Posts by steve-C

Internet Explorer 9 pulls on best pants for 14 March release

Oh can it be true

As if the 14th being "steak and a blow job day" wasn't enough....I get a new version of the world's favourite form of self torture.....oh be still my beating heart.

Homemade airship prang closes highway in Oklahoma

Legality's effects on reality.

Surely you know that when a bureaucrat makes marks on paper, the entire makeup of the universe alters to support his will....That's why booze and ciggies as legal and taxable drugs are much safer than mary jane or anything else that's banned.....yet for a period in US history booze was amazingly dangerous.

Humans really are bell-ends.

Tux, cos sooner or later Balmer will get Linux banned, at which point it'll become more dangerous than a starving timber wolf with a peeled habenjero up it's ringpiece.

Virgin Media in 'which Whitchurch' whoopsie

@JustMathew

Don't worry about it mate, two Cardiffs would more or less equal my whole country. I love how the engerlanders bash the Welsh Scots and N.Oirish. They crow on the rare occassions that we don't stuff them at football, despite them having at least 10 times the population base that any of the other home nations (and if you look at their league, they only use foreign players cos none of the engerlish can play).

Besides they may have flooded your valleys, but they are so immensly daft that they don't NEED some bunch of oppressive foreign idiots to flood their part of the world....nope THEY build houses in water meadows and flood-plains, then cry about getting flooded.

/me drops trousers, yells something incomprehensible (save for what sounds like "inglissbassads" and bids farewell.

PS: I'm willing to accept that some areas of engerland far far away from London may be populated with humans, but basically I think we should cut around the M25, throw the worthless slag from the middle into the atlantic, flood the hole, and stock it with fish.

PPS: they gave my whole country one postcode, based on the capital city.

O2 just can't keep it up

Not just jesusphone victims affected.

Their mobile broadband was acting up over the weekend too, with all attempts to connect crapping out as soon as the modem "dialled".

It came back about 0300 or 0400 on sat, slow and horrid. Was also slow and horrid last night.

I had to force DNS servers on it as well months ago as theirs are utterly utterly useless.

Tux, cos he's the main penguin.

Vulture Central plans Brit-Yank dictionary

Why

I cannot see why anyone should make an effort to think down to the level of these idiots, what's next, a picture version? a scratch and version?

Sod that, if you can't read Engerlish, then use a translator to translate it to some language you DO speak.

Never heard the like of it, providing assitance for people who spell like 4 year olds is fine if you're a special needs school, but not an IT webshite.

Odd though that they often elect the MOST poorly educated of their number......must be to make the rest of them feel better.

AT&T may have influenced American Idol final vote

It's finally come to this then......

I always knew I'd reach this point, but never expected it so soon. Nevertheless I must ask.......

The other shows listed at the end of the article......are they real or made up?

(coat cos it's a genuine question that I feel may require a swift exit)

Torture case against Boeing subsidiary resuscitated

@ miami mickey taker

Well, I for one was not aware that every last person seized and tortured in these operations was subsequently found guilty in a court of law. In fact I was under the impression that the powers that be, did everything in their power and a few things that were not, to avoid any of these cases getting a normal fair trial.

And the beauty of it is, that while the innocents are getting tortured, your actual terrorist scumbags are still out there, still plotting, and still probably on the CIA's payroll.

Web 0.2 archivists save Geocities from deletion

Poor Emulation

only 3/10 for the Geoshitties impersonation.

After all, for it to be accurate, clicking the story title should bring up nothing but a "geocities page not found".

Gotta wonder how many 404's they've archived.

US judge bars teen 'sexting' charges

Can't get my head round this.

Surely a paedo, is an ADULT who seeks secual encounters with minors? If a minor seeking a sexual encounter with another minor (including sending smutty pics) is also a paedo, then surely each and every one of us is a kiddie-fiddler. There is no statue of limitations on such offenses, and I for one have spent an enormouse amount of time with my hands inside the bras and panties of 14 and 15 year old girls..........WHEN I WAS 14 or 15. I suppose I should offer my name up to some sort of register or something.

The point of child porn laws is to prevent adults from exploiting and hurting children, they do not apply when the "perverse" party is the same age as their ahem.."prey".

And yes.....the fact that this guy gets all flushed and hard at the sight of wee girls in the swimming cossie is severely terrifying. Actually maybe he should visit the UK where whaqui jacqui and her thought crime law would DEFINITELY screw him over......after all under that if you get a stiffie on the bus, you get labelled as a motophile or something

Balmer cos he's the only person who could out double think the judge.

