* Posts by Alan Fisher

238 publicly visible posts • joined 12 Jun 2008


Microsoft fans call for Opera boycott

Alan Fisher

MS Fanboiz....

damn the EU for stopping a already huge company from becoming a monopoly eh?

Same folks who complain about mobile providers locking data tethering etc support MS who do the same

ASBO woman cuffed over raucous rumpy-pumpy

Alan Fisher


Well I have had relationships with a couple of what can be called, in today's PC parlance, Louder Ladies (or Expressive Ladies) in my time I seem to find that it does not seem to be something they can help.....what exactly are they suposed to do? Shag in a soundproofed basement?

Are they planning to make sex illegal now? sheesh!

Alan Fisher


obviously the neighbours are frustrated because they aren't getting any....

there, somebody said it, now we can move on! :D

Phorm boss blogs from a dark, dark place

Alan Fisher

Privacy Pirate

I wonder when Kent will figure out just how Oxymoronic that epithet is? Probably never because it's a clever "sound byte" for the media which doesn't have to actually mean anything as long as it sounds snappy

of course no-one will query or question -> people love their snappy-sounding nonsense and phorm will of course get away with it because anyone who objects is a Privacy Pirate, and nobody wants to be one of those now do they???


Pirate Bay judge and pro-copyright lobbyist accused of bias

Alan Fisher

Let's clear the AC's up

Right the neighbourhood watch membership reference is facile in the extreme; there is nobody who really support burglary; even someone who often burgles or even dabbles in homestead larceny would object to being themselves burgled.....QED

But let's say in a trial against a Holocaust denier where said mook gets off, the judge turns out to be a prominent natiionalist or member of a nationalist organisation? Conflict

In this case the judge is part of a lobby group which exists not to stop criminality only but to further the interests of large organisations which could be affected by copyright issues (ie are losing money to people not necessarily breaking any law; not directly making reference to TPB here, simply hypothesising) is also a conflict of interests. A judge in any case must be impartial and follow the law as it stands (or follow precident if he/she sees fit) not adapt the law to suit the interests of lobbyists.

NASA rover resurrected twice over Easter weekend

Alan Fisher

it begins

and Spirit became self-aware on 11th April 2009, foremost in it's mind the desire to return to it's maker and thank them for it's 5 year abandonment.....

Advertising watchdog okays 'gaming equals early grave' ad

Alan Fisher

In other news....

one the the complaining gamers "Ihazgotzabiggazz", a prominent and vocal gaming blogger almost went outside during the DAY in order to complain, but then changed his mind and opened a new bag of Cheezy Poofs, which he consumed with savage disgust

Mormons demand ICANN plugs net smut hole

Alan Fisher

title edit...

"Mormons require ICANN plugs for face butt hole"

Alan Fisher

@ J. Max Wilson

J. Max....it is exactly contained in your message why people jump to those conclusions....LDS like to try and insert religious bias into the legislature and carry on all High and Mighty about 'morality' on subjects which recieve but a passing mention in the bible of any faith.

Religious laws affect their practitioners but not people who do not follow your religion, these 'laws' do no apply. Thus what offends people of your faith may well not offend people who follow not that faith.

Thusly, your ministers can concentrate on assuring their congregations conform to your moral codes and do with with impunity and no reproach. However it is when they try to tell non-mormons how we should live our lives.....that tends to annoy folks you see?

Live and let live I believe was Jesus' general attitude; I believe you should follow it and leave non-mormons alone.

Thank you

Lights out, Britons told - we're running out of power

Alan Fisher

ah well

We HAVE brought this upon ourselves despite what anyone might say. Ok not directly but very much indirectly. The clean energy technology is at least 40 years but it was never developed or taken seriously because of the oil company monopoly and the fact people never bothered to challenge this.....now we have everyone panicking and trying to develop the technology in a hurry when we could have had fully functioning cheap technology years ago, without all of these foreseen problems.

I dispair at the stubborness and shortsightedness of the human race!

