Posts by Kenny Swan

eBay scammer gets four years in slammer

no title

@David Wilkinson. Ah, come on now. You've gone a bit mental there. Keep your head in the game, son.

Google streams data center pods to world+dog

My god...

I've never heard a more boring, monotone voice. I simply couldn't sit through it. I was very interested in this until I started watching it. They sucked any interest I had out me at industrial vacuum strength. Shame I couldn't finish watching it.

UK police bust lottery scam centre in Somerset

timmy123

We seem to be getting closer and closer to becoming the United States Of Britain every day. It's a little worrying. Sometimes I'm actually not that sorry I left the UK.

Google taps your IP address for Starbucks targeting

Right Google...

IP addresses are not identifiable information? Of course not. Unless an IP is spoofed, there's no way to find out who it's assigned to. Not unless there's some crazy scheme I don't know about where they can find out which ISP has that address range then call the ISP and ask which account had the IP assigned at the time...Actually, hold on...

I'll be in my bomb shelter and if anyone with a suit and dark glasses comes around, I'm not here, 'kay?

BBC Trust moots new licence laws to cope with net

Glad to be away from Britain...

When are they going to get rid of this antiquated and ridiculous 'TV Tax'? I don't understand how they can force you to pay for something you don't use. If you have Sky, surely the channels could be removed if you don't want to pay for them? They'll remove movies and sports access quick enough if you don't pay, why not reach an agreement with Sky and encode over Freeview and problem solved? Also, what about BBC America? Why do they get all the shows our license money funded and not have to chip in to the coffers?

Apple Mac Mini (Early 2009)

Damn it, Apple

I'm really, really starting to go off Apple. First the new Shuffles, now this. It seems like they're trying to shaft customers and making little effort to hide it. The specs are going down and the prices are going up. I think with the worldwide economy the way it is, to make these moves at this time is bat-shit insane. Apple were doing so well. The prices seemed to be respectable and they were getting more mainstream exposure. Now they're trying to take advantage of that and offer overpriced shite again. Apart from the OS, what else do you get by paying this money? An Apple logo? If the OS is what matters, buy a PC for way less money with similar specs and shove OSx86 on there.

I hope people vote with their wallets and force Apple into a rethink about their strategies, because I, for one, see this as the wrong direction.

Vista to XP 'downgrade' lawsuit revised

What's the problem?

She wanted software that wasn't included with her system. Regardless of which one is better than the other, she needed additional software and was charged for it. I'm actually going to side with Microsoft on this one.

Metallica's Lars Ulrich illegally downloads own album

Hmm...

I'm not a lawyer. His band may own copyright to the music, but I'm pretty sure they don't own the distribution rights, so maybe he has broken a law here. If someone decided to take action against him for this, the world would implode from the weight of the irony.

I think I'll get ready for the drummer induced apocalypse.

Data Protection Act 'is not enforced'

The same everywhere

I live temporarily in Denmark and I experienced the same thing with a bank here. They had experienced a data loss that they didn't disclose. I found out about it by accident. They sent out an email saying they had detected 'customers with malware'. After a long phone conversation with some morons there, they admitted that some of their customer data had been discovered for sale on some Russian server. Companies go out of their way to make sure you don't know what's happened to your data and there should be severe penalties handed out for a data breach that can be proven that the company knew about it and didn't disclose it. The UK has a piss poor record on enforcing anything. We've bugger all chance of getting them to do anything about this.

San Diego F-18 crash deaths 'avoidable'

Don't get it.

How can any relative of the victims think he did everything he could to avoid the deaths? He did fuck all to avoid the deaths, his actions caused them. The bloody coward has an ejector seat for his safety if it all goes pear shaped, the people on the ground have nothing. Instead of opting to plunge his fighter into the sea, he chose a landing point that he knew if he lost control, it would hit people. I don't see any reason why this pilot shouldn't spend jail time, let alone be removed from flying duties.

Mr. and Mrs. Boring lose Google Street View tilt

Hmm...

Normally I'm on the side of the courts in cases like this and love the idiots getting told to get on their bikes, but I might be flip-flopping here. I don't know the details, but if Google drove onto their private property without permission, photographed that private property without permission and then published it without permission, then that's pretty shitty. I'd be angry as hell too if that happened to me. No one has a right to be on your premises without your permission and they can't do what they like when they're there. Lots of private properties such as Airports and onboard aircraft have rules where they can tell you not to take pictures and it's legal to do so. I don't see how these people lost. Whatever amount they were asking for or whatever their claims were is a technicallity, surely what Google did is trespass and it's bewildering how they can get away with it. I hope this couple gets a better lawyer, downgrades the claim and appeals. And wins.

