* Posts by Muckminded

239 publicly visible posts • joined 17 Jun 2009


Audacity users stick the knife – and fork – in to strip audio editor of unwanted features


Some Auptions

Tuning Fork

Super Happy Audio Tinkerer



Space Audity

The Last Strawdacity

No yoke: 'Bored' Aussie test pilot passes time in the cockpit by drawing massive knobs in the air


Sounds scary, having a pilot dicking around in the cockpit.

Slack to fend off the collaboration competition with... a new logo



Looks like a rainbow in a blender.

Time to ditch the Facebook login: If customers' data should be protected, why hand it over to Zuckerberg?


Re: Matt Asay is Head of Developer Ecosystem at Adobe.

That, and this:


We are really against others doing what we would like to be doing ourselves.

Amazon files patent for 'Death Star' flying warehouse


The drones should be made to loiter and collect trash cubes made by the Wall-E ground bots while they're at it.

LeEco – the Chinese biz that said it'll topple US tech giants – has already hit the rocks


Hello Goodbye

I guess LeEco will be the sound you hear in the hallways at their headquarters when the other shoe drops. Maybe their focus on "technology" was too broad for an upstart company.

AI boffins turn to StarCraft to train future neural networks


Give the machines arthritis

As long as the machines also have to operate meaty appendages that are using crude input devices to control the far flung units and buildings, then it might actually be a fair fight. If they get to plug straight into the game without any encumbrances then they're just poor sportsbots.

I've arrived on Mars. Argggh, my back!


Extremely fascinating

that there is a journal named "Spine".

Top smut site stops Flashing, adopts HTML5


Flash gets cock-up blocked

Twenty years of letting script kiddies get in the back door is finally coming to a close.

Intel's smartwatches are so hot right now – too hot: Basis Peak recalled for skin burns, blistering


It's sad to see a watch I never knew existed suddenly become more non-existant.

Mozilla's Flash-killer 'Shumway' appears in Firefox nightlies


Re: So which is it?

"There must be Shumway out of here," said the joker to the thief.

Big Brother in SPAACE: Mars One picks first 100 morons to suffocate, er, settle on Red Planet


In space, no one can hear you say "cut"

Sounds like a very expensive way to dispose of a few idiots. Must be cheaper ways of winning Darwin awards.

FCC sexes up, er, sextuples 'broadband' speed to 25Mbps in US


Re: What a colossal waste of time.

Current FCC man is THE cable guy: http://www.fcc.gov/leadership/tom-wheeler

The US ranks 11th in the world for internet download speed. Maybe he's just trying to keep us from becoming a tech backwater?

One wonders if you have internet access at all.

Hey, America. Canada's watchdog just slapped net neutrality rules on wireless internet


Re: 5 Hours of North American TV

Sorry, we can only export the shitcoms due to international treaties and such.

The new Falcon Heavy: MOST POWERFUL ROCKET since the Apollo moonshots


Re: What is it with these people

Space Jam ftw!

Power, patriotism, paranoia and envy wrestle for attention in Foxcatcher



Gimme a hug. There ya go. Feeling any better?

Keep your court orders to YOURSELF – human rights chief slaps US


Re: Gottalottaballs here...

"Yesh I've been reading this since 1997 and the comments get less technical everyday. Before you type engage your brian."

Actually, comments on The Reg are among the few that (usually) get intelligent critiques instead of mere trollbait vitriol. Unless we're talking Microsoft, Apple, Google, and, oh nevermind.

Apple blats WireLurker OS X, iOS malware – but fanbois aren't safe yet


Hell must be cooling off

The most confusing part of this article is this: "Apple told The Reg..."

NASDAQ IT security spend: $1bn. Finding mystery malware on its servers: Priceless


May as well save the $1 billion

for the inevitable lawsuits, if it's not going to be spent on actual security.

Clingy fondleslab owners TORPEDO industry forecasts



When the predictions people are stumped by simple human behavior, then they are getting paid for nothing, just latching onto trends after the fact. Fortunately, I predict that most of them will retire within the next 40 years.

Snowden never blew a whistle, US spy boss claims


Dang, lemme look on the OTHER hard drive

OK, yeah, here are those emails.

Cheap NSA shot out of the way, why didn't Snowden preserve copies of the email threads for himself (not that they couldn't have been fabricated), so that he could produce them at times like this?

Boffin benchmark battle after D-Wave quantum kit crawls in test


So, the cat is alive

it just doesn't run any faster than any of the cats outside the box.



Which Justin Bieber video were they wanting

to view in 2,117,004 AD? We have quite a few, and none of them are informative.

GAH: Now it's INSTAGRAM and Windows Phone 8


Fewer choices = worse

Pretending that having fewer apps available is an OK thing reminds me of using a Mac in the 1990's, when nearly everything appeared on Windows first, and on Macs a few years later, or never. It was not enjoyable.

