Posts by lee lawson

Hadron boffins: Our meddling will not destroy universe

business opportunity missed

I think we are all missing the opportunity we have here. If these crazy clock making scientists can make mini-black holes, which I am assuming to be about the size of a mini-babybel, then there are many uses. Such as:

Human Race mistake eraser

* Suspend the mini-black hole over Bejing and suck up all the polution. Solved!

* Place a mini-black hole in each nuclear power station for safe and clean removal of nuclear waste. Solved!

* Land fill? Not any more, not with the handy "mini-black hole land fill reducer". Solved!

* Why waste money on lethal injections? Just pop the murdering rapist into the mini-black hole. Solved!

* You've seen CSI and have just murdered someone and are worried about evidence at the crime scene? You should be! etc etc etc.

Mini-black holes also have a domestic use such as:

* Place a mini-black hole in the bottom of your bin and simply throw everything away! No need to waste precious minutes of your life separating the recycling. Solved!

* Want to go out but cannot find a good babysitter? Simply suspend your children on a rope and pop them into the mini-black hole for a few hours while you go out and get wasted, then just pull the little beggars back in when you get home. Solved!

The first company to harnass this technology for the highest bidder will do well, in fact, I'm going on Dragon's Den with this idea.

What I learned from a dumb terminal

another confused story

hi,

I have similar stories from many years supporting military networks. I used to work in the army where I was a network/server engineer for the joint HQ in Europe. We had hundreds of 'mobile' computer stations, I put that in quotes as each computer was a two man lift!!

Essentially we had rows and rows of tables lined up and deployed the computers onto them, computer/mouse, computer/mouse etc etc etc.

We had a call from a high ranking military officer who told us that his mouse wasn't working and that he wanted us to fix it immediately, he was off for a briefing and wanted it fixed by the time he got back.

Well I turned up and logged on, the mouse worked fine! no problems. 30 minutes later he called again in a fury saying that we were incompentant and that he needed his mouse to do his job. Again he was off for another meeting and demanded it was fixed while he was away.

This went on for a little while, we even logged into his console remotely so he could see what the cursor looked like!

It finally came to the point where I had lost my patience with the DFU and told him to wait by his computer for me to turn up. I did. He showed me that his mouse wasn't working. He was the only left handed user on that row and it turned out he was using the mouse the his neighbour's computer!!!!

I told him that the problem laid with him using the wrong mouse, again he exploded telling me to reconfigure the desk so that he could work. So I lifted the mouse and carefully placed it on the left of his computer.

DFU.

all the best,

lee.

Heathrow T5 security tackles Transformers t-shirt threat

Hidden Menace

This is just so typical of airport security staff that do not understand the real implications of their actions. I used to work in an Army bomb disposal team and I am confident that I can sneak a bomb through airport security, but that's beside the point. When they are employing staff that have not gone through basic security checks then they are leaving themselves wide open to attack by the 'back door'.

Doing this kind of thing will just alienate the security staff from the public and slowdown the whole process.

I have a colleague that responded with the below text when I sent this link around work:

"I’m not surprised... airport staff confiscated (correction: when I asked for a receipt to prove they had taken it they said they don’t do that because in fact I was “voluntarily surrendering” it) my Kensington laptop lock on the pretence that I could use it as a restraint. Of course a cunning terrorist would simply buy one in the departure lounge from Dixons..."

He actually checked that you can buy the exact same model for £14.99 from the terminal shop!!! When will the insanity end?