* Posts by the Jim bloke

788 posts • joined 18 Apr 2007


Exoskeletons-as-a-service offered as helping hand to warehouse workers exhausted by pandemic

the Jim bloke Silver badge

if a user becomes injured while wearing one

will it be because .. it's holding them wrong?

As Uncle Sam flies spy drones over protest-packed cities, Homeland Security asks the public if that's a good idea

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Big Brother

Re: I submitted my comment

the US never practiced fascism as a political system

Which is why the evil clown is doing so badly.

Lack of practice.

Give Let him take a few more years of ruining the country, and he will be so much better at it.

Better than anyone else ever.

Amazon declined to sell a book so Elon Musk called for it to be broken up

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Re: Amazon choosing to publish / not publish seems like a no-win situation

In the long ruin, ....

yep, I think auto correct has nailed that one.

when I was young, I thought it would be wonderful to live forever, and medical science would advance to eventually bring humanity immortality.

Now, I am, if not wiser, at least hopefully less stupid, and I am relieved that all of this eventually will be someone elses problem.

Galaxy S20 security is already old hat as Samsung launches new safety silicon

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How many failed login attempts

..before it explode in a ball of flame?

Samsung have some prior art here

As Brit cyber-spies drop 'whitelist' and 'blacklist', tech boss says: If you’re thinking about getting in touch saying this is political correctness gone mad, don’t bother

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This is just a preliminary step

The ultimate goal is to remove the "escape" key, with its implications of freedom and choice, from keyboards and user interfaces.

There is no escape

There are no other choices

you will take what you are given

your happiness is not required

click "Ok", "Cancel", or "X" to install

Britain has no idea how close it came to ATMs flooding the streets with free money thanks to some crap code, 1970s style

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When I was a youth, they introduced the XPT express passenger trains, relatively high speed trains on rural lines. From memory, they were wiping out cars at level crossings every month or 2.

Lars Ulrich makes veiled threats of another Metallica album during web chat with Salesforce CEO Marc Benioff

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The Sony Effect

SWMBO describes the process as the Sony Effect, where a good musician or group signs up with a major label ... and stops making good music

Success XOR Good

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Black Metal

is now the catch-all for anti or non-christian metal, which makes it the most broad and welcoming category of them all.

Not just the pimply adolescents claiming to have a special relationship with Satan in a desperate attempt to impress girls, but also various pagan nationalist re-creationists, new age spiritualists, groups protesting the "Christian Patriarchy" and somehow, a lot of prog-rock seems to be hiding out in the Black Metal box as well.

Florida man might just stick it to HP for injecting sneaky DRM update into his printers that rejected non-HP ink

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Re: Florida man...

The hero of our times...

Australian contact-tracing app leaks telling info and increases chances of third-party tracking, say security folks

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The publicly acknowledged privacy concern

is the database being hosted by Amazon.

So the Australian government has denied itself access to all the data, but the Americans can grab whatever they feel like (something they have history of)

Whenever a journalist asks about this, ...

next question..

We're in a timeline where Dettol maker has to beg folks not to inject cleaning fluid into their veins. Thanks, Trump

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Re: Injecting sanitizer, and other tales..

If its being said, publicly and to mass media, by the head of state of one of the most powerful nations on earth - its serious. If he doesnt understand that - its even more serious.

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Time to re ignite the "Make America Great Again" campaign

Only this time the logo is a boot kicking an orange clown..

Problem is that people who voted for trump arent going to admit how completely they fucked up, so they will double down and insist he is a misunderstood genius..

They need a mechanism to allow them to save face, something that makes it not their fault..

(this only applies to the percentage that recognises there IS a problem, but I have some residual hope that not all of them are totally lost)

A campaign with the message that anyone who bought into Trumps Make America Great Again, should be asking for their money back, reframes the issue as them being conned and ripped off (not inaccurate), with the fantasy of financial reward, but would not be popular with any other political candidate as it brings up the spectre of penalties for failing to keep election promises.

Spyware maker NSO can't claim immunity, Facebook lawyers insist – it's time to face the music

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Big Brother

Re: Bollocks Bingo

two out of three..

Terrorism - whatever the government du jour defines.

