* Posts by Simon

27 publicly visible posts • joined 3 Jul 2008

Gordon 'to sacky' Wacky Jacqui


Good and bad...

.... YAY! She's going... hopefully...

Noooooooo - what muppet will take her place...????

Welsh mum amazed by Marmite Messiah

Jobs Horns

Love or Hate???

So this was written by a biased marmite hater... damn you! Damn you all to brown sticky goo hell....

iPhone users to walk and read at same time


iPhone record

Well technically it **can** record video. Pretty well in fact. Its just that it comes in the form on a non-supported *cough* jail broken *cough* application. 30fps if IIRC after seeing on a mates iPhone...

Asda clamps down on killer teaspoons


Alan Rickman

Wasnt it he that so eloquently put in "Robin Hood - Prince of Thieves"...

"I want to dig your heart out with a spoon!!!!"

"Why a spoon cousin? Why not a knife or an axe"

"Because its dull you twit... it will hurt more"

Job done!

Virgin Media switches to Gmail


Ah that was sneaky!

I like the "out of the box" thinking (damn I hate management cra@p expressions like that...) of Virgin Media of how to get round and make as low cost as possible of the new EU regulation to store everyones emails for 12 months! Get someone else to do it. Clever... but I wonder how Gmail will play ball with that one (dammit another rubbish saying!)

At least they did choose a half decent platform, I personally like Gmail (but of course many dont).

So now all VirgMed need to do is store ip versus website calls and they're done.

Sneaky, but clever, you cant deny that!

Wacky Jacqui spanked by husband


Freedom of Information....

Oh hang on... let me get this right, WE paid for the TV package and the 2 vinegar-stroke inducing fiddle flicks, under the Freedom of Information Act are we legally entitled to find out what the fudge it actually was?

The fact that this kind of expense is allowed, not to mention 2nd homes and everything else in their lives, sickens me. There should be an independant 3rd party to manage and regulate at least the financial side of the government, that or this stuff gets made to be public knowledge by default and NOTHING can be hidden.


WAG sues CPW for phone pic nick


This is sometimes funny but often scars you for life...

Having worked in a retail PC shop (not Pissy World but an independant one thank goodness!!) shop having seen what people leave on their hard drives when they bring them in for repair, upgrade or, quite often, for a "spring clean" this is no suprise but it does kind of say "how stupid are you??"

Now and again, pics/videos we amusing, sometimes private but these ones were often nasty and I wish I hadnt seen them, but its like watching a train smash, you cant turn away... I cant unsee that stuff <shudder>

Hehehe also reminds me of a woman bringing in the pc her and her hubby uses because it was slow. We cleaned it up and got rid of all 14,000 odd peices of malware, trackers etc. When she asked me what was wrong and I had to, legally, tell her that they had gotten on there from "unscrupulous websites of an adult nature" her face turned to thunder... none for the husband for a while. I didnt tell her that it involved donkeys though, thankfully she didnt ask specific enough questions!

Glasses cos I wish I had some auto-censoring ones sometimes.... <shudder again>

Street View captures traditional British Christmas


Gotta love the auto-blurr technology...

that blurs his hand and not his head... nice work!

The patch on the pavement next to the dude blowing chunks could be either pee or puke... note to self - dont go there...




If you go to the default street view location for that road and turn round to the right there is a brunette next to the pub, if you go down the road toward the guy emptying his stomach she appears again! Oh the fun!!!

iPhone 3.0 adds cut-and-paste, search, new dev toys

Thumb Up

But looks like most people missed one of the final goodies!

In the Q&A section at the end of the presentation they also mentioned that tethering to a laptop/netbook/whatever was also being implemented but I expect they need to get the comms providers to sort something out on this. Also MMS isnt included in the O2 bundle so I wonder how the propose to include it.... fun fun fun!

Oz driver pulled with todger in pasta sauce jar


a Jack Russell Terrier!??

Point... lol....

Teen hacker confesses three-year crime spree

Paris Hilton

...and compared to Mr KcKinnons "crimes"

So hang on this kid has stolen money from real people, caused situations that could have KILLED people (trigger happy or accidental shooting in one of the SWAT callouts?) damaged systems, stolen stuff from companies and individuals for personal gain and really screwed some ISP's over (who I hope have learned from the experience and "hardened the f*ck up!")

So the only thing he didnt do was snoop into any military or government systems (or wasnt caught, or hasnt said about it) - yet he gets 11 months then a clean slate for causing real and substancial damage thats provable. So Gary McKinnon apparently didnt cause and direct damage (I suspect the computers/systems he is being accused of damaging were actually taken off line to plug the hole that he used to get in...) is up for being deported and then whacked a 25 year plus sentence on him? Did he gain anything from this!? Oh yeah, remember there are no terrorists inside Americas borders, just criminals.

Sheesh! I give up....

