Posts by Ally J

Police reject Labour MP's call for Bristol-wide DNA test

Far be it from me to throw stones, but....

Ms McArthy has form for making mistakes. She claimed 'by accident' for a second bed in her one-bed flat - although she did repay the money during the expenses revelations. She is also the lucky recipient of a police caution for breaches of electoral law by revealing postal vote results too early.

So she's not really the kind of person I'd see as being capable of forming a sensible plan.

Of course, for the 'New Labour' fetish of gathering information on every citizen, this idea is a winner.

Paris, because of her involvement in publicised DNA collection events.

Google battles Derby cops over access to Street View data

"What a waste of public money that would be..."

You just have to love love love this excuse for attempting to get round the law. Maybe the person who stole the caravan can return it and use this line as an excuse to evade trial and/or imprisonment.

"Look, they've got their caravan back, I've said I'm sorry, and we're quits. What a waste of public money a trial would be."

Called 999 recently? They've got your number

What AC at 10:29 said....

If Plod stores this information, why don't they use it properly? If someone is repeatedly calling the police because of problems, why do the forces concerned seem to know nothing when it all subsequently goes wrong?

I'm very concerned about this idea that the information may be used against you, though.

"I'm surprised you're not being helpful, sir. Our records show you're normally great assistance to the police...." and so on.

Civil servants touted ID cards to friends, family as flop loomed

Politically neutral?

Is what I thought civil servants are meant to be. Surely encouraging them to sign up their friends and family to the ID card scheme sails very, very close to affecting that neutrality?

Labour moots using speed cameras to reward law-abiding drivers

Aaargh! Fnckwits!

They truly have no idea, do they? Stick all the names in a hat and there's a chance you could win a prize? This from a party who managed to create so many new crimes there's probably as much of a chance for you to get nicked for something as there would be to win a prize. So stupid it hurts to even think about it.

National Identity Card holding chumps have buyer's remorse

My heart bleeds

The people who bought into this knew they were buying into something deeply unpopular with a significant portion of the public, and unlikely to be supported when there was a change of government. They paid the princely (and probably heavily subsidised) price of £30 to be faintly controversial, and now they want that £30 back?

These chancers should apply for a refund to Labour Party. They championed this silliness, and can raise the funds by, say, flogging off a peerage or two.

BAA accused of banning passengers from filming travel chaos

Not the best message

It's private property and BAA can probably impose any rules they wish, backed up by 'national security' if they so desire. It doesn't endear them to anyone if their staff are clamping down on people taking pictures of what their holiday has become.

Disability rights activist chains self to tax office desk

"Efficiency savings"...

mean that this sort of thing is only going to get more common. I'm most impressed Ms Lewis was able to get inside a tax office to act - so many government bodies are now retreating into offices that the public are positively discouraged from finding. On the other side, the petty procedures and regulations imposed on the staff mean that none of them has the remotest authority to act without getting it approved by several tiers of management.

Don't be too hard on the lower levels. In order to skill them down and so pay them less, they are very likely to have a set of rules they simply can't step away from for fear of disciplinary action. Thus we have the stupidity of not being able to act until a set letter has been sent out, but not being able to send that letter out outside of a rigid priority system.

And, of course, there will be no apology. HMRC doesn't do that.

Piracy threats lawyer mocks 4chan DDoS attack

In fairness....

I don't have any sympathy for iffy lawyers, but taking their website down isn't going to do much to 'hurt' them, is it? I can understand the BPI, MIAA and RIAA will hurt a little if their websites go down, but these people will just see it as a triumph: "We are *so* good at rounding up ruffians on the internet that they attack us all the time".

Devil manifests in Hungarian bathroom

It's not Old Nick

It's an upside-down picture of Darth Vader.

FSFE calls on governments to stop pushing Adobe Reader

I blame the government!

Or, more seriously, the slow-moving tribe of clowns who judge what's fit to use on government systems and what isn't. The apparatchiks producing the PDFs are having to work from a relatively small pool of approved software, one of which is Adobe's PDF reader. They probably don't feel confident recommending something else which they haven't used, and won't be able to use without requesting permission in a series of interminable memos. (I know of what I speak, sad to say.)

If a-n-other.gov.uk's website recommends a PDF reader which doesn't work, there'll be howls of outrage from everyone at what a load of numbskulls they are. So rather than face the hootis of derision, they stick with what they know, which is what the clowns above them have judged to be 'safe'.

Cut out and keep this rant for when the press release comes out about government web sites not working with non-IE browsers.