Violent crime - again, the right to use violence is restricted to the state, so non-state endorsed violence is criminal.

Save lives - meh, maybe not.

Where the hell Huawei? It should be a bit easier to tell now the AppGallery has its first proper navigation app

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Here Wego crippled on android phones

Here We Go was my preferred navigation app for a few years, but recently, six months maybe, maybe longer, it has not been able to get a satellite fix for navigation.

just sits there with a message saying "waiting for GPS position" or somesuch. I have checked permissions, and re installed but no improvement. Meanwhile, Google maps is accessing GPS quite happily and presenting routes past highlighted advertisers and paying sponsors....

If I wasnt noticing an odour of rat, I would be requesting a COVID-19 test..

Elevating cost-cutting to a whole new level with million-dollar bar bills

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Re: Never saw a car crash into a computer

JCBs have made it all the way down under.

In an environment where average daytime temperatures are in the low 40s for half the year (not going to convert that to some horse-blood based approximation of a scale), JCBs are noteworthy for having really good heaters, and utter crap air conditioners. If only it would snow, they would be fantastic...

Royal Navy nuclear submarine captain rapped for letting crew throw shoreside BBQ party

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point of order

Use as chip wrapper BEFORE using as toilet paper, not after.

Also, usage as fire lighter prior to toilet paper usage may possibly result in (extremely) personal injury.

Lockdown endgame? There won't be one until the West figures out its approach to contact-tracing apps

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Re: The app will also record the proximity between the two devices

You are forgetting the other part of the proximity equation.


So you will need to hold your device against everyone elses, for 15 minutes. this is a valid justification for preserving the 2 person limit (dont know if that is a thing outside Oz, but its working for us, even with the inevitable non-compliance)

the Jim bloke Silver badge

likely to be implemented here in oz, so how to manage it?

My immediate response is that the app will go onto a burner phone (actually my work phone - because I am not managing security on that, therefore it is not given data I personally wish to keep private)

Being a work phone, it is old and cheap, so may not support the app - but that is up to my employer to deal with.

Where I work carrying personal phones is actually grounds for termination - so a pretty strong argument there...

It would require my carrying the work phone whilst not at work - a bad thing, but many bad things are now normal, and fairly trivial as such things go.

Losing access to the work phone, through loss of job or whatever reason, would require buying a cheapo replacement, but not a problem.

Mobile phones are basically now cheap commodity tech, all the "flagship model" hype from apple/samsung is just marketing excrement.

Not only is Zoom's strong end-to-end encryption not actually end-to-end, its encryption isn't even that strong

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Re: I don't use common definitions either

Mime artists are confined to working at home at present.

Home being a pit full of scorpions, with LEARN THE WORDS in bas relief lettering around the rim 5 metres above the floor.

Amazon says it fired a guy for breaking pandemic rules. Same guy who organized a staff protest over a lack of coronavirus protection

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Re: not believe unions are in the best interest of our customers or shareholders

one of the issues is when bad unions, political parties, and companies "merge" in order to compete against the giants - generally the law and human rights..

Unions had a positive effect back in the "good old days", but then again, politicians, companies, and the media also all seemed far less toxic and predatory than appears to be the current normal.

It is possible this could be the result of the loss of a "moral compass" thanks to organised religion thoroughly discrediting itself. Without an omniscient and incorruptible judge, Do what thou wilt -to maximise personal return- shall be the Whole of the Law

Infosys fires employee who Facebooked 'let's hold hands and share coronavirus'

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Re: Constitutional rights

Not from over there, but from what I've heard, your local laws - and constitutional rights, whatever those might be - stop a lot further back than just past the security screens.

Otherwise I mostly agree with your list ( with reservations concerning punctuation ), but would add that employee wages are also factored into the price in most advanced countries.

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Big Brother

Re: Idiots are everywhere

I sincerely doubt the employer was greatly concerned by the employee potentially endangering lives.

what does concern every employer, is damage to their image. The unforgivable sin in business, is embarrassing your boss, and they are zealous in punishing transgressors.

the Jim bloke Silver badge

Re: Ah, that old chestnut.

This is the exact same thing as yelling "Fire !" in a crowded theater.

