Posts by Nebulo

Large Hadron boffin arrested on terrorism suspicion

Money on?

Given that we know that "Al-Qaeda" is a CIA invention, it's a certainty.

What self-respecting terrorist, after all, would call his organisation "The Toilet"?

(www.whatreallyhappened.com/fakealqaeda.html refers)

Phorm takes a bullet for the advertising industry

@Ed Blackshaw

Very well said, twice.

If I want to buy something, I'll go and look for one, thanks, and decide on the facts. One factor heavily influencing my decision is always which contender has NOT shoved "funny"/ garish/ animated/ whatever crap in my face/ web viewing/ environment/ etc. in an attempt to influence me. More people should treat advertising as negative - it's the only language "they" understand.

Web firms seek Royal Mail rivals with GSOH for delivery fling

Of course ...

If the greedy rabble of private companies who now feast off what *used* to be Royal Mail's profitable business were required to provide the same universal service, covering the whole UK, it might matter less, or not at all, if RM did disappear.

As it is, RM struggles still to provide proper, universal service without the income to keep it going - a recipe for disaster or, at least, progressively more expensive mail. Either force the greedy rabble to provide a proper, universal service at one price like RM, or put our country back together again, please.

If you break up a country's infrastructure, as the evil Thatcher did in spades, you can't be surprised when stuff stops working properly. Private companies don't exist to provide a service, they exist to channel your money into their shareholders' pockets by the easiest possible route, which doesn't include troublesome deliveries to more remote places like Shetland.

Flame on.

Welsh yobs clobbered by cross-dressing cage fighters

Magic.

Always refreshing to hear about scumbags getting done over, and even better that it was one which will embarrass them in front of their mates for years and years to come.

Another such, which I clipped out of the Guardian years ago and which deserves not to be forgotten:

"Seven Spanish teenagers have been hospitalised after attempting to mug a defenceless woman in Alicante. Herminia Alvarez, as the boys have since discovered, is a circus weight-lifter, the centre-piece of whose act is supporting eight people on one shoulder."

New antimatter atomsmashers 'may destroy themselves'

Eh?

"If you have a collection of huge bells all ringing at slightly different frequencies or tones, the amplitude or ‘wave height’ of the overall sound heard will be markedly smaller than that heard if they all ring at the same tone."

I'm not entirely convinced by that analogy. If you've ever tried recording choral music, where you have a collection of human voices all singing at slightly different frequencies, you'll know why. The <average> level may be more-or-less constant and predictable, but every now and then when the phases add up just right (or wrong) you can get a momentary amplitude which pins your meter on the stop (analogue) or clips (digital), if you're not aware of the problem.

And if one of those peaks is enough to create a "wake field" ... hang on, isn't that in Yorkshire? ... then, presumably, a super super burnout for your new toy.

Ex-GCHQ spy chief lands defence giant gig

Like the wheels on the bus

The revolving door goes round and round,

Round and round,

Round and round,

The revolving door goes round and round,

All day long.

Who will rid us of these turbulent* parasites?

* New Shorter OED:

- turbulent (adj)

3 Of, pertaining to, or designating flow ... in which ... there is continual mixing ...

Google strips Pirate Bay homepage from search results

Very effective

Just googled on a randomly chosen film name plus the word "torrent" (I always do it that way). TPB third one down. Nae problem.

4 in 10 Brits feel lonely without a daily texting

Mobile phones affect our emotions?

I was nearly run over by some cretin pavement cyclist sending a text message on the move a few days ago. I was going to say that they affect more than just emotions, but remembering the murderous rage I felt at the time ...

Yank slams El Reg 'zio-fruitcake' Playmobil 'crap'

@Marvin the Martian

Thank you for the translation!

So if Zio = Uncle, Zio Fruitcake = Uncle Fruitcake.

Is he saying the Reg is related to Mr. Kipling, then?

FCC ferrets around for spare spectrum

Hiding to nothing

We, the human race, have access to precisely 1.0 electromagnetic spectra. It is a strictly limited resource which cannot simply be extended at will.

We seem, though, to be able to "use" (if that's not too serious a word for some of the "uses" we see proposed) an exponentially increasing amount of spectrum.