Voice of America chap ejaculates over Paris Hilton

"significant American thought"

Just beautiful. I have been snorting and snuffling with repressed giggling at this article - a great mix of unintentional irony and traditional smut.

Poke them again, go on. I want to hear them talk about Ms Hilton some more.

Phone bugging scandal reignited as NotW suspends reporter

The Mighty Murdoch

It's most illuminating that one of the Scotland Yard press people is quoted as saying it would be bad to get on the wrong side of Murdoch's media.

Assange denies 'sexual assault' allegations

But who benefits from this?

Much as I love the idea of some very daft CIA spook orgainising a rubbish story and then realising no-one will believe it, I can't imagine anyone being *that* stupid. All this story has done is make Assange more of a martyr and add to his reputation as a fearless champion of the truth despite the efforts of 'the Man' to silence him.

My (very cynical) money is on this being a black propaganda exercise by the pro-Assange camp.

CEOP claims success for Facebook 'panic button'

In a few months, this will all be forgotten

and Jim will have to find some other crisis to raise his profile/justify his existence.

Police told terror ads too terrifying offensive

We paid for this....

We lucky taxpayers fund ACPO, and they are funding in their turn the creation of this ad. (And the broadcast slot, which probably wasn't cheap.)

(Paris because we haven't seen her much, and she does stuff behind closed curtains.)

Leicester Council's iPad can chair meetings

what a crock....

"he was able to chair a major council meeting just by using his iPad"

Absolute meaningless bow-locks. He may very well have had all the relevant documentation transferred to his iPad, but the implication that this somehow 'enabled' the councillor in question to chair the meeting is tosh.

I've chaired 'major council meetings'. Depending on the meeting, you need to look at lots of paperwork. I can see how a connected-up iPad would be useful at, say, a planning meeting, or any situation where a quick answer is required that can be sourced from the intra/internet. But then so could a laptop/netbook/smartphone/tech-savvy intern.

I'm dying to know just how the iPad was able to provide something more to enable chairing this meeting than any of the choices I've suggested.

Really, this is meaningless.

Academics challenge moral consensus on sex and the net

'feminists'

In fairness, not all feminists are anti-porn. The trouble is that the ones who are then denounce the others as being traitors of some variety. Please don't tar all feminists with an abolitionist brush.

Feed curry to sheep, boffins suggest

On a more serious note

While I can't stand coriander (ghastly stuff) I do recall that it grows very well in the UK. Admittedly, my experience is based on a herb garden in the heart of Metroland, so I don't know if the stuff will grow just as well in the more northerly sheep-farming areas. Or if sheep will actually eat the stuff.

But.... if it does work we may have a cheap(ish) method of reducing emmissions.

Now back to the fart jokes.

London hospital hosted grumble flick shoot

It's not uncommon....

A lot of NHS places hire out their buildings for use by film crews. If the government are going to expect decisions on whether to hire out to be made on the quality or subject of the film being made, we may be doomed. For example, I was disappointed with '28 Days Later'. Should I write to an appropriate MP and express my concern that an NHS Trust got money by hiring out one of its wards for the film?

eBay shill bidder gets £5,000 fine

What about the minibus?

Do we know if that turned out to have been clocked?

Poor lad does seem to have been slightly lacking in criminal cunning if all three logins shared the same contact details. You have to wonder if the (alleged) clocking attempt was just as inept....

Facebook rejects CEOP 'panic button' demands (again)

A Facebook group

...saying 'Fnck off Jim Gambles' would probably be too subtle an irony for the humourless knob.

Shame.

UKIP suspends Scouse candidate over sado smut movies

Fascinating

The Lib Dems seemed to have weathered the storm (such as it was) of Anna Span being a parliamentary candidate, so UKIP lacking the courage to back an 'alternative sexuality' candidate is a disappointment.

Can't say that putting a party political message in the end credits is a bright idea, but then who watches the end credits of 'films like that' anyway?

Met launches net café spy operation

Isn't there a serious Data Protection issue here?

If cafe owners are going to be snooping through your data, shouldn't they therefore be displaying this very clearly somewhere so as not to fall foul of other laws? And leaving security up to the subjective judgement of an untrained proprietor is, as has already been mentioned, a recipe for disaster.

It's a delightful irony that this 'initiative' arrives on the day that one of Parliament's own committees is saying the Government is overdoing the security measures.

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/uk_politics/8583643.stm

Man could face prison over six second 'extreme porn' clip

Stu 3 has got it right....

