* Posts by Les Matthew

541 posts • joined 17 Apr 2007

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Beeb to cut the f**king swearing

Les Matthew
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@Elmer Phud

“Suck my lozenge”

Icon says it all.

Apple to slash prices by up to 15% on Black Friday?

Les Matthew

@Robert Moore

"This ia as likely as Apple releasing a PC version of OS/X"

I thought modern Apple computers are a PC hardware wise.

No cheap Blu-ray players for Blighty this Xmas

Les Matthew

To all finding them online

But what quantities do they and will they have? A couple of retailers with a few is hardly going to fill the seasonal demand.

A sex show of truly Olympian proportions?

Les Matthew

@Eddie

Check the Galleries. ;)

Home Office to hand out more Tasers to police

Les Matthew
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@Dave Ross

About nine minutes. ;)

BOFH: The unwanted software compo

Les Matthew

Re: On Pounds and Dollars

You can add carpet and monkey too.

Terror in orbit: ISS piss recycler in fire alarm mishap

Les Matthew

@Hollerith

"a mouthful of diet Coke"

You know what unrecycled piss tastes like then.

Scots vote out ID cards

Les Matthew

Re: I never understood ...

Maybe you should check the governments record on keeping our data secured.

Firefox millions - only 12 per cent Google free

Les Matthew
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What Google search?

http://home.clara.net/lesmcdm/images/elregs.png

Oz driver pulled with todger in pasta sauce jar

Les Matthew
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Any relation to this guy?

http://www.theregister.co.uk/2008/07/31/oz_speeding_driver/

Brit couple divorce over Sadville infidelity

Les Matthew

@Greg

"But you'll notice, the 55 year-old Yank is a lot thinner and prettier than the 28 year-old Brit."

There are always exceptions to the rule. ;)

iPod cans menace pacemakers

Les Matthew
Joke

Some music

really is heart stopping.

Copper propositioned woman while 'on the job'

Les Matthew
Boffin

@Dazed and Confused

Did you read the article? Especially about the second woman.

MP calls for Jezza Clarkson's head

Les Matthew

Calls for his head

Why would anyone want ten pounds of ugly fat?

Ofcom urges government restraint on new broadband

Les Matthew
Stop

UK Government and hands off the internet hahahaha

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/uknews/3384743/Internet-black-boxes-to-record-every-email-and-website-visit.html

Hitachi UT32MH70 32in LCD TV

Les Matthew

TV?

I may be reading this wrong but isn't it just a monitor with an add on tuner? As it comes without a tuner.

Undetectable data-stealing trojan nabs 500,000 virtual wallets

Les Matthew

Re: Bollocks!

Won't "fdisk /mbr" fix it?

Beeb cans TOTP Xmas special

Les Matthew

Russell Brand

Who he?

Plymouth nurse punted panties on eBay

Les Matthew
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Twenty five pounds?

Not to be sniffed at.

Gov cans 'national day' plans

Les Matthew
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"British identity is bound up in our institutions"

Like our financial ones?

I'm very sorry, says gay health warning clergyman

Les Matthew
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"The chaplain to the London Stock Exchange"

I find it amusing considering that organisations involvement in buggering the economy.

Godfather dons 'best ever film' mantle

Les Matthew
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Just checked the list and

The Shawshank Redemption is now number one. Excellent film and definitely one of my all favourites along with Blade Runner and the original Alien.

Secret Windows 7 screens leaked?

Les Matthew

@Solomon Grundy

"You said it. Without MS you wouldn't have a job. MS may be lacking on some technical fronts but lets face it - without MS none of the people reading this site would have IT jobs...We''d all be living in our Mums basement and masturbating to the cover of Foxy."

What utter tosh. If there was no Microsoft it would just be some other company. Microsoft weren't even IBM's first choice for the PC.

Hammer Films has risen from the grave

Les Matthew
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Hammer house of horror

Low cut heaving cleavages with heavy breathing.

Excuse me while I have an Otto Chriek moment.

Police drop BT-Phorm probe

Les Matthew

Come on guys

Are any of you surprised by this?

Electric Mini spied in Munich

Les Matthew

"Hybrid Test Vehicle"

With no exhaust pipe? What's hybrid about it then?

Miracle airship tech sustained by DARPA pork trickle

Les Matthew
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Yes, my mind is in the sewer

What does the second image on the second page remind you of?