Paris - cos even she got a short sentence inside that should have been longer...

Blundering workmen cut major Docklands fibre


Heheh I can hear the conversation now...

"Hey Steve, I gotta bloody tough tree root here"

"Then get the pick axe on it Jo"



(yeah ok, it may not have made a short circuit sound but for comic strip effect....)

Mines the one with the detailed map of cable, pipes and anything else important in the pocket.

IP addresses in server logs not personal data: Ruling


I partly agree...

... with the ruling but a few points to make.

1 - like BT and the Phorm debacle an ISP can pretty much, without legal backing, use this type of data for other uses.

2 - what and internal marketing that the ISP may do i.e. profile their customers

3 - Dyanmic IPs, in my experience, dont necessarily change each time you connect, especially with the advent of home broadband where the router at the punters location connects to the ISP and keeps the connection live for days/weeks/months. (Mine is slightly different cos I turn mine off when I am not using it to make sure that no-one can jump onto my WiFi, WEP/WAP/Whatever I dont trust it - paranoid? Yes....) So what to do with thes "semi-static" IP's?

4 - Illegal gaining of this information is highly possible. Without adequate precautions by the ISP, anyone into a bit of industrial esponage or just wanting to make a quick buck could put a LOT of info on a usb key (or similar)

Apart from that, I agree with the ruling and see it as, generally, fair. If the ISP wants to track things like "dont massively download on your 'unlimited' package" or "dont download illegal stuff" then that is up to them as long as its defined nicely in their T&C's and the punter can choose to be bound by those rules or not - as should be the notification that this info IS stored and WILL NOT be used for anything else blah blah blah. Dont try and hide it, that will just rile people. If you make it clear people can make the choice if they want to live with it or not, you may be suprised!

Meh.... whatever!

Aliens cos like big brother... they are watching us!

EA in Spore DRM climbdown

Gates Horns

Now how about other titles???

Seeming there is no mention of the DRM nor its underhand installation onto your computer (that I could find in the ULA) AND that they have admitted that this isnt necessarily the best way to stop pirates but instead to really piss off legit customers are they going to release similar "patches" for other SECUROM/DRM titles. E.g. Crysis Warhead please?

I (and I am sure lots of other people) will be upgrading their machines, processors, GFX cards to play this new lump of eye candy and seeming there doesnt seem to be much info on what would trigger one of your 3 activations people could get caught out from just trying to play the game at its best... surely not fair and now they have climbed down with Spore lets put pressure on them to do the same for existing and future games.

These new "rules" are better, but not perfect. They should be MUCH more open with the restrictions they put on and not try and hide them... come on, you know use "IT Professionals" better than that! We will find out. Present us with an obstacle and someone will find a way around it... usually within a day....

Devil Bill cos of the Vista license activation controversy that is/was similar.

Police drop BT-Phorm probe

Black Helicopters

So does this mean...

... I know that he is being done under US law but if it was in the UK does it mean that that Scottish hacker dude that broke into the US military as long as he proves there was no "criminal intent" that he would be let off? Hmmmmmmm numpties, all of them, retards...

iPod Touch, Nano disassemblies reveal surprises


@Michael and Giles...

Michael - my 3G jesus phone has Bluetooth but its not that great... not managed to connect it to much as yet. New firmware out Friday tho that I am hoping will improve that (plus speed in the contacts list and notes applications!)

Giles - the Nike+ also only records footfalls/number of steps. But it uses a preset average step distance and number of steps per second to work out speed and distance (you can configure these by running a set distance on a treadmill and also doing it walking as the Nike+ is able to tell if you are walking/running depending on a steps/second threshold I presume). So anything with an accelerometer and the relevant program calculating these things could do the same.

Pretty nifty though either way and I used teh Nike+ a lot when I had a nano... I just wish I could plug it into my iPhone to do the same, or an app is developed... or I will just get a cheap 2gig old nano to go running with (probably safer too in case I dropped it/came out of the arm holder)

Garmin forerunner is a great tool, for the serious runner or if you got some spare cash. The nike+ is only £20 (and you dont need to buy special trainers, just tuck the unit into a small bag and tuck it under your laces...) and for me it was pretty accurate. Fun fun fun...

BT's Mayfair exchange downed by burglary


Oh well..

... there goes my companies DR link... raises an interesting question - where *is/was* BT's disaster recovery plan. Hmmmm none maybe? Oh the fun....

Aaaagh, there's a thumb in my USB port!

Thumb Up

Which one...

... is the fake thumb cos the one that ISNT stuck into the laptop looks in pretty bad shape. Is that Tippex™ on the nail???? Get some hand cream dude, gets rid of the dry, red sore skin... What? Don't worry we wont call you a sissy...

Thumbs up cos... well... it fits!

