Posts by It wasnt me

US iPhone ready to be tied down?

Did you even get past the the title of the article......

........before mashing your enraged fists into your keyboard?

DAB lobby launches radio scrappage scheme

Why is absolutely every everyone talking such complete rot?

What have you lot got against DAB? The quality is categorically not worse than FM. Fact. Its clear that most commenters havent even listened to one. Theoretically the quality is potentially worse at lower bit rates but you cant hear it on the radios you have dotted around the house. No-one uses FM radio for HI-FI listening, they use CDs for that. (You lot probably dont , cos vinyl is better yada yada yawn).

The features are superb. 2 of my sets allow me to pause and rewind live radio. I never need to wait till the end of a song to hear the presenter tell me what it is, because its there on the screen. Theres no fiddling to get the dial in just the right place to the nearest 1000th of a degree to avoid crackle.

I agree that lots of places dont have signal yet, but that will improve when you old die hards piss off from the airwaves and some bandwidth can be given over to the future.

Just get used to it. DAB radios are great. I was given one as a gift 6 years ago, and was initially sceptical. That lasted minutes once I got one and actually listened to it. And yes, 2 of my sets are mono. But how much stereo separation do you really get on a cheap tranny? And could you really give a monkeys when youre listening to Jeremy Vine in the kitchen preparing lunch ?

Grow up.

UK hot-swaps leaders - Brown out, Cameron in

Or...

60%* of the people that actually care. And the rest dont matter.

*Probably more if you get rid of fiddled postal votes.

Google screws Scroogle

Thats exactly the point, you fool.

Number next to name on ballot - no id.

No name on ballot - no id.

Vote can be traced if someone has both the ballot slips and the list (key) - you are protected from ballot box stuffing, as votes are auditable if required.

Its an absolute necessity that the vote is both private and auditable.*

*Or it was until postal voting introduced the possiblity of large scale un-auditable fraud into the electoral system.

Cheeky voters oust Lembit Opik

Wow.....

I came here, after a pretty bad election to celebrate Jaqui S losing her seat. And you give us old wonky face instead.

3 Cheers for finally seeing the back of that malicious, vile, sycophantic pointless parasitic plague on commen decency that used to be our home secretary.

May you rot in peace.

:-)

Labour candidate tweets postal votes

Yes

Yes, I am going to voet for somebody.

But if Nick Clegg and his uncosted socialist claptrap want my vote theyll have to prise it from my cold dead hand.

As you said, labour have diverted away from the real issues. Dont fall for the shiny Apple branded party though.

Really ?

How in the world can someone so mind numbingly fucking idiotic even make it as far as getting their name on the ballot paper? Really, who would want them as an MP? Fucking pond life. Oh, I see, the labour party. The party that actively encourages and pays people with pond life IQs to breed and supports them with my money.

Fuck off into your hole.

If theres any truth at all to this story, then I hope the person is expelled from the labour party, the result contested and a by election called without the corrupt crap that is postal voting. Why the fuck are they even opened before polling day?

Time for a chill pill.

Jobsian Vendetta - Flash stabbed by Mac the Knife

Oh really !

"We know from painful experience that letting a third party layer of software come between the platform and the developer ultimately results in sub-standard apps."

Now Im not great fan of flash, in fact lets not forget that by and large, it sucks. But if Stevie-J is worried about sub standard apps on his precious Iphone then he could spend his time a lot more productively than writing open letters to the geekier part of the internet.

Might I suggest purging 3/4 of the app-store. Make that 9/10ths. You can start with the fart apps, then move on to the wobbling boobs.

Revealed: Public sector's web gravy train

eh ??

30,000 workers serving around 400,000 households ?? Are you serious? Do they bloody clean them as well? And wash the cars?

Chill pill

<- Take one.

US Airforce secret spaceplane launched successfully

No chance

I can assure you that no government has the finances to send up a space plane with enough fuel to change its orbit regularly, then deposit a bomb with enough intelligence and power to not crash into its _possible_ target accidentally for a few years, and repeat this across a whole fleet. Its just pure fantasy. And if they did want to do this a recoverable space plane would categorically be a completely crap way of achieving it.

Science 0 - 1 Thunderbirds.