To put it bluntly, then, neither the FCC nor our own non-regulator Ofcom can simply collect the cash from an endless stream of would-be "users" of the spectrum, much as they would no doubt like to do so. There simply isn't room for them all. If these "regulators" are truly incapable of distinguishing between services genuinely useful to society as a whole, which clearly deserve spectrum space, and the commercial froth which wants to overfill the spectrum with seventy seven shades of timewasting tat, which are at best optional extras, then it's time for them to do the Darwinian thing and become extinct, to be replaced with something which is a little more in touch with reality.

In short, as long as spectrum "regulation" is conceived of as some sort of market activity, where they get to flog spectrum to all comers, they are on a hiding to nothing. They cannot succeed. Their model is inapplicable. Instead of pleading for clever ideas to cram as much crap as possible into our 1.0 spectra, they need to prioritise allocations according to socially determined criteria, rather than according to which commercial entities can stuff the most greenery into their coffers. We live in a limited physical world, guys, not an indefinitely expandable free market. Get used to it, or go.

Home Office jumps the gun on DNA research

More doublespeak

H.O.: "Last year a total of 17,614 crimes ... were detected in which a DNA match was available."

"Available" doesn't mean "Essential".

What proportion of these 17,614 crimes could have been "detected" (? - maybe even solved) in anycase, with no recourse to universal, intrusive DNA databases?

Londoners' votes put at risk by Boris' bigwig

Still ...

It at least proves that "New" "Labour" don't have a monopoly on knowing better than the experts.

DARPA seeks orbital wheely-bin plan

Easy

All they need is a huge lump of Blu-Tack. Put it into Darkwolf's orbit and, AC 15:54, you can mine it when it gets lower.

No, no, guys, just a few of the millions you're saving will be fine, really ...

Pirate Bay's would-be saviour hit by 'bankruptcy order'

Arrr

Yer only put this story in 'cos o' TLAPD bein so close an' yer wanted this comment, ye lubbers.

Government swiftly backpedals on vetting scheme

And nobody's mentioned

Common Purpose.

Imagine their zealots running this system (hell, from the look of it they *designed* the system) with their usual enthusiasm for going beyond the call of duty in the cause of the destruction of society.

Dear God, and I say that as an atheist.

Like AC 15:35 GMT, I don't trust it one tiny bit. As someone said in a Guardian letter today, can it be long before you need a CRB check to live on a street where there is a family with children?

BB. Not *just* watching. Listening out for malicious gossip too.

Church altar smites devout Catholic

God works in mysterious ways

^^ That's it.

Investigators blind on P2P child abuse

@AC 13:01

Just "I don't trust the people making these regulations" would do for me. Your argument (along with most others here) is sound, but as we've noticed, that counts for sod all these days.

Explorers unearth cat-sized rat

If ...

... they grow to that size in the backwoods of Papua NG, God help us all when they get near the bins round here ...

Ofcom fails to sweep away power-line networking

Horses for courses

Oh, dear, Michael C - "Cut back the HAM frequenct range to about 10-20% of what it is today"? That is an astonishingly arrogant attitude, which surely shows that you do not understand the issues - issues which arise whenever *anything* is permitted to radiate EM energy in the range (approximately) 1.6 to 30 MHz. And what difference does it make how many of us are actually active? - there are only a minority of us interested in *most* things, except maybe football, yet we seem mainly to accommodate our differences amicably enough.

In the real world - the one out there which AFAIK exists quite independently of all our arguments and sophistries - the shortwave frequencies exhibit the unique ability to allow very small signals, intereacting with the earth and its ionosphere, to travel over, and be received at, incredible distances, up to and including right round the world. No other frequency range offers anything like this natural property. By the time they get into my receiver, we might easily be talking about attowatts - millionths of millionths of microwatts. Femtowatts are easy. Picowatts are downright luxury. How much, precisely, does your PLT thing radiate?