Scientology spokesman confirms Xenu story

Alan Fisher

@sarah bee

something like founding The Grand Order of Nihilists isn't it? Or is it Proof of nihism?

for all the historical evidence of Jesus et al crowd, read Frank Herbert's Dune as that's what it's all about, a hero who is just a normal (although exceptional) man who is made into Messiah by a downtrodden and persecuted people (sound familiar)? Then his teachings end up corrupted and result in Jihad.....hmmmmm

Obese cost London fire brigade £300k

Alan Fisher

Eat like a sparrow

Though i have yet to see it, I have heard some obese folks describe their consumption habits as ' I eat like a sparrow' meaning they consume very little indeed....but

have you seen sparrows eat? They are greedy little barstewards I can tell you!

I'd be spherical if I ate like one of those feathered gormands!

Jobless Brits face influx of foreign IT workers

Alan Fisher


The main reason foreign workers get jobs in the uk or those which were formally uk based, and people from the uk don't seem to be doing the same is simple;

People in the UK tend to not speak a second language.

It's simple, if more UK people who were technically minded bothered to learn foreign languages, companies would not need to go abroad/seek foreigners to do the work AND UK citizens could take advantage of the EU Right to Work thing and get jobs in other countries, non?

Pirate Bay prosecutor argues for one year prison terms

Alan Fisher

Open Letter to the IPFI;

This just about covers my feelings on the matter;

The Pirate Bay Farce, I mean trial‏

From: Alan Fisher (xxxxx.xxxxx@.xxxxcom)

Sent: 03 March 2009 11:53:27

To: euroinfo@ifpi.org

Dear IFPI,

using a variety of sources, including your own website, I follow this debacle with an increasing mixture if interest and wide-mouthed disbelief. I do not download using the site in question but, like all IT professionals, have heard of them and am sure I know a number of people who avail of their services.

I find the IPFI's apparent desperation to bend the legislature in order to ensure they do not lose this trial (let's face it, if you do it does make your organisation a bit suplus to requirements) when it is clear to any other person following the case that there is not a case to be answered.

I can thus far see the following;

1). Håkan Roswall, your chief prosecutor, is playing the emotional aspect, as well as the layman's lack of technical details, up to his projected advantage. This reeks of deperation and is unpleasant to read about. Surely this is not the face your organisation wishes to present to the world? If we are to look to you for our copyright interests, I do not feel encouraged.

2) The Pirate Bay might have, slightly, indirectly, somehow, facilitated someone to provide someone with the possible, likely, potential means to maybe infringe copyright. Why the persuit of these men continues escapes me. Mr Roswall's reasoning again lapses into what I call "Law and Order Mode" or "Hollywood lawyer mode"; I feel he is going to seek the prosecution of knife manufacturers and gun manufacturers next? Afterall, their products are produced with the implicit purpose of the cause of harm are they not? One does not use a gun, or purchase such in order to prop up a shelf now does one? One purchases said firearm in order to discharge it. Therefore the blame is upon those who supply to the demand is it not? They profit from it also, considerably so. By your Organisation's reasoning, this is the path we should take. Can I quote you on that stance?

If I cannot I must ask why, should you be successful in this prosecution, why not? If the precendent applies for one, surely it must apply across the board? Will you be seeking manufacturers of recordable CD/DVD media next? They supply the means to copy the products of your members afterall. How about ripping/burning software? The list does go on so I would most humbly request the answers to the following questions;

1). Do the views Mr Roswall expressed in the media comply with those of the IFPI?

2). Does the IFPI, should they obtain a judgement in their favour in this case intend to expand the list of people they seek to prosecute?

3). Would the IFPI advocate full application of the precendent Mr Roswall seems to be putting forward?

4). Does this potential precendent meet with the aims of the IPFI as an organisation?

5). How far does the 'net' the IFPI wishes to cast go? What other activities will be classified as potential copyright infringements in the future?

6). Is providing the means an actual crime?

thank you in advance and I look forward to recieving a promt and well-considered response.


Earthworm blamed for laptop crash

Alan Fisher

@sarah bee

Oooh Miss Bee, you ARE sharp today! lol

I am very well-scented thank you; well most of the time anyway......ah...I think...errrr

I do prefer dogs too (though my current one is nuttier than a squirrel's poo) I find them much more entertaining and amusing than cats could ever be!

