Posts by Oddbodd

Abracadabra! Tales of unexpected sysadmagic and dabbling in dark arts

Kudos to the guy who came up with assumed name "Timmy" for a mallet story.

Mirror mirror on sea wall, spot those airships, make Kaiser bawl

Schoolboy error

Middlesbrough, not Middlesborough.

User fired IT support company for a 'typo' that was actually a real word

This is defiantly my favourite On-Call ever.

1980s sci-fi movies: The thrill of being not quite terrified on mum's floral sofa

Falling for the pedant bait

"Marty McFly and hoverboard in Back to the Future"

Back to the Future II, I believe.

Proposed Brit law to ban b**tards brandishing bots to bulk-buy tickets

Re: Handling charges

Shoutout to Sunderland Empire who once wanted me to pay three quid for box office collection. That's three quid for them to do nothing.

The ultimate full English breakfast – have your SAY

At least two sausages. At least two rashers of bacon, nicely crisped. None of this chewy nonsense. Black pudding definitely. No two ways about that. Eggs fried, yolk runny. As long as we have all that, add whatever else you want - hash browns, mushrooms, beans, but remember - the tomato is just there to make it look nice. Never eat the tomato.

Can Facebook influence an election result?

Re: Can't think of a good one

Sarcasm that feels all too close to the truth. of course, if anyone's that dumb, I'm glad they don't exercise their real vote.

Apple trade marks 'There's an app for that'

Workaround

Easy way to get around this - just amend the abbreviation a tad:

"Copyright whores? There's an appl for that!"

Disney punts hetero luuurv to wide-eyed kiddies

Hardly an influence

Regarding these sorts of whinges on "impressing roles" upon kids, I often point out that when I was a lad, I got toy guns for Christmas, and my sister got Barbie dolls. Now, She's in the Army, and I'm a panto dame.

If these films did have that sort of influence, she'd now be a princess, co-habiting with 7 wizened geriatrics, and I'd probably be an axe-wielding wicked queen's bitch. Not the case.

PETA pronounces on Obama fly-swat

Hmmmm....

"He isn't the Buddha, he's a human being"

Correct me if I'm wrong, but Buddha was a human being.

Too busy to make a jam sandwich? M&S can help

What problem?

This is a good thing. I've whinged for years about sandwich shops never selling "proper" sarnies - i.e. Marmite, peanut butter, jam, et cetera. They're certainly a lot more appealing than the usual "healthy choice" rubbish that is stuffed full of rotting lettuce.

Bring it on.

Boffins ponder Geordies' lack of winter clothing

And it's not just the pubs and clubs...

Every time Newcastle United are on telly, even if it's an away tie at Antarctica United, there's always at least one shot of a shirtless, bald, Geordie shouting his mouth off while swilliing lager (more recently, this has been the club's owner). What is also noticeable about each of these fellows is that they make Jabba the Hutt look like something off a Special K advert. Natural insulation, innit?

Ticketmaster and Live Nation forge unholy alliance

LiveNation, Soulless indeed

These are the people who run Sunderland Empire, who tried charging me a £3 fee for box office collection for tickets a while ago. Needless to say, I didn't buy them. Along with booking fee, the extra charges would have amounted to more than 25% of the advertised ticket prices.

ArseASA rules 'Feck' non-offensive

I'd try...

...to look up the history of Feck on Wikipedia, to check the statements made above. But I bet the IWF have blacklisted that page.