Plod having spent so much money on arresting this bloke and then searching through his computer, they need to show a scalp for it.

Something very similar happened back in the day with Operation Spanner, where Plod was told they'd find a 'snuff' movie, and instead found some middle-aged gay men doing bad things to each other. The fact that all of the participants had consented counted for nothing in the courts.

Of course, the world is now a safer place.

Facebook stands up to UK.gov's cyberbullying

Yay for knee-jerk legislation

You know it's coming - any social networking site will be obliged by law to have panic buttons, and their very presence will be 'proof' that the internet is a dangerous place.

Cue 'good' censorship of the web (like Australia has) rather than 'bad' censorship (like China has) because it's in our own best interests.

I'm afraid it's very likely to happen as none of the parties likely to be anywhere near power come May have the requisite balls to say 'wait a minute'....

Female porn director turned pol grabs Kent by the ballots

Wonderful news

As 'Anna Span', she's even been on "Woman's Hour" talking about her work, so she's almost 'respectable' already. Fair play to the Lib Dems for being brave enough to let her stand, although I have a nagging doubt about whether they'd have let her stand if they thought they had a chance of winning.

Austrian army cans Benny Hill recruitment ad

How....

... was the stubbly guy going to fit all four girls into his car anyway? He hadn't thought that through, had he?

Aussie man convicted for Simpsons smut

"Rule 34" is now a crime

Seriously, you couldn't make it up. But for the fact that someone's life has been ruined, this would be hilarious.

Solicitor General takes fresh pop at PunterNet

Daft, but not surprising

The trouble is that an issue like sex work is (to use a terrible cliche) low-hanging fruit for politicians. They can easily say 'We are against this', get the Daily Mail on their side, and not really have to think about much.

It would require a lot more intelligence and hard work so work out a 'solution' to trafficking that is more likely to work. Strangely enough, it's the 'oppressed and exploited' women in groups like IUSW and ECP who are managing to do this, while the politicos just mutter.

UK BitTorrent admin acquitted on fraud charge

Watch the news....

Anyone care to bet how long it takes for Messrs Bono, Sharkey, et. al. to start asking for non-jury trials in cases like this 'as the facts were clearly too complex' for the simple jurors to grasp?

Why Nominet disconnected 1,000 sites with no court oversight

Not a good sign, to be honest

Bent sites or not, the idea of Nominet taking down sites because a policeman says they're illegal is a bit iffy.

The only way to test this opinion appears to be to complain, and only 10% of the complainants get their domains back.

And the Met are hardly a shining example of 'getting it right' in all cases.

ACPO proposes new domestic violence database

Very bad idea

When I was a local councillor, many years ago, we had a glorious case of malicious allegations of domestic violence. To cut a very long story short, the council ran up huge legal bills trying to evict someone on the strength of an unfounded allegation.

Bring something like this into 'force' and that sorry tale will be repeated everywhere. Let's at least have some vestige of proof involved....

Judge Dredd 'Black Box' recorder/spy kit for guns unveiled

It wasn't just in the movie

As I recall (although it was a long time ago), Dredd was fitted up in the comics, too. I'm sorry to say I gave up reading it about 15 years ago, so don't know if there have been subsequent attempts to frame him.

(Mine's the coat with 'Chopper is a joob!' on the back.)

Kiwis slap 'vacant' sign on Paris Hilton

Yay for the Streisand effect!

Now we all get to see it. Of course, it's interesting that they're not claiming any sort of defamation, just that an image has been used without consent.

I would have enjoyed a lawsuit with Paris trying to claim she isn't 'vacant'.

Tories will scrap 'pre-crime' vetting

Can we get a list of banned materials?

As many have already pointed out, this is gloriously Stalinesque. What's the view on '1984'?

Watford council punts parents from playground

This sounds like mischief making to me....

Watford's a three-way marginal seat - one of the few where the Lib Dems have consistently come second. This looks like a good way to churn up feeling against them in the run-up to May next year. "Watford's Lib-Dem run council has made Watford into a national laughing stock - can you imagine what a Lib-DEM MP would do?" and so on.

Virginia corrections officers on 'dog fondling' rap

Perhaps an urban legend, but....

(No, not *that* urban legend.) A law enforcement officer I know (I shall be no more specific) assured me that w*nking off the dog was a way of establishing dominance and ensuring the animal behaved itself. (He wasn't a dog handler himself. Ahem.)