But no, I see no one species as the better one lol as you said very well earlier on, it's an evolutionary thing; dogs we have as pets are subservient and do not much thinking because they see their owners as the alpha male/female and therefore indisputably in charge (a left over from their wolf days)....I'll be honest, dog being happy to have you in charge is much, much better than dog who wants to be in charge...the papers are full of them....

Alan Fisher

oh noooo not cats & dogs again...

People feel the need to fight over which kind of pet is better need to get some perspective....either that or they have self esteem issues ;-p why project on your animals? I've had a variety of different pets; a fish or two, a parrot, a gerbil, a couple of cats (at different times) and now a dog (though i've had dogs in the past) so what does that make me?

Pirate Bay prosecutors get jiggy with charge sheet - again

Alan Fisher

The Charges

Will soon be changed to ;

"Acting in an Un-American way"

"Using technologificificationment to further the cause of global terrorism"

"being smart and answering back"

"maybe being in the same room/house/town/city/country/planet as that where an illegal activity took place"

In a way I do feel for the Big Bucks Inc. folks though because if this case collapses, the gravy train is off the rails and burning in a ditch for ever and ever; everyone knows this case will change things for good and the companies want to keep on making insane amounts of cash but will they?

UK boffin: Social networking causes cancer, heart attacks, lupus, dementia...

Alan Fisher


"Cancer is the disease of regrets and extreme sadness" I can't remember who said that but have a look on wikipedia or ask someone on your friends list about it ;)

there has been a corrolation between a number of c ancer cases and self distructive (although passively so) behaviour.....not universally accepted of course but these things never are

Minister trashes ex-spook chief's liberty warning

Alan Fisher

typical politician

he is hardly likely to say "oh bugger you got me" and admit that's what they doing now are they...not yet anyway.....

this is just rattle throwing as he knows that the educated and clever people (the minority....intellectuals..see the pattern emerging?) will listen to that 'evil woman' while the plebs who read the papers will continue to swallow the "foreigners, terrorists, druggies, liberals and peados" rhetoric of their favourite former chip wrapper

Alan Fisher

Our Enemies??

McCarthy-ism anyone? I'm amazed just how potty Britain has gone since I left but, looking at it; I think the only place you could be safe these days is in a cabin in some isolated woods or in a cave underground!

I would like these power-crazed politicos to tell people who their enemies are though, just in case they pass one on the street or something?

Landmark copyright trial against Pirate Bay gets underway

Alan Fisher

whether or not

you're a freetard, don't you find it worrying that the Swedish police were pressured by the US Govt on what is, in essence a CIVIL MATTER? I find it scary that the Big Boys Inc. are able to influence politics in this way.......

As a matter of high principle (ie US Govt keep their snouts out of other people's sovereign laws and judiciary) I hope the members of Big Boys Inc. lose!

And yes, as mentioned this move is scare all freetards away...just like they did with Napster....and Limewire...and.....oh what do you mean it made it woooooorse??

Kids online: Parents need to regulate, says Ofcom

Alan Fisher

Give the man an icecream!

Well.....not exactly earth-shattering but at last someone "important" talking actual common sense instead of blaming Pugh, Pugh and Barney Mcgrue or whoever else happens to spring to mind.....blame those who are actually at fault; the parents!

At last!

Vatican endorses Darwin, slights intelligent design

Alan Fisher

Even in literature

Memnoch the Devil by Anne Rice gives the perfect example of creationalism and evolution together. Now I'm not a believer in the benign, flowing robes God myself but this one makes you pause; the best quote is this "God and the Devil are moral idiots" ...it undermines the belief of god as we know it and makes interesting reading.....I believe in some kind of creative force but not an antropomorphic entity who's directly involved but something beyond our ability to conprehend; another form of life perhaps.....ie God is an alien!! Mwhaaahahhaaha let hellfire and brimstone come my way! lol

Jacqui Smith cracks down on gangs via computers, closets

Alan Fisher

In order

for the anarchy which will blossom around 2015 to take place and for chaos to spread like any form of fire at all (why does wildfire get all the press?) there must first be something to oppose.