Johnson: ID cards will pay for themselves

That guy is an idiot

The scheme is self financing, cost the public pays for the cards.

Right, and the NHS is self financing cos the public pays taxes.

Fucking idiot.

Broadband boss: 'The end of freeloading is nigh'

pah...

What would you rural folk want with broadband anyway ?

Bleeding heart crofters getting in the way of the big issues - letting chavs steal hollywood movies.

Stick to yer sheep.

thats a fair point.

If everything is going to go down the phone line then the broadcast frequencies can be auctioned off. That should raise enough cash to pay for FTTH.

Only it'll get spent on something else, like single mothers handout, or the left handed lesbian lettuce washers income tax subsidy. Something we really need.

Ubuntu Server primed for the bigtime

Wheres the volcano angle ?

All the news needs one.

Obama 'deep space' Mars plans in Boeing booster bitchslap

Brilliant.

Yeah, try selling that to the global PR machine.

Broadband tax scrapped in 'wash-up'

You LOT aRE wORSE THAN daily FAIL!!!! readers

Good god, whats going on here then?

When this tax was announced these message boards were full of people hating it. Why should granny with just her landline pay for rich bankers to get fibre to their holiday cottages.??? You could smell the outrage.

Now someone proposes scrapping it and theres a paradox for the small minded twerps on these boards. Cos that someone is the Conservative party. Yes the nasty tories that mummy told me to hate cos there used to a be a nasty lady called thatcher and she woz evil and made the entire country redundant and privatised everything and spent the money on tory party holiday homes and tax breaks.

Pathetic. Fancy having so little brain matter that you chose the sides in a sensible discussion based on the colour of tie the PM wears.

Labours answer to everything is increase Tax. That is singularly the only solution they have ever had to any problem. Maybe you should look into alternatives, like raising money elsewhere? Or spending less of it???

Morons.

Brass necked suspect swallows USB evidence

I wish ....

.... that I had as much spare time as you.

Are you employed?

Windows Phone 7 blocks out popular HTC model, blames buttons

What a piece of shit

Apple are the company that support a very restricted hardware list, and target their OS to work on just that system.

If MS want to go the same route they will need to create an OS that works. Which they have never done in their history. I think its a bit late for MS to move away from commodity hardware support now.

I really hope this is the final nail in their coffin. MS Mobile is the only product coming out of redmond that I have ever got on with. They just lost a customer.

What a bunch of w£$&$rs. Fancy limiting you market and winding up your customer base for the sake of an extra couple of buttons. Unbelievable.

Vulcan kept airborne by £400k refuel

Great..

I saw it at Bournemouth airshow last summer. Every single penny that gets spent on that thing is worthwhile. It is truly staggering to see and hear it. When it pointed its engines at the beach and opened up the throttles it was like the gates to hell had opened.

Long may it continue flying.

Labour MP denies calling Tories 'scum-sucking pigs' on Twitter

I really cant believe it.

What is most disappointing is that the people of Telford elected that mindless imbecile. Yes, collectively, Telford have said, "Hes the man. That's who I want to be my representative in parliament. When it comes to big decisions on the economy and the wars, he's the man I trust to do the right thing by me."

Come on Telford, what is wrong with you ? Did you even look at his picture???????

FFS, Telford should have the vote taken away.

And any MP who posts anything at all on Tw@tter should have their salary halved, as its not what I call work, and its not what I pay them for.

Bastards.

US lab births flexy, stingy solar cells

@Finally

Er, not really. At 60 deg north we'll be charitable and say the incident solar radiation gives you 400W/m2. Ill charitably say your car might have 6 m2 of your new paint, so youll get 2.4 KW of useable power in ideal conditions with 100% efficiency.

Even a 1.3 suzuki swift turfs out 68KW, and youre going to need a lot more than that if you want to store some in batteries for driving at night, or in a tunnel.

Im afraid you wont ever really see a useable solar powered vehicle anywhere out side of the large deserts, and the ones there wont be v ery good.

With the quoted efficiency, your 6m2 car will currently have about 400W available power on a very sunny day in July in scotland. This might power a half decent stereo.

Im not a naysayer petrolhead, Im just pointing out that the sun doesnt burn bright enough.