Geo-located malware appears over the horizon

No fear

A huge dirty bomb has exploded in a tiny and insignificant town in N. Ireland. Yeah, believable. Doubly so since mad middle eastern types wont attack their "mates" in the local terrorists. Money from America > Irish Terrorists > Middle eastern terrorists (who use it to attack US interests) , the world has a poetic sheen to it some days.

And apart from our local godtards, NI must be the safest place on the planet.

Always Tux.

Conspiracy theories fly around Norton forum 'Pifts' purge

I'd rather...........

...............have a virus than Norton, the virus does less damage to your system, and is easier to remove with reputable tools. Always good to see a spanner in the works of the MS/Symantec protection racket.

Amusing to see Symantec talking about scareware isn't it.

Tux, cos he don't need no stinkin' anti-malware malware.

OcUK puts £10K bounty on the heads of DDoS varmints

WOW

Had nothing but exceptional service from them for the last 3 years, which involves the building of at least 10 machines. Not noticed any racism on their forums, or from the extremely pleasant ASIAN customer service chap I last spoke to. I can only assume that those making the negative comments work for ebuyer.

Forums posts seeking support were once deleted, because they are useless as the support staff do not read the fora. This has changed since the introduction of the dedicated support forum.

As for "hacker site"....building a PC is hacking, you MS-fed fucktard....has billie gates confused your limited brain by trying to mislead the world into thinking cracker=hacker..

They also have a Linux forum.

OCUK forever!!!!!!

Beeb names new Doctor Who

Well at least.......

.......He seems a bit mental, always a good start.

I had my heart set on a thoroughly miserable old git this time round :(

There's also the chance he will suffer Peter Davidson Syndrome. Look back at PD's term and he was actually quite good, but at the time, I and every other rational (ahem) human being hated his guts, basically because he wasn't Tom Baker. DT's been rather excellent at times (not least beacuse he's actually a bit of a whovian), so this guy may just be hated for not being DT.

The hair HAS to go though.

El Reg in Street View drive-by snooping

Belfast avoidance

They seem to be avoiding the "compicated" bit of the UK, y'know, N.Ireland. Don't see any sightings logged there.

Either.........

A. This is another of those "UK" things that ends with "filthy paddies not welcome" (which only annoys me because I had to sit through the advert BEFORE being given the old "no dogs, no blacks, no irish" line......If I can't have your product, please can I have 40 seconds of Formula1 back?)

or.

B. They like their knees they way they are, and have correctly deduced that taking a picture of Big Jamsie's Stolen Goods and Cut-Price Firearms Emporium, might not be the smartest thing to do.

Flames, cos that's how the snoopmobile will end up if it DOES pay old BellShaft a visit.

Shiny phones lead to rash of rash

Errrrm, no

PROLONGED contact against SWEATY skin.

Also, fingertips are a whole lot less prone to such reactions. I play bass, the strings of which contain nickel, but never have a finger rash. However, a nickel alloy watch backplate will bring my wrist out in lumps in no time.

Maybe if someone held coins in their sweaty mitts all day, they would get a reaction (in the palms more likely)

Artist to smoke Cobain's ashes

Never mind the spellink flaims!

Smoking: The act of inhaling the gaseous products of combustion.

Ash:substance which remains after combustion.

Is anyone else seeing a problem here?

Tried lighting up the contents of your ashtray recently? Tried emptying the ash pan from your open fire back into the grate and re-lighting it?

(never mind that the ash in this case was produced at several thousand degrees, and will be "smoked" at a coupe of hundred.

When I take oever, it's up against the wall for anyone with a lower IQ than a poodle.

Paris: because according to this page from Wikipedia dated 2053, that's fallen into a web 6.0 timewarp......

Say hi to Haumea - our fifth dwarf planet

@Anton

Beat me to it.

Then again....

"Arthur Clarke was right" as a headine is like......

"Schumacher wins"

"American President makes spectacular cock-up"

"England score 15 won goals, fans call for manager to be sacked"

"Water is wet, the sky is blue"

EFF sues Dubya over warrantless surveillance

@AC

I shall sleep a little better, knowing people like you still exist in Jesusland.

And sooner or later, someone will post "If you've nothing to hide, you have nothing to fear".....well, when they do, could they please post......

1. Their full address.

2. The school their children attend.

3. Their REAL earnings for last year.

4. The fastest they have ever driven on a public road.

5. Their bank and credit card details, if poss (it's OK I'm with the government, honest I am".

Flames because:

"Wanted one large handbasket, approx planet sized, must be heat resistant, for one way trip"