* Posts by Les Matthew

541 posts • joined 17 Apr 2007


BT slammed for 'importing' cheap Indian contractors

Les Matthew

Re: 8 grand a month

"get a grip on reality, you really are not worth that much. Regardless of your skill set."

Unlike our MP's who trouser similar amounts with all their little extras.

And why shouldn't skilled workers that are good at what they do be able to earn good money?

After all, bankers and peeps in the financial sector have been trousering insane amounts for what appears to have been piss poor skill levels.

Just because you get shit wages doesn't mean everyone else should.

Blears is latest to scurry away from Brown's Cabinet

Les Matthew

Before you all cheer

just remember that The Dark Lord is sitting in the wings.

Dutch cat skinner publishes critics' personal details

Les Matthew
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@Sarah Bee

"Nice bag though."

Nice Purrse.

Gov spunks hundreds of thousands on mobe condom clip

Les Matthew

"Want respect - don't piss away money on Web 2.0 rubbish"

Shouldn't that be:

Want respect - don't spunk away money on Web 2.0 rubbish?

Irish politico in Facebook jub-rub outrage

Les Matthew


"Anyone who claims they haven't done similar is either a) lying b) so old they can't remember that far back."

Nobody has fondled my man boobs in a long time. Well, not since I didn't have them. :)

Hackintosh maker files for bankruptcy

Les Matthew
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One door closes, another door opens.


Les Matthew

Re: Good

"Utter parasites"

Like Compaq?

'Thieving' sperm whale caught on CCTV

Les Matthew
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@@The Giant Squid guy

"For all we know they might pair off mano a mano for death matches and 20,000 feet.... yeah I like that one!"


Paris loses her BlackBerry in Cannes hotel

Les Matthew

jings, crivens and help ma bob

A Paris Hilton article with an IT angle. Old Nick must be skating to work. ;)

Yorkshire boozer establishes 'smoking research centre'

Les Matthew

I'd love to wave a magic wand

that stops everybody from smoking all at once. Just to hear all the sanctimonious holier than thou non-smokers squeal like stuck pigs as our darling chancellor finds new and imaginative ways to claw back the £12 billion a year in extra tax that smokers pay.

80% of a packet of cigs price is tax.

So remember folks, smokers are doing something for you, they are lowering your tax bill.


Flame away, I'm off to light one up.

Debbie Gibson battles Mega Shark and Giant Octopus

Les Matthew

@Paul C. Hartley

"I want sharks with fricking lasers on their fricking heads!"

That shark don't need no frickin lasers.

Les Matthew
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I'm with you on the

last paragraph.

Just LOL.

Taiwanese rat snake bites Taiwanese trouser snake

Les Matthew

Re: Sitting down to pee

It's no good standing on the seat

the snakes in here can jump ten feet.

Secret US robo whispercopters head to 'undisclosed location'

Les Matthew
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@Paul Murphy


Unintended typo that works?

Love on the buses: The S-100 and me

Les Matthew

£ Prices quoted

Haha, I seem to remember that anyting computer related back in the bad old days was priced at £2 to $1 minimum.

No-go woe for doughnut co after Vo-Vo blow

Les Matthew
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So, they're trying to put a

woah woah on the vo vo?

Carphone Warehouse linked to Tiscali buy-up (again)

Les Matthew

Re: why lash the cash?

I'm not sure how it works but I assume if Tiscali went under there would be 1.8 million customers without broadband and therefore looking elsewhere for their connection.

Some may find this hard to believe but Tiscali broadband has got even worse over the last fortnight.

Musician dumps instruments for iPhone

Les Matthew

Will he be using

fruity loops?

Swine flu apocalypse: Batten down the hatches

Les Matthew

cruel and unusual punishment

Instant coffee for two weeks.

US declares 'public health emergency' over swine flu

Les Matthew

Re: *cough sniff splutter*

I've had Influenza twice in my 55 years and no way could I ever mistake it for the common cold.

Wolverine leak claims first victim?

Les Matthew

"Wolverine leak claims first victim?"

Shouldn't that read

"Wolverine leak claims first idiot?"

Miss Universe pops into Guantánamo Bay

Les Matthew

"She admitted:"

I admitted that I was reaching for the sick bag when I read that line.