Under current conditions, if anyone actually encounters a crowded theater, it is their moral duty to loudly cry "FIRE", to alert any nearby residents, immediately after locking and barricading the exits and dousing the offending building in petrol - or gasoline if you live in some banana republic with a clown despot..

the best response to that level of social irresponsibility is to nuke it from orbit, its the only way to be sure, but "kill it with fire" comes in as a respectable second.

People engaged in theatre crowding are dangerous subversives, politically suspect, disease ridden, and probably eat babies.

Astroboffin gets magnets stuck up his schnozz trying and failing to invent anti-face-touching coronavirus gizmo

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Re: smart people

bit of digging through archives.


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Re: smart people

sometime over the last couple of years, a pair of identical twins sent samples to one one of those DNA genealogy / ancestry sites, and got completely different results from each other.. So they definitely had the same mother, quite likely had the same father, but somehow diverged at the grandparents onwards...

Science is wonderful, especially when it is based on wearing white coats and using lots of big words..

Marriott Hotels hacked AGAIN: Two compromised employee logins abused to siphon off 5.2m guests' personal info

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I see those emails all the time..click here to unsubscibe

..no, actually I only see them when I look inside my spam folder..

The state of the web is that if anyone, claiming to be from anywhere, suggests you follow a link, treat it as an attempted mugging. If you personally know the sender, and expect the email - treat it like a possible hijacking instead, and verify.

Internet use up 40 per cent in San Francisco Bay Area – but you know what’s even higher? Yep, alcohol, weed use

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Alcohol is a Solvent

So use it to solve your problems

That awful moment when what you thought was a number 1 turned out to be a number 2

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When people start agreeing with me - its time to go back and check what I have said as it must be wrong..

Remember that clinical trial, promoted by President Trump, of a possible COVID-19 cure? So, so, so many questions...

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Re: The most important statement in the whole article.

I did not need that image.

The important thing to remember, is that the president is an arsehole and he tells lies.

Its tragic, but thats where the USA is today.

There's no Huawei a virus can stop us! 90% of our staff in China are already back at work, says CEO

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killer app

Forget about the ever increasing megapixel count - and lens count, on new model phones.

The first manufacturer to put a working temperature gun onto their phone is going to leave the competition for dead.

Crack police squad seeks help to flush out Australian toilet paper thieves

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and no one has mentioned the classic...

"Police have nothing to go on.."

Cops charge prankster who 'corona-coughed' on aged officer and had it filmed

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There's lots of stuff in Australia not being managed by IBM, even though they are being paid for it...

Theranos vampire lives on: Owner of failed blood-testing biz's patents sues maker of actual COVID-19-testing kit

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CoVID 19 Witch hunts

Somebody on one of these threads was wondering when the coronavirus witch hunts would be starting, with some early paranoia about people of Asian appearance, which didnt really take off, at least in the civilised world.

This looks like an excellent opportunity to set the pitchfork and flaming torch armed mobs after ... patent lawyers and their vile parasitic hives.

Another silver lining to emerge from a global catastrophe.

The Unihertz Atom XL: An iPhone SE-sized rugged phone that's also a walkie-talkie

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Outdoors phone with display you cant read outdoors

If the display is hard to read in England, what would it be like someplace that gets actual sunlight?

Health workers are top of phishers' target lists thanks to data value

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Should be clearly stated on the HR submission web page

Word and Excel format documents will be deleted, un-opened

with a description of what is an acceptable format. It may detract from their pretty corporate style statement but ...fuck their pretty corporate style statement...

Apple reopens stores in China as Middle Kingdom regains control of COVID-19 – after closing all its outlets in Italy

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Re: reasons not to close schools...

Perhaps I am overly cynical, but how many millenials - and government economists - are going to be seeing this as an opportunity to free up some real estate, and reduce the "Aging Population Crisis"?

Just go for a dinner at the Italian-Iranian food court, stop in for communion at your Greek Orthodox church, then go and give the grandparents a big sloppy hug...

Deliveroo UK adds 'Don't interact with the help' option for when ordering a burger

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Deliveroo did not respond to The Register

Good to see management are also complying with the non-interaction directive.

Leadership setting a good example, thats what we need.