Chinese tablet maven threatens iPad suit

Youre spot on ....

..... with this article. On a first look they do appear to be the same design. But any judge will surely throw this out when he notiices the weight discrepancy.

Well noticed.

Spanish town to reward good drivers

@Ha Ha

"motorists bemoaning their lot as a poor descriminated-against minority"?????????

You dont think its possible that theres no minority issue at all, they are just moaning at the petty bureaucracy and stealth taxes?

Just like you, in fact, in your first paragraph.

You sound like a confused daily mail reader, not knowing which way to run when 2 conflicting viewpoints create a paradox that a tiny mind cannot deal with.

Prolific hacker releases PlayStation exploit

Its a bit quiet round here

Where is everyone from yesterday saying he hasnt hacked anything?

DHS 'brainiacs' to commercialise airport liquids-OK scanner

great

As another boon to the DHS, will they not also fry your harddrives, credit cards and memory sticks? M in 'MRI' being for Magnetic after all. Or are they not powerful enough ?

Apple: iPhone App and iTunes stores don't make money

Wow.....

He said new products. With an 's'. Theres going to be more than one !!!!! I cant wait? What else will there be? Obviously weve all worked out the ITablet/Slate/Pad one.

I reckon the other on will be a bit like a ferrari, but with a 40 inch touch screen. It will read your thoughts and know what colour you want it to be. And it will be a bit shiny, but with breasts. And some fur. And it will run OSX and Windows and Ubuntu. And, and and and...... And it will like me. Even when everone else thinks they might have turned of my life support. And it will make toast.

Go Apple !!!!!

Apple's iPad - the tablet with the data center soul

@jake

Really ? Do you really find it _scary_ that no-one, not a single person, has commented on a message board about a feature that might (or might not) exist, on a device that factually doesnt exist yet, and hasnt even been announced?

Wow.

And youve already put it on a "dont get list" based on lack of speculation about speculation. More wow.

Ill suggest that it probably wont come with built in advertising, as none of apples other products do. (Apps yes, Apple products no). How does that shift your future parallel speculative non-existent universe?

You might have to cross it off that list. Unless its just the apple logo that got it on there.

Windows 7 users to fly without SP parachute

@The Original Steve

Thanks. Youve just talked me out of windows 7. I thought with all the hype that it would be better than Vista. However if its just the same as a fully patched and up to date version of Vista then it will be an inexcusably shit pile of stinking turd.

How the fuck can a 2007 dual core 2.6 GHz laptop with 3 gig of ram be soooooo much slower than a sony vaio from 2002 running XP.

Wankers. It even has a "designed for Vista" sticker on it. Still, thats DELL and MS not getting a penny from me again.

Note to MS. You OS doesnt need cosmetic changes. It needs binning. Or burning.

Ahhhhhhh. I feel better now.

Microsoft predicts Linux will fail mobile 'quality' test

Just for some balance......

Im on my second windws phone (1st XDA orbit, second, HTC Touch HD). They have both been absolutely superb. I cant stand windows on the desktop, even less so since vista. Windows mobile is fine though for what most people want. I dont have any of the problems described above, and only every reboot my phone when I get off a plane (and no, I dont fly 7 times a week, more like 2-3 a year).

Yet windows will still fail, because most people dont care what OS is on their phone, but those that do wouldn't buy a winmob if it was the only phone on earth.

Microsofts only chance of ever getting any market share is to release exactly the same software, with all windows branding removed and replaced by a penguin, and not charge anything for it.

And theyre not going to do that, are they ?

Mini-asteroid sneaks up on Earth

@ Errrr what ?1? 13:07

What about all the sub 25 M ones on the ground ?

Who knows, im stumped.

Or maybe before they hit our atmosphere they were 26 metre ones that nearly burnt up.

Just a thought.

Google may exit China after 'highly targeted' attack

Couldnt agree more

Why is China not not block completely and utterly? Physically remove any comms links from China. Its not like the serve any useful purpose. Hacking and spam severed overnight, and its probably the very best way of getting the chinese population to stand up for their human rights. I geninely cant understand the need for a web link to china. We dont even understand the character set. The restof the world would be a better place if China were left to run their own internet (and entire tch sector) rather than stealing everyone elses.