Griffin pitches out-loud music without wires - or speakers

Les Matthew

@SImon Hobson

"So that would be what most people would recognise as a "horn" then - you know, like those trumpet shaped speakers used at outdoor event for the PA. All they've done is coil one up and make it look pretty."

It's more like a folded horn. Straight horn flares usually have a compression driver fitted to them whereas a folded horn will have a regular driver in them.

Say hi to Haumea - our fifth dwarf planet

Les Matthew
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@Michael

"This is not slashdot."

-1 Offtopic

Beauty contest judge canned for slamming 'munter' contestants

Les Matthew
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@ratfox

Here's a fashion statement for you.

http://www.cantonese.sheik.co.uk/essays/tattoos.htm

Yes, there was a viable liquid bomb plot

Les Matthew

Retrial is on the cards

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/uk/7608780.stm

Mills and Boon thrusts into pr0n market

Les Matthew

"no-holes-barred sex filth"

I notice this is not the first time that you use the word "filth" in your articles that have something to do with sex.

Is this telling or what?

Google News farce triggers Wall Street sell-off

Les Matthew
Boffin

@George Oommen

"some yank recently asked me if I voted for Gordon Brown and was suprised to learn that no-one did! "

Ask the American what a vice president is.

Obama strumpet-sex scandal ruse spreads malware

Les Matthew

@Sceptical Bastard

"with the stain at thigh level"

Ah, I see your account has been emptied then.

Scottish beavers (and Cali cacti) get their chips

Les Matthew
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@James Anderson

"Apparently theres good eating in one of those as well"

har har, luckily I had just put down my coffee before I read that.

Phorm: Our business is fine, honest

Les Matthew

What a coincidence

I was only thinking last night that it had gone all quiet on the Phorm front.

Emails allege ATI-Nvidia price fixing conspiracy

Les Matthew

Re: Remember 3DFX

What, when I had to pay £250 for my matrox millenium 2D video card and £150 for my 3DFx voodoo graphics accelerator?

I can go back even farther, anyone remember how expensive a Hercules Graphics Station card was?

Les Matthew

Also

Compare my above purchases to my latest. Geforce 8800 GT 512MB for less than £120 delivered. Forgot to mention the matrox and 3DFx cards in my first post had 4MB memory each.

Dixons Group still suffering

Les Matthew
Boffin

@Jason Clery

So he was asking if it was cable or ADSL? There is a difference as you usually get given a specific modem for cable so don't need one built into the router.

Customs raids tech trade show

Les Matthew
Black Helicopters

@Neil Hoskins

"It seems incredibly heavy handed to us in Blighty"

I think you'll find that customs in the UK can be equally heavy handed. The expression "law unto themselves" springs to mind.

Larry Ellison gets huge pay rise

Les Matthew
Joke

What do you give a man who's got everything?

Penicillin.

Portsmouth punts naval boy-on-boy to innocent kiddies

Les Matthew
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I'm surprised no one has noticed

that the blonde needs his roots doing. Were there a lot of peroxide blondes in the navy back then?

Les Matthew
Joke

"a touch o' the cat"

Sorry, no pussy involved.

Wind turbines put bats under (low) pressure

Les Matthew
Joke

@E

Sounds like my fridge, there's been a few things growing in there that I'm sure would have killed me in a few minutes.

Old timers rattle zimmers at 'Elderly Persons' sign

Les Matthew
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An inescapable fact for all you young smart arses

Old and wrinkly is what the future holds for you.

Hold that thought and enjoy.

Puerto Rican corpse stands for three-day wake

Les Matthew
Coat

He looks a bit

stiff in that pose.

AMD's 'Fusion' not a native CPU+GPU design

Les Matthew

"the boot is now firmly on the other foot"

Do Intel have a CPU+GPU on a single slab of silicon?

French cough in to filthy restaurants

Les Matthew

@sauerkraut

"yup, i'm a damn racist..."

Nope, you're a xenophobe.

Apple preps patch for 'problematic 3G' iPhone?

Les Matthew
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Keep the iArticles coming

I just love the flame wars.

Mashed up Met Police crime maps go online

Les Matthew

I'm average

12 in May 2 in June, sandwiched between two high areas about 50 yards away on either side.

That makes me feel really safe.

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