Posts by Dale Richards

Ads body cuts off Skype ad after pic quality complaints

Dell

Don't forget the Dell adverts that suggest you buy a blue laptop to match your blue sweater (with blue laptop pictured), accompanied by small print that reads, "Available in black, red and pink".

Chinese authorities close fatal net treatment camp, arrest 13

@Fluffykins

我国气垫船包含鳗鱼

这是一个很好的方法来阻止美丽 Sarah Bee 检查我们的意见！

Man blames cat for child porn downloads

@Number6

If you have an infinite number of cats walking over an infinite number of keyboards, they will instantaneously produce an infinite number of copies of the entire works of Shakespeare. Additionally, an infinite number of the cats would not produce anything even remotely Shakespearean.

Mathematically speaking, all cats write Shakespeare and all cats don't, therefore the number of cats in the Universe would be exactly zero. In fact, plus/minus infinity is equal to zero, and therefore everything that exists doesn't actually exist.

Do you still want to try this experiment?

El Reg space paper plane christened Vulture 1

Diminutive crew member...

A bee?

Vote now to name El Reg space plane

Queen Bee

Beautiful, delicate, inspiring.

Godspeed, Sarah. May you soar with grace and majesty.

Bask freely in the twinkle of a million stars, but never let them burn your wings.

Gmail shoves 'on behalf of' feature to one side

Not Google's problem

Surely this is an issue with the way certain clients (e.g. Outlook) handle Sender: headers. If people are that annoyed by it, shouldn't they be pestering Microsoft to change Outlook?

Comcast trials Domain Helper service DNS hijacker

@AC 7:19

"Many more sophisticated, nah... competent, DNS administrators typically create a wildcard DNS entry that takes you to a 'the site you're looking for doesn't exist, click on this link blah blah blah' page so that you still land on their webserver..."

You have to remember that WWW isn't the only Internet service, and there's no guarantee that clients performing a DNS lookup are looking for a web server in the first place.

NHS Direct wrongly emailed patients' data

@Jon 48

-- "The information didn't leave the NHS"

This isn't guaranteed. The spreadsheet was emailed to "another part of the health service" - depending on their definitions, it's entirely possible that the email in question travelled over the Internet, and could therefore have been intercepted at any one of a number of points along the way...

ISP redesign unites the web in nausea

Yep, it's nasty...

The site looks terrible, but Be's still a great ISP, so I'll forgive them!

I still haven't forgiven El Reg for the fixed width atrocity that passes for their new design though. Fuck you!

Unpatched Firefox flaw lets fox into henhouse

@Jason DePriest et al

I use Firefox+NoScript as much as the next man, but it's wrong to say that you can't achieve the same thing in IE.

The equivalent functionality is built into IE and does not require any add-ons. Just disable scripting and ActiveX for the Internet Zone and add trusted sites to the Trusted Sites zone. Admittedly, adding sites to Trusted Sites isn't as "two clicks" user friendly as NoScript, but it achieves the same thing.

Toyota preps plug-in Prius for mass production

@David Edwards

> Simply have a generator in the boot (with an exhaust vent) and charge as you park.

It's a hybrid! There's already a perfectly good petrol generator under the bonnet.

Satnav technology becomes self-aware

Correct me if I'm wrong...

...but this is a sat nav that slowly learns how to direct you using the routes you already know?

Spanish court in favour of topless celebs

Title

The only thing missing from that picture is a motorboat - by me!

People just not that into Blu-ray

DRM

Like a lot of people, Blu-ray's DRM scares me. At the moment, I can buy a DVD safe in the knowledge that I can play it forever. Even if DVD players go the way of VHS, I can copy the films onto my PC and transcode them into whatever format I want.

With Blu-ray's DRM, things are too uncertain. I have to spend a fortune on equipment and discs to get films that I might not even be able to watch in 10 years' time!

Until Blu-ray's DRM has been cracked as comprehensively as DVD's, I'll be staying well away.

MPs turn to Black Blob to preserve their dignity

@Burnham's Beds

Duck beds!

RIP Personal Computer World

Very sad...

Very sad to hear this. Now I feel really guilty for cancelling my subscription (but hey, times are hard for all of us!)

Fond memories include Guy's many insights (obviously), but I also remember, in my naivety, flicking straight to Tim Nott's Hands-On Windows 95 column to see the latest flashy developments in GUI decadence. If it weren't for Tim, I would never have left 3.1!

PCW will be sadly missed.