Lower frequencies (think LW or MW transmitters) need a good deal of power and aerial systems which, though physically big, are electrically rather small and inefficient. Although there is some skywave present after dark, the range is essentially limited to groundwave distances, which means local, by day, and maybe into Europe at night. Higher frequencies - anywhere from around the VHF broadcast band up - travel generally only over line-of-sight paths, apart from rarer occurrences like meteor scatter. The line-of-sight characteristic again means, essentially, local - although many of us take advantage of the fact that satellites pass in line-of-sight range.

Inbetween, in the shortwave area under discussion, we amateurs are allocated small bands of frequencies right across the shortwave precisely because, in this region of the spectrum, the conditions vary - with time and season, as well as with frequency - enormously, and offer scope for many activities and investigations. Yes, many of us are available for emergency work too, and why not? When all your fancy digital stuff goes down, we can still guarantee a comms link, which might be vital; most of that, though, goes on at VHF, so isn't really relevant to a dispute over shortwave.

Why should the unique features of shortwave simply be sacrificed to the convenience of people who can't be arsed to run a simple cable from A to B, or to install, instead of PLT, a 2.4 GHz WiFi - which doesn't crap right across the spectrum - to connect their digital boxes? Everyone who plugs in a PLT system WILL contribute sufficient pollution to that super-sensitive frequency range to destroy its usefulness to the people who are trying - quite legally - to use shortwave in the exploitation and investigation of its unique characteristics. They do not "impair" its use, they do not "add a bit of background noise" - they *destroy* it, since by definition we are looking for the very smallest signals. The situation is very like that resulting from modern light pollution of the night sky, which results in your being able to discern maybe half a dozen very bright stars instead of the thousands and thousands of tiny ones which are there ... so I'm told. Civilisation detaches us from the real world in many ways. Why add more?

No. No matter what commercial considerations may be tried as levers to force this polluting abuse of the electromagnetic spectrum onto the market, it should be banned outright, along with atrocities like "WiTricity". No equipment whatever, if not intended for a bona-fide radio use - which are long-established - should be allowed to emit *any* significant energy between at least 1.6 and 30 MHz. Indeed, it might be preferable to extend the upper limit to 50 or 100 MHz, to allow for proper investigation of the extreme - and extremely interesting - phenomena which can occur in the low VHF, especially near sunspot maxima. The unique physical properties of our world should not just be polluted out of existence to suit the market, no matter how clever we get at thinking up ways of doing it.

Mind you, in a world run by quangos and governments who are firmly in the corporate pocket, don't expect rationality to count for much until after the revolution.

"Fail" icon especially for Ofcom. They're so good at it.

CRB looks to ID cards to solve accuracy woes

Never mind, though, eh?

All this creepy biometric stuff will stop when David Cameron gets in!

US women protest for the right to bare

That 'indictment' you quote

should make everyone's flesh crawl. It's about as egregious an example as you could ask for of the evil, prurient drivel which now routinely pours out of the degenerate, brain-dead petty bureaucracy which has somehow gained power over the western world. Things aren't going to get any better until the last of these specimens are thrown out.

I salute our bare-breasted sisters, and wish them a good - and successful - day.

Er ... what /is/ the IT angle? ...

Vulture 1: Calling all electronics wizards

Re. dropping like a stone ...

... Some sort of parafoil design?

Lagging etc.

David63's comment about temperature prompts me to note that it would probably be a good idea to wrap the camera (not the lens, obviously) in a thermally protective jacket. The temperature gets pretty frosty at interesting altitudes, and it wouldn't be much fun if the most interesting photos were missing because the camera or its battery had packed up.

On a structural note, papier maché presumably counts as paper and can make surprisingly strong, lightweight structures.

And another vote for PICs, but remember that if there's soldering involved get a home constructor to do it, as we (sorry, they) are still allowed to use *proper* solder with lead in it rather than that dodgy lead-free stuff. (I'm assuming we want it to work reliably :)

Increase in comms snooping? You ain't seen nothing yet

@MinionZero

Thank you. Couldn't have put it better.

Virgin Media to deploy performance monitoring tech

Inaccurate web-based speed testers?

So when we check with two or three of these, which all broadly agree, but not with VM's claims, we should nevertheless accept some bollix VM feed us as the truth?

