Posts by Alex Barwell

Microsoft backs 'Bing' with big ad push

Maybe

Can someone in open source land come up with a rival and give it the equally fitting name of Bada...

Hitler ordered Luftwaffe to spare Blackpool

Bastard

The guy really was trying to f**k us up

Barack Obama will be president

Someone who will be looking for a grassy Knoll

Hmm, in the pic chosen is Sarah Pailin winking, or is that a permanent squint from looking through the telescopic sights of her rifle collection. Not sure, do you need sights on an elephant gun?

Tech gadgetry brings about pet-o-geddon

Hardware fault?

With tamagochis and whatever, the mental capacity of the average user, the problem is that pets have failed to remain current. I can't remember the last time I saw a USB-equipped guinea pig...Our senile old cat gets on the computer a lot more than my mum does. Not that it helps any.

There is quite an anti-apple spirit in this thread.

Remember, an apple a day keeps the doctor away - 'cos he only uses PCs.

As for the toy-shitting dog with blue piss - thats fucking great! just take him to someone else's house if he is looking at all desparate - that so-so friend with the expensive white rug

Dell preps software de-dupe, SSD launches

Nothing new here

Most Dell encounters I've had would include the sentiment 'bad news' as they do get bought as 'cost effective' (you know - CHEAP) and have a history of grief - high end workstations grenading themselves, top end model laptop running like a, well, very slow, stupid thing, servers turning up late and mis-spec'ed, raid controller deaths etc and WHAT THE F**K were those crappy plastic flaps covering the front USB sockets! The ones that got smashed off within weeks? We now have a sea of HP DLs, XWs and DCs and it all works nicely, but for some poorly judged desktop builds, but that is another story.

Booze and breasts combined, finally

Wahey!!!!!!

Beer jugs!!! Not so good for lager drinkers as it would end up flatter and warmer than the love-interest in question. Terrible scenario though if the link to the other half got blocked/crimped then you've got a serious imbalance that might need re-adjusting manually. BTW Rick, most of our fridges probably come from china or korea now. The student trick of keeping milk cool in digs by hanging it out the window best not translated to this creation...

Fart-lighting youth in petrol can mishap

Hot stuff

Dear Adnim - I think I went to school with you. Did the eyebrows grow back OK? It was your own fault as I recall.

Got to admit this is natural selection at its best, almost, the fact the dick is still breathing is the flaw. Probably didn't talk much before the incident as he wouldn't have the brainpower to talk and keep on breathing anyway.

Otherwise, there must be easier ways of getting a back-sack-and-crack waxing done on the cheap. Wait until dipshit has to start shaving - what will he use for aftershave?

Paris, 'cos she has even more experience of waxing than the karate kid (geddit?)

Sats blunder firm sacked

Mr Cheese right on the money

Yep, they royaly stuffed up in the first of five years but still walk away with more than two years worth of money, rather than a size 12 winkle-picker up the jacksy (shoe, not chinese immigrant!). Yet again proof we are all collectively in the wrong job for money. Maybe something bad will happen to the morons responsible for this fantastic piece of negotiation. Alternatively they can employ me for a job I'm wholly incapable of carrying out and they can pay me a mere £1million a year, £2million if they want to get rid of me again.

Apple is Fisher-Price of sound quality, says Neil Young

Mixed feelings

Hate his music with a passion, but agree with his comments. High sample rates if you really do have certain doggy attributes (No, not being able to lick those...) but really the problem is an excessive shift to quantity over quality. Capacity should be much higher now with ML codecs - what would you pay for either 80GB disk or 8GB flash now?

BTW, just because something has a big 'PRO' badge on it (like some of the kit mentioned previously) doesn't make it so - often the reverse

:)