* Posts by Captain Hogwash

966 posts • joined 23 Feb 2009

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The good news: Vodafone switches on first full-fat, real-life 5G network in the UK. The bad news: it only got sent to Coventry

Captain Hogwash

Re: Blah, blah, blah...

Nah, SIP account keeps my four year old phone, with user replaceable battery, out of landfill.

Captain Hogwash

Re: Blah, blah, blah...

Have wi-fi? Get yourself a SIP account. Make calls inside in the winter.

Linux kernel coders propose inclusive terminology coding guidelines, note: 'Arguments about why people should not be offended do not scale'

Captain Hogwash

I'll just leave this here

“It's a beautiful thing, the destruction of words.”

― George Orwell, 1984

Captain Hogwash
Joke

Re: No problem with most of it, but...

stakeholders. Hmmm. Sounds a bit aggressive, violent even.

Dutch national broadcaster saw ad revenue rise when it stopped tracking users. It's meant to work like that, right?

Captain Hogwash
Coffee/keyboard

Re: I was signed into gmail on both machines

Well, duh!

It's National Cream Tea Day and this time we end the age-old debate once and for all: How do you eat yours?

Captain Hogwash

Re: ...delightful cakey accompaniment is pronounced "scone"...

I'm glad you've shone some light on that for us. The argument might have gone on for ages otherwise.

Huawei wins approval to plonk £1bn optical comms R&D facility in UK's leafy Cambridgeshire

Captain Hogwash
Coat

Re: Scott Walker appears to have "the Trump touch" at dealmaking

I guess the sun ain't gonna shine anymore.

Facebook accused of trying to bypass GDPR, slurp domain owners' personal Whois info via an obscure process

Captain Hogwash

Outragous

Sadly, if I were to try and explain this to the facebook users I know, they would collapse with boredom long before I finished explaining what a domain is.

Moore's Law is deader than corduroy bell bottoms. But with a bit of smart coding it's not the end of the road

Captain Hogwash

Re: Things grow ... until they don't

Did you know that disco record sales were up 400% for the year ending 1976, if these trends continue...AY!

Surprise! That £339 world's first 'anti-5G' protection device is just a £5 USB drive with a nice sticker on it

Captain Hogwash

Re: What 5G ?

https://glastonbury.gov.uk/5g-report/

Captain Hogwash

Re: I'm no fool

Hmmm. Tell me more about your hosing project. Sounds a bit NSFW.

There's a world out there with a hexagon vortex over its pole packed with hydrocarbon ice crystals. That planet is Saturn

Captain Hogwash

Saturn?

Arg, surely?

What do you call megabucks Microsoft? No really, it's not a joke. El Reg needs you

Captain Hogwash

Big Grey

See title.

Microsoft decrees that all high-school IT teachers were wrong: Double spaces now flagged as typos in Word

Captain Hogwash

Re: I don't know what you Brits got taught at school

Brit here. Never heard of this double space thing until I read this article so going to keep using one space.

Just because we're letting Zoom into Parliament doesn't mean you can have fun, House of Commons warns Brit MPs

Captain Hogwash

Re: avoid holding sensitive conversations, even when on mute

Open the pod bay doors HAL.

Frippin' heck: Watch out, chin-stroking prog rock fans. King Crimson distributor Burning Shed says it's been hacked

Captain Hogwash
Coat

Re: but no credit card deets

Phew! That could've been easy money for some miscreant.

Baby, I swear it's déjà vu: TalkTalk customers unable to opt out of ISP's ad-jacking DNS – just like six years ago

Captain Hogwash

Re: doing the sane thing for years

Freudian slip?

So how do the coronavirus smartphone tracking apps actually work and should you download one to help?

Captain Hogwash

Re: ...and should you download one to help?

This question, posed by the headline, was not answered by the article.

Microsoft attempts to up its Teams game with new features while locked-down folk flock to rival Zoom... warts and all

Captain Hogwash

Re: helps to see how people are reacting ... not just ... the current speaker.

Same problem with Webex, which seems to be our company's conferencing software of choice (although we also have Teams & Skype for Business.)

Minister slams 5G coronavirus conspiracy theories as 'dangerous nonsense' after phone towers torched in UK

Captain Hogwash
Headmaster

Re: high frequency vibrations cause pandemic[1] - headline

Fewer vibration frequencies!

Delivery drones: Where are they when we really need them?

Captain Hogwash

Delivery drones of the future...

will be blimps.

UK enters almost-lockdown: Brits urged to keep calm and carry on – as long as it doesn't involve leaving the house

Captain Hogwash

Re: shoot in the head

Way to spread the virus dude. Obviously they'll use tasers.

BT's Wi-Fi Disc ads banned because there's no evidence the things work

Captain Hogwash

Re: "sheer bollockery"

Don't forget twatdangle.

Pervasive digital surveillance of citizens deployed in COVID-19 fight, with rules that send genie back to bottle

Captain Hogwash

Re: Covid-29

Damn those viruses mutate quickly.

Tinfoil hat brigade switches brand allegiance to bog paper

Captain Hogwash
Meh

To be truly effective...

The Shungite Plate would probably need to smell like Gwyneth Paltrow's vagina.

Captain Hogwash

Re: you'd still struggle to get through a couple of rolls

You would. I would. But my SO? Mme Dabbs? In my experience it seems that women must eat the stuff. It's the only explanation I can think of for why it disappears so quickly when one is in residence.