Brown offers free laptops to deprived UK schoolkids

Call me cynical.....

But:

1>. These laptops will be on eBay, BNIB. Perhaps gordon should visit homes where they cant afford a laptop. I would suggest that if you can afford a 48 inch plasma, 40 fags, 2 crates of hoffmeister and 6 litres of white lightning a day, you can afford a laptop. And youll find that lot in every one of those homes.

2>. Whats in it for MS ? Getting them wile theyre young maybe with immersive advertising, feeding them MS crack whilst they dont know what theyre doing.

Well done Gordon. Youre a genius. Or an idiot.

UK etailer calls self 'the last place you want to go'

...at last..... ( @AC 05:56)

Thats better. Ive been banging my head against the wall trying to understand what it was all about.. Thanks for clearing it all up, now my headache will be gone in time for christmas.

Vodafone: No HD2 for you!

Bye bye vodafone

I left vodafone about 4 years ago when they wouldnt let me have one of the HTC phones because I wasnt a business customer. I really didnt get it. I was happy to pay the asking price, but they just didnt want my money. The other 3 were happy to sell me one on any tarrif I liked. Bizarre. Havent looked back though. If a company can afford to pick and choose its customers like then good luck to them. Previously I had been a Vodafone cutomer for many years with an expensive tarrif.

China executes securities trader over $9.52m fraud

Hmmmmm......

I normally love the register for its sarcastic comments and humorous catch-lines. I think that just once though, you have gone too far. I never thought I'd say that about the register.

It is a mans life that has been taken.......... Perhaps its not really a good article for a funny sub-heading.

Pure Sensia widget-running DAB radio

@Alan Brown

I take it you dont own a DAB radio?

Try it, they are tuly brilliant. I personally own 4. 3 of them are made by Pure. I genuinely think they are some of the best kit I have bought in years.

As the other poster pointed out, have a peek at some of your facts, cos they are quite demonstrably pure crap.

Eat frozen food and avoid line-caught fish, says eco study

What a load of crap.

Thats a pretty shitty report, if you dont mind me saying so. Hes saying to reduce carbon emissions, buy frozen fish. Why not buy locally caught fish? Surely that makes more sense? I dont buy veg thats not in season cos its not local. I dont therefore buy it frozen.

Utter shite.

Record company exec cuffed for failure to twitter

WTF ?

You can get arrested for _NOT_ twitting? How wrong is that? In my parallel universe of dreams it's the other way around.

Bring be in, im guilty as charged. Is it a DNA harvesting offence?

Combat games disrespect war laws, report claims

Too right.

It's disgusting the way these video games work. Just last night I was appalled at the violence in Worms. I mean who would call in an airstrike to kill a bloody worm for gods sake?

And what had that poor sheep done to deserve its gruesome and frankly unnecessary death?

This sort of violence needs removing from our houses immediately, if only to protect the children.

Queen's Speech slammed by small biz

Theres an error in the first line:

"Small business groups were less than impressed with Gordon Brown's fantasy list of what he would do in the unlikely event that he is re-elected as Prime Minister."

--- should have read :----

"Small business groups were less than impressed with Gordon Brown's fantasy list of what he would do in the unlikely event that he is elected as Prime Minister."

Fixed it for you.....

HELL-beam project now one step from jet-fighter raygun

@ Neal 5

You never know, maybe, just maybe, all those kW of laser enery will melt your 50c mirror rather than reflecting it.

Im going to trust that DARPA might have thought of this.

German boffins produce sim of 'invisibility carpet' in action

What a load of ......

So the point was to make a bumb in the floor invisible?

Sorry, but that was rubbish. Just put a bleeding rug over it. That would have been far more effective.

Who pays for this meaningless drivel under the guise of research?

Apple pen-tablet plan revives Newtonian handwriting

@Robert E A Harvey

"The obvious solution is to put the books on tiny memory slips, like microSD, and give the reader half a dozen slots and a pocket on the back to keep a few hundred more in."

That sir, is an obvious solution. One obvious solution to get to the sun is to flap your wings and fly there. Both are completely unworkable and impractical.