Bondage bonzer for bonding, beam boffins

Les Matthew
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"The bottom line being"

Haha, I'm sure we're going to see a welter of bad puns on this one.

G20 police demand ID as train staff ordered to spy on passengers

Les Matthew

Re:Glencoe ??

"Wasn't it the McDonalds who got massacred at Glencoe."

No, it was the MacDonalds.

Councils clamp down on Strategy Boutique Newspeak

Les Matthew


If you can't dazzle them with brilliance, baffle them with bullshit.

BBC botnet investigation turns hacks into hackers

Les Matthew

Is that the sound

of something hitting a fan that I can hear?

Scotland Today in news nipslip outrage

Les Matthew

Re: Sweet!

"More tits on the news please."

Don't we have enough politicians on the news as it is?

AA sniffs out Blighty's best bacon sarnie

Les Matthew
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no HP sauce?

Spotify: We kick the tyres

Les Matthew
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@Paul Murphy

You should try Radio 7, a lot of old/good stuff pops up on there.

OpenDNS rolls out Conficker tracking, blocking

Les Matthew
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Another for OpenDNS

Been using it on my home connections for several months now as Tiscali's DNS servers are absolute kak.

Gimme some (more) money, demand Spinal Tap

Les Matthew
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Someone at the BBC must be a fan.


Blizzard of smut cuts off Council websites

Les Matthew
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Re: Don't diss West Wittering

"Best surf in the south."

In more ways than one now, it appears.

Texas lawyer sues Citibank over fake cheque scam

Les Matthew

@Kenny Swan

"How does an educated professional fall for this?"


Jaunty Jackalope alpha 3 spotted in wild

Les Matthew

Re: Jaunty Jackalope?

"When you get grown up version names, you'll get treated like grown ups."

I think you'll find that its grown up name is "Ubuntu 9.04"

Lords, MPs go down on to the Erotic Awards

Les Matthew

Is that

a golden dildo in the picture on the right-hand sidebar?

I was going to use the thumbs-up (Love it) icon but thought better of it. :D

DARPA seeks spraycan wound-polyfilla* for injured troops

Les Matthew

@Skip Curry

"Paris: Cos shes been in many a sticky situation."

Only two, apparently.

Shane Ritchie poised to 'reinvent' Minder

Les Matthew

Can it be any worse

than what the BBC have just done with The 39 Steps?

SCO auctions Unix and mobile assets to continue fight

Les Matthew

Re:Who cares? Who will buy?

Someone that wants to see litigation against Linux go on as long as is possible?

Confusion reigns ahead of comms überdatabase debate

Les Matthew


"Because if you have an arrest at the scene, bringing in a phone conversation with his mates about how he was going to rob the store on thursday isn't going to secure a conviction by its inclusion: the arrest itself is enough."

But that might help to prove conspiracy and iirc conspiracy in a charge carries a much heavier penalty.

Just a thought.

Personally, this governments path towards total control freakery worries me greatly.

Take a hammer to your hard drive, shrieks Which?

Les Matthew

Maybe somebody should tell them about


Apple's latest patent brilliance: the iGlove

Les Matthew
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Is it just us?


Google scrubs urinating woman from Street View

Les Matthew

@ Huw Davies

I wonder which head they cut off?

Bit harsh either way.

Les Matthew

Re: Taking the piss


Check 17 and 10. ;)

Tabloid girl's jubs freeze at -130°C

Les Matthew

@Justin Case

"You mean there was an article?"

It did raise a couple of interesting points.

Fly-tipping yes, dog poo no - Jacqui promises Ripa changes

Les Matthew

For all asking about fly-tipping

Here is a real world example.


Flab-fighting EV powered by pizza

Les Matthew

RE: I can't be the first one to think 'Flintstones'

I thought of these


on steroids.

2008's top three touchscreen phones

Les Matthew
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Soon as I saw the iphone in third place

I just knew I was going to enjoy the comments section.

Germany tests tadpole airship

Les Matthew
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My first thoughts were of this


Phones to be powered by speech?

Les Matthew

"Phones to be powered by speech?"

Pffft, lightweight.

My daughter could power the whole house.

BBC relives The Day of The Triffids

Les Matthew
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"I want to be a triffid."

Now there's a wish with a sting in the tail.



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