I think not.

Cats mix baby 'cry' with purr to score dinner

Not bad, but ...

... not as good as Fat Freddy's Cat:

"Me out! Prowl now! Wow! Me out? Me out?"

(then when he gets out ... "I swear, they're so stupid they don't even seem to understand when you speak to them in their own language!")

Cops to step up use of phone and net records

That's the panopticon set up, then.

Their little piggy hearts must be jumping for joy.

Ofcom foresees an entertaining 2028

Obvious nonsense, of course

2028 is a long time after December 2012, after all. Your Mayan wristwatch will have stopped, Xenu will have called by to pick up all the scientologists, and there'll have been many variations on the end of the world, including the Second Coming. But, since we're also supposed to be moving forward into a more enlightened and spiritually aware New Age of Humanity, then Ofcom - and, presumably, political parties - will obviously have become history, as there just won't be room for anything as unenlightened and awful as they are to exist any longer.

Mine's the one with a quartz crystal in the pocket, man ... says 7.030MHz on it ...

US starts emergency radio tests

OK, not actually a bad idea ...

... but perhaps a bit of a high price to pay for what would seem to be a rather limited scanner. Why don't the powers that be just decree that from such-and-such a date all emergency comms equipment *will* be common and interoperable? One range of hardware, their own special encryption, the relative economy of scale: if a policeman needs an ambulance he only has to tune to Ambulance Control. Trivial. If the UK can stuff the entire public into digital, I'm sure the USA could convince its own officials to tidy up this problem more rationally.

UK climate change funding cut by 25%

Sounds good to me

Now all we need is a way of cutting off the feed to the rest of these scaremongers and maybe we'll be getting somewhere. The idea that our little scratchings about are 'causing' big, scary effects is pure hubris. Yes, the climate is warming. Climates warm and cool all the time, quite naturally, and at the moment ours is still warming up after the 'Little Ice Age' (slightly too long ago for Reg readers to remember it, unfortunately).

Chexk out the summary of peer-reviewed research on http://www.petitionproject.org/ - a rare glimpse of real science on the 'global warming issue'. Global Warming = Bollix.

NASA takes stick over feet and inches

@Jimbo 6

The Imperial system isn't all the Romans gave us. Not every fule no that the international standard railway gauge - four foot eight and a half inches, or 1435mm - comes from the average spacing between the wheels on a Roman cart. Flanged wheels were a later invention though, coming when we started building horse-powered railways to haul stuff out of mines, which is why the Romans didn't leave us a grid of straight railway tracks around Europe.

Don't call me Ishmael

Rule 1 is universal, actually

Used to go out with a girl who called her guitar Faramir.

We were not long for coupledom.

Intel powers netbook via thin air

And how, exactly ...

does this POS restrict its electromagnetic pollution to the vicinity of the receiver? Or does it just spew it all over the place and fuck up anyone who might be trying to *use* the frequency for transmitting actual radio transmissions, as my cynical soul suspects?

MPs turn to Black Blob to preserve their dignity

"Privacy and security", eh?

So ... THEY don't trust US to respect THEIR "privacy and security", but they expect US to give THEM every last detail of our lives, biological makeup etc for their crass, snooping database. Someone remind me - who is supposed to be whose servant here?

And then they wonder why most of us wouldn't trust them as far as we could throw them. I never thougfht I'd find myself saying it, but three cheers for the Daily Telegraph for omitting the black blobs and exposing the black hearts.

'Alien' lifeform wakened from 120,000 year Arctic slumber

Nothing to worry about.

After all, we know that (by the laws of prehistoric Science Fiction writing software)

... it will catch the common cold and die, or

... it will be killed by a band of peasants with torches, or

... a cute kid will talk to it of God and it will die, or

...

UK.gov to create central cybersecurity agency

Great.

Another bunch of unelected, faceless, "devious, underhand, shady " bastards screwing things up in the name of their imaginary "security". Just what we need.

Johnson shuffle returns ID cards to the table

@Ted Treen

"... amazed they are allowed to be outside an institution"? - Surely that's why the politicians think the whole damn country has to be turned into a secure prison camp, since they obviously regard us with such comtempt.