House of Lords push internet legend on greater openness and transparency from Google. Nope, says Vint Cerf

Captain Hogwash

Re: The real reason he's so "cagey"

I'm fairly sure he wasn't under oath. That tends to be reserved for court appearances rather than committee meetings.

Hello, support? What do I click if I want some cash?

Captain Hogwash

Digital Eagles

Digital Dodos more like.

Grab a towel and pour yourself a Pan Galactic Gargle Blaster because The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy is 42

Captain Hogwash

Re: I remember...

You'll be needing a flying tea pot to go with that cup.

After 16 years of hype, graphene finally delivers on its promise – with a cosmetic face mask

Captain Hogwash

Re: has not said quite how its cosmetic face masks will benefit from graphene

I'm not surprised. I suspect the chief benefit will be that the products can now be marketed as containing graphene. Given that the amount of pseudoscience in cosmetics advertising seems to encourage the unthinking to buy more this can only be a win for the producers.

Broadband providers can now flog Openreach's new IP voice network in bid to ditch UK's copper phone lines by 2025

Captain Hogwash

Re: How will this work if they need to both be plugged into one VOIP socket on a router?

DECT base station, as many people already use.

Captain Hogwash

Vodafone VDSL routers already have the socket by the look of the one they sent me. Never switched it on though so no idea if it does anything.

Sure, check through my background records… but why are you looking at my record collection?

Captain Hogwash

Re: credit rating

Much. Thank you.

Captain Hogwash

Re: credit rating

Do you mean "credit rating"? I sincerely hope any loan applications I might make in the future are not turned down because I don't have a Facebook account.

Departing MI5 chief: Break chat app crypto for us, kthxbai

Captain Hogwash
WTF?

Re: Let's think about this...

I love unicorns. Rainbows too.

London's top cop dismisses 'highly inaccurate or ill informed' facial-recognition critics, possibly ironically

Captain Hogwash
Flame

Re: In an age of Twitter and Instagram and Facebook...

They keep trotting out this same old guff without ever acknowledging that people choose whether or not to participate in the aforementioned.

The Wristwatch of the Long Now: When your MTBF is two centuries

Captain Hogwash
Unhappy

Re: The tech bros and the late-stage capitalists are all about "creating value"

Yes, shareholder value.

Vodafone: Yes, we slurp data on customers' network setups, but we do it for their own good

Captain Hogwash

Re: So...

Vodafone gave me the login details for VDSL when I signed up a few months ago. I've been using my own kit (and only my own kit) with every ISP for the last 10 years or so since I realised O2 were trashing my configuration settings in the router they supplied whenever they forced a firmware update.

So, to be clear, my LAN is safe from this slurpage or not?

Captain Hogwash

Re: So...

I'm not sure I understand you. I have been using only my own kit with various ISPs for many years. Does this mean my LAN is unslurpable by the ISP or am I as vulnerable to it as though I was using the ISP supplied kit?

Captain Hogwash

So...

For the benefit of an ignoramus such as myself, this can't be avoided by not using the Vodafone supplied router?

Private equity ponies up £2m to help launch satellites from sunny Shetland by next year

Captain Hogwash

Re: There are deserts in Britain?

Dungeness.

Captain Hogwash

Re: What was it Burns said?

"Since the beginning of time, man has yearned to destroy the sun"

Is it OPPOsites day? Chinese smartphone giant expected to develop its own silicon

Captain Hogwash
Pint

Re: TL;DR - sounds good

Something to look forward to when I'm 134.

Aw, look. The UK is still trying really hard to be the 'safest place to be online in the world'

Captain Hogwash
Meh

To some people apparently.

Brave, Google, Microsoft, Mozilla gather together to talk web privacy... and why we all shouldn't get too much of it

Captain Hogwash

Re: Why it's absolutely necessary...targeted to individuals?

The advertisers like it because they believe that this will mean only those who might be interested in buying a product or service will see an ad. This means they won't be spending money advertising said product or service to anyone who has no interest in it. The analytics people who actually do the tracking and aggregating of collected personal data like it because they can charge the advertisers more for the targeting service than if they were merely selling billboard space/air time. Presumably both parties make/save more money this way or the practice would have died out by now.

FWIW I agree with you and believe every effort should be made to thwart tracking.

Ding-dong. Who's there? Any marketing outfit willing to pay: Not content with giving cops access to doorbell cams, Ring also touts personal info

Captain Hogwash

Just wondering...

Is the Ring really anything much more than a SIP videophone mounted outside your front door? Seems reasonably straightforward to implement without involving Team Slurp.

We need to make it even easier for UK terror cops to rummage about in folks' phones, says govt lawyer

Captain Hogwash

Re: "for quite reasonably refusing to incriminate themselves or others"

Not sure why the thumbs down. I was once arrested and threatened with exactly this.

Captain Hogwash

Re: "for quite reasonably refusing to incriminate themselves or others"

The police tend to view this as Perverting the Course of Justice. This is usually rewarded with a prison sentence.

Ancient Ore Crusher or KillBot 2000? NASA gets ready to pick a name for its Mars 2020 Rover

Captain Hogwash

KillBot 2000

Surely by now people are suggesting KillBot 3000?

The article alludes to my preference: TrundleBot 9000.

Is it a make-up mirror? Is it a tiny frisbee? No, it's the bonkers Cyrcle Phone, with its TWO headphone jacks

Captain Hogwash
Coat

Re: I do miss the days...

Don't worry, these things tend to go in cycles. It's bound to come around again.

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