BBC asks nicely to run second hacking demo

Missing the point

The problem with the original BBC Click was not that it involved manipulating the PCs of innocent users without their consent. The real issue is that in purchasing the botnet, they have taken a chunk of licence fee money and poured it directly into the pockets of Russian and Ukrainian criminals.

Of course, the BBC broke the law by accessing the compromised PCs, although it could be argued that they did so in the public interest, and caused no damage.

On the other hand, in buying the botnet, the BBC has funded the real criminals and allowed them to build even bigger botnets with which to carry out their scummy activities.

They would actually have been on (slightly) better ethical ground if they'd written the malware themselves.

Wacky Jacqui spanked by husband

@Fireworks

'It's "hoist with own petard" surely? The bomb doesn't throw you.'

I think you'll find it does in Soviet Russia.

Tesla unwraps Model S

It's an electric car...

...but it actually looks like a car, not a space-age dildo. Very impressed.

Newfangled rootkits survive hard disk wiping

@vincent himpe

How can you make a comment about squirting hot glue and not include the Paris icon??

Gmail offers 'undo' email option

This sounds eerily similar...

...to the ancient, cross-platform technique of waiting an extra 5 seconds before pressing Send, no?

Metallica's Lars Ulrich illegally downloads own album

So...

...is the record company sueing him?

Google blames Gmail outage on data centre collapse

@Compensation for free users?

The free service has no SLA, so no, stop being silly.

The "premier" service does have an SLA, however:

http://www.google.com/apps/intl/en/business/details.html

Born Again Delphi

Oh Verity...

Thanks for your article - it really brightened up my day. Not because you're standing up and fighting for what's right for us Delphi programmers, but just because you're standing up in public and admitting you're still using Delphi, just when I thought I was the only crazy one!

Gears of War grind to halt

@Oliver Mayes

I agree 100%.

I'm as anti-DRM as anyone, but in this case far too many commentards have jumped on the "OMGZ DRM!!!11" bandwagon before they've read the article properly.

The anti-cheat systems built into pretty much all online games *can* be restrictive and on rare occasions like this can cause problems for legitimate users, but at the end of the day they are designed and implemented to *protect* the legitimate user from cheats who spoil it for the rest of us.

Anti-cheat systems could certainly be considered a form of DRM, but unlike most DRM it really does provide added value for the average consumer.

Windows 7 public beta end date named

Moderatrix!

Please, PLEASE can you stop the endless commenting on version numbers every time a Windows 7 story gets published? It's getting very, very old.

kthxbyeeee

US to postpone analog TV death

"Analog"?!

Really?! "Analog"? Is this the kind of spelling I should expect from TheRegister.co.uk?

Cancelling my subscription, etc, etc...

UK.gov prepares for filesharing fracas

Call me a Libertarian...

But what does the Government have to do with this? Surely it's between the rights holders and the ISPs?

Honda shows off Insight hybrid

Nemesis

Considering the Prius is the nemesis of this new Insight, Honda seem to have gone to awfully great lengths to make it look the same as a Prius...

Prisoner star Patrick McGoohan dies at 80

Be seeing you...

...would be a more appropriate sub-headline, of course.

That said, I'm sad to learn of Mr McGoohan's death. The Prisoner was unlike any TV show produced before or since, and will never really be replaced.

Boffins offer plastic printing service

@Harry

I Agree.

I, like many people, read The Register while I'm at work. What I want is a quick flick through the day's technology news at my own pace. I'm not going to be pissing about with headphones and then sitting through some idiot (usually) nattering repetetively and verbosely while some shaky, pixellated crap wobbles on the screen in front of me.

"Video news" = epic FAIL.

Take a hammer to your hard drive, shrieks Which?

I smell FAIL

Overwrite all of your hard disk once with zeroes, using free software such as Darik's Boot and Nuke.

I guarantee that nobody at Which?, or indeed anyone else will be able to recover a single file.

The hard disks they bought from eBay must have been "erased" with something as trivial as a delete or a format.

MSI mobo ditches Bios for EFI

Motivation

"Intel developed the original EFI in a bid to drag the PC out of the 1980s"

I was always under the impression that Intel developed EFI because the Itanic processors couldn't do the x86 real mode that BIOS requires. I really can't see them messing around with it just because BIOS is old. Yes, it is old, but it works, so why change it? Unless you've just developed a retarded processor that can't handle it, of course...

Be Broadband doubles down on ADSL to catch cable

Love it...

This gets the thumbs-up from me.

Sky mulls PVR software rollback

Rolled back...