As for Uber, I expect they will be paying their employees, a percentage of their normal rostered hours

..so zero...times, say 75%, .. times zero...

How's this for a JEDI mind trick? AWS waves hand, has Uncle Sam 'reconsider' $10bn contract award to Microsoft

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Re: "requiring that work on the contract pauses while the objection is considered."

but bob, the competition here is Microsoft..

..now you're feeling conflicted...

Microsoft's Bill Gates defrag is finally virtually complete: Billionaire quits board to double down on philanthropy

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Eradicating Polio from the population

You can hide, but you cant run...

..yes, yes, infernal flames await me..

IBM's outgoing boss Rometty awarded $20m+ in 2019 for growing revenue 0.1%

the Jim bloke Silver badge

Re: WTF?

Capitalism IS economic feudalism.

Capitalism is good for capitalists

Communism is good for Communists (party members)

Monarchy is good for Monarchs

Parliaments are good for for Parliamentarians

Tyrannies are good for tyrants.

Wouldnt know who democracies or socialism are good for, probably fiction writers.. I dont think there are any real ones out there.

If there's a bustle in your hedgerow, don't be alarmed now: Brexit tea towel says it'll just be the gigabit broadband

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Re: Optional?

hopefully all of them.

Oh, you meant the crayons,

Good luck pitching a tent on exoplanet WASP-76b, the bloody raindrops here are made out of molten iron

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So 640 light years away

and they can detect raindrops..

and to think they used to brag about reading newspaper headlines from orbit..

Pope tells his followers to log off for Lent

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Re: Dear Francis

They all DO have their own area - its called social media.

Its like a sump or drainage pond - it collects the low of intellect and keeps them out of the way. Unfortunately professional or commercial media have taken to grubbing around in there and dragging the crap out where everyone can see it. Obviously, its easier to sell stuff to stupid people, so commercial networks are all for promoting the 'social media experience"

Don't be fooled, experts warn, America's anti-child-abuse EARN IT Act could burn encryption to the ground

the Jim bloke Silver badge

Re: I don't have a problem with this

Not having a good alternative is not sufficient excuse to keep the thing you have.

At least you will get a new set of national dysfunctions, and be an international laughingstock for different reasons...

Who knows, eventually someone sane, competent and honest might make it through the system, just got to get the turnover high enough.

What a terrible result from this year's Super Bowl. Can you believe it? Awful. Yes, we're talking about the tech ads

the Jim bloke Silver badge

Re: "being FEMALE is some kind of HANDICAP"

The consensus is that ALL referees are completely ignorant of the game rules, therefore, women who tend to over-function and generally put more effort in (gender stereotype - deal with it), may possibly do a decent job and by doing so, overturn hundreds of years of tradition.

My personal view is that athletes in profit driven professional sports are manipulated into a state of prolonged mental adolescence, and just arent mature enough to deal with 'çhicks' in positions of authority - or even normal life. If we were talking about pet dogs, you would call it inadequate socialisation.

As with every generalisation about people, exceptions do apply.

Where do you draw the line? Escobar Inc doubles down on cut-price gold phone buying demographic with second pholdable

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So when will El Reg be given one for a hands-on review?

Probably with clear instructions on what they expect to see written, and clear implications of what will happen otherwise.

Artful prankster creates Google Maps traffic jams by walking a cartful of old phones around Berlin

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Big Brother

Re: Well done that man!

What we need is for thousands more people to do this in a coordinated event

Some time later, we find out google has moved into selling second hand Mobiles,


Is everything OK over there, Britain? Have you tried turning the UK off and on again? ISPs, financial orgs fall over in Freaky Friday of outages

the Jim bloke Silver badge

There'll be another month end next month. And one the month after. Etc.

but after Brexit, no one will have jobs...

So you locked your backups away for years, huh? Allow me to introduce my colleagues, Brute, Force and Ignorance

the Jim bloke Silver badge

2 rules of percussive maintenance

1. Any problem can be solved dealt with by a correctly sized hammer.

2. An axe is a very efficient variant of hammer

What pockets $129m profit a day, starts with M, and rhymes with 'wow, so soft'? Hint: Its cloud is going gangbusters

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Big Brother

is it "More" persons watching you use your computer?

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