanish bar invites customer abuse

Colombian

My favorite is my colombian friends calling each other gonorrhea, as in

"eh! gonorrhea! dame una puta cerveza, huevon!!"

because it burns(so I hear)