Things will get worse before they get better, it's unfortunate but true.

But when it does happen think of this; you let it happen. You sat and read articles; you complained on El Reg but what else did you do? Gathered to march and demonstrate no matter the consequences? or did you wait for the next story to complain about, and the next, and the next and then....no more ability to complain......the reason things like this can happen in Britain is obvious; British people complain a lot, and understandably so in many case, but are very slow to actually do anything about. Sitting in a chair complaining never solved anything.

I no longer live in the UK (thank [insert deity name]) and intend to move further away than I currently do so I shall make no stand as I live there not but if i did, there are ways to resist which are listened to and do not involve violence

You're barcoded: The sneaky under-25 route to compulsory ID

Alan Fisher


what's the big deal? The only people seriously worried should be the underage or heavy drinkers surely? Also, ID to open bank accounts? Been doing that for years, same with any form of credit agreement.....

I'm not sure how much this whole anti-id-for-anything attitude reflects the same as the Daily Fail crowd but to me it's no biggie really is it?

I mean, if you want to be paranoid about Big Brother consider; there are CCTV cameras pretty much everywhere so if Large Male Sibling wishes to know what you are doing then then Senior Male Fellow Offspring already knows........there've been ID cards in Spain for years

Man robs convenience store with Klingon sword

Alan Fisher


"he demanded three dozen out of date Cornish pasties to complete his look"

I know, I know but someone had to say it!

Deviants, perverts, 'weirdos' - who's going down?

Alan Fisher

Cue the next Malware/Virus attack

just you wait, a malware, virus attack which fills your harddrive with obscene material or at least directs you browser to a hosting site and....well the rest is stripy overalls and so forth....try and prove it isn't yours, Deviant!

Alan Fisher

Blanket law

as someone else mentioned before, this law will do precisely what is required AND is vague for that very reason.....to stop people held under the Prevention of Terrorism Act from getting away....find extreme porn of any description on their computer and you've got 'em! Never mind that they never viewed it, it's there so they must have....

It's a scary law and gives too many powers to nail (no pun intended) anyone for anything.....I'm glad I left the UK, but people who remain should be afraid...

You can no longer taker photos in public

You can no longer own photos/videos which might be 'obscene' (read will offend someone, somewhere)

You can no longer demonstrate

Television censorship by tabloid has begun

what's next? They'll start with the Moslems and foreigners, then gay and lesbian people, then the BDSM community....the masses won't complain because the tabloids will keep the "immorality" thing going on...then they'll sit back and realise, much too late that it, in fact, is.

ECJ: Sick workers earn holiday entitlement

Alan Fisher


"a blow to businesses when times are hard"

well businesses have been giving us blows whether times are hard or not. About time business realised that we workers are their biggest assets and it's time to treat us like humans, not cattle.

I've had a "more than acceptable" number of days off sick in the last 6 months due to totally unavoidable circumstances; severe tooth infection, being knocked off my bike by a 4-wheeled fool and gastoenteritis....I was evn taken to a disciplinary for it, until I challenged their right to do that, the disciplinary was suddenly dropped.

But how can companies think they can do that and get away with it? To threaten to fire someone because they've been ill "more often than is allowed"? Like that's something one can control!

National Safety Council seeks total* cell-phone driving ban

Alan Fisher

My 10 cents

Why don't people pour R&D money into the whole automated driving on motorway/freeway thing? Think of the accidents which wouldn't happen, the money it would save.....

then people could talk on the phone as much as they liked!

until the day this is a possibility, then yes, no mobile use while driving! I've nearly been knocked off my bicycle by idiots yapping on the mobile (flaunting current laws) and paying no attention to the road.....makes me feel that enforcing the law should not be voluntary here!