I think both the industry and the consumer want rid of physical media (per book/song/film). We just need to find a way to kee both sides happy wrt copying. When the starting point for negotiation from the industry is "we want the same price per initial sale, but remove all rights / possbilities for resale and reduce production cost", it is never going to be easy. Selling them on expensive silicon wont help at all, and is as environmentally unsound as you could reasonably hope for.

Brown declines to resign

@Rob E

"I personally think GBrown has just been VERY unlucky with the situation hes been dropped in.

The world recession was not his fault......."

I think youre probably right, but he was very quick to claim credit when it was all going so well.

"No more boom and bust...." "Britain is well placed to weather a recession..."

" and to be fair I think hes doing a pretty good job of keeping things completely out of the sh1t."

That is just demonstrably not true. US, France and Germany are out of recession. We are not. How can you possibly support him or even believe anything he has ever said?

"I dont imagine that putting Cameron in GBrown's position would have resulted in a better situation everything else being equal, in fact I fear it would probably be a lot worse."

Probably not. But the key is the words "putting Cameron in Gbrowns position". You have hinted at democracy there. No-one ever put brown in his position, not even his own party. He was elected as MP for Kirkcaldy and Cowdenbeath, then annointed himself leader of the labour party and by extension prime minister. There was no internal election. And thats his problem. He has no mandate to govern. You, and others like you are supporting government without the will of the people. History shows us that that is almost never a good thing. The only thing that keeps GB in charge is his own resolve and thirst for power. As Plato taught us, "He who does not desire power is fit to hold it." In any form of meaningful government, the converse also holds true.

Fibreless fibre optics developed by US Air Force

@AC 22:16

Go and read up on quantum encryption. If you still think that eavesdropping by projecting onto fog is "trivial" then go get yourself a job in quantum communications. You will become a very rich man, almost overnight.

Best of luck ......

Clearly a boffin.

Musos demand Guantanamo Bay playlist

Clearly

He assured the volume level was "far below a live band".

This is superfluous information. It was clearly the content that was torture, and not the volume. Although bizarrely it appears that they didnt think to use any morissey.

Beer, for Friday.

Historian slams 'absolutely crazy' UK time zone

Bleeding good idea.

Its a genius idea. Theres hundreds of arguments for / against. But the only one that matters is my free time.

Its dark when I go to work in the morning regardless, but an extra hour of daylight in the evenings in winter would be great.

End of. Now make it so.

And Im massively surprised that that complete tit-end Salmon running scotland hasnt tried to stick the scots on a different time anyway just to annoy us brits.

Note to scots / salmon: Couldnt care less what you do. If you want independence, take it. You elected the knobhead.

Google apes Microsoft's Twitter pact in real-time

Allow me.....

...... to shoot some fish in this barrel for you.

Firstly:

"We believe that our search results and user experience will greatly benefit from the inclusion of this up-to-the-minute data, and we look forward to having a product that showcases how tweets can make search better in the coming months."

Should have read:

"We know full well that our search results and user experience will not benefit at all from the inclusion of this up-to-the-minute drivel, and we look forward to having a product that showcases how tweets can pollute search even more in the coming months."

There, fixed that one.

Secondly:

What does this mean for netizens?

Well, very little. I understand that google attempts to sort by relevance to your query. That should prevent anything from twitter ever getting anywhere near any search results.

@Jeremy 2:"(Presumably they're not turning their data over to MS and Google for now't?)"

I would presume such a thing. I really can't see MS or G (MSG?) paying for the musings of the internet's pondlife.

On a serious note, Google really could do with a button that excludes blogs, twitter, facefuck etc. A "Give me what I want" button. It could actually be hardware, a big red one on the front of the machine, sharing functionality with Windows, where it is a "Just do what I tell you, nothing more" button.

If only .......

UK fatties demand 'hate crime' status for lardo-baiting

What a load of ....

Reallly, go on a diet. People cant change their sexuality or skin colour or religious heritage. Or even being ginger.

You, however, can quite happily stop stuffing your face full of cake if the taunts are getting too much.

I dont like getting up in the morning, but Im not calling for legal protection to protect my rights to being downright lazy.

Stop stuffing your face and do some exercise.

Lard-arse. (Sue me).