* Posts by Graeme Hayes

17 posts • joined 9 Aug 2008

Imprisoned Norwegian mass murderer says PlayStation 2 is 'KILLING HIM'

Graeme Hayes
Facepalm

Hell?

This f*ckwit doesn't know what hell is.

I have a five year old who thinks that Spongebob Squarepants is the greatest cartoon ever, that "Gangnam Style" needs to be repeated incessantly at EVERY child's birthday party and that One Direction are the best band in the world.

I'd happily swap his "hell" for mine, any day of the week.

Especially now, "Gangnam Style" has just come on again.....................for the eighth time in a row.

Sony Xperia Z Ultra: The quad-core 2.2GHz MEGA SCREEN PHONDLESLAB

Graeme Hayes

Re: I wonder

I've had my Z Ultra for nearly a month now and no, it does not get over warm.

Oprah Winfrey too late to save Microsoft's Windows 8

Graeme Hayes
Unhappy

Re: actually quite a good os underneath...

It can be as good as it wants to be "under the bonnet" but everyone, me included, will use (or not) based on what the surface (sic!) looks like...........

Graeme Hayes
Thumb Down

Windows 8

As an IT professional (?) with over 20 years experience, I can safely say that Windows 8 is the singularly most hideous piece of software I have ever used !!

Reg readers serve up bacon sarnie amuse-bouche

Graeme Hayes
Thumb Down

Re: Is there any other kind

Mushroom ketchup is freely available where I am.........

And it tastes as bad as it sounds !!

Graeme Hayes
Go

Re: Please Stop !!

As to the first question.....no comment. But salvation is half an hour away across The Causeway.

And for the second question, there are plans afoot !!

Graeme Hayes
Stop

Please Stop !!

I live in a land where pork products are strictly verboten. Please cease and desist this talk of bacon butties with immediate effect. My mouth is watering and I can't sample the wares !!

By the way, the best bacon buttie is made with nice thick local smoked back bacon, Warburton's Breakfast Loaf, butter and a smidgin of Heinz tomato ketchup............

iPhone 4S: Our *hit list

Graeme Hayes
Facepalm

Restrictions List

I'd like to see more apps in the "Restrictions" list. Like that annoying Newsstand, Stocks - I not rich enough to have any, Weather - I just look out the window, Contacts - duplicated with the phone app and Game Center - I'm a miserable old git and I don't do games.

Stealth hovercraft armada poised to invade South Korea

Graeme Hayes
Happy

Nork

Nork - what a crackin' name for a military base. Much better than the unimaginative names the Brits come with !!

W**k-O-Meter

Graeme Hayes
Thumb Up

I need a new phone now !!

I'll go and get me one of them Handroid phones !!

Google boss: 'Creeped out by Street View? Just move'

Graeme Hayes
Big Brother

What An Arrogant Prat.....

Title says it all.........

iPhone app tagged as terror tool

Graeme Hayes
Badgers

I Be Scared......

I have Pinkfroot's Ship Finder on my iPhone, does this mean I have to hire a midget submarine laden with C4 to attack the merchant fleet.....??

Ten free apps to install on every new Mac

Graeme Hayes

Monolingual......

Great idea but it completely screwed my MacBook. Luckily, I had a backup of the data and it only took a short while to undo the damage.

Profs: Sex with oldies or youngsters will give you the clap

Graeme Hayes
Jobs Horns

Having VD Is Nothing To Clap About

Round of applause for the bloke who found this out. I's assuming that extensive field tests were undertaken? I'd have volunteered if asked..... I'm eight years older than my wife, so my question is...Who actually gets the clap? Is it me as the older partner or her as the younger member of the team. My vote is that the newbie gets it !!

You did what? The trials of supporting remote users

Graeme Hayes
IT Angle

Users - Don'tya Just Luv 'Em?

I work abroad and we support users using several languages and have too many ditties to count. However, two stand out......

Due to the vagaries of the local infrastructure, we often have to use a device called a "Stac", which is a voltage convertor and stabiliser. We had one user log a call for us to supply a Stac for use with his electric pencil sharpener.

On another occasion, one of my local colleagues fell foul of the language barrier and logged a call on behalf of a user who apparently wanted "cretin people" removed from the e-mail address book.

The IT Crowd goes west

Graeme Hayes
Paris Hilton

Does ANYONE Know It's A Comedy...?

Lucky me, I've been unlucky enough to catch a few glimpses of this programme out here in Saudi Arabia. I didn't realise it was a comedy until I read your article..............

Man buys $1,000 worth of iPhone pixels by accident

Graeme Hayes

There's One Word To Describe This Bloke

But my Mum won't let me use it.......

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