Posts by Phil Tanner

Bulgarians cop an eyeful of Penthouse billboard filth

It's only obscene

If you know already what it's meant to represent and see that. Otherwise it's just an eye. So surely, the obscenity is in the eye of the beholder, not the advert??

Trojan poses as Adobe update utility

That's what I did...

Then installed Evince to cope with all the PDF documents that everyone insists on sending me. Faster, smaller and open source to boot. Lubberly.

Historian slams 'absolutely crazy' UK time zone

Split it down the middle...

Always wondered why we can't just move the clock back by half an hour (or forward by half an hour in the spring) and then just have done with it. All this faffing about twice a year could be put to bed once and for all...

Boffins: Bebo interstellar spam aliens don't exist after all

I for one...

Welcome our ....

Oh. Maybe not.

I'll get mi coat...

Judge Dredd smartshell shotguns to hit Iraq in '09

Bootnotes

Is it only me that gets really peev'd having to click to the last page of the article and then back again to read the bootnotes?

If you're going to split the articles across pages, at least have the decency to put each bootnote at the bottom of the page that mentions it.

Or better still, add a tag with a title argument around your bootnote *'s that has the content in it.

/rant

Melamine, poisons and the misappliance of science

So it's just me then

That sees a "contains protein 160-300 percent" as a clear case of bullshit? I mean, I understand how salami can contain 110% pork (weight of dried salami significantly under weight of hydrated flesh)... But a powder that's 300% protein...

Eh?

Police drop BT-Phorm probe

Lack of criminal intent

Surely that's the difference between "manslaughter" and "murder" - one is unintentional and the other isn't... But if I'm guilty of manslaughter I still go to court and get tried for it - so it's still a crime, no?

Reg readers rage at comment icon outrage

Flying Spagetti Monster?

What about a portrayal of His Noodly Appendage for those lovely Creationism stories - I know we could use the Jolly Roger, but really - we need a decent FSM :D

Nuke-nobbling US laser jumbo fires test beams

@Charles

I had presumed that there was some form of targeting system on board the aircraft (like the Apache's canon) rather than it just facing forward along the plane's axis (like the A10's)... I'd also presumed that it was some form of revolving reflector like a cheap disco decoration...

A lot of presumptions, I know, but how else can they change the destination of the beam? And if they can find a material to reflect the beam for the full length of the firing at point blank range, then surely a coating could be found to deflect the remainder of the beam after several kilometres of atmosphere has taken it's toll upon it?

Helicopter icon coz it'll be the last you'll see of them - soon they'll all be shiny :D

I'm no expert but...

Wouldn't North Korea^W^W any enemy nation simply stop painting their ICBM's and polish them up to a lovely mirror shine instead to foil this plan? I mean, wouldn't the lasers simply then bounce off & fry some poor yak farmer or camel herder instead of making the satisfying "Kaboom!" at this point?

Flame icon to signify the fate of poor shepherd

Prototype orbital seaplane in Texan blimp-base blast

@Jon Double Nice

Exactly my thoughts on the matter, until I recalled some vague memory of a technical difference between a blimp and a barrage balloon (thanks MikeG - I couldn't remember for the life of me what they were called!) and presumed they were talking about the old WWI trick of dropping hand-held bombs out the sides of aircraft at them there dastardly Jerries...

7-year-old faces M&S Inquisition

@Reminds me of my loan at Harvey Norman

I had the same thing with Halifax bank when they rang me.

"Can I speak to Mr Tanner please"

"Speaking"

"Can you confirm your mothers maiden name please"

"Once you confirm my account number to me"

"I can't give out that information until I've confirmed who you are sir..."

"I won't confirm any personal details until I know you're who you say you are..."

Round and round it went until they hung up on me.

2 months later they rang back, and have obviously changed their policies... I had

"Hello Mr Tanner, can you confirm your identity please? Your postcode is W1B 5 - can you tell me the last 2 digits please?"

Similar situation continued for 3 or 4 questions - a nice solution all round I thought.

Common sense win - for once.

Lawsuit spells trouble for Facebook's Scrabulous

More sales?

What they're perhaps missing here is that I know at least 5 people personally who have, as a direct result of playing Scrabulous on Facebook, gone out and purchased Scrabble boards to play with family & friends IRL.

It would be very interesting to see the sales trends before and since Scrabulous launched - although Hasbro marketeers would no doubt say something along the lines of "Scrabble was already on a resurgance and Scrabulous has simply taken sales away from what would have been an almost atmospheric rise in sales".

Muppets.