'Lord of the Universe' disciple exits Wikipedia

Alan Fisher


You actually have it spot on, Wikipedia has the potential to be a prime example of Life imitating Art......as a social experiment it is a good one...everyone knows it's inaccurate (often wildly) but no-one stops using it because it's so so much easier to wiki something than trawl through your local library or through hundreds of possible hits on google.....

and I'll be honest, it is handy for niche interest areas or little known topics; I've spent hours on there reliving childhood memories on comic books and tv shows from my yoof...

also an opinion of mine (uncited) is that most history is biased, based upon belief and opinion anyway, didn't Caesar say "History is written by the Victors"? Or did someone else say that but he won and took the credit?

Israel hacks Arab TV station

Alan Fisher

If ever

you needed proof of a NeoCon Conspiracy or NWO "taking over the world" theory, this is it.....the US supports Israel no matter what they do...why?

Book of Revelations provides an interesting insight; it talks about God being angered by the excesses of the Israelites; their neighbours massing to drive them from the land and being pushed to the sea. Only the White Dragon and Yellow Eagle (ideas anyone?) will side with them and in the end all the races of Man will be embroiled....

is this in the process of happening or are some people making sure it does?

It also mentions the war in Iraq (something about the "Cradle of Man" - city of Ur in modern-day Iraq - and Babylon - also in Iraq) as the precursor to this amageddon-type scenario...

or Obama would end the war in Iraq and thus the war against the Arab, the Christian-Republican Crusade, Bush's lot are making that as difficult as possible, if not impossible for him to do

Glastonbury new-agers protest WiFi

Alan Fisher


Well said and, to the most part I agree with you but, and here is a the big but(t), science must also admit what it does not know in order to progress, you see. To say something is a definate work of the imagination of a sub-set of persons is to do what monothesistic religions have done for millenia, surely? We already know that there elements of the human mind we do not yet understand (I think we never will, one cannot figure out what a hammer does by using another hammer) and there is the possibility that the mind can do things as yet unclassified? I'm not going to go into all the particulars and possibilities themselves now because this is neither the time nor the place but why can they not exist? Other forms of energy we have not yet measured, quantum effects and influences? Who knows what the mind if capable of percieving? The issue here is that there have been plenty of observations of phenomena science cannot explain but these observations have been largely ignored because not enough maths is involved or because there are no machines which can measure said things.

Now the scientific brain does tend to reject that which occurs beyond the sphere of science or anything which sounds 'fanciful' which strikes me as odd because the foundations of science were built by people who were, in their time, considered to be, to say the least, a bit wierd. Now I am not trying to convince anyone or change the opinions of anyone, merely to see if people can accept that there are things they do no know. No wild-haired prophet am I, giving you answers. No, I'm just asking questions, just like everyone else. If you reject these or choose to insult those who ask them, more fool you really.

Personally i feel that one day things such as ghosts, psychic phenomenon and other 'paranormal' activity will be scientifically explainable and the whitecoats will triumphantly tell the world what many of us have suspected for some time already but such is the way of the world; nothing exists until science proves it does.

Alan Fisher

the refuge of the ignorant

is insults, didn't your mother ever teach you that when you were getting bullied at school?

Who is worse a radical Christian who says that all homosexuals are evil because the bible might possible mention something along those lines or a close minded fool who shuts out all opinions which are contrary to their own and do not fit into their very limited dogma....oh wait....

science, like everything else and any other form of investigaton is just that, another torch shined into the dark to see what's there. Just because something cannot be explained, does not mean it cannot exist; ask a scientist that eh? Dark matter anyone? Dark energy? Photon scattering? Quantum gravitational effects? Can't be explained but may exist.....who said science precludes faith?

Alan Fisher

well we're all f***ed anyway

we're doing, eating, soaking up and osmocising so much stuff we never evolved to cope with over recent years that we're pretty much doomed anyway, deal with one and another will get us.

Switch off the RF and it'll be excessive hygiene that'll kill us off like the aliens in War of the Worlds!!

trust humans eh, we are determined to find an effective way to do ourselves damage and we won't stop until we crack it (note nuclear war is too quick and painless for the majority so we discarded that one)!!