That said, it may be a practice that police officers do, but prefer not to be filmed doing. Like smacking protestors.

Paris, for the inevitable dog/masturbation/filming jokes.

Guardian in hot water over activist face flash

Guardian's in the right on this one, I think

This is no 'worse' than having your photo in the paper after you attended a demo. What the Guardian have exposed is that Plod have their own little lists of people to look for. Had the Guardian just said so, no-one would have believed them. Now we know that even Mark Thomas is on their list. It's very worrying that these documents are being produced and therefore damning anyone on them to being branded a troublemaker before the event begins.

Of course, now Plod has to display his numbers it would be only fair play if a similar list of iffy copppers was produced.

(Paris, for the pictures.)

Italian Job sat nav driver cops £900 fine

Beyond belief

I can just imagine the bewilderment at SkyNet: 'Fnck me - they really are that stupid'. Now all our satnavs will turn against us and send us heading towards Beachy Head.

Rise in Northern Ireland violence highlights data failing

They found the information on Google....

... therefore it's just the right place for all our medical records, isn't it? I'm looking forward to this triumph of technology being shouted from the rooftops by various party apparatchiks.

Google will now become the tool of choice for custody sergeants:

'Not the first time you've been taking photographs, is it, sir? Your name keeps cropping up. Care to explain why you've got such an interest in potential terrorist targets such as national parks?'

Brown apologises for 'appalling' treatment of Turing

All very nice, but....

He's had *years* to apologise, as have his predecessors. It's a populist vote-grabber of the very worst sort. Depressingly, this will be trotted out every time his mob want to show they 'listen to people'. (And the other mobs would do the very same, I have no doubt. There's not much to choose from these days.)

Get on with a chuffing pardon and the belated honours that Turing deserves, and stop the posturing.

T-Mobile picks Orange for merger

What shall we get from the merger?

I have a sinking feeling this will mean Orange's level of customer service combined with T-mobile's technical knowledge.

I have a feeling we're doomed.

Investigators blind on P2P child abuse

'impossible to establish'

= 'we're making all of this up'.

The latest (alleged) child abductor and paedophile to be exposed also used tents in his back yard.

Can we expect a similarly sensationalist press release about this? I mean, if you've nothing to hide then compulsory CCTV into your back garden isn't a bad thing, and the banning of tents will be mitigated by government-approved 'people's shelters'. It'll make everyone so much safer.

No, really.

Man remanded for extreme porn offences

@ AC 12:49

Have you got anything to support this? Not that I'm sticking up (ahem) for this kind of stuff, but the spectre of 'trafficked women' keeps getting raised with nothing to back it up. (Or if there is something to back it up, it doesn't bear sensible scrutiny - see the 'Big Brothel' report, for example.)

Of course, if it's not harming trafficked women, then it's funding terrorists.

Exposed activist accuses Tiscali of putting life in peril

You have to love them

I particularly like Tiscali wanting to know her background and why she wanted to remain 'hidden'. No valid reason at all for this, and total fail on recognising that their sales team made a grave error or told a fib.

It's regrettable that the injured party will also get unwanted publicity from this, as I'd like to see Tiscali's silliness made public for all to see.

Unions demands better conditions for temps

Temps are not necessarily contractors

What part of this isn't getting through. Temporary workers are, as a rule, worlds away from making money hand over fist as some of the comments would imply.

One of the very few advantages of being a lowly temp is that the sh!t jobs you get can't be 'insourced' economically, so mostly things can only improve.

Botched judge threat probe downs Fathers 4 Justice website

Another F4J spurious rumour....

Beautiful. I recall the 'Fathers 4 Justice plot to kidnap baby Leo Blair' story had no foundation in truth either, but was gleefully accepted by the red-tops and plod as gospel truth.

It seems anyone that's pissed off the government is subject to a lower standard of proof of criminal intent than, say, ooh, anyone who's *in* the government.

Cops and ISP in paedophile data mix up

More stuff you couldn't make up

Someone has had their door kicked in and their house searched because some wonk can't do international time zones? Wonderful.

Can we safely assume that plod will do much the same as they did in Forest Gate and spend thousands trying to find *something* to pin on the unfortunate victim?

Paris probably doesn't understand international time zones either.

Feminist org declines nude calendar cash

You couldn't make it up....

.... without having to endure howls of outrage from feminists for portraying them as humourless and narrow-minded.

But it's heartening to know that the charity in question is in the position of being able to turn down donations offered in good faith. Potential donors should bear that in mind.