Virgin Media trials longer bandwidth throttling

Idiots

Web usage is on the increase, they know this. I don't see why they don't splash the cash on some better infrastructure instead of punishing customers. Most people assume that the only reason for consuming this much bandwidth is Torrents, but one game demo from Xbox Live , downloading an ISO image from somewhere or heavy data streaming will trigger the limit, sometimes long before your download is complete. All this is going to do is drive heavy users away from the service, and we're all smart enough to see that's exactly the plan. They want people who barely use the service to pay them money which is all profit and get rid of the heavy users who cost them money. They can't just kick you off the service, imagine the bad press, so they do this where only the IT community hears about it and whines about it and the average Joe is none-the-wiser. I know they're a business and they're in this to make money, but they shouldn't be selling a product which isn't profitable if people choose to use it. I hope they slowly fade away and die.

Britain used to be known for it's scientific and technologic prowess, now look at us. Crappy broadband speeds and restricting what little we have. What must Japan be thinking of us now?

Windows Vista man channels Neil Diamond with debut album

Why the hate?

Do you assume he'll be crap because he's an ex software guy from Microsoft? If acters can become senators and president in the US, maybe this guy can make it as a recording artist. Stranger things have happened. I wish the guy good luck.

Brits 'a bunch of yellow bastards', says irate Yank

Made my day

@Don Sinclair: best rant ever. Have a prize. Also, someone please tell the US to stop being so jealous and insecure and just leave us alone. You're starting to make Europe wish we'd never settled in your damn country. We sent our bloody criminals to Australia and that still worked out better than your excuse for a 'country'. Ah well, live and learn, eh?

Windows 7 'upgrade' doesn't mark XP spot

Jesus

Funny how everyone's an expert on an OS still in public Beta and who have never seen the source code or developed for. Why don't you all just wait and see how things pan out for once and do something a little more productive than moaning about how much of a disaster Windows 7 will be? Will there ever be an OS worthy of you?

Google mistakes entire web for malware

God...

@Thomas Baker: It affected all browsers. It affected IE7 for me. Besides, it was a server side thing, so I doubt the browser would make much difference. And for everyone here whining about not getting 'credit', stop being such a pathetic attention whore. I noticed the issue, like a lot of the world, but I just ignored it and got on with my day and waiting for Google to sort it out. I didn't send it into a load of IT sites then came back looking to see if someone had mentioned my name. Do you REALLY think you're the only ones who noticed this issue and the only ones who sent in a tip. Get over yourselves.

Texas lawyer sues Citibank over fake cheque scam

Holy hell.

How does an educated professional fall for this? He works in law and he's NEVER heard of this scam? How much more greedy and stupid can lawyers get. I hope he loses and has to pay out even more money in law fees. He completely and utterly deserves it. Douchebag.

'Bart Simpson' punts Church of Scientology

Moron

Being sucked in by religion makes you gullible. Being sucked in by scientology makes you a fool. Giving $10m to the twats and risking your job by associating The Simpsons with something Fox didn't authorise makes you nothing but an A Grade, 5 star, award winning moron and I've lost what little respect I have for Nancy Cartwright.

Exploding core counts: Heading for the buffers

I don't get it

Even though I am a professional developer, I just don't get why some hardware can't be designed that automatically spread the load between different cores. Is it really that much of a problem to do so?

Extreme pron vigilantes are after you

Give up

They should just stop caring now. The hate campaign against file sharers didn't go too well with all the man power and money behind that, did it? What makes them think a few nutbulls and one python script can do any better at this? No one really cares about this law, it'll hopefully all blow over and they should simply give up now before they embarrass themselves. Go and spend your time and resources in doing something useful and that people will thank you for, not send you abusive emails for. As a final touch of irony, I like how they used the expression 'Scot-Free', as all Scots are for the time being.

Seven Japanese poisoned by blowfish 'nads

Idiots

How can ANY food taste so good that it's worth risking death for? Especially when that food is raw fish bollocks. Japan is a very, very odd country.

I'm off out for some deep fried fish with no bollocks in sight.

Mac malware tide on the rise

Good.