7-year-old faces M&S Inquisition


Changing Policies

I too like several people above have has *someone* call me from some company I may or may not have an account with asking for me to confirm details before they would speak to me.

I love that conversation "Hi this is BLAH, can you confirm your details for me?" I keep silent... "Sir?", "Yes?" I reply. "can you confirm details please?" silence....finally I pipe up with "confirmation means you need to quote the details you want me to verify" of course they used to come back with "cant give personal details out..." The stupidity of it used to make me laugh or fume...

However recently with a mobile phone company (I cant remember if it was O2 or Vodafone) when they asked me to confirm details as pretty much the first line in the conversation I retorted with "Sorry, I dont know who you are, can you give me some details of what you have to confirm who you are?" They were fine with this and said the first part of my PostCode.

I think them giving (part) details that would be pretty useless on its own is a good policy - thats not a breaking of DPA laws surely? I just wish more member of the Jo Public would insist on the 2 way verification... too many people just blurt it out at the first request.

Holiday text messages to cost less than 9p


Hang on....

... 9p a message is CHEAPER than what the standard text message rate on my (now old) Vodafone contract was... I recall it was 12p a message.

Not sure about the VAT. Maybe it was 9p plus VAT? Not sure...

So bring it on! Unless of course they will subsidise the foreign message rate by pumping up something on the home tarrif. Or whats stopping them charging a "once a day/week standing charge" that will be applied on the sending of the first message in that period? Anything stopping them doing that?

Erotic artist urges spanking for Jacqui Smith


Re: Good law, well-defined, end-of - Andrew..

.... Andrew Andrew Andrew.... tututut...

Whilst I agree with your definition of unacceptable things the law in question is more to do with the possibility that the picture in question could have been taken whilst causing someone harm. The grey area, for example, is pictures of someone in a light (or otherwise) BDSM scenario but the important part is that ALL PARTIES IN SAID PHOTO ARE CONSENTING to both the photo and the acts being portrayed. The holder of that photo would be breaking the law, not to mention that the people in the photo could be done for bodily harm etc... even if the people being "harmed" have no intention to prosecute, there are plenty of cases out there already on this one. The new law would add yet another layer to beat (pun intended) the "criminals" with.

Penguin cos you're not allowed to with him either....


Ah the complications and meanings...

What I like about this law is that you are perfectly legal to say watch a horror movie that contains scenes of mutilation or forced restraint for example SAW I, II, III, IV etc.... but you cannot take a still from said movie and be in posession of it on your computer or in printed format (ignoring copyright issues obviously...)

Lovely, I see this law and another to give a carte blanche to pin something on pretty much everyone.

Anyone thinking of emmigrating?!?

voat - mines the one with a copy of Bizzare in the pocket (cos this law would probably outlaw some of the stuff in there too)...

Game sharer gets £16K fine


Hang on, hang on just a minute!!!

"Convicted" on meagre suspicion of filesharing!!!????

I thought proof beyond reasonable doubt or even a majority vote had to be given?? Unless of course the people proved the traffic to certain IP and the IP was confirmed to be that persons... or that the game/filesharing tool etc had been found on the PC or summat?

I dont see how it could have been done on just suspicion.

Also gotta LOVE the "pay £300 or get sued" approach, its then up Joe Public to prove his innocence once again. I love how many companies are getting in on this act... wont be long before one of them (and I am sure its happened already) just issues these warnings to get people to pay up. Oh yeah... they have... tv licensing...

Mines the one with the accompanying Bermuda shorts cos I am emmigrating....

iPhone 3G not compatible with existing accessories


But... how come then that....

... Apples Universal Dock (the one that works with all the other older devices, has a remote etc) works with the new iPhone 3G (as long as you get the little plastic inserts to make it sit snugly)?????

UK data watchdog gives Google spycar fleet the greenlight


Oh the fun!!

If you wanted to move to some street you could use Street view to see what the parking situation is like, is it a pleasant looking area... will your neighbours be fit enough make you smile in the morning, the blurry faces will be ok if you enjoy a few too many beers as they will be recognisable from the streetview pictures then!

Goggles for google beer goggles....

Virgin warns 800 punters for file-sharing


Wow? Really??

This is akin to the TV Licensing of accusation of breaking the law before actually checking whether you have or not. A sign of the future?

Then again, even if he DID download said Wino song it was probably at 2kbps due to VM's throttling techniques. I am a VM customer and even though I like the service they give but HATE the customer service (last week I had my broadband disconnected due to an unpaid £49 bill even though my account was £49 in CREDIT, they had two accounts for me apparently but I only have one service from them... go figure) they did seem to provide me with a wireless router preconfigured with ok security and with username/password of the router different to the routers default. So if someone did hijack that dudes wireless then Virgin may be using rubbish key generation algorithms (sound familiar??) Ho hum... I will go back to downloading now, talking on El Reg is taking too much bandwidth...