Posts by Steve Spiller

Periodic table adding new element

Any bets on what it's going to be called?

I'll start by naming the thing which is sinking faster than anything else on the planet - SCOX stock

Security holes poked in Chinese compulsory PC filter plan

Sound familiar?

"By creating a software monoculture the Chinese authorities are creating a risk that a vulnerability in the software, providing it was serious enough to allow remote code injection, could be used to create a huge botnet. More subtle flaws might also be used to create targeted attacks on government computers - a factor that is unlikely to pass unnoticed down at the NSA."

Riiight, so that's different from Microsoft and Windows how exactly?

Mines the one with the <insert distro> Linux Live CD in the pocket

'D'oh!' tops fave kids' TV catchphrase poll

@Peter Hawkins & Crackerjack

Ahhh yes, Crackerjack. Used to drive me step-mum up the wall watching that program. She hated it with a passion!

You should have seen her face when I answered her with a D'Oh! Mind you, I think that's how I developed such quick duck and cover reactions as a clip round the ear was considered normal back then...

Fond memories of some great TV moments.

Microsoft rebrands WGA nagware for Windows 7

Could have chosen a better name

Surely I'm not the only one to add an extra T to Windows Activation Technologies (WAT)?

Chinese officials obliged to smoke 4.6m snouts

So nothing to do with swine fever?

My first thought when I saw the headline was "Umm, novel way of dealing with Swine Flu but doesn't a flu virus infect the whole body not just the nose?"

This was closely followed by "But pigs have snot running from their noses practically 24/7 so how can you tell if it's got the flu?!"

Guess I need to spend more time inside, or watching some more Porridge repeats...

Hire your very own Fred the Shred

Will it blend?

Reminds me of the "Will it blend?" adverts from BlendTech. Except on a much bigger scale :)

Blunkett to press for cyberwar probe of BT's Chinese kit

What about Windows?

Surely they know that the NSA, DHS & MFI has a backdoor in every copy?!

Sonar causes (temporary) deafness in dolphins

No sh1t Sherlock

"Tests on a captive dolphin indicate exposure to sonar at high, prolonged levels can cause temporary deafness for as long as 20 to 40 minutes — but only if the dolphin stays close to the source of the sonar for several minutes."

Talk about your bloody obvious. Of course the poor dolphin went deaf! So would anything with ears listening to noise at those sort of levels. What are they going to try next? Shine 10,000 watt lights into dogs eyes and see if they go blind? Fecking idiots.

"Other sensors showed the dolphin's breathing rose significantly when the sonar was switched on."

My breathing rises significantly as I try to stop myself from destroying the stereo owned by the tw@t who lives above me and doesn't understand/care that his sub uses the floor as an amplifier. It's called STRESS. I'm no tree hugging, lentil eating hippy (I like nothing better than minced cow between two bits of bread) but this type of pointless cruelty really bugs me.

Stupid so-called scientists like these should be used for 'scientific' studies instead of <insert test creature>. Let's see how their hearing fairs when subjected to prolonged loud noise.

Moderatrix quits El Reg: Latest

@unitron

You owe me a new keyboard! Do you realise how much pain cola causes when it squirts out of your nose?

Microsoft loudly disses secret 'Cloud Manifesto'

Hello Mr Pot

meet Mr Kettle

Microsoft to act on IE8 'show stoppers'

Alternate title

MS openly admit to releasing buggy crap on un^H^Hsuspecting world.

Dutch court convicts teens for stealing pixels

In game attacks don't count

@Scott & Jaap:

read the article - they attacked him in real life, not online. This ruling does not mean you can go crying to the police because you are attacked/killed and have your stuff stolen in a game.

Mines the one with the Mace of Ultimate Thwappage +10 in the pocket