Maybe this will shut up 'holier-then-thou' mac users. I use both, but I'm sick of those idiots popping up everytime anywhere mentions anything going wrong with a Windows machine. A good proportion of Linux users are the same. It's time people realised that OSX is no better than any other OS and with the attention it's now getting, the proof is coming. And the fact that it happens to dirty, theiving pirates is just gravy. There's no need to steal Photoshop when GIMP is out there. There's no need to steal iWork when Open Office is out there. Professionals need the top end stuff. Professionals can afford it. This is thieving gits downloading software they don't need and can't afford therefor shouldn't have. Ironic that malware developers are providing poetic justice.

Now, is this jacket flame retardant...

Extreme porn law goes live - are you ready?

Worst. Law. Ever

How the hell is it fair for a jury or magistrate to determine what's offensive? Offensive to who? So, if the jury is full of over-sensitve morons, you can be convicted of owning images that are doing no one any harm? Offensiveness is subjective and can't be set in stone. If you're viewing these pictures on your own laptop and you don't show them to anyone, how can they be offensive if they're not offensive to person who owns them?

Britain is going to hell in a handbasket. Come on Scotland, don't allow this crap too.

Mine's the one with a ticket out of here in the pocket.

Seagate firmware fix bricks Barracudas

Blame the users a teeny bit?

For one thing, as Seagate says, why would you upgrade a drives firmware without backing up your data? You should KNOW if anything goes wrong, you're screwed. Also like Seagate says, why did these users apply a firmware update when they didn't seem to have issues in the first place? Wasn't the original issue with the 1Tb drives? Why did all these 500Gb users go and apply a new firmware? Sometimes it's best to ignore your geek urges and just leave something alone if it's working fine.

Scotland's porn laws: Can we talk about this like grown-ups?

Idiots

If the material is performance, what's the issue? If it's part of a movie or two consenting porn models had photographs taken for a website, where's the harm? Who's being hurt here? People are making material that people want to buy. The seller makes money, the buyer gets something they want. I fail to see the illegality there. Doesn't the UK have better issues to put these resources to instead of telling us what kind of porn we can look at it. I used to regret moving away from Scotland but things like this really help with the transition.

Mine's the one with the torn up ticket home in the pocket.

'Miracle' plane crash was no miracle

Fool

@Do Not Fold Spindle Mutilate, you not only quoted Wiki, but you also failed to read the articles you provided to correct someone else. The incident took place over the Atlantic, not the Pacific. Unless the Azores have been relocated or there's been a total ban on eastbound flying forcing aircraft to fly West and go the long way.

419ers take Canadian for $150,000

Can't be true

I'm not going to go along with calling this guy an award winning moron, because I don't believe the story. There's no way in hell a whole family would be this stupid. One guy maybe, but not a whole family. People this stupid simply can't get access to this kind of money unless they're royalty. I doubt the story is true.

Danish SWAT team surrounds PlayStation shoot-'em-up

Not the real story

I think the only reason this made the news was the fact that someone called the cops in Copenhagen and they actually bothered their arses to turn up. That's headline news. Lazy, useless bastards, believe me.

Deception of 'up to' broadband speeds exposed

Not the problem

Sorting out the speed of connections isn't the issue that needs tackling. It's this bullshit 'unlimited' claim that's the problem. So many ISPs, if not at least all major ones, will come knocking if you eat up bandwidth and everyone knows it. It's likely torrent traffic, but it could be other things, and if you pay for unlimited access you should get that, regardless of how much you use or what you use it for. I'd much rather ISPs were shafted for that tactic than speed restrictions. Besides, they like users having slow speeds, because it reduces how much data you transfer and puts you off torrenting because your speeds are arse. Once they give everyone fast, stable connections, more people will trigger data limits and then everyone will complain about that instead. You know it's going to happen. if they ever give customers a fast, stable connection that is, and seeing how this is Britain, it ain't gonna happen. Whatever happened to us, eh? We have the world just about every invention worth a crap as a nation and we can't even get decent broadband going.

Microsoft disables automatic IE 8 downloads

Damn MS

I'm with other people here. I'm tired of having to code workarounds to get my standard code to work with IE. MS should have stuck to the standards all along and not done what they liked. I hope with IE8 and from then on, they stick to the standards in place so that we developers can write one lot of code and not have to jump through multiple browsers and Virtual Machines to make sure we've pleased Microsoft.

Dogs and arson feature in top 10 data recovery disasters

CCTV?

CCTV cameras store the data locally? How do they retrieve it? I thought the images would have been stored at the monitoring centre and not in the camera itself. Seems stupid to me.