If WP market share remains in the single digits, the bulk of the apps, whether treasures or turds, will never get ported. For business users, the good news is MS will undoubtedly make the WP Office apps more polished than the versions for the other two platforms. Plus, there will likely be some form of emulator (maybe there is already), like BlueStacks for WP that will allow Android apps to run directly (as BlackBerry now does). Also, MS isn't going to just walk away from WP. Maybe. Then again, with all the weeping and wailing, maybe their fragile emotional states aren't to be trusted.

Apple pulls VPN app, helps censors' job in China


Can't saw off

the legs of the stool you're standing on. Without Chinese manufacturing, Apple would have to shop around to, like, the Philippines, or worse, Texas.

Java updates too much of a bother? Maybe online banking's just not for you


Headline v2.0

Maybe online banking with banks that require Java is just not for you

Microsoft to unveil new Surface slabs at September 23 event


Most train wrecks

aren't by invitation only, so kudos to them.

'First' 3D-printed rifle's barrel splits after single shot


Re: One up the spout!

"Even many native speakers of English do not understand the correct use of..."

Living in the US, that sentence could have ended with any number of other items the nativists don't understand.

Lasers to carry 622 Mbps Earth-Moon link



The NSA will manage to weasel into this.

T-Rex tooth find shows dino may have been a pussy


Tooth Fairy Law

dictates that the reward must be given to the current owner, and may only be conferred to another upon the current owner's consent. Therefore, the unnamed hadrosaur must be awarded the gold dubloon beneath its 65-million year old pillow, as well as a reasonable scattering of pixy dust, at the discretion of the court-appointed hob, yet to be determined.

Human error blamed for toxic Russian rocket explosion


Re: Typical Management.

Maybe if management were part of the payload, the work would improve.

Look, can we just forget about Snowden for sec... US-China cyber talks held


Strange Math

Huge electronic vacuum cleaner for the internet: $4 billion a year (funded with help by the Chinese)

Undermining trust in your own nation's companies: Priceless

Jiggy Pennsylvania couple busted by 25 bike cops


When only one cop shows up it's chance. Multiply it by 25 and it means the universe itself is trying to prevent a rip in the continuum.

Ex-Microsoft man plans brand of consumer marijuana 'fine cigars'


Jackie Paper says hi

Loves the reference.

Kettle 'which looks like HITLER' brews up sturm in a teacup


Re: People are stupid as a hole.

10 minutes until all the plastic bits melt onto the burner. There will be no thousand-year tea brewed with this shoddy imposter.

Wonder substance pulses QUADRILLION lasers per second


For this, I'm going to like carbon on Facebook

And hope it gets a few more followers on Twitter.

Now that's social.

Better Place electric car outfit goes titsup


SAP + inspired =

Satire, built right in.

US Senator introduces 'Patent Abuse Reduction Act'


Re: A step in the right direction

Real substantial reform is always more difficult than nibbling at the edges.

Adobe's Creative Cloud fails at being a cloud


Forecast: Creative Cloudiness

Somewhere in the sprawl of XML and excrement, a purpose wanders helpless as a little bitty sheep.

Oracle updates Java versioning to allow more security fixes


No wonder their browser plug-in is like an open sewer grate

if something as simple as version numbers so easily overheats their gigantic brains.

Government admits seizing two months of AP phone records


Welcome the dread spawn of the Patriot Act

I feel them reading as I type (yes, I'm either that self-important, or that aware that all wires lead to an NSA server somewhere). It's akin to having a little cockroach-like buddy on my shoulder who claims he is making things cleaner, instead of more disgusting. So, yeah, the AP thing is completely similar, except not at all. Anyway, got some typing in.

Adobe kills Creative Suite – all future features online only


Makes me SaaD

As in Software as a Disservice.

Oracle trowels more plaster over flawed Java browser plugin


Too bad hackers don't know to stick to Oracle's patch schedule. That's just rude.

Strategic SIEGE ROBOTS defeated by 'heavily intoxicated' man, 62


Machines as dull

as their operators will never match the chaotic paranoia that a fine bender produces.

US insurer punts 'bestiality' to wide-eyed kiddies, gasp 'mums'


I want a turn at that

when she is done.

Sony lifts skirt on Firefox OS with developer ROM for Xperia E


Re: It's experimental, fergossakes...

Market potential: -1

Not only will it go nowhere, it distracts Firefox from useful endeavors.

Oracle wants another go at Google over Android Java copyrights


Get back to not fixing security holes

in your precious copyrighted code.

Microsoft RTMs final Windows 8 and Server 2012 code


Re: So, what next after windows 9 ?

Windows, nein.

IT departments are BRATTY TEENAGERS


Alas, there will be no bias here

as we are all on the same page.

iPhone 5 poised to trounce Android, devastate BlackBerry?


Re: If this is bad news for RIM then what about MicroNokia?

Microsoft will subsidise and paint happy rainbows on the losses until they get 15% penetration, then claim victory. Oh, hey Bing, what up?