My New Political Model: the Bathwater model of society.

Definition: The scum floats to the top.

We need to skim it off, and soon.

Carter to cart self back to big business

Another

damned revolving door. There should be a law against it, but I guess the gravy train just won't stop long enough to pass one.

Imagine! Government to legislate against badness

Cool

So, in future all our poor kids can be adopted by Madonna. Sounds good to me. If they extend it to the old and sick maybe I'll get a decent retirement after all ... I'd even be prepared to put up with all that Kabbalah crap.

BOFH: Stick this

Two sticks?

Let's hope nobody in HMG reads BOFH ... might give them ideas!

Magic. Thanks, Simon.

Site news: Unique commenter handles coming

A title is required, but is not provided

Re: suggestions "at the usual place" ... which pub, exactly, is that?

And for anyone who has ever wondered, "Nebulo" is Latin for "layabout", so I rather fear a rash of us, given the amount of comment on these august pages.

Met 'studies Chinese bugging tactics' for 2012 games

@steogede

There were Chinese police over here a year or so ago, studying how London did CCTV, learning from the masters. We police states gotta stick together, you know.

Pirate Party wins seat in European Parliament

Funny ...

Not nearly as many clearly pirate-oriented posts here as I was expecting. Seems to be about something called something like the Bogus Nautical Pirates, to judge by their initials.

So, well done, me 'earties, an' see you 'ere next time round. Arrr.

Netizens tell court NebuAd's not dead

Of course, with my chosen name ...

... I really, truly wish I could support another Nebu-anything.

As it is, may they, Phorm and all their kin rot in hell. Slowly.

Israeli TV star ordered execs beaten up

Ha!

Sounds like he's in training for the International Zionist Illuminati World Domination project (as detailed on so many other sites).

The only good Topaz is William Topaz McGonagall.

Britain leads world in police state survey

Not so very surprising, though

This has been on the cards since that story last year about the Chinese sending people over to the UK to study how London does CCTV. When THEY are taking lessons from US in repression, you just know things have gone thoroughly rotten.

Oh, and El Reg, I do agree with Wayland (14:41 GMT). You really must stop talking about "Britain slowly sleepwalking toward becoming a surveillance society". That phrase suggests a degree of futurity which is years out of date. Britain IS a surveillance society, and has been for years now. Come on. Open your eyes, look around. It's easy. Count the cameras, the databases, the "terror" laws being used against innocent citizens, the officious little shites who are being given the power to fork up your life in the name of some bit of vacuous doublespeak, and, and ...

What we need to be talking about is, how we break our way out of the S.S. (such /appropriate/ initials, my dear!) and smash it into little bits which can't be put back together, ever. Not pretending that it's just some vague threat.

Boffins: Ordinary lightbulbs can be made efficient, cheaply

@Dave and Ed

Hang on - aren't green laser pointers done with an IR laser blasting its energy into a crystal which then glows green (and apparently *equally coherent* green, too - cool stuff)? Sounds as though the field of IR-to-visual energy conversion already exists, and if there is a mass market to be had I'm sure the cash would turn up for a bit of further research into different coloured / more efficient materials.

Meanwhile, I want one of those zappers, just to see what a "femtosecond-long pulse of extremely high-energy laser light" might do to a CCTV ...

Jacqui whacks shock jock crock

Alas

that both sides are very unlikely to disappear, notwithstanding that most of the country would love to see it.

But there is a certain fascination in watching two thoroughly vile specimens circling round each other and hissing. We'll have to content ourselves with applauding each hit and praying for maximum damage all round.

A nice sideshow to watch while Western civilisation falls apart.

Microsoft, Asus launch anti-Linuxbook campaign

Can't help wondering

whether half Joe Public's problem is that he looks at a word which is obviously "lye-nux" but which its techies insist is "linnux". No such problem with "windows". (Other problems, yes, a thousand times yes, but not pronunciation.)

Sorry, it's me sinnus trouble making me ... all right, I'm going ...

Home Office to keep innocent DNA samples

Heavy sanctions please, EU

Untli these criminals are brought into line. That's all.