Apologies after teacher's 'Linux holding back kids' claim

Come on El Reg

Maybe you should report the WHOLE story and not make this woman, stupid as she was, feel any worse.

http://linuxlock.blogspot.com/2008/12/character-assasinations-aint-us.html

Exam board to hear appeal over format cockup

Title required

My irony meter is off the chart that something as simple as word processor document caused such a f**k-up between IT students, an IT school and IT examinators. It's too much, it really. They all fail, really.

Armed anti-paedophile cops swoop on video site uploader

Really?

Their elite force is called task force Argos? There's your problem. You expect a f**k up from anything called Argos.

Booby-trapped emails fly back into fashion

Morons

Who falls for this? Really? This is nothing to do with technological know-how, this is recieveing airline tickets you didn't order and believing it. Doesn't anyone who's been using the internet for more than 10 minutes know you shouldn't open attachments from a source you don't know or trust?

Brits decline to 'think outside the box'

jesus...

No Guestimate?

Axl Rose may have undermined own case over Dr Pepper stunt

Huh?

Are you having a f**king giraffe? How can anyone care enough to log onto a website and go through all that for a free soft drink, let alone complain on the internet when they didn't get it. It's beyond greedy and pathetic. It's in a new realm above that. It's...American...Ewww

IT departments VAT-whacked

Hard coded?

Who the hell hardcodes a variable rate? If you've made the mistake, how about a search and replace? Either for the 17.5% or for new programmers, whichever suits.

China slams Guns N' Roses album

Good idea

A country who doesn't want its people to have to listen to Chinese Democracy and would like to ban Bjork, eh? China has some ideas I could get on board with.

Parallels 4 users want their money back

Now I get it...

So this is where game deveopers cut their teeth on the release and patch model...

Ofcom slaps down Phones4U

Hmmm

Phones4U say others are to blame? They say they promise they'll never rip people off again? I smell shite...

Yahoo! shares tumble as Ballmer shuts coffin on Microhoo

sniff..sniff...

Is that the smell of desperation in the air..? Or is it panic..?

Man threatens lawsuit after negative eBay feedback

Idiot

All this fool has done is make sure anyone who takes even a passing interest in the Internet will avoid him like crabs. I would expect him to find things a little harder to shift on eBay now. OR...find things selling more but being sold to people with the sole intention of making life difficult for him afterwards or intending to scam him.

BBC clarifies location of England

American Idiot

I agree with the general consensus here that it's for the readers over the pond that somehow stumble onto the site. I am a Scot and upon a New Yorker hearing my accent, I was asked which part of Ireland I came from. (Swing and a miss). I then told him I was from Scotland and was then asked which part of Ireland that was (Another swing at thin air). I explained that Scotland wasn't in Ireland and then he asked if it was near London. (Strike three, you're outta here.) The most powerful nation in the World? It's scary, that many idiots having so much collective power.

Vista scrabbles for X Factor

Fanboys

There's nothing wrong with Vista if it's configured properly. Maybe for people who build custom desktops and can't stop arsing about their install for five minutes, it's nothing but headaches. Buy a new laptop with Vista installed and configured and it runs fine. If you like XP, great! Stick with it and more power to you, but shut up about how shite an OS is if you don't even bloody USE it. Whining, geeky bastards...

Serial troll bitchslaps Reg hack

We don't need no education...

With his spelling, grammer and bewildering grasp of war history, you really have to wonder what they teach American kids in schools these days, except how a gun works and the best way to upsell fries to a customer.

Scotland Mountain Rescue turns on Ofcom

Who'll save them?

Couldn't our useless government cough up the cash for this? It's peanuts in the grand scheme and they'll throw away many times this amount on shite no one wants or asked for. Come on number 10, how about doing something good and useful for once?

Ambulance Service not patient enough for Vista

Don't get it

I don't know why people hate Vista so much. I've used many OS's over my time and I recently picked up a laptop with Vista on it. I had planned to downgrade to XP because of all the negativity around it. I spent the day messing with it and thought it wasn't bad. I held off for a few days because it seemed fine to me. Months later, it's still on here because I haven't had one single issue with it.

Trigger-happy Welsh cops taser sheep

A bit over the top

Tazering a scared animal without trying any other methods is a bit over the top though, isn't it? If a member of the public had done this, they'd have been prosecuted no doubt, so why should the police force get away with it? If the traffic had stopped and motorists had got out their car, how is there an immediate danger to motorists? Unless the sheep jumped in someone's car and ran them over as it drove off, it's pretty harmless. This is why the muppets in uniform here shouldn't be given a tazer. They're lucky they're still allowed a baton. We should tazer one of them when they're in the road and see how they like it.