Woke up this morning to find my Pace PVR2 has had its software rolled back to the previous version.

Not all of us...

I doubt this is Sky's attempt to nobble DIY upgrades.

I have a Pace V2 Sky+ box, I have upgraded the hard disk (with a cheapo Maxtor model) and I have the received the software update in question, but my box is continuing to function as normal.

Lame Mac Trojan limps into view

@glennog

The Apple Mac is essentially a brand of PC with its own operating system. The ads can separate "Macs" from "PCs" all they like, but in technical terms we're all the same.

UK Govt to spend £100m on three-city electric car trial

Too Soon

I feel the government is pushing for adoption of electric vehicles too soon. They're just not ready for public consumption yet. They don't yet have the performance and they certainly don't have the necessary recharging infrastructure to make them viable.

Hybrid cars have been a good stepping stone in getting people green-conscious, and the runaway success of the Prius is testament to this. What we should do is build on this. If the rumours are true about the next Prius having a "plug-in" option then this would be the perfect next step. A hybrid car that can use the existing fuel infrastructure exclusively and still get a decent economy, but will also ramp up demand for an EV recharging infrastructure. When this is in place, electric-only vehicles could find mainstream acceptance.

EVs are great, but we're just not there yet. The public and the government should instead be supporting plug-in hybrids - cars that will pave the way for EVs in the future, but are also pratical for use here and now.

BBC's TV detector vans to remain a state secret

There are no detector vans...

"the broadcaster refused to give further details because if it did so it would damage the public's perception of the effectiveness of TV detector vans"

Says it all, really.

Stob latest: It was a cunning trick, says Open University

Please...

...keep us up-to-date with any developments on this story. I was just inches away from booking myself some OU tuition when Verity blew the initial whistle, and now I'm losing faith with each new bit of cover-up and denial they come out with.

OMFG, what have you done?

Guhhhhhhh

"And we switched to fixed width? We'll sure as hell catch it for that. OK, fire away"

If you know it's wrong, why the fuck did you do it?

Royal Society: Schools should show creationism 'respect'

Creationism *is* Science...

Just wait until that LARGE HARDON COLLIDER goes off and creates the next Big Bang... *Then* you'll understand!

Skype ignores PayPal siphoning hijack scheme

Conned here

Well not me, but my girlfriend. One day she received notification that about £95 had been debited from her PayPal account and credited to Skype. That was odd, because she's never even had a Skype account. Does this make it more of a PayPal problem?

To be fair to PayPal, she did eventually get the money returned.

Scientists unravel galactic spaghetti monster

Well shit the bed...

Is it really Him? Is He really up there?

I am born again.

Home Office lost CDs on 3,000 workers

Special Delivery

"Contrary to agreed procedures, an external contractor sent two discs containing details of foreign nationals to the UK Border Agency by normal post when these should have been sent special delivery."

No, no no NO NO!!

The discs should never have been burned.

Have they learnt nothing?

Thus spake the Moderatrix

VOID

Is the VoID where all my dropped Skype calls end up?

Life a mess? The Moderatrix can help

Hello, Sarah Bee!

Must admit, I'm a big fan of your work!

As I understand it, you were in Shaun of the Dead. Could you tell us which bit, so I can point at the screen and shout, "THAT'S SARAH BEE!"? Thanks!

Fire extinguisher resolves German smoking dispute

@yeah, right

Have you ever tried discharging a powder-based extinguisher? The shit goes everywhere.

My guess is that he probably tried to empty it over the girl only, and failed.

Paramount poised to drop HD DVD

Solid state formats

Many, many years ago (so many that I forget how many it was), I found myself buying my first ever CD player. "This is it," I thought. "The future of audio reproduction is here. Vinyl is dead." I was so excited when I got the thing home that I nearly did a shit.

But I'll never forget what my father said to me. "Don't bother with that nonsense," he said, "it'll all be out of date in a couple of years. Solid state is the way to go, just you wait and see. It's all in the memory chips!"

Fast forward many, many years to the present, and people are still repeating the same old lines, just as they have done for years, and just as my dear old papa used to in the long, long ago. But nothing's really changed. OK, I've seen a couple of MP3 singles in HMV on USB flash drives, but no-one's pretending they're anything other than a gimmick.

So for all those who are saying "solid state is the way to" - I'm ready to believe you. But can anyone tell me when they think it's going to happen?

IE's Acid trip back to conflict

Firefox?

I can't say I've ever got Firefox to pass the Acid2 test, although I've not tried the beta of Firefox 3, so I can't comment on that.