Alan Fisher

Just as i expected

I knew you lot would immediately pan this and so too, I suspect, did the author (maybe they've got a 'Most commented' commission structure?).....

however I do have to throw my 5 cents into the ring. When i first started using bluetooth many years ago I always knew when a call was coming in because I did get a curious headachey feeling just as it sucked the radiation down from the sky or whatever. It was such that i actually stopped using bluetooth for some time and only use bluetooth headphones now, never for calls.....so in my opinion hippy imagination only it is not. We're quite happy to have radio signals in the magnitude of zag (I copyright the word now) whizzing around our heads 24/7, how can that not be having some effect?

Terry Pratchett knighted for services to literature

Alan Fisher

It's about time!

I enjoy Sir Terence's novels immensely, no-one else manages such amusing satire quite like he does....Michael Moore perhaps but maybe he learned from Sir T? We also have him to thank for some of the best works of Neil Gaiman, among others; truly he is the John Peel of the Literary world (he even looks a bit like him now lol)

I also met him at a book signing many moons ago and was amazed by the way he dealt with his fans. The signing was due to end at 12 o'clock I think but the queue was huge and it was clear that not everybody would get even into the shop by that time, me among them. I was ready for disappointment then at five past, someone came out and told us that he was going to stay until he'd seen us all and bugger the schedule (I later spoke to his events manager who was in a fluster about in his words "that stubborn old bugger", they had to reschedule signings a lot it seemed as he made quite a habit of it!). I even asked terry about it when my turn came and he said that his fans bought his books and made him famous so the least he could do was see all of them when turned up to see him! I wonder how many other famous figures would do that? He saw every last person too, and had time for a quick chat with each one, a true gent in every sense!

an honour well deserved and let's ignore the fick trolls who are just trying to stir up an argument eh?

Bees on cocaine: The facts

Alan Fisher


sometimes I wonder about why we allow these people to have research money.....I'll bet some of the white powder goes walkies too....hmmmm

coking up innocent bees....that's sick people. What's next? Ants on acid? Humming birds on heroine? Termites on te 'eerb? If i gave blow to my dog to see how it affected his behaviour, I'd be justifiably locked up!

Microsoft gives XP another four months to live

Alan Fisher


you're telling me that a lot of the legacy apps I paid for would not work on Vista?? So I would have to wait for "compatible versions" to come out and pay for them again?? Why?

If I shelled out a few grand on apps I use just fine now, why should microscoffed tell me that I need to ditch my (admittedly) old rig to pay out not only for a new one but also to be unable to use my apps because they don't want me to anymore?


Censored scenes from the Congress WMD report

Alan Fisher

Bioterror eh?

So all the big contributors to the GOP; GSK and their ilk will of course not benefit at all from this eh?

The Mother of All Demos — 150 years ahead of its time

Alan Fisher

@AC 11/12 21:44

I can see why you AC'd if you were going to be abusive but never mind, you're entitled to your opinions....I suggest you do some research on GSK and some other pharma companies...besides these are examples I consider relevent and merely highlight a very relevent point; why has research taken so long to be done? In the last 40 years, there has only been massive technological development quite recently..

anyway, thanks for your constructive comments, so politely expressed, you're a star!

Oil though....hmmmm....we only start to work on developing technologies when it's already starting to run out, how clever of us eh?

Price of bills and so forth these days...the problems in the world, where the oil is located and a global crash began by rocketing oil prices wouldn't have anything to do with that now would it?

Silly boy

Alan Fisher


If he was agreeing with me mate I think he meant this, a good example;

A well known drug company gets two innovative proposals; one is for a drug which will eliminate AIDS, another will attenuate the same virus' effects. The former is used once and never again, the latter will be administered for the rest of the user's life. Which do you think they pour money into?

Same works with computing, big business controls what gets out there and research is motivated by how much money someone can get from this or that, not for the benefit of mankind but for the benefit of their pockets. Look how progress is held back in order to serve the interests of the few.....

