* Posts by Paris Hilton

29 publicly visible posts • joined 18 Feb 2009

Cockatoo grabs his tool, manages to get hold of boffins' nuts

Paris Hilton
Paris Hilton

Re: Astounding creatures!


Paris Hilton tweets armed intruder drama

Paris Hilton

Give a facial.

Sorry, only Kate's Serum on my face today.

Cashpoint mugger flashes distractionary chesticles

Paris Hilton
Paris Hilton


Not for €300.

PARIS skins up with Rizlas and dope

Paris Hilton
Paris Hilton


Thats a bit nippy.

The Register comment guidelines 2010

Paris Hilton
Paris Hilton

Shoehorn Paris Hilton into each and every comment thread

Thats easy.

PARIS pops down to QinetiQ

Paris Hilton
Dead Vulture

PARIS Suck Off, Fail.

Lester I'm Disapointed.. a huge vacuum chamber able to suck off 70kPa in 0.1 second! and all you could come up with is 'PARIS pops off'

Tsk Tsk...

US X-37B robot minishuttle: 'Secret space warplane'?

Paris Hilton
Paris Hilton

Apology Accepted.

Although I dont have a welcome mat, sorry.

Wii Fit fall woman turns into nympho

Paris Hilton
Paris Hilton

wondering if I need a Wii

wow! someone who hasn't seen one night.

Peer 1 Hosting puts up for Reg space mission

Paris Hilton

Deja Vu?



WTF is wrong with the space time thingy?

Huawei E5 Wi-Fi/3G modem

Paris Hilton

cupperty I Love You!

Joikuspot is brilliant! Thats just saved me about a million quid.

Joikuspot Needs more attention!! El Reg you listening? review required!

Hubble probes deepest universe

Paris Hilton
Thumb Up

Whenever life get you down, Mrs. Brown

And things seem hard or tough

And people are stupid, obnoxious or daft

And you feel that you've had quite enu-hu-hu-huuuuff

Just remember that you're standing on a planet that's evolving

And revolving at 900 miles an hour

That's orbiting at 19 miles a second, so it's reckoned

A sun that is the source of all our power

The sun and you and me, and all the stars that we can see

Are moving at a million miles a day

In an outer spiral arm, at 40,000 miles an hour

Of the galaxy we call the Milky Way

Our galaxy itself contains 100 billion stars

It's 100,000 light-years side-to-side

It bulges in the middle, 16,000 light-years thick

But out by us it's just 3000 light-years wide

We're 30,000 light-years from galactic central point

We go round every 200 million years

And our galaxy is only one of millions of billions

In this amazing and expanding universe

The universe itself keeps on expanding and expanding

In all of the directions it can whiz

As fast as it can go, at the speed of light you know

Twelve million miles a minute and that's the fastest speed there is

So remember, when you're feeling very small and insecure

How amazingly unlikely is your birth

And pray that there's intelligent life somewhere up in space

Because there's bugger all down here on Earth

Germans devise attacks on Windows BitLocker

Paris Hilton


I'm betting you don't work in IT!

No actually I'm Hoping you don't work in IT!

What you doing here?

come to think of it what am I doing here?

AMD dual-Radeon HD 5870 card spied on web

Paris Hilton

Shave my Slot

What ever do you mean?

Sony Bravia KDL-46Z5500 200Hz 46in LCD TV

Paris Hilton

does anyone actually tune favourite channels?

I used to but every freeview channel update say every 14 days wipes them making them a pointless waste of time.

Peugeot's bulbous BB1 e-car bound for Blighty

Paris Hilton

I'm actually tempted to get one of these..

Then get it Vinyl Wrapped with a picture, like those ones you see on the busess of headless people that line up with the internal seats, but this car would need all sorts of contortion positions... maybe playing Twister...

very tempted..

Tesla Roadster travels 313 miles on single charge

Paris Hilton

@ AC Well then why didn't he drive it another three miles to set the record even higher?

Because thats not an offical distance! as required to claim the world record, hence why these 'official distances' are being set on staged events.

the only way to get the true maximum would be to have an officiated distance event running a known circuit... which would not be cheap to set up.

Suzuki unveils fuel cell e-scooter

Paris Hilton

@Any Idiot ranting about compressing Hydrogen!

Before you start READ:


now rant away...

El Reg space paper plane christened Vulture 1

Paris Hilton

PARIS should be a manned mission...

So let me guess...

a Playmobil character inserted into PARIS' Crew Utility Node Thingy

Or perhaps you can use another Cockpit / Box reference...

Labour MP quits over McKinnon extradition vote

Paris Hilton
Paris Hilton

I say....

I'm, like, SO bored of this McKinnock guy and his aparagus syndrome. Can't we, like, change the channel or something? Oh my God, he's just a hacker geek, anyway, yeah?

Minority Report command sales system pushes Euro UAV

Paris Hilton
Paris Hilton

Paris Hier Show

Damn did I miss it? lost my phone/organiser.

US team create carbon nanotube ultra-memory

Paris Hilton

I for one welcome our Nano Overlords..

With there Carbon Nanotube Railguns...

Hmm.. wonder what velocity these projectiles can reach by accidental static discharge???

Futurama back from dead again

Paris Hilton

I for one welcome our hypnotoad overlords...

shouldn't that be Philip J Fry? Aa in the same middle name as Homer J Simpson? (Jay as in Jay ward?)

as Zoidberg would say Woop woop woop..

Site news: Unique commenter handles coming

Paris Hilton
Paris Hilton

I dont get it..

not a surprise really.

NASA postpones Discovery ISS jaunt

Paris Hilton
Paris Hilton

No Really .. I'm Not a Rocket Scientist

But even I know that if you want the liquid to come out you need to put a gas back in... Glug Glug.. and in the case of liquid Hydrogen, you really dont want to let the air in.. warmed up Hydrogen as gas from the engines is best!

NASA 'scope captures ferocious gamma ray burst

Paris Hilton
Paris Hilton


'The explosion, known to its chums as GRB 080916C, occurred on 15 September in the constellation Carina at a distance of 12.2 billion light-years from Earth'


'The explosion, known to its chums as GRB 080916C, was detected on 15 September in the constellation Carina at a distance of 12.2 billion light-years from Earth'

(even I know it occured 12.2 Billion Years ago)

Euro-style GM Volt design revealed

Paris Hilton
Paris Hilton

I like electric cars...

I haven't been able to find a hair drier to fit my regular car now they are mains voltage I'm sure it wont be long.

Fake Canon exec blogger rebuffs legal beef

Paris Hilton
Paris Hilton


would anyone want to pretend to be someone else?