**Electric Vehicles - but the Oil Companies would lose money; only now being developed when technology has been around for ever

**Operating Systems - windows and mac control the roost, linux systems etc are marginal, used by IT enthusiasts and shunned by most people because there is no drive to help them understand how to use them, and none of their favourite apps/games would work anyway

**Drugs; people suffering from diseases and epidemics do not recieve drugs because they can't afford them. Drugs are not even developed because they'd make companies no money.

that's the problem, innovation is being strangled by the Suits because it's all about dollar signs

Alan Fisher

simply put

People who want to change the world don't get the funding because world-changing things like things like this don't turn a fast buck. It's that simple....IT is all about money now so unless crazy innovators can promise pots of cash right away, no-one's interested......sad but true

Harvard prof slams US nut allergy hysteria

Alan Fisher


Hey mate, I'm not THAT old!! I'm only in my 30's and there seem to have been less allergies then too.....

I see the Dark Ages comparison but we're only talking about 20 or so years ago here.....that's what I meant..

It's like "Disorders" (usually the last or close to last letter of a fancy acronym); we had none of those when I were a nipper either, now we've got so many, I've lost count. Now any loony overactive child is ADHD and given loads of drugs...good thing?

and yes there is a point, I was with a girl years ago and I am of excellent cleanliness, she was borderline OCD (there's one); guess who had more allergies and got ill more often? No I!

Alan Fisher

The question remains

why were fewer people allergic to things when I were a lad than they are today? Nowadays, there is at least one person who is allergic to something or other...you name it, I'll find someone allergic to it on google!

Is filming someone in the street a breach of privacy?

Alan Fisher

@AC Today 10:16am

Mate, if that happened to me I'd think I was having a weird dream or was on candid camera or some shuch show!! Then I'd probably enjoy it for a time, people looking at me wondering why I was on a poster and then walking around like a normal person and looking slightly scruffy when I'm obviously famous, if I'm on a billboard.....

it'd be too good a head-fking opportunity to waste!!!

Alan Fisher

like so many here say

this sounds very like transferrence; she's upset about being called a tubster or the very implication of such and this is what she objects to....however does not realise (in her whatever-the-local-equivalent-of-the-Daily-Mail-is mind) that being doing this she will be exposing herself to even more ridicule and having her face all over that cover of her selfsame favourite example of the gutter press..will she try to sue them for doing that too??

This is just another example of why we need some kind of global natural catastrophe and soon, a lot of the human race could do with being wiped out! We're turning into self-deluding, obsessive and greedy, grasping people and this can only get worse. Also the whole "you can't call me fat" thing annoys the heck out of me, I used to be fat myself (to use the very un-PC term) and staying thin takes a lot of effort and willpower but I manage, why can't these people? Viz, tis no-one's fault but their own!

I hope they countersue and take away all her biscuit money!

Alan Fisher

and so it begins

you'll have the BBC getting sued by people who appear in the background during news reports or anyone who appears in anything filmed anywhere! The greed of people (on two counts here I feel) is to blame but just as much the greed of solictors who will represent anyone for anything these days, anywhere is a sniff of some money!

I wonder if she'd have complained had it been a different kind of show, if it was a fashion show I'll be she'd have loved it! The flexibility of people's morals eh? I suppose the lady is question was of a larger build? The Reg didn't say but I can't imagine a thin person objecting to this somehow...

the world has gone bonkers! Trying to sue one's parents for somehow conceiving an ugly or somehow disadvantaged child is only round the corner.......

Bollywood to remake The Italian Job

Alan Fisher


I'd personally love to hear a bhangra take on the Imperial March and I wonder how they' do Yoda-Ji! Lol

UK e-tailers scurry to scrap dodgy Heavy Metal covers

Alan Fisher

Huzzah and double huzzah!

The Victorian age is dead, says you? Ha! Says I that it indeed is alive and well, sir! Ladies and gentlemen of all classes and backgrounds may now rejoice (well not rejoice as this is unseemly) and go back to being sober and sensible after our decades of excess and depravity!! All praise to the good lady smith and her cohorts for their vigilence (Beware! Be Vigilent! Behave!) and good taste! Time to hack of the David statue's unmentionable and all those obscence lady parts of those vile Greek statues! All that supposed 'art' showing vulgar images of a...a...ahem..intimate..nature of parts of the body which are best left hidden!

This is a fine beginning! Let